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beware the man whose handwriting sways like a reed in the wind this is a talk about hands

and handwriting i think of handwriting as a way to organize

thought into shapes i like shapes i like organizing them but

because of recent neurological changes in my brain i find shapes

fall apart on me my responsibility to forms cannot be properly fulfilled

so i present this talk in its falling apart form in the hope that it's not unintelligible or depressing part one hands

in order to right away avoid being depressing and

because beginnings are important i'll begin with a poem of the

roman poet catullus who lived in the first century bc and died at the age of 30.

he was himself the beginning of the roman lyric poetry tradition

and this is fragment 46 his poem invoking the beginning of spring In Latin,

the first part of the poem is Now spring unlocks,

now the equinox Stops its blue rages, quiet as pages I tell you,

Catullus, leave Troy, leave the ground burning They did Look,

we will change everything all the meanings all the clear cities of Asia you

and me now the mind isn't she an avid previous hobo now the feet grow leaves

so so glad to see whose green baits awaits oh sweet don't go back the same way go a new way

catullus was perhaps the favorite poet of a painter named cy twombly about whom i'll say more in a minute

twombly was a painter who used a lot of handwriting on his canvases

critics were provoked by this and roland bart wrote an essay about it in his responsibility of forms

how to draw a line that is not stupid is a question he asks at the beginning of this essay

how to draw a line that is not stupid isn't this one of our big problems as humans

whether i am me or whether i am hitler

or whether i am william von humboldt it is a problem of human life so let's start with life your life

There it is before you, possibly a road, a ribbon, a dotted line, a map.

Let's say you're 25.

Then you make some decisions, do things, have setbacks, have triumphs, become someone, a bus driver, a professor, a pirate.

Years pass, maybe in a family, maybe not, maybe happy, maybe not.

then one day you wake up

and you're 70 looking ahead you see a black doorway you

begin to notice the black doorway is always there at the edge whether you look at it

or not most moments contain it most moments have a sort

of sediment of black doorway at the bottom of the glass

you wonder

if other people are seeing it too you ask them they

say no you ask why no one can tell you a

minute ago you were 25 then you went ahead getting the

life you want one day you glanced over from 25 to now

and there it is the doorway black and waiting

when I was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease a symptom particularly mortifying to me was that my handwriting disintegrated

i had used to take pleasure in writing in notebooks shelves

of them day after day year after year now the upright strokes bend or break or go in all directions

vowels shrink to blobs slant loses its smooth smart angle it all looks just embarrassing Or Roland Barthes would say stupid.

I scrub out whole paragraphs in shame.

hard to describe

or explain the shame of bad handwriting bad handwriting is ugly it looks sort of stupid

and i was going to say it feels inauthentic

but then realized the opposite is the case in its badness my chaotic handwriting seems to reveal something about me

that i would rather not look at.

It carries what Gerard Manley Hopkins calls the inscape out.

Beware the man whose writing sways like a reed in the wind, said Confucius.

Graphology, as I'm sure you know, is the study of handwriting as a clue to character analysis.

Hard to believe it isn't a good clue.

If my script slants to the right i am a person strongly influenced by my father

if i am a procrastinator i dot my eyes to the left

if i am hitler i have a very very very tiny script

and dot my eyes with a slash mark

and here is an interesting incidental fact about hands

when a person who has been paralyzed from the neck down is given a tool

that allows them to write with their mouth They reproduce the same handwriting style as they had before paralysis.

Your handwriting is your brain, and your brain is you.

But Parkinson's disease messes with all that.

It turns off certain genes in the cells of the brain, no one knows why.

This leads to decreased levels of a brain chemical called dopamine and to unusual electrical rhythms.

many physical actions are inhibited or mangled like brushing one's teeth

or writing with the hand

but scriptural disintegration is just an image of the beginning of

a cognitive breakdown whose gradual effects will include disorder discontinuity forgetting gaps and fissures slowdowns, and stops.

Here is a medical explanation of what's happening.

This is from a book called The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge.

Each cell in our body contains all our genes, but not all those genes are turned on or expressed.

When a gene is turned on, it makes a new protein that alters the structure and function of the cell.

This is called the transcription function because when the gene is turned on,

information about how to make these proteins is transcribed or read from the individual gene.

What I take from this is that the brain has its own handwriting, which depends on a certain protein.

I can imagine my poor brain throwing up its hands in dismay to find all the good handwriting protein gone

or piled in the corner in a mess.

How to draw a line that is not stupid.

When critics talk about the late style of Beethoven or Baudelaire, I wonder do they mean marks on paper as well as,

or as a clue to, hauntings in the brain.

Here we enter the shatter zone, hands within hands.

Metabolic and metaphorical vectors overlap.

