Shadowing Practice: you are creating your own suffering - Learn English Speaking with Video
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Hi guys, and welcome back to my channel.
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I'm back with another podcast episode because I have more that I want to say.
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So sorry for people who have been missing my vlogs or missing my more, I guess, like, I don't know, content where I'm not just sat and talking at you guys and I actually film with like a nicer camera.
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If you've been missing that, that will come soon.
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But recently I've just had so many thoughts and I think it's
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because I'm done with uni that like suddenly I feel like everything has been like clicking
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and ticking and I've been able to think about things that are not just my degree and my assignments.
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Basically, the reason this podcast episode has come about is
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because I used to think a lot about the concept of like radical acceptance
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and I think there were a lot of books
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and a lot of conversations with friends at a certain point in my life
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that really seemed to have this central theme of just extreme acceptance
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and I'd not thought about it in a while but I think
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because I had that time of really thinking about it
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so much it became a bit of a habit
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that has definitely weakened with time and then the other night I was led
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and I was basically just thinking about the situation of a friend
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that happened ages ago it was really weird it's not like I was upset about it
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or I don't know secretly resentful about it
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or anything I was just thinking about it I was thinking
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about a friend opening up to me about the fact
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that they were annoyed about something that I had done I kind of just explained
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that it wasn't something that i had done in
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that moment it was something that other people do but
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that i recognize that i do as well and also it wasn't something
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that is like actually bad or anything it was just like i guess like an incompatibility
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so it's not like i'd like done her dirty or something like
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that and that i had felt quite defensive
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because i didn't feel like it was really fair like i mean obviously their feelings are valid
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but i didn't really feel like i'd done anything that bad
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and i was thinking about that kind of like dichotomy of like their feelings are valid
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but why do I feel annoyed and defensive like I'm acting as
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if their feelings aren't valid and I was reflecting on my emotions
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and what was the root of that response and I think it's
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because I was reading into what my friend was saying
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and I think this is like a very common thing something
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that I used to do a lot
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and I think a lot of people do where I don't just take someone's emotions
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or what someone is saying for what it is in itself I kind of like add more to it
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and assume there's more that isn't meeting the eye and assume
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that actually they aren't just telling me they're annoyed
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but they're also through that annoyance expressing that they want something to change
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and part of that assumption is because a lot of people do do
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that I used to do that a lot where I wouldn't communicate very directly
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and when I was upset about something I would want it to change
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but I wasn't brave enough to ask for it to change
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and so when I'd express annoyance I was actually expressing a want for the situation to change
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but I also think it's not entirely necessary to take those things as
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that so I was like oh okay
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if I just accept my friends emotions for what they are
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because in this case I hadn't really done anything it really
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was one of those situations were like it's not like I'd
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done anything shitty it's not like I'd wronged them in any way they were just mildly annoyed about something
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that wasn't really my fault I was like okay
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if I just accept their annoyance as annoyance
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but I don't take it as her asking me to change anything about myself
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because she's not asking that what's the problem like there is no problem actually
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if I just accept her emotions
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and her expressing her emotion as just exactly what it is
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and I don't add anything to it and
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that made me remember like damn radical acceptance was so good back
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when I was like really on it
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so i want to re-reflect about radical acceptance
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and i want to kind of remind myself about all of
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that and i thought i would do it with you guys
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because i have had some comments in the past say
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that it has been really helpful for other people
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and personally it's been really helpful for me
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so let's get into it a quick disclaimer
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because i think whenever i do one of these think pieces on here
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or on tiktok i always get someone who has misunderstood me to a degree
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that like is quite frustrating because that is not at all what i meant
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and it's like one thing if someone gets what I'm saying
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and disagrees because they just disagree like that's completely fine
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but often I'll have comments where it's like whoa
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that is literally like not at all what I was saying
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so I want to make some things very clear
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when I'm saying to accept your situation your lot in life the cards
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that you've been dealt I obviously mean
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that to a certain degree I do think
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that it's important to recognize your wants and your needs and
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if your needs aren't being met in a situation I don't think you should just accept
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that I do think that you should expect more for example
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if you're in a situation where you're being mistreated I do
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not at all like not only am I not saying this but I actually think the opposite.
