跟讀練習: Good communicator secrets nobody tells you - 通過影片學習英語口語
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153 句
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The losers, the conversations that produced the worst connection, the most awkwardness were, what do you do?
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Why?
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So these last two, how are you and what do you do?
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They're very socially scripted, right?
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The moment we ask those questions, our brain goes into autopilot.
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So there's a lack, it's more of a performance.
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There's a lack of excitement in the conversation.
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And they ran out of things to talk about.
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They're fact -based questions.
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And this is the trap of what we'll call level one conversation, which is you are trapped in fact.
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Where are you from? got any kids, married, the facts are dead ends, right?
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So it's very hard for someone to break out of that fact because they're stuck in that social script.
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The best conversation starter was actually a sneaker.
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I was like, well, interesting that this one did best by lot.
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It was, what was the highlight of your day?
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Now, what this question does psychologically, it sounds casual.
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Well, first of all, it's not too deep.
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A mistake that extroverts can make is they ask too deep, too quickly, right?
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They're like, what is your greatest goal in life?
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And you're like, I don't know you, right?
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So it's not too deep, but it's a subtle replacement for how are you.
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You're actually asking the other person's brain to search for optimism.
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You're literally inviting their brain to think like, what was good?
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And then they think, well, highlighted my day.
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So one, we just broke autopilot.
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The moment someone goes, oh, and they're thinking for the first time, their brain goes, ooh, we get to do something new.
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So they got to think of something new, and it was immediate.
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It wasn't like a too big of a question.
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The second question was, have anything exciting you're working on?
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This is kind of a subtle replacement for what do you do, right?
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If someone likes what they do, they're going to talk about it, but they're going to reframe it in something exciting.
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And if someone isn't defined by what they do, they're going to share something better.
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The third question, very, very simple, was do you have any fun plans coming up?
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These questions, the first three, are literally searching for good.
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You're inviting the other person to only think about good things and we're juicing excitement from other parts of their life.
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Now the fourth question, this fourth question, people either loved it or they hated it.
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They either gave it a five, that was like the most connective thing I felt all week,
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or a zero, and a zero wasn't even an option on my scale.
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It was the question, what's your story?
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Extroverts tend to default to that question because they want to go a little bit deeper.
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But actually, that is a level three question.
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It is way too advanced.
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For someone who's introverted or someone who has never framed their story that quickly, they're immediately put into cortisol.
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They're immediately put into fight or flight.
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They're like, what's my story?
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How can I give that to you so quickly?
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So you're by accident putting them into conversational fear.
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This is when I realized there's a hierarchy.
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Dr. Dan McAdams found that conversation is actually not as fluid as we would like to think
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that actually when we're trying to connect with someone else, we are trying to move through three distinct levels.
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Level one is called general traits.
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This is why in those first few minutes, you're basically trying to Google fact check someone.
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Like, where are you from?
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What do you do?
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Married.
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Where do you live in LA?
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Right?
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Like you're trying to ask all those questions because there's a sort of social hierarchy.
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Our brain processes social facts from least intimate to most intimate.
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So we cannot get to know someone on their deepest dreams and worries if we don't know the basic facts about them.
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So that is why we often fall into that trap of those fact -based questions.
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The key here is that really good level one question is taking those facts but adding story, but adding emotion.
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So the best way to do level one better is you're swapping out those bad questions, right?
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How are you?
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What do you do?
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With looking for a story.
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I truly believe a fact is a stop sign.
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A story is a doorway.
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Okay, so one of them, we actually can place it on here, is what's your personal passion project, okay?
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Now, what's your personal passion project is actually a hunt for stories, right?
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And would you open with that?
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Is that what you're saying?
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Or is it doesn't really matter?
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It has to come.
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It can come in the first few minutes.
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Now, I probably wouldn't walk into a room and be like, what's your personal passion project, Stephen?
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Right?
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It's a little bit much.
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We have to do our basic first impression, and we can talk about, you know, first 10 words in a little bit.
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But as an opener question, it's better than how are you.
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And I have to pause here and say, everything I'm going to share takes a little bit of conversational courage.
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It's really safe to ask how are you.
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It's really safe to ask what do you do.
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But if you want to be memorable, if you want to actually spark connection, those won't serve you.
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So it does take a little bit of courage to ask this, but the answers you're going to get are incredibly interesting.
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You're going to get stories.
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You're going to get a hint at values.
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If you want to know if they're married or have kids, they probably will tell you by accident.
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So it's like a hunt for stories.
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Same with, I mentioned this one in the study, so working on anything exciting these days.