Is this confusing?

Yes, it is confusing.

In the history of art, late works are the catastrophes, said Theodore Adorno famously in his essays on music.

as i am not keen on considering myself a catastrophe let's

turn from late style to early style the world's earliest writing systems developed independently in three places

the near east china and mexico all three began as systems of counting or accounting

a way to keep track of goods or money later that is thousands of years later

A concern for the afterlife paved the way to literature by using writing for funerary inscriptions.

Death and property, you could say, two of our most basic anxieties,

seemed able to be managed or at least placated by putting marks on a surface,

and so inspired the first systematic mark -making, the first writing.

The psychology of one particular moment in this evolution interests me, the moment of transition from the realm of material things,

goods or money, to that of words and ideas, poems about death.

Let's take ourselves back to 3500 BC and to the kingdom of the Sumerians, present -day Iraq.

here people kept track of debts by counting out clay tokens and placing them in a clay envelope

to simplify matters some accountants began marking the outside of the

clay envelope to signify the number of tokens inside presumably the

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number of tokens inside the envelope would be exactly the same as the number of marks on the outside

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but what if it wasn't might there be room here for mistakenness

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or even duplicity at any rate

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when the outside does not match the inside things may be going

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or have gone awry that boundary is not so simple it's possible i am overthinking this imaginary moment of early scripture

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But it fascinates me how introducing a dialectic of inside

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and outside polarizes the attributes of each and may so easily slide sideways into judgments of right and wrong, good or bad.

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So let's be a little more subtle about the problem of bad handwriting.

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It would seem to have two possible solutions one perfect its craft

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so that the handwriting is not bad two disown the craft so

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that the badness doesn't matter examples john keats in his manuscripts

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would be an example of the first way the way of perfection

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when publishing a volume of poems keats copied out the text in a hand

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so regular flowing and confident it's hard to believe the writer ever had a moment of doubt or despair

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at any point in the composition of the lines keats was a romantic as an artist much concerned with self

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and selfhood the sheer beauty of his fair copies seems a revelation

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if not a celebration of what he considers his own best self At the other end of the spectrum,

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consider the 20th century artist Cy Twombly, whose modernist conception of self and selfhood was quite different than Keith's.

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Born in Lexington, Virginia, 1928, Cy Twombly was once declared by Artforum magazine to be the

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greatest American painter of the 20th century he loved books his

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inspiration was often literary his paintings feature handwritten words inscribed in

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such a way as to avoid offering any clues to himself

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or his character or his inside state scribbled scrawled gauche idle unlovely the hand is no one's

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or everyone's or mythic or just a stain left behind by something written before.

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You cannot get away from yourself in your own hand, I used to think, but then Cy Twombly does.

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In his essay on Twombly, Roland Barthes describes his handwriting as drifting between desire and politeness,

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or, quoting the Tao Te Ching, the hand of a man acting without expectation.

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how to draw a line that is not stupid like certain other artists of the modern era

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twombly seems to have been intent on leaving the self behind evading the ego and its marks

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positing emptiness as more interesting than presence

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twombly was best friends with john cage the well -known composer of 433 and other ego emptying artworks.

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As Cage put it, something has to be done to rid us of our memories and choices.

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What John Cage did was to introduce chance operations into his work.

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What Cy Twombly did was to find his way to a handwriting that has no person in it.

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Critics sometimes referred to Twombly's line as graffiti -like.

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I don't think Twombly enjoyed hearing this.

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Graffiti is often ugly and usually, at some level, activist.

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Its character is that of the egotistical sublime, as Keats said of Wordsworth.

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I once asked artist Tacita Dean about Twombly's attitude to all this.

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She was a friend of his.

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She came to know him very well while making a film about him and she said,

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For Sai, I always believed it was about the encounter and a bit like a medium with a Ouija board.

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When he's in the moment, he cannot be interrupted, even by himself, or the connection is broken.

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When he's in the moment, the encounter becomes the painting and nothing else matters.

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this moment is one

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that Roland Barthes locates inside Twombly's handwriting Barthes remarks on the

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lightness of Twombly's line his impulse to quote link in a single state what appears

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and what disappears not to separate the exaltation of life from the fear of death but to produce a single affect,

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neither eros nor thanatos, but life -death in a single thought,

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a single gesture." And here is an interesting incidental fact about exaltation.

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When a Twombly painting called Farewell Catullus to the Shores of

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Asia Minor was exhibited in Houston a few years ago a

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guard found a french woman standing in front of the canvas totally unclothed

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that painting makes me want to run naked she wrote in the guest book

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twombly was delighted no one can top that he said to the new york times

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well let's perk ourselves up here with a random homonym and another brief poetic interlude

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once i lived sorry once i lived in los angeles for a

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while and i had a friend from mexico a composer

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whose ambition in life was to compose an entire symphony out of the sound of people sighing His name was Guillermo.