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I don't think that you should just accept that situation for what it is.
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I think that you should be aware of your boundaries, aware of the things that you are comfortable giving and comfortable receiving.
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And I think that you should not just blindly accept things, especially if you are able to change them.
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By radical acceptance and by acceptance in general, I mean very specifically like accepting situations for what they are in a moment.
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There is quite a lot of nuance in what I mean.
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And I think it is sometimes hard to get across
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if I make a video specifically only honing in on
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that acceptance part i think people then forget the other part
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which is that like i do think
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that we are active participants in our life
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and we shouldn't just blindly accept things as they come
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and just like passively take it all in i do think as like active agents
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or whatever we should be making choices to hopefully lead us to the life
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that we want for example with my friend being annoyed obviously like
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that was like such a not deep situation i guess that's my point
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that like why do i kind of make these situations more
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hurtful than they need to be more frustrating they need to be
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when i could just accept like yeah my friend's a bit annoyed that's fine
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but let's say that my friend was annoyed with me constantly
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and was actually like suggesting that I should change something about myself
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but wasn't directly telling me but was annoyed at me and was like indirectly communicating.
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I personally know that something that I can't really handle is indirect communication.
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I really struggle with it.
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It stresses me out so much.
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I'm just unable to handle indirect communication.
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If someone is indirectly communicating with me and that is like, I don't know, our relationship is based on like me having to be super hyper vigilant
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and like figure out what it is that they're upset about.
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I am not saying to accept that and I personally
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don't think I would accept that or I'd like to think that I wouldn't accept that.
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In that situation what I would ideally do, obviously I probably won't always be perfect and I won't do this every time,
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but what I would like to hope I would do would be to address that, to say I don't like that you're indirectly communicating with me and like expecting me to guess what you're feeling and thinking,
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can you please just tell me?
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And if that continues I'd probably need to take some sort of emotional step back from the friendship.
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I don't mean that I would like cut this person off and cancel them and whatever, I just think I would need to reassess how close I'd like to be with that person.
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But as for like where the radical acceptance comes in, it's accepting all the things that have happened and the choices
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that I have made throughout that whole situation for what they are and not ruminating on it too much.
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Along the way, I think there's a lot of places in
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that situation where I could be more upset than I need to be
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and like kind of I guess like suffer more than I need to.
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For example I could be like oh
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but this person could have been my best friend if only they could communicate better with me, if only they could.
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Once I have said to them I would like you to communicate better and they don't, there's not really much more that I can do
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and I think yeah accepting that they aren't perhaps the person I wish they were.
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I could also be frustrated with myself.
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Oh well why am I such a weakling
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that I can't deal with having to be hyper vigilant
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and I can't deal with people expecting me to be a mind reader.
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Instead of really like you know bashing myself for that, just accepting well that is who I am at the moment.
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I could try to do more than that but to be honest I don't really want to.
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I quite like that boundary that I have.
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Okay well I just accept that.
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That's more where the radical acceptance comes in.
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It's accepting that things have happened.
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All I can control now is what I do moving forward
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and I accept that there are also limitations to what I'm able to do.
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Basically it's like I accept all the limitations
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and I accept the things I can't control
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but where I do have control I do like to exercise it
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and I would never ever suggest that like you should stay in situations
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that you aren't happy in because you should accept the lot you've been given.
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That is not at all what I'm saying
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so I just wanted to make that clear
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because I think sometimes people misunderstand
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that a little bit especially like in situations where like for example you are being literally mistreated and stuff, absolutely you should take the steps to leave that situation.
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So yeah, I just wanted to make that clear.
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Anyways, radical acceptance.
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The reason I use the term radical is because I mean it more than just like, ah, I accept, I accept that that's the case.
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With radical acceptance, I mean the next level where like you are truly not reading too much into anything,
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not wasting precious mental energy trying to figure out where things are coming from, trying to be like this detective, right?
