Shadowing Practice: How To Detach & Love Being Alone - Learn English Speaking with YouTube

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Hi guys, welcome to or welcome back to my channel.

Before we get into today's video,

I just wanna say a massive thank you to Siga Design for sponsoring today's video.

I have been wanting a cute watch.

I feel like watches look really good with winter fashion and we're getting into a new season out here in Australia.

We actually have winter here in Australia, June, July, August.

So we're changing seasons, we're changing fashion and I've been wanting a cute watch.

For those of you guys that watch me on YouTube,

you know that I love wearing white.

So I wanted a white watch that would go with a lot of my outfits.

This would be a really good gift to give someone,

your mom, a friend, your boyfriend.

Spoil your man, spoil yourself.

There are so many different watches on the website.

They have very classy and unique designs.

Okay, so the watch that I'm going to unbox is the SIGA Design Watch Series R Denmark Rose.

So let's open it.

Oh my gosh, so I think that I get a necklace with the watch.

Love that, that'll go with my watch.

Okay, so let's unbox the watch together.

Look at the quality.

It just looks like such good quality.

Also, this box is beautiful I really love that the strap is

so thin So i'm about to go out for date night

and I just thought that I would Show you guys how I style my sega design pieces.

I'm wearing the necklace here I think it's so cute

and i'm also wearing the watch here It looks so stunning and it looks so good with my outfit.

I'm wearing a long black

maxi dress and I'm going to put a black coat on top

and I wanted to keep it simple and not have any other jewelry on

so I'm wearing a long maxi dress and I'm going to put on this coat.

This is a very energy coat.

So yeah I absolutely love what this looks like.

I just wanted to show you guys the watch is so beautiful.

I absolutely love it and yeah I'm ready to go out for date night.

Siga is the first Chinese original designer watch brand with products emphasizing modern mechanical art aesthetics.

It is the Chinese watch brand with the most international design awards with a total of 17 awards.

Each Danish rose includes an exclusively designed rose necklace adorned with an original Swarovski crystal.

Also it's waterproof so no need to worry about hand washing or water splashing.

So yeah if you guys are interested and you want to get yourself

or somebody else a gift from SIGA Design all of the information will be linked in my description below.

You can go ahead and check out the website they have something for everybody there.

They have some really unique and timeless watches.

I definitely recommend that you guys go check them out.

Thank you so much to Sika Design for sponsoring today's video.

And I hope you guys like the video.

So I'm literally staying in the middle of nowhere.

I'm going to insert some clips.

So you guys are probably thinking,

what are you doing in the middle of nowhere in a cabin?

My friend and I wanted to get the hell away from everything for a little bit.

I feel like I've been needing this.

We've been talking about it.

It's this little cabin called Unyoked.

It's like a little tiny home, like a tiny cabin.

And I just thought it would be nice for us to get away we love this kind of shit anyway

and this video is basically a pep talk on how to

be comfortable being alone i thought what better time to film this than

when i'm away at a cabin in the middle of nowhere

except i'm not actually alone alone i am with my friend

but still we both individually live alone

so we're having a really great talk about you know what it means to be alone how to be alone

and how to actually be happy being alone this is a skill

that not many people really master i feel like i am somebody

that genuinely in my everyday life not even just on YouTube in my everyday life is really comfortable being on my own.

And so I wrote some notes down and I'm going to talk about it.

Honestly, even though I've been so on the go,

my mental health has never been better.

Like I have never felt so good.

Maybe this is just the way I am because

when I was young I lived in Dubai and I've moved countries

and I've moved cities and schools

and houses I've never really lived in a house for longer than three years

which if you think about it is a lot of moving

and I'm starting to understand myself a bit better and understand

that I feel like I need change I don't think I'm

running away from things I feel like I can understand why

people in my life see it as like luma you're going

away again like you're running away from things i just think

that i crave change i love being out of my comfort

zone i'm comfortable being alone you know i just crave being away like right now i feel great it feels

so good to be away from all the bullshit i feel detached from things

when i'm away like this so my mental health has been really amazing

and i like filming videos like this when i'm feeling good

because the last thing i want to be on my channel is fake.

I like to be genuine.

I feel like that's who I am and yeah I've just been feeling really good right now.

I've been feeling really independent,

really good, really comfortable on my own.

I'm not coming to you from a place of like you need to get better,

you need to get like me.

I too was once in that space where I wasn't comfortable being alone

so much to the point where I wouldn't even go eat on my own.

Like the thought of eating on my own

or going to the movies on my own was just like why would anybody do that?