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Guillermo's Sigh Symphony. Do you hear sighing?

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Do you wake amid a sigh?

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Radio sighs AM, FM.

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Short wave sighs crackle in from the Atlantic.

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Hot sighs steam in the dawn.

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people kissing stop to sigh then kiss again doctors sigh into wounds

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and the bloodstream is changed forever flowers sigh and two noon bees float backwards is it doubt is it disappointment

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the world didn't owe me anything leaves come sighing in the door bits of girls sigh like men Forgery sigh twice

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Balthus sighs and lies about it Claiming it was Byron's sigh A sigh may come too late Is it better than screaming?

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Give me all your sighs for four or five dollars

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A sigh is weightless Yet it may interrupt the broadcast Can you abstain?

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What is that hush that carries itself up each sigh?

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we hunt together the sigh

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and I sport of kings to want to stop is beyond

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us the more sighs shine the more I'm in trouble some

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kind of silvery stuff you thought it was the sea part

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two tremor tremor what is it uncontrollable shaking of a limb identified by the english surgeon

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and apothecary james parkinson in 1817 as one of the first

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symptoms noticeable in people suffering what he called the shaking palsy before

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that we find mention of a shaking disease in an ayurvedic treatise from 10th century bc india

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and galen the ancient Greek doctor, noticed an affliction he called skelaturbe,

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which might be charmingly translated as revelry of limbs.

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But it was not until the 20th century

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that neurologists came to think this revelry could be quieted by physical and mental action.

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That is, by physical exercise focused with deliberate and intense mental attention.

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If the brain is plastic, as we now believe it is, it can be changed.

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Certain activities can rewire it, by generating new neurons to replace lost ones,

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or by exciting neurons that have gone idle or slow.

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Boxing is recommended.

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Its combination of difficult cardiovascular effort

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and deliberate focusing of the mind has proven to reduce the symptoms and slow the progress of the disease.

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Body and brain work together.

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Do you ever wonder what it's like inside the brain?

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Is it a noisy workroom or a silent laboratory?

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what does a sound sound like in there

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myself I imagine it as a big boardroom with CEOs sitting around staring at their phones

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and sending one another texts

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and the spookiest part of this would be presumably they're all

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there sitting in the total dark it would be dark inside the brain wouldn't it where would light come from

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and who would see it anyway going back to trimmer i brush my teeth with my right arm

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and right hand where i have a trimmer the toothbrush therefore goes whamming up

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and down at a savage pace colliding with lips

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and gums this revelry of toothbrush is produced by electricity flowing along a nerve path path.

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But a nerve path has a plane of action.

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If I concentrate and change the plane by moving my arm up or down at an eccentric angle, I can interrupt the flow and still the tremor.

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Or if I grip the toothbrush handle really tight, I can master the shaking by intensity of focus.

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Concentration is key.

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I have to think into the motion.

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In my own brutal understanding of it, thinking makes neurons, or makes neurons move.

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A man named John D.

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Pepper has made a similar discovery in managing his problems walking

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this gentleman born london 1938 now living in cape town is a bit of a hero

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or at least a significant innovator in the parkinson's community he

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addresses his problems with walking by walking 15 miles a week

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in three sessions of five miles each at a pace of

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four miles per hour four miles per hour is a faster

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pace than i naturally want to walk it is a struggle i have to pay attention to the motion

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so whereas you would perform a complex action like walking

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or toothbrushing automatically because the ceos sitting around the boardroom in your brain are sending memos to one another,

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making clear what each is supposed to do and when they're supposed to do it,

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I have to stop and think and apply conscious control.

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It is the opposite of the exalted state of Cy Twombly seated at his painting.

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By engaging the conscious movement technique john d pepper has been able to tame his tremor

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and other symptoms he got parkinson's when he was in his 30s

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and is now in his 90s still walking still walking four miles per hour

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peppers may not be an entirely new discovery james parkinson records in his case notes of 1817,

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that the patient called case 6 was able to interrupt his interminable shaking for a few minutes by a brief,

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sudden, deliberate movement.

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Philosophically, there is something worthy of notice here, having to do with attention.

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When we bring an action out of habit

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and into consciousness we stir up a new perception of it inside and outside change places time shifts

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Parkinson's disease is always now or maybe we could say the disease reminds us

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that life is now and at this point my reasoning bumps into Gertrude Stein's famous sentence from 1913

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Rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.

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rose it's a rose it's a rose it's a rose about

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which she herself made the following comment now you all have seen hundreds of poems about roses

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and you know in your bones that the rose is not there I think in

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that line the rose is read for the first time in English poetry in a hundred years part three boxing.