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I think this especially calls to me because I did have issues with hypervigilance growing up.
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I did have issues of like trying to read people's minds
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and constantly figure out if people were mad at me
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And I think for me like the antidote for my anxiety
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when I had really bad anxiety Was acceptance because so much of my anxiety was linked around control
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Trying to control the situation trying to figure out what people are feeling trying to figure out what everyone's doing
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and what will happen So for me where
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so much of it was like thinking and ruminating and plotting
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and scheming because I was so anxious Just switching that off and being like, okay, maybe the worst thing in the world will happen I have to accept
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that it might and in that situation I have to trust
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that I will know what is best for me in
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that moment But I accept that I can't control
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that not happening I can't control the steps leading up to it
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and what other people are doing I can only control how I behave
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if that situation were to happen that for me Saved me it saved me
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and obviously if you don't have issues with that kind of anxiety
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or if you have issues of being Perhaps like too passive in your life, maybe radical acceptance won't work for you and that's okay
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but anyways for me it has been wonderful i remember reading
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let me go find actually in the consolations of philosophy by
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elaine de elaine de botton i don't really like his philosophy
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that much to be honest i've read like other things by him
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and i've seen interviews of him i kind of feel like
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he's a bit of a pseudo philosopher pseudo psychologist kind of like me kind of like the things
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that i post online
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but i think the thing is i don't say sorry i
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don't know why like out of nowhere Alain de Petron is catching such a stray.
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I just don't want to like now read him out and suggest that that's me recommending him.
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I don't really recommend him but I like this book and I recommend this book in particular by him.
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This is a like I guess a really nice introduction to six quite popular philosophers.
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Socrates, Epicurus, Seneca, Montaigne, Schopenhauer and Nietzsche and he simplifies their like main
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or like their most famous philosophies and applies them to current day issues
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so then through that application it becomes really easy to grasp what they're on about um
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so as an intro to philosophy i really like this book however i don't recommend him as a whole
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because i'm a bit of a hater
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but some people aren't some people really like him
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so like actually don't take my recommendation
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and maybe try read him anyways i remember in here coming across this idea
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that really struck me
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and i think it was the schopenhauer part i think it's
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chapter three the consolation for frustration okay never mind i've just read through and it wasn't Schopenhauer, it was Seneca.
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Which makes sense actually because the other books that I read
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that I found really had this idea were all other Stoic books.
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I'm going to read a few little portions out of this chapter.
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This is from part two, A Senecan Dictionary of Frustration.
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Though the terrain of frustration may be vast, from a stubbed toe to an untimely death, at the heart of every frustration lies a basic structure,
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the collision of a wish with an unyielding reality a single idea recurs throughout Seneca's work
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that we best endure those frustrations which we have prepared ourselves for
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and understand and are hurt most by those we least expected and cannot fathom.
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Philosophie must reconcile us to the true dimensions of reality.
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Her task is to prepare for our wishes the softest landing possible on the adamantine wall of reality.
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The chapter then goes on to discuss like a few different, I guess like difficult emotions
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that can arise from not accepting a situation for what it is
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so for example shock a sense of injustice the one
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that really struck me when i first read this
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because i think this is what i struggled with especially as
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somebody who used to be quite like resentful was anger
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and one of the examples i genuinely think about quite a lot it's
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so simple and it's so obvious
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and yet it kind of like made clear a lot of
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behaviors i had where i was like oh okay like i'm
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frustrating myself for no reason at all It uses an example of a window
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and it's talking about how like it can be really frustrating Let's say like for example, I have this when I record these videos Sometimes there are people making
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so much noise in the street There is no need for this much noise to be made
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and I have my windows closed It's really hot in my room
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because the windows are closed and yet I can still hear them
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And I have to stop recording because it's just awful
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And I have to wait for the sound to be over
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before I can continue recording The book talks about two different ways
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that you can interpret a loud noise for example of a
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builder outside of your window Either the builder is hammering in order to annoy me, or the builder is hammering and I am annoyed.