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This is, again, one of my favorite swap questions because you're hunting for something good.
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Now, when I think about conversation in level one, you're trying to gift someone a chemical cocktail.
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a little bit.
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And I think in level one, these two questions are doing a lot of heavy lifting.
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They are now competing with your feed.
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I went to a PTA meeting recently, and those are torture, if you've ever been to one for any parents watching.
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What's a PTA meeting?
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Oh, a parent -teacher meeting.
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Okay.
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Right.
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So a bunch of other parents in the room.
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And I wanted to go meet other moms because I just moved across the country to try to meet more people.
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And I was excited.
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I was like, Okay, I'm going to meet more moms.
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Here we go.
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And I walk in the room and everyone's scrolling.
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Everyone's on their feed.
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And I realize, wow, conversation now is not just about a way for me to make friends.
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It actually has to compete with that feed.
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I have to make my questions and my answers so dopamine worthy that they're actually going to beat that feed.
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Otherwise, they're going to go right back to their phone.
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That is why these have to do more lifting because if I want to compete with the feed, I have to produce dopamine,
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a little bit of excitement, a little bit of motivation.
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I also have to create what I would call, forgive me for this word, but conversational confetti.
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This is like, we got to lift a little bit more in our conversations
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because otherwise someone's going to go right back to scrolling.
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Their brain is somewhere else.
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Either their brain is in their email list or their brain is on their feed.
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When I was studying amazing conversationalists, one of the one people I studied is Howard Stern.
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So however you feel about Howard Stern, he is a master conversationalist.
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I mean, he can carry on long, very interesting.
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He gets people to say things that I could never imagine.
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So I analyzed thousands of transcripts of his interviews, and I found one pattern.
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He does a very good job of creating information gaps.
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So he'll say, what's the weirdest thing you've ever done?
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Or he'll say, the most surprising thing that happened to me yesterday, you want to hear what it was?
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And your brain doesn't like not knowing.
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So when it hears the most surprising, the weirdest, the biggest, the worst, the most embarrassing, the brain creates this gap.
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Like it's this information gap where the brain is like, I have to know what is the weirdest thing.
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So also what happens with these kinds of questions is we're creating these little information gaps
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and actually saying and using in conversation these phrases is a way that we can create more intrigue and interest.
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And I know that sounds like, what?
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But think about this.
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If something crazy happened to you yesterday and you walk into dinner
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and you're like guys the craziest thing happened to me yesterday everyone's like phones down right
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now I couldn't say something boring
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I couldn't be like I was stuck in traffic yeah unless you want to be funny
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but I think that looking for opportunities to create
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that little bit of conversational confetti they come up with questions like this this is the last one
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so have any fun plans coming up
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now the reason why this one is important I agonized over this over this third question
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because there's three questions for each level is have any fun
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plans coming up is a subtle way to bring up potential shared future psychologically speaking we bond with someone
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when we feel like we could do something fun with them
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or they're doing something fun that i would also like to do i think
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that part of these questions is being known for asking better questions like being known for searching for hunting
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or hunting for excitement because what happen is with people who know you at work
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or your work friends or outside of work friends is they'll bring these things to you.
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They know that you're going to ask out personal passions.
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So next time you get to say, hey, last time we were talking, you mentioned XYZ.
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How's that going?
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So they also become your callbacks.
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They make conversation easier later.