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I go to boxing class three times a week.

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Everyone in the class has Parkinson's, various degrees of damage.

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At a certain point in each class, after we've done warm -up and strength training and footwork drills,

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the coach yells out, gloves on, and we rush to the lockers to get out our boxing gloves.

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Then station ourselves, each of us, at a heavy bag and go ahead punching.

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As you may know, there are six basic kinds of boxing punches.

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Each has a number.

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One, jab.

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Two, cross.

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Three, hook with left hand.

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Four, hook with right hand.

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Five, uppercut with left hand.

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Six, uppercut with right hand.

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You can see what a great boxer I am, you know, demonstration.

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It's better with the gloves on.

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The central portion of a boxing class involves punching the heavy

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bag according to a combination of numbers called out by the coach.

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We each reproduce the punches that match the numbers it all goes quite fast i find

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that when i am trying to perform a complicated boxing combination i can feel the neurons in my brain struggling

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and striving i know this sounds crazy but as we saw earlier that boundary between inside and outside is not so simple

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the more i know about parkinson's disease the more i see it as holding oneself upright against a current

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that never ceases to pull the books all tell me to

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pay conscious continual attention to actions like walking writing brushing my teeth

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if i want to inhibit or delay the failure of neurons in the brain.

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It is hard to live within constant striving.

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It is hard to live within the word degenerative, which means that however I strive, I do not win.

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Of course, everyone is striving all their life, and none of us will win against mortality.

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But there is a difference, or so it seems between striving to say learn ancient greek or get up off the couch and do the vacuuming

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and striving to pay microscopic attention to every instant of a physical act

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studying his own way of walking john d pepper analyzed it into nine segments of action

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and six targets of attention for each step that he takes the man is intense

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but before we leave the topic of striving one more observation about boxing class

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at the midpoint of every class the coach yells gloves on

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and we head for our lockers to get out the boxing

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gloves now putting on your first boxing glove is easy

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because you still have another hand putting on the second glove not

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so easy meanwhile the coach is yelling don't use your teeth

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so conventional practice is to look around

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for someone at large in the gym and ask him

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or her to put on your glove for you as I'm a classics person it struck me

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that this whole situation whereby one human being stands before another

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asking for help has the same structure as the ancient Greek ritual called supplication

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as when Priam comes to the tent of Achilles at the end of the Iliad

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and supplicates for the body of his son.

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And in my boxing class I observe that it is all but,

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all but, impossible,

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when someone else is putting a glove on your hand to conjure up or worry about the black doorway.

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writing this essay in a notebook with a pencil has been

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a chastening exercise the handwriting is partly legible I do not

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achieve any John Cage -like liberation from the shackles of myself

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with this scrawl the hand seems in fact to be all

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too much me speaking of authenticity though here is one final interesting incidental fact.

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During the Second World War, Cy Twombly was in the army and assigned to the cryptography division,

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where he spent a couple of years deciphering other people's stupid lines on paper.

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We should be careful how we read the marks on that clay envelope.

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But really, what difference does handwriting make.

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Almost everyone to whom I mentioned my worries about bad handwriting said something like, oh, I've always had awful writing.

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No one in my family can read it, and it gets worse over time.

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Nowadays, I do everything on computer.

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Often when people say this, they sound a bit sheepish.

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I wanted to get another angle on this sheepishness,

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so I decided to question composers about the difference between making a musical score by hand and using a computer program.

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First, I asked the American composer David Lang, who said that he began writing scores on computer in the early 90s,

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but always wondered what this might have changed in his composing, as he often uses a lot of math and graphs and charting of proportions,

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which are much easier to do on computer

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so in 2003 he decided to see what it would be

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like to return to the old ways he wrote a piece

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called this was written by hand completely made with just a pencil on paper i'll quote what he said about

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that experience i tried to make it as complicated and structured as the other music I was writing at the time,

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but I discovered that I no longer had the patience, so the piece ended up being a lot simpler.

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Then I had the idea that the music should only be published in a facsimile of my paper score,

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but when I tried to copy the music over neatly enough to publish it by hand, I kept making mistakes, and it became illegible,

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so I ended up copying it on my computer and publishing that version.

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After David Lang, I went to the Icelandic composer Maria Holdmark and Sigfrustdottir, who had a very different view.

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She said, Well, it's a bit hard to describe, but I feel more in touch with the music,

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almost as if writing by hand has the same quality as playing.

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She's a violinist.