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Two facts that don't have to be linked in this awful, very personal way, right?
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To calm us down in noisy streets, we should trust that those making a noise know nothing of us.
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We should place a fire guard between the noise outside and an internal sense of deserving punishment.
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We should not import into scenarios where they don't belong, pessimistic interpretations of others' motives.
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Thereafter, noise will never be pleasant, but it will not have to make us furious.
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all outdoors may be bedlam provided that there is no disturbance within i like
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when i first read that i was like oh wait
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that is such a nice way of looking at it and that is such an obvious way to look at it.
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And even now like even if I feel slight annoyance
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and noise outside I can just accept there is noise outside right now and I am annoyed.
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And I don't have to come up with this whole like I don't have to add more to it than there is.
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I don't have to make myself suffer even more unnecessarily
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because something for me is that I often will think I wish that there wasn't noise.
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I wish that there wasn't noise.
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And something that I find I do a lot, which I try really hard to like be aware of, is I often wish that I was in a different universe.
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That's just what kind of, I obviously didn't think of it that way before, that's just what I labelled these kinds of thoughts as.
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I would be frustrated because I wish that there was no noise outside because I want to keep recording.
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But right now, I'm in a universe in which there is noise outside and I've had to stop recording.
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And rather than just accepting that right now there is noise outside, I can take a break, I can maybe have a breather, I can go grab some water, I can just like I don't know just chill out for a moment
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or I can be a bit annoyed But I can just sit
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and be annoyed instead I wish that I was in a universe in
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which there was no noise outside But that universe does not exist.
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I am in the universe in which there is noise outside
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and this sounds really silly But it starts to be a lot stronger
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when you apply it to much more Frustrating big situations like for example someone letting you down really badly
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or like the example I gave earlier Like I find interpersonal conflict quite difficult
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and I was talking about like let's say I'm friends of someone who is doing something
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that I just kind of can't like stand for like I really can't stay in a relationship whilst that's happening
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if someone is expecting me to be a mind reader
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and is being really weird and like passive aggressive with me
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and I'm having to try to figure out why
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if let's say other than that trait I love that person
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so much I like them
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so much they are literally like the perfect bestest friend other than this trait
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but I know
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that this trait is like a deal breaker for me I could easily be really frustrated
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and be like why can't this person just communicate with me better i wish i was in a universe in
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which this person communicated better but they don't
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and i feel like once i started accepting situations for what they were
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and accepting the reality that i live in i either a chilled out
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and just accepted the situation for what it was without being
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as frustrated for example oh my goodness it's hammering outside
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and i can't do anything about it i can't go
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and tell the builders to stop
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that would be kind of horrible they're just trying to do their jobs they're also probably tired
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and just want to finish their jobs the same way i want to finish my job
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because i want to finish recording i just need to let it be for now
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and then i chill out and just like feel way better
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and fine or b i would have a clearer head
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and i'd be able to assess what it is that i want
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and what it is
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that i now feel like i'm able to do with the situation at hand for example i can't stand
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that this person is requiring me to be really hyper vigilant
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and really like guess their emotions i can't do that
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and even though i wish
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that it could be otherwise this is the the situation at hand
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and I know that that is a deal breaker for me
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so I'm going to approach them about it and
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if it doesn't get any better I'm just going to have
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to mentally take a bit of a step back in certain areas in the friendship
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and I'm able to do that with a lot more clarity
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and with less resistance because my wish is not clashing with this reality as much
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because I realize that this wish can't be fulfilled
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because I'm not in this alternate universe
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and I accept reality for what it is
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and therefore I am able to move in a way
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that it is kind of being pushed less against by reality because I'm moving in accordance with it if that makes sense.
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Another thing that I realized when I was kind of flicking through looking for
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that window example was this random little thing
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which actually is quite nice to read
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because I say this a lot in regards to anxiety and this is a little bit off topic.
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People often say like oh if you're anxious that like this awful situation
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that there's a small chance of happening it might not happen like it probably won't.