I didn't think it was in me to be the type of person

that would ever live alone or be comfortable traveling alone

or just I just didn't think

that was a part of who I would be I understand

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that fear of being alone and the fear of letting go of somebody

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or letting go of something because you're afraid of the alternative

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which is being alone in this world

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which is having your own back not having anybody there for you

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when I went through a really public breakup

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that a lot of you guys have watched and know about

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or if you haven't there's a video on my channel where I'm going through a breakup

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and a lot of my videos now are based around finding confidence,

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being alone, being independent and that is because

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that experience was the biggest wake-up call of my life because I relied heavily on living with somebody and being with somebody.

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I was never really alone.

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I never really needed to be alone but going through that

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and now living alone and being very picky with who I give my energy to,

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who I am friends with,

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everything has taught me so much about life it's been the biggest lesson for me

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and i'm so thankful that i've gone through this

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because i cannot imagine my life moving forward always relying on somebody i've traveled

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so many places i've moved cities things will just continue to get better

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and better

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because i now understand the importance of being alone look i'm not perfect okay i just want to say

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that i feel like the downfall of being alone all the time is

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that you kind of get in your head

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and no one is really there to pull you out of it

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and to say snap out of it you're really overthinking this

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now i feel like i've started to introduce you know friends into my life

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and just kind of like doing things a lot more with people

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but it was really like me on my own for a

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minute there i spent almost a year just kind of like

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most of the time being alone like i would go weeks on end just facetiming friends

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and everything but sitting alone in my house

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and running errands doing everything on my own does this mean

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because i am good at being alone

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that i'm better than everybody else no does this mean

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that i don't feel emotional or anxious or depressed no not at all

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but i have a good thing going i think where i

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understand my emotions i welcome them i know how to go

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through the waves of life better i feel like living alone has taught me

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that i sort of stopped chasing things i got to the

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point in my life where i was like i'm done chasing

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things i've done chasing people relationships friends i'm done chasing things

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that might not even really be that good for me but i'm chasing it and i'm grabbing because what's the alternative?

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Being alone.

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And I don't want to be alone,

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so I would rather settle for these relationships that I shouldn't even be entertaining,

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but I would do it because I didn't want to be alone.

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I decided to stop all of that.

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You need to stop worrying.

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You need to stop chasing.

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Let's affirm something together.

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Okay.

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When I say let's affirm something together,

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it means I'm going to say something.

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I want you to feel it.

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I want you to believe it.

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You can even say it with me if you want.

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Things come to me with ease.

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My life is incredible and it's only going to get better

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and rough patches teach me things my growth will lead me to greater things

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let's affirm that together real quick i know a lot of you may be clicking on this video

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because you want to learn to perhaps detach from a specific person right maybe you got out of a relationship

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and you want to detach from that or maybe you're just feeling really lost

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and you want to let go of things

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and just sort of like live life the way

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that we're supposed to live it

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which is in the moment you know riding the wave

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and you're just gonna have to accept that and be okay with it.

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Maybe you've come here and you're sitting with me right now listening to this video

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because things aren't really the way that you would like them to be

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and you feel lost and you feel stressed

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and you feel like you're not comfortable with how things are going and that's okay to be like that.

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You know how I just mentioned that I moved cities?

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I'm going to open up to you about something.

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I'm going to insert this picture here.

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This is my first night sleeping alone moving cities.

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I was so uncomfortable

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and I was really like upset with myself as well for a little bit then

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because I thought I should be comfortable I was anticipating this I knew it would be different I knew

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that I would have growing pains moving cities even though I was sad even though I was crying

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and I was having a whole panic attack

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and I didn't want to be alone and I felt stressed

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that I had moved cities I still sort of even in

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the thick of it knew this is gonna pass this too shall pass

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because everything always gets better and these are just growing pains

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and I'm gonna be okay I don't think that you can just switch to being okay on your own straight away.

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It's not just like a thing that happens within a week.

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There's a transition phase, sort of like growing pains like I talked about.

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This phase is uncomfortable but everything that is uncomfortable,

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everything that is on the other side of our comfort zone,

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on the other side of fear, is worth having.

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When I think about me,

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Luma, and everything that sets me apart from other people like my YouTube channel,

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these are all things that are on the other side of my comfort zone.