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or that the music is more real not as generic as it sometimes seems when writing on the computer

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i feel like each of the notes has an individual personality

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when handwritten and this can be exaggerated with different emphasis on size shape

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or space of each note after she had shown me some

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of her handwritten scores maria added a third angle to the whole situation by telling me

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that before she puts any notes on paper she makes a drawing

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that has neither notes nor words just shapes

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and colors indicating the ideas for the work she seemed diffident about mentioning these sketches.

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Perhaps we are all a little uneasy with our own pre -verbal selves.

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However that may be, none of them seem to construe the situation as a crisis of self or a test of character, as I did.

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For this conviction, I had to fall back on Confucius, beware the man whose handwriting sways like a reed in the wind,

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not to mention Roland Barthes' inexhaustible question, how to draw a line that is not stupid.

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At this point, I felt I had exhausted aesthetics and turned to science,

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where there is a substantial body of evidence demonstrating that handwriting...

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stimulates different and more complex brain connections than typing on a keyboard,

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connections essential to encoding new information and forming memories.

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The precisely controlled movements of handwriting lead to patterns in the brain that promote learning.

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The brain opens, deepens, and enriches itself.

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There is in it, speaking subjectively, an exhilaration and a feeling of homecoming.

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Homecoming brings us near to the end of the lecture.

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To sum up, Actually, I'm terrible at summing up, so let's end with another text of Catullus.

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This, astonishingly, is a recently discovered papyrus, in which John D.

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Pepper interviews Catullus on various topics.

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um i'll impersonate john d pepper catullus will speak from the deep antiquity of the audience

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and john d pepper speaks first death death made me grow up love love made me endure Malady.

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Malady does not rest.

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Passion.

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Passion bewildered me.

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Parsnips.

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Parsnips taste like violets.

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Violets.

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Violets smell like parsnips.

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Gods.

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Gods cause me to be silent.

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Bureaucrats.

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Bureaucrats make me melancholy.

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Tears.

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Tears are my sisters.

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Laughter I wish I had a splendid laugh Warfare Ah,

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warfare Humankind Humankind is glass Roses I hate roses The line The line is just a lure

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Why not take the shorter way home?

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There was no shorter way home There was no shorter way home So, the end.

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Thank you.

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Thank you Anne.

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I think we're going to have some house lights come up.

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We have a few minutes for questions.

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Please raise your hand if you want to ask one.

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Wait for the roving mic and speak directly into the roving mic

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because the online audience were complaining that people weren't doing that last time.

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There's also some online questions that I'll turn

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but we'll start with one from the room i can see a hand in the middle aisle

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if one of the roving mics could um head up

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that way yeah okay um thanks very much alan sorry um you you said right at the beginning

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that when you saw how your handwriting had changed you you used the word embarrassing it was embarrassing

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and then you said later on it was chastening

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and i i just wondered if you could say a little bit more about embarrassment specifically

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and um i don't want to phrase it as the uses of embarrassment

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but your embarrassment has given us such an amazing lecture

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so i just wondered about um if you could speak a bit more about embarrassment thank you Yeah, embarrassment.

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It's a funny thing.

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I always try to, when I'm asked about a thing in me,

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I always try to think what it would be like for an ancient Greek to think that, to ask that or think that.

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And they don't have a word for embarrassment in ancient Greek, which is puzzling.

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They have a word for shame, which is related to embarrassment, but much less trivial or something but I think what

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what happened with the handwriting was

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that um looking at it i realized i could never be different than i am

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which is supposed to perhaps the thing you're supposed to recognize around age 17

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and somehow i missed that stop still trying to get there on the train but um

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It's a feeling of displacement for me from the self that I had been imagining I was, and then see, no, you're this.

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And I guess that's good and bad, both.

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I mean, it's always good to lose your preconceptions about anything, but especially the self.

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But it gives a different place to stand to look at whatever situation you're in.

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And I think that's the effect it had on me was just to make me stop and think,

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you know, what does it mean to be this person?

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What does it mean to be mortal, basically?

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You know, because when you're given a disease thing, you have to look at death and think, well, how will that be?

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What could I do to make that, like, more enjoyable for myself?

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Maybe not being embarrassed about it would be one aspect of that enjoyment, I don't know.

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But yeah, well good question.

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And there was an article in The Guardian a couple of weeks ago that was saying that

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handwriting might fall out of the culture completely within a couple of generations.

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Yeah.

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As people do what the friends in your lecture do, do you have a sense of what that does to

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society at large yeah i think it would be tragic really

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i don't i notice well there are lots of other examples of this

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but it does show up in people i teach they used

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uh i'm a professor sometimes i it shows up in in

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a different attitude to time it's all about the attitude to time that

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what's what makes people impatient about handwriting about writing things by hand is the time

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that it takes partly and so nowadays that's removed

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and with the removal of the time it takes to do

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a thing is removed the the state of mind they call reverie in

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which you think on your way to thinking you're not thinking yet exactly what you're going to think

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but you're getting there and

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that procedure is is i think where we grow up you

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know as mental as people who have mentality you learn to move around in your own brain in

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that space of reverie

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and handwriting among other things is one of the places where you get to practice that But if it's gone,

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I mean, think how fast texting goes now.