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I never found that to be helpful because then I would be like okay
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but I'm not anxious about the fact that it probably 100% is going to happen.
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I'm anxious because there is a chance that that situation will happen.
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And like, yeah, you're telling me like, oh, but it probably won't happen.
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I know it probably won't.
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That's not what I'm anxious about.
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And so that's why for me, just acceptance, that situation might happen.
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And I'm going to have to be okay.
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I trust that I will probably be able to figure out a way to be okay if it does.
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That for me works so much better.
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And in this book, it does say in the same chapter, but under the anxiety subcategory, but reassurance can be the cruelest antidote to anxiety.
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Our rosy predictions both leave the anxious unprepared for the worst
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and unwittingly imply that it would be disastrous if the worst came to pass.
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Seneca more wisely asks to consider that bad things probably will occur
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but adds they are unlikely ever to be as bad as we fear.
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Frustrating that if I was born before Seneca, right, you guys would be here quoting me but no, Seneca got to it first, Seneca lived first.
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I love the tweet or like the meme
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or whatever that's like okay like plato and aristotle
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if i was one of the first 10 people to have
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ever lived i probably would have come up with all
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that too that's how i feel reading that
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because that's what i have been saying i think i have a whole podcast about
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that but taking it further than that though i don't even think the argument
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that like oh
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but it probably won't be as bad as you expect it would be really works for me either
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because it's like but what
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if it is for me it's always like my anxieties always are like
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but what if but what if but what if everyone hates me what
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if this tragedy happens but what if all of this goes bad
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but all of that and i'm always catastrophizing
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so just accepting the bad thing might happen
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and Seneca it might happen just as badly as I predict it might happen even worse
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and what am I going to do with
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that I'm just going to have to be okay
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and just accepting like that might happen it might be really bad I might really suffer
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but I don't have to make my suffering worse by wishing
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it didn't happen by plotting how I'm going to prevent it from happening by being really controlling to my friends
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and being really controlling to the people around me
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and keeping an eye on everyone and making sure that nothing happens
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and being this like this like detective
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and this like weird like I don't know I was really like controlling
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and intense and I think that then
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that made it worse I was annoying to be friends with
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because I was so controlling and weird I also was suffering
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so much more than I needed to be
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because I was constantly like hunting for signs
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that everything was going to go wrong and everyone was going to leave me
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and nobody was going to love me I mean I think
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for me I've spoken about this in another podcast episode
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but like another thing that really helped around the time
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that I was getting into all these books and like reading about stoicism
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and acceptance and stuff is
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that guys i really like learned the hard way okay that's also why i'm like
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so passionately like please guys radically accept radically accept i learned the hard way
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because one of my biggest fears did happen one of my biggest biggest fears
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which i don't even want to talk about
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because it was such a rough time in my life i was
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so scared of something happening and then it all happened
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and not just
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that it happened worse than i could have ever imagined that's
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why seneca being like oh it probably won't be as bad as you think it will be.
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No, no, no, for me, it was so much worse.
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It was awful.
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And then it was fine.
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It was awful.
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Like, I don't want to understand how bad it was, but it then was okay.
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And it's like, okay, why did I also have to make myself feel
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so much worse by being stressed about that happening for so long and being constantly concerned that was going to happen?
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And also guys, this doesn't matter.
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Obviously this is irrelevant to the whole philosophy, but aside from that, I do think I brought it upon myself.
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I think that thing partly happened because I was such a weird controlling person who like constantly had to have, like, I don't know, had to make sure
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that nothing was going out of plan to my plan
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and only my feelings mattered and like I don't know
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because of that all of these awful things happened
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and I was like oh okay like
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so there was no need for me to first of all bring this upon myself by being really intense
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and really really anxious there was also no need for me to have like extremely extremely intense anxiety for years
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and have to spend so much time in therapy
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and like all of this like there was no need there was no need
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and I know obviously it's
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so much easier said than done I feel like I threw a lot of therapy
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and like inner work
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and I don't know just like really becoming a very healthy
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person I feel like I have quite a large amount of not control over my emotions
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because obviously like
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if anything I used to over-intellectualize my emotions like I allow my emotions to kind of be what they are
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but I do think I'm quite good at understanding how to
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kind of like my emotions are quite malleable I feel
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and I think when I'm kind of getting into a bad place
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or I'm getting anxious I know the things to tell myself
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and the things to do to bring me out
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that quite quickly I think it's easy for me nowadays to be like oh well just don't be anxious
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because I know how to not be anxious anymore and I know that it's a lot easier said than done.