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I wouldn't have anything that I'm proud of today without stepping out of my comfort zone

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that doesn't mean that it's easy for me to do

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that doesn't mean

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that i want to do it i'm in the same exact position as you guys you know there's still

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so many things i want to do i feel like i'm at the very beginning of my career

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and of my life and there's just so much

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that i want to do but it's

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so much better to put yourself out there and try things

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and be on your own

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and do new things travel move out by yourself whatever it may be

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because you're one step closer to achieving something great in

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that new experience and if you don't do any of

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that then it is just your loss it's like the same

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thing as okay example i don't really like roller coasters

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but i go on them

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and i'll explain to you why this is usually you meet people

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and they're like i love roller coasters then there's those people

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that don't really like that stuff and i am one of those people

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but i always go on the roller coasters

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because i think okay i could just sit here and and be comfortable or I could do it,

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it might not be that bad.

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And I have that great experience that I've just shared with my friends and I've stepped out of my comfort zone.

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I've done something different.

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And it's just little things like that that I do,

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I apply towards everything in my life because just like I got on the roller coaster,

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I also decide to book flights that I'm scared to book or do things that I'm scared to do.

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Start a YouTube channel, start a brand.

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You know, it's like a snowball effect.

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Once you start doing little things like that,

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you get better at it.

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You know, once you start doing things on your own

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that you used to do with one person that you were once dating or living with or whatever or best friends with,

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you start doing them on your own,

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you can start doing so many other things on your own.

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And so many other opportunities and people will come into your life when you put yourself out there like that.

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Some people force themselves to hang out with people that they don't really like because they're terrified of being alone.

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Some people force themselves to date people that aren't meant for them

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because they are afraid to be alone but you don't know

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that you don't need it until you've lived your life without it

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and that's why when people are so heartbroken

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and they come to me for advice and they're like do you believe

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that i could ever get back with this person how do

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i get this person back in my head i'm thinking you

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know there is such thing as people getting back together

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but baby this is not happening to you it's happening for you

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because whether you get back together with this person

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or you find somebody even greater which i'm sure is going to happen right?

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Because the universe always has a plan for you.

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You know, getting over your addiction of having that comfort,

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it's so much easier said than done,

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but that is going to set you free.

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And that's what sets you apart.

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And that is going to be the beginning of the best phase of your life.

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There's actually this quote that my friend Mesker shot to you, Mesker.

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There's this quote that he told me earlier,

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a ship in a harbor is safe,

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but a ship wasn't built to sit in a harbor.

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We as humans are built to withstand change.

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You are built to withstand change.

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Believe it.

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If you are uncomfortable with change,

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then you are going to be uncomfortable for the rest of your life.

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So this might feel right now like you are going through such a uncomfortable period.

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You don't know where life is going.

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That's okay.

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When I moved to Australia,

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because I used to live in Dubai and I've moved around a lot,

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a lot of my schoolmates and everything would be like,

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you just move around a lot.

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Like, do you hate that you don't have one specific home?

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And for a while I did.

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I think it's beautiful to have a home and like a base

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but i don't know i sort of accepted it everybody's different

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and i feel like this is my life guess i just wasn't meant to have

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that but i kind of love that

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because i'm not attached to anything you are supposed to change

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and grow and like i always say you guys have heard this a million times

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if you watch me a lot the world is an all-you-can-eat buffet there's

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so much out there for you

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if you sit here in comfort holding on to things

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and you don't trust the universe is going to bring you better things you will never expand

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and that's why you need to let go.

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Being on your own gives you the silence to learn about yourself.

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Those people that never take the time to figure themselves out will have other people tell them who they are.

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You know what I mean?

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You know yourself.

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You have a calling in your soul.

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You know what you're supposed to do in this life.

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If you sit there and you listen to it

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and you trust your gut and you trust that you can do this on your own,

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you can do everything on your own,

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you will become so strong and you'll actually be able to weed out people

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that don't serve you really easily

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because it's like I feel more comfortable being alone than i feel

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when i'm with you

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so why would i invite you to be a part of

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my life there are going to be phases in your life where you're going through change

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and you are going through difficult times

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and just transitional phases where things might be just crazy

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and life just feels like it's taking a really unexpected turn

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and in those phases what's going to get you through it is it your boyfriend

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or your girlfriend your family your friends maybe they might help a bit

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but ultimately it is you you are the one who is going to make the change

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and who has the key to everything to you living your

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best life it is you being comfortable being alone you've got

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this okay i love you guys i hope you liked my

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little pep talk in this cabin it's getting dark now

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so i'm gonna go hang out with my friend

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but yeah i hope you guys like this pep talk

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and i will be back very soon next week with another video i love you guys

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Shadowing Practice: How To Detach & Love Being Alone - Learn English Speaking with YouTube

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Shadowing Practice: How To Detach & Love Being Alone - Learn English Speaking with YouTube

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About This Lesson

Key Vocabulary & Phrases

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What is the Shadowing Technique?