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Everything about texting is getting the thing done in four seconds.

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Why?

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I mean, what's the rush?

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And then you end up with a message that's always misspelled and usually ungrammatical and kind of stupid.

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It's just, you know, what do you want from Starbucks?

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I'm going there on the way home.

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Who really cares? but anyway so i think it would be really a tragedy

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if we lost handwriting um a question from sarah on the

421

live stream uh are there any changes in your handwriting

422

that you welcome have they changed the way you compose in

423

a way that's interesting i suppose that's what the lecture is about

424

but also you can answer it more directly i wouldn't say i mean it's made me envious of Cy Twombly

425

because he manages to write in a messy silly way

426

that somehow also incredibly forceful I think

427

when I see my messy handwriting it just looks well as I said stupid that's what Roland Barthes

428

that word he locates which is the right word it looks stupid

429

so no I don't think it has improved anything for me

430

actually have any more questions from the room I can see

431

a hand on the third row here down the middle aisle

432

oh thank you i wondered um how do you feel

433

when you box

434

and what's your favorite punch uh how do i feel uh

435

it's exhilarating some people a number of people in the class mentioned anger being angry

436

and using the anger on the on the punching, I never have got to that yet.

437

i'm not an angry person maybe

438

but instead of anger i have a the kind of exhilaration

439

that goes with anger the kind of heightening of senses

440

and perception um favorite punch uh it's hard to say the

441

combination the one through six combination is is um just extremely pleasurable the way it locks together

442

and you know each one comes out of the one before

443

and it's just a lovely little sequence like a metrical shape in a poem

444

so i think i really like all six of them together um anybody have a preference for one punch over another

445

that one's volunteering um rose on the live stream asks have you written any poems about boxing

446

um yeah years ago i did write a poem about in

447

tv men there's a poem about boxing a box a shadow

448

boxer i forget why it was oh yeah it's okay poem at the time

449

not great but oddly enough i remembered the other day out of the blue that

450

when i was 10 years old i think i was in

451

grade six we did have to do a project about about a way of life

452

and i did the history of boxing it was like a

453

big um tabletop cardboard collage with stand -up figures of the marquis of queensbury

454

and so on it was really terrific i wish i wish i still had it but

455

mother threw it out another question from the room i can see uh okay

456

so we'll go to the gentleman back first

457

so just about three rows down thank you very much thank

458

you very much I was diagnosed with Parkinson's in 2017

459

and I'm just getting used now to the the concepts of switching off

460

and switching on I wondered whether they've given you any pause for thought no explain

461

that can you they're switching off is the sensation as you

462

as you come to the end of the efficacy of the of the dose of the medication

463

that you're taking so it's it's an obviousness of slowing down and a paralysis of a kind and a stiffness,

464

but which you can almost anticipate because it's the end of the drug cycle.

465

It tells you that you need to take the next medicine, really.

466

But it's an idea that I struggle with and think about a lot, you know, this sense of myself switching off at some point and, you know, whether I like it or not,

467

unless I take a upland yeah i don't at the present have

468

that sensation other people in the boxing class have mentioned

469

that a number of them a number of times but i don't myself experience it but it must be

470

yeah distressing you have to expect it up and down the medication so far doesn't

471

affect me that much that i would notice a pattern

472

there's another question slightly further up in the middle there yeah thank you

473

thank you very much for your lecture i just want i just wondered uh do you ever think about ai

474

in how in what and how um I'm so worried about it,

475

what it might do to our minds, the fact that it's around us so much and it's hyped so much.

476

And you want me to solve that for you?

477

The gloves are the only way.

478

I can AI box I wonder yeah well that's an avenue of thought I had not explored

479

so thanks I'll do that perhaps over dinner is the Ann Carson bot AI driven

480

or is there a person behind it we just don't know do we no the fact

481

that it stopped suggests there's a person did it stop I wasn't really following the bar

482

but if it stopped i'm glad um kyle on the live stream asks it said

483

that vibrato tremor of the voice deliberately masks imperfections in pitch

484

do you have thoughts about tremors of sound as well as movement hmm no i don't have a single thought about that

485

I guess I'm not a singer or anything, so I really wouldn't know how it would affect, I mean, in giving a talk at the...

486

You have to control your voice to some extent, but I have no idea what it sounds like.

487

In my head, it just sounds, as I say, stupid.