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I think if anyone had told me this when I was really anxious, I'd be like, that sounds great that you're able to do that.
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But I don't think I am.
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With practice, I really feel like I would have been able to if I had been told about this earlier.
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It just would have taken a lot of internal work and a lot of practice.
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But guys, please, like, I promise you, the radical acceptance stuff is so helpful.
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I keep bringing up interpersonal examples because I think that is the root of a lot that I was anxious about.
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It was a lot about, like, everyone's gonna leave me and everybody secretly hates me
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and it's funny
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because now like sometimes i do have flashes sometimes i really
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do have flashes of like oh nobody loves me in this world
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and all my friends actually secretly hate me
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but then i'm able to just like laugh it off
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because it's like okay a again aside from the philosophy whatever
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that is like so like i don't think my friends are thinking of me
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that much like i'm really like not that loved and
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that everybody is plotting against me secretly and like secretly hates me
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and it's like all planning to leave me i am really not like the main character of everybody's lives in that way.
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I don't think my friends think about me enough.
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Even people who don't like me, I don't think anyone's like plotting against me and like is like taking me down because they hate me.
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I don't think people who don't like me really think about me ever
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and if they do it's probably like for a moment and then they move on to thinking about their own lives.
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But also even if that were the case I would have to be fine and it's also so frustrating.
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It's like I've been through so much worse.
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I've been through really hard things in life and I've been okay
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and I'm literally so happy and also everything ended up all right
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and I learned more about myself along the way
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and I like you know lots of other positives came from it this was all inspired by the fact
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that I was thinking about
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that interaction with the friend where she was like oh that's really annoying
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that people do this
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and I was like I do this is this secretly actually a like weird suggestion
422
that I shouldn't be doing that anymore
423
but like again just make it clear it's not like anything
424
that was actually wrong it's just like a specific trait
425
that she finds annoying but that isn't actually a bad trait or anything
426
and then I was like wait that's literally not what she
427
said though like that's literally not what she said I'm imagining
428
that she's like got this whole secret other story that didn't happen.
429
All she said was that she finds it annoying and
430
if I just accept oh she's annoyed right now and I don't have to do anything about that I can just listen.
431
I don't have to change.
432
She's not asking me to change.
433
There's no problem.
434
She can be annoyed and I can be the person
435
that I am and if she wants me to change then we can talk about it.
436
She's never brought it up again.
437
I don't think she really cared that much.
438
She was just talking about something.
439
I feel like again this is one of those things
440
that like I think
441
because the examples our user quite light it doesn't sound it sounds very silly
442
but i promise like i have applied this in my life
443
to much bigger more horrible more like really really just like awful things
444
and it's really helped it's helped a lot and again also like
445
that doesn't mean that you shouldn't strive to have a better life
446
if you feel that you are able to do things to bring
447
that about but it helps to have a clearer mind to be able to bring
448
that about in a way that isn't clashing with reality as much
449
and also sometimes you can't sometimes you can't change things for
450
example i can't go tell the builders to stop hammering
451
because it's their job and i also can't change certain things
452
that have happened in my life already
453
that have been horrible i can't change i mean again my secret health issues
454
that i said i don't want to talk about
455
but i mentioned in every episode for a long time i was like this isn't fair it's not fair
456
that other people don't have this yeah it is unfair anyways i just have to accept
457
that it is unfair and it is annoying
458
and i am going to have to just learn to be okay with it
459
because there is nothing else
460
that can be done about it i need to stop wishing to be in an alternate universe in
461
which i don't have health issues because that universe doesn't exist
462
and if it does i don't know about parallel universes even
463
if it does exist i'm not there right now i'm in
464
the one where i do have health issues i'm in the one where there's loads of loud noises outside
465
when i'm trying to record youtube videos i'm in the one where potentially maybe my friends hate me
466
and i can't change universes so i just have to accept them
467
and if i keep wishing to change universes and
468
if i keep wishing
469
that i was in the other universe instead of just dealing with the lot
470
that i've been given then i'm going to be much more frustrated
471
and i'm also probably going to struggle bringing about change in a way that is realistic anyways thank you guys for watching.