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本課的詞彙與口語要點
這節口語課以影片“Good communicator secrets nobody tells you”為素材。 這段影片共有 153 個句子、1728 個單詞可供跟讀。 講話部分時長為 8:37。 說話人語速較快，每分鐘約 201 個詞，會出現較多連讀和弱讀。 87% 的單詞屬於英語最常用的 3,000 詞，詞彙容易理解。 全部 153 個句子中有 36 個是問句，適合練習疑問語調和簡短回答。
影片中的重點詞彙
影片中 15 個值得學習的單詞，附發音和釋義：
| 單詞 | 發音 | 釋義 |
|---|---|---|
| passion 名詞 | /ˈpæʃən/ | 激情, 熱情 /熱情 |
| excitement 名詞 | /ɪkˈsaɪtmənt/ | 興奮 /興奮, 激動 /激動 |
| compete 動詞 | /kəmˈpiːt/ | 競爭 /競爭, 高下 |
| trap 名詞 | /tɹæp/ | 陷阱, 圈套 |
| subtle 形容詞 | /ˈsʌtəl/ | 微妙 |
| gap 名詞 | /ɡæp/ | 間隙 /間隙 |
| script 名詞 | /skɹɪpt/ | 文章 |
| courage 名詞 | /ˈkʌ.ɹɪd͡ʒ/ | 勇氣 /勇氣, 膽量 /膽量 |
| invite 動詞 | /ɪnˈvaɪt/ | 邀請 /邀請, 請 /請 |
| highlight 動詞 | /ˈhaɪˌlaɪt/ | 凸顯 /凸顯, 強調 /強調 |
| swap 動詞 | /ˈswɑp/ | 交換 /交換, 對調 /對調 |
| scroll 名詞 | /skɹoʊl/ | 條幅 /條幅, 卷軸 /卷軸 |
| hierarchy 名詞 | /ˈhaɪ.ə.ɹɑː(ɹ).ki/ | 等級制度 /等級制度, 階層 /階層 |
| connect 動詞 | /kəˈnɛkt/ | 連線 /連線 |
| juice 名詞 | /d͡ʒuːs/ | 汁, 果汁 |
影片中出現的短語動詞
| 單詞 | 釋義 |
|---|---|
| come up 動詞 | 上來 /上來 |
| bring up 動詞 | 撫養 /撫養, 養大 /養大 |
| come up with 動詞 | 想出, 提出 |
值得反覆跟讀的句子
影片中簡短而完整的句子，可以直接用在日常對話裡：
- It was, what was the highlight of your day?
- They're like, what is your greatest goal in life?
- It was the question, what's your story?
- They're like, what's my story?
- Is that what you're saying?
影片中的語法
說話人最常用的結構，並附上影片中的原話：
| 結構 | 影片中的用法 |
|---|---|
| 被動語態 be + 過去分詞 — 強調發生了什麼，而不是誰做的 | are trapped · isn't defined · is called |
| 現在完成時 have/has + 過去分詞 — 過去發生但與現在仍有關聯的事 | has never framed · you've ever been · you've ever done |
| 定語從句 who / which + 從句 — 補充說明人或事物 | conversation, which is · someone who has · people who know |
需要注意的發音
說話人用了 54 次縮略和弱讀形式，例如 you're, they're, we're。請按聽到的簡短形式來說。
- “sh” 和 “zh” 音: passion /ˈpæʃən/, impression /ɪmˈpɹɛʃn̩/, casual /ˈkæʒ(u)əl/, motivation /ˈmoʊ.tə.veɪ.ʃən/, emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/
- 長單詞——注意重音位置: hierarchy /ˈhaɪ.ə.ɹɑː(ɹ).ki/, incredibly /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/, motivation /ˈmoʊ.tə.veɪ.ʃən/, optimism /ˈɑptɪmɪzəm/, conversational /ˌkɒnvə(ɹ)ˈseɪʃənəl/
中文母語者容易讀錯的音：
- /v/ — 不要讀成 /w/，上齒輕觸下唇: invite /ɪnˈvaɪt/, forgive /fɚˈɡɪv/, motivation /ˈmoʊ.tə.veɪ.ʃən/, conversational /ˌkɒnvə(ɹ)ˈseɪʃənəl/, conversationalist /ˌkɑːnvɚˈseɪʃənəlɪst/
- 詞尾子音 — 要讀清楚，後面不要加母音: excitement /ɪkˈsaɪtmənt/, compete /kəmˈpiːt/, trap /tɹæp/, gap /ɡæp/, replacement /ɹɪˈpleɪsmənt/
- /r/ 和 /l/ 的區別: replacement /ɹɪˈpleɪsmənt/, scroll /skɹoʊl/, incredibly /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/, memorable /ˈmɛm.(ə)ɹə.bl̩/, conversational /ˌkɒnvə(ɹ)ˈseɪʃənəl/
如何用這段影片練習
- 先完整聽一遍影片，不要開口，記下不認識的單詞。
- 先用 0.75 倍速逐句跟讀，熟練之後再回到正常速度。
- 錄下自己的聲音並與原聲對比，特別注意 passion, excitement, compete 這類單詞。
什麼是跟讀法？
跟讀法 (Shadowing) 是一種有科學依據的語言學習技巧，最初開發用於專業口譯員的培訓，並由多語言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。這個方法簡單而強大：您在聽英語母語原聲的同時立即大聲重複——就像是一個延遲1-2秒緊跟說話者的影子。與被動聽力或語法練習不同，跟讀法強迫您的大腦和口腔肌肉同時處理並模模擬實的講話模式。研究表明它能顯著提高發音準確性，語調，節奏，連讀，聽力理解和口語流利度——使其成為雅思口語備考和真實英語交流最有效的方法之一。