488

So there is no, I don't have any sort of two sides to that knowledge.

489

So no, I just say no. The Twombly pictures, it struck me that your last book,

490

Wrong Norma, has lots of images with quite a sort of twombly -ish energy about them, some of them.

491

I wondered how this

492

has affected your drawing and the role drawing serves in your creative practice

493

and whether there's a kind of parallel story that's slightly different.

494

I don't find that tremor kicks in when I'm drawing

495

so that's provocative isn't it someone should study that PhDs will be written

496

sure they will uh more questions from the room we've got one in the this side of the middle aisle

497

um so

498

if you just come down about halfway um it's right on

499

the other side of the road from where you are

500

so keep keep coming down

501

but we'll have to pass the mic across this is very

502

like my brain trying to find a neuron to do the thing it needs.

503

Sai Twomley is my favourite, my first ever favourite artist and I can really

504

remember the first time I encountered his work and what that experience was like as a teenager.

505

And I wondered if you could share a bit about what that was like for you encountering his work.

506

I think I first encountered it

507

because Currie took me to the Philadelphia Art Museum where they

508

have the the sequence about the um the Iliad I think it's I don't know what it's called

509

but anyway it's a number of a whole room full of paintings about Achilles and Agamemnon and so on

510

and I was in school well teaching school at the time in classics

511

and it was just fabulous to have somebody actually using all this material

512

that i thought of as too esoteric to be cared about by anybody my own age

513

and and then also to have half of it misspelled

514

because you know he misspells ilia he deliberately did it wrong

515

and then waited for people to complain and no one did

516

and he was incensed that no one no one cared

517

that he spelled the Iliam wrong but anyway

518

so yeah it was completely exhilarating to me to see

519

that room it you should all go to Philadelphia and see that room

520

he said yeah I think we've got time for about two more questions

521

so um I can see another just another hand a bit

522

closer actually maybe yeah no come down about three more rows

523

and then again sorry it's the other end of of the row no no keep coming

524

and then the end of that row thank you

525

hi is this working um i thought

526

that the handwriting in your text nox always resembled site homily the way you write michael at the beginning

527

and i was wondering what you were thinking about the self present in the printed handwriting of

528

that text and your handwriting now That's complicated.

529

The writing of the Michael, the name.

530

One thing, though, is it's off again.

531

I wrote his name in cursive.

532

Twombly never uses cursive.

533

It's always printing, as far as I remember.

534

well no there are some there are some that are scrawled

535

that way so I didn't think about Twombly at

536

that time I can't remember when I did that

537

but it was long before I think I think long before I knew about Twombly's work

538

or had studied it looked at it carefully so I yeah I don't know I like the way the book looks,

539

I like the way that name works on that page, but I don't know that I thought of it as Twombly -like at the time.

540

But thank you, it's nice to remember that page.

541

Rather than a final question, we're actually going to hand over to Curry for a final moment, So if we could get that mic there,

542

to the front here, before I hand over to Currie, it'd be great if we could just say thank you to Anne one more time.

543

Hello, hello, hello, oh there we are, you know when Ann and I do performances together we always end it in a particular way

544

and um even though suzanne's lecture we decided we still have to end it in

545

that particular way

546

so you know there's an artist who is one of the

547

great artists of the last 75 years yoko ono who in 1961 i think wrote a piece called the scream symphony

548

and ann and i for a number of years have ended our performances with the scream symphony

549

so what What we're going to ask you to do is for 10 seconds, scream at the top of your lungs,

550

remembering Yoko and thinking about joy.

551

So on three, Ann will count it off, everybody's going to scream for 10 seconds.

552

You ready?

553

One, two, three.

554

Thank you, thank you.

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FOR YOU

Лексика и советы по произношению к этому уроку

Этот урок разговорной практики построен на видео «Anne Carson: Beware the man whose handwriting sways like a reed in the wind». В этом видео 554 предложений и 7008 слов для шедоуинга. Речь длится 56:17. Говорящий держит ровный темп — около 125 слов в минуту, удобный для шедоуинга. Только 78% слов входят в 3000 самых частых слов английского языка, поэтому лексика сложная.