472
I feel like that was a little bit all over the place because I didn't plan this episode.
473
I just like had that thought in the night and then I was like, I have to record, I have to record, I have to speak to them.
474
So I hope that this has been somewhat helpful and I also hope that that made sense.
475
As usual, thank you so much for watching.
476
Please like this video if you like this video.
477
Please subscribe if you haven't already.
478
I love doing podcasts and videos where I talk like this.
479
I also do vlogs.
480
I also talk about books.
481
I talk about journaling
482
and I also have a monthly favorites video series where i talk about all the things
483
that i loved in the month i try not to fix at all on like products i bought
484
or things like that i just try to focus on the lovely experiences
485
that i had being alive in the previous month so please subscribe
486
if you feel like that could be helpful or interesting
487
or of any benefit to you whatsoever please comment
488
and let me know if you have any thoughts at all i'm really curious
489
if this is something that like you've heard of before
490
or something that you do or if this is something
491
that you don't do and you don't think would be helpful
492
if you disagree then please let me know as well
493
because again this is just help my particular anxiety
494
but like with other people this might not help at all
495
and also once again sorry for the people who have been
496
asking for a silky rose 3 vlog i there it is
497
coming it is coming i was gonna record one this weekend
498
but there's another heat wave coming
499
so like there's nothing to record to be honest i'm just
500
gonna be led with like the fan directly on my body for days
501
so maybe the vlog will be the week after anyways thank you
502
so much for watching and i'll see you guys soon bye bye
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אוצר מילים והערות הגייה לשיעור הזה
שיעור הדיבור הזה ברמה B1 מבוסס על הסרטון “you are creating your own suffering”. בסרטון הזה יש 502 משפטים ו-6289 מילים לתרגול Shadowing. הדיבור נמשך 25:31. הדובר מדבר מהר, כ-246 מילים בדקה, אז צפו לצלילים מחוברים ומקוצרים. 83% מהמילים נמצאות בין 3,000 המילים הנפוצות ביותר באנגלית; כדאי ללמוד את השאר לפני שמתחילים.
אוצר מילים מרכזי בסרטון הזה
15 המילים המתקדמות ביותר בסרטון, עם ההגייה והמשמעות שלהן:
| מילה | הגייה | משמעות |
|---|---|---|
| annoy פועל | /əˈnoɪ̯/ | הֵצִיק |
| frustrate פועל | /ˈfɹʌsˌtɹeɪt/ | תִּסְכֵּל |
| anxious שם תואר | /ˈæŋkʃəs/ | חָרֵד |
| emotion שם עצם | /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/ | רֶגֶשׁ |
| annoyance שם עצם | /əˈnɔɪ.əns/ | הֲצָקָה |
| trait שם עצם | /tɹeɪt/ | מאפיין, תכונה |
| builder שם עצם | /ˈbɪl.dəɹ/ | בַּנַּאי |
| frustration שם עצם | /fɹʌsˈtɹeɪ.ʃən/ | תסכול |
| podcast שם עצם | /ˈpɑdˌkæst/ | פּוֹדְקַאסְט, הֶסְכֵּת |
| hammer שם עצם | /ˈhæmɚ/ | פַּטִּישׁ |
| philosopher שם עצם | /fəˈlɑsəfɚ/ | פִילוֹסוֹף, הוֹגֵה דֵּעוֹת |
| subscribe פועל | /səbˈskɹaɪb/ | נִמְנָה |
| boundary שם עצם | /ˈbaʊndɹi/ | גְּבוּל |
| detective שם עצם | /dɪˈtɛktɪv/ | בַּלָּשׁ, בַּלָּשִׁית |
| weaken פועל | /ˈwikən/ | החליש |
Phrasal verbs שתשמעו
| מילה | משמעות |
|---|---|
| figure out פועל | הֵבִין, מצא תשובה |
| grow up פועל | גָּדַל |
משפטים שכדאי לחזור עליהם
משפטים קצרים ושלמים מהסרטון שאפשר להשתמש בהם בשיחה יומיומית:
- If you've been missing that, that will come soon.
- I'm just unable to handle indirect communication.
- I wish that there wasn't noise.
- I know it probably won't.
- That's not what I'm anxious about.
דקדוק בסרטון הזה
המבנים שהדובר משתמש בהם הכי הרבה, עם המילים המדויקות מהסרטון:
| מבנה | בסרטון |
|---|---|
| הווה מושלם ממושך (Present perfect continuous) have/has been + -ing — פעולה שהתחילה בעבר ועדיין נמשכת עכשיו | have been missing · you've been missing · have been saying |
| משפטי תנאי (Conditional sentences) if + clause, will/would + verb — תנאי ותוצאה שלו | If you've been missing that, that will come · if that continues I'd probably |
| “Used to” used to + verb — הרגל או מצב שהיה נכון בעבר וכבר לא קיים | used to think · used to be |
| הווה מושלם (Present perfect) have/has + past participle — פעולה שקרתה בעבר ועדיין יש לה חשיבות או השפעה עכשיו | I've just had · has been · I've been |
הגייה ששווה לשים לב אליה
הדובר משתמש ב-206 קיצורים וצורות מקוצרות, כמו don't, I'm, can't. אמרו אותם בצורה הקצרה, כפי שאתם שומעים אותם.
- הצלילים של “sh” ו-“zh”: anxious /ˈæŋkʃəs/, emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, frustration /fɹʌsˈtɹeɪ.ʃən/, limitation /lɪmɪˈteɪʃən/, clash /ˈklæʃ/
- מילים ארוכות — שימו לב להטעמה: communicate /kəˈmjuːnɪkeɪt/, indirectly /ˌɪn.dɪˈɹɛk(t).li/, limitation /lɪmɪˈteɪʃən/, philosopher /fəˈlɑsəfɚ/, adamantine /ˌædəˈmænˌtaɪn/
צלילים שדוברי עברית מתקשים בהם:
- /w/ — שפתיים מעוגלות, לא /v/: anyways /ˈɛn.iˌweɪz/, weaken /ˈwikən/, wisely /ˈwaɪzli/, whoa /woʊ/, whatsoever /ˌ(h)wʌtsoʊˈɛvɚ/
- /æ/ — פתוח יותר מה-“אֶ” העברית, לא כמו “a” ב-“cup”: anxious /ˈæŋkʃəs/, radical /ˈɹædɪkəl/, podcast /ˈpɑdˌkæst/, hammer /ˈhæmɚ/, antidote /ˈæn.tɪ.doʊt/
- /r/ — הלשון לא נוגעת בשום מקום, לא ה-“ר” הגרונית: frustrate /ˈfɹʌsˌtɹeɪt/, radical /ˈɹædɪkəl/, secretly /ˈsiː.kɹɪt.li/, trait /tɹeɪt/, builder /ˈbɪl.dəɹ/
איך לתרגל עם הסרטון הזה
- הקשיבו לכל הסרטון פעם אחת בלי לדבר, ורשמו את המילים שאתם לא מכירים.
- התחילו במהירות 0.75×, תרגלו Shadowing משפט אחר משפט, וחזרו למהירות רגילה כשזה מרגיש קל.
- הקליטו את עצמכם והשוו למקור, תוך תשומת לב למילים כמו annoy, frustrate, anxious.
מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?
שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.