Ключевая лексика этого видео

15 слов из видео, которые стоит выучить, с произношением и значением:

Слово	Произношение	Значение
handwriting существительное	/ˈhændɹaɪtɪŋ/	собственнору́чная за́пись
sigh глагол	/saɪ/	вздыха́ть, вздохну́ть
poem существительное	/ˈpoʊ.əm/	стихи́, стихотворе́ние
glove существительное	/ɡlʌv/	перча́тка, рукави́ца
punch существительное	/pʌnt͡ʃ/	уда́р
embarrassment существительное	/ɪmˈbæɹ.əs.mənt/	смуще́ние, стесне́ние
gene существительное	/d͡ʒiːn/	ген
lecture существительное	/ˈlɛk.t͡ʃə/	ле́кция, уро́к
pepper существительное	/ˈpɛp.ə/	пе́рец
strive глагол	/ˈstɹaɪv/	стреми́ться, стара́ться
shake глагол	/ˈʃeɪk/	трясти́
doorway существительное	/ˈdɔɹweɪ/	дверно́й проём
anger существительное	/ˈæŋɡə/	гнев, злость
angle существительное	/ˈæŋ.ɡəl/	у́гол
clay существительное	/kleɪ/	гли́на

Фразовые глаголы, которые вы услышите

Слово	Значение
end up глагол	зака́нчиваться, зако́нчиться
grow up глагол	расти́, выраста́ть
switch off глагол	выключа́ть, вы́ключить
call out глагол	заявля́ть
come down глагол	спуска́ться, спусти́ться
come up глагол	поднима́ться, подня́ться
fall apart глагол	распада́ться, распа́сться
get up глагол	поднима́ться, подня́ться

Фразы, которые стоит повторять

Короткие законченные фразы из видео, которые пригодятся в повседневном разговоре:

Do you hear sighing?
Do you wake amid a sigh?
Do you ever wonder what it's like inside the brain?
What could I do to make that, like, more enjoyable for myself?
I mean, what's the rush?

Грамматика в этом видео

Конструкции, которые говорящий использует чаще всего, с точными словами из видео:

Конструкция	В видео
Present Perfect have/has + причастие прошедшего времени — прошлое действие, важное сейчас	has been paralyzed · have gone · has proven
Пассивный залог be + причастие прошедшего времени — важно, что происходит, а не кто это делает	cannot be properly fulfilled · were provoked · was diagnosed
Придаточные определительные who / which + предложение — уточнение о человеке или предмете	person who has · degenerative, which means · Greek, which is

Произношение, на которое стоит обратить внимание

Говорящий использует 76 сокращённых и редуцированных форм, например don't, I'm, you're. Произносите их коротко, так, как слышите.

Звуки «th»: smooth /smuːð/, mathematics /mæθ(.ə)ˈmæt.ɪks/, toothbrush /ˈtuːθ.bɹʌʃ/
Звуки «sh» и «zh»: shake /ˈʃeɪk/, conscious /ˈkɑn.ʃəs/, rush /ɹʌʃ/, passion /ˈpæʃən/, brush /bɹʌʃ/
Длинные слова — следите за ударением: embarrassment /ɪmˈbæɹ.əs.mənt/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, deliberate /dɪˈlɪb.(ə.)ɹət/, medication /mɛdɪˈkeɪʃən/, presumably /pɹɪˈzuːməbli/

Звуки, трудные для русскоязычных:

/w/ — губы округлены, это не /v/: doorway /ˈdɔɹweɪ/, beware /biˈwɛɚ/, sway /ˈsweɪ̯/, sequence /ˈsiː.kwəns/, warfare /ˈwɔɹfɛɹ/
/h/ — лёгкий выдох, а не русское «х»: handwriting /ˈhændɹaɪtɪŋ/, hook /hʊk/, homecoming /ˈhoʊmˌkʌmɪŋ/, whereas /(h)wɛɹˈæz/
Звонкие согласные в конце слова — не оглушайте их: glove /ɡlʌv/, strive /ˈstɹaɪv/, cage /keɪd͡ʒ/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, reed /ɹiːd/

Как заниматься с этим видео

Прослушайте всё видео один раз молча и выпишите незнакомые слова.
Повторяйте предложение за предложением на обычной скорости, пока ваш ритм не совпадёт с ритмом говорящего.
Запишите себя и сравните с оригиналом, обращая внимание на такие слова, как handwriting, sigh, poem.

Что такое техника Shadowing?

Shadowing — это научно обоснованная техника изучения языка, изначально разработанная для подготовки профессиональных переводчиков и популяризированная полиглотом доктором Александром Аргуэльесом. Метод прост, но эффективен: вы слушаете аудио на английском от носителей языка и немедленно повторяете вслух — как тень, следующая за говорящим с задержкой в 1–2 секунды. В отличие от пассивного прослушивания или грамматических упражнений, Shadowing заставляет мозг и мышцы рта одновременно обрабатывать и воспроизводить реальные речевые паттерны. Исследования показывают, что это значительно улучшает точность произношения, интонацию, ритм, связную речь, понимание на слух и беглость речи — что делает его одним из самых эффективных методов для подготовки к IELTS Speaking и реального общения на английском.

Техника шедоуинга: читать полное пошаговое руководство →

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