쉐도잉 연습: I hate being performative - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

I hate being performative.

I hate it when I can just feel this angst inside myself

when I'm trying to either seek someone's approval or I'm trying to just fit in.

Now, I think there's different levels.

There's different levels of being performative or performance.

And one is sort of, maybe all of them are sort of out of this sense of insecurity.

But some of them, I guess, are worse than others.

Some of them, someone is completely fake Someone could be, I don't know, maybe their whole life is a liar Just what they say and how they act is disingenuine

Versus someone who is trying to fit in, but they don't quite know how And I guess that's where I am Not right now,

but I have been in the latter

Trying to either fit in with a group Or just feel like I am not a complete outsider

and I guess especially in school high school I felt

so much anxiety and maybe I wasn't performative

but I was just very very aware too aware too conscious

to the point where I guess I wasn't really doing a whole lot from the outside

but from the inside I felt like I wasn't me I wasn't acting like myself

and it was performance without any actual outside performance

but just constant monitoring of myself which is in some sense performance

or maybe just really bad anxiety

but nonetheless I don't feel this way anymore at least not nearly as much as

when I was in school maybe sometimes in some way I feel this way

but um it's definitely gotten a lot better But I think it's weird because,

especially with social media, but even maybe just in a place like school, you know, who is being real, who is just performing?

And you wonder, well, who am I in relation to all this?

Am I performing?

Or is everyone just kind of hiding something, hiding how they really feel about their life?

I don't know.

Are people just kind of ignorant or are people just very good at performance?

I don't know but I feel like in some way our whole life is just an act.

We're all just trying to make people think we are someone

that we don't really feel like or that we hope to be

but we don't necessarily feel like we are

and we're just doing things to convince everyone but

if everyone's doing this then what's the point maybe we can all just drop the act

and just start being more real with each other maybe we can stop trying to focus

so much on being this person who is thought highly of instead just not care so much.

I don't know.

To many, it probably isn't that easy.

Maybe even to me.

I mean, just recording this video, maybe this is a performance.

I don't know.

But here's what I'll say.

To me, I do not trust the person who is always agreeable, nor do I trust the person who is always disagreeable.

I think especially on social media,

there is sort of this idea that if you're someone who's super duper relatable or super duper just like repulsive or disagreeable,

then you'll be popular.

And I wonder, well, how much of it is just trying to be agreeable or trying to be disagreeable just for,

you know, the views, the likes or the follows or whatever versus what do you actually think?

Because that's what I want to know.

I don't want to know what you think that is politically correct.

I don't know what you want to think that you think other people will approve of.

I just want to know what you think.

And it's difficult in society, at least in Western society.

Maybe this is probably just a whole world thing, but not wanting to be perceived in a certain way as negative based off of either how you act

or what you think or your opinions.

And it's maybe in some context, maybe in some context, you could say maybe it's a good thing.

But I think overall, overall, probably in 99% of situations,

it's bad because everyone kind of just keeps what they really think on the inside.

and instead they just perform.

And I don't think it helps anyone.

I don't think it helps society.

I don't think it helps people grow.

I don't think it helps people get along better either.

I think really it's just performance, like I've been saying so many times.

But yeah, I don't want to be performative.

It's like the thing about social media, posting on here, It's like, what's going to happen to me if I get famous?

Or if people start, you know, commenting more, saying things, whatever, whether it's good or bad, what's going to happen?

Will I turn into someone who I'm not actually?

Will I just start performing and just lose myself?

I hope not.

But maybe it's also a test of character. And that's the thing.

Like you see people like when they get famous, some people say, oh, that guy really changed.

They changed or they weren't the same way they are.

But I wonder in what way?

In what way did they change?

Did they change in a better way or a worse way?

It's usually a worse way when people talk about it that way. But why?

Is it fame?

Is it money?

Is it power?

I wonder.

I really do.

But I guess here's my declaration or proclamation.

I'll say it out loud here.

I declare that I will not let it destroy me or ruin me or strip out the things that are genuine.

Because in some way, the more popular or famous you get, the more you have to lose.

and it's like people care more about how they are perceived versus just in some sense their dignity

their dignity their dignity of what they stand on what they believe in And I don't like that, you know?

It's unfortunate.

And I guess I don't want to become that way.

So we'll have to see.

We'll have to see what happens to me, to my life.

In one way, I guess success would be a great thing.

But in another way, it's a test.

It's a test to see who will I become Will I just become another performer Or will I somehow remain me

I think fame changes everyone To some extent

But it shouldn't change you In a super negative way In some sense it should

I don't know Amplify the good things about you I mean, I guess that's what I would hope it would do, but maybe that's just like wishful thinking.

100

That's probably not what happens most of the time.

101

But yeah, that's what I'm thinking.

102

I don't want to be performative.

103

I just want to be me.

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이 클립의 말하기 목표

자신의 진심을 표현하는 능력을 키우고, 불안감이나 타인의 인정을 구하는 심리로 인한 "과도한 연기적 행동"을 설명하는 표현을 익히는 것이 목표입니다. 특히 일상 대화에서 복잡한 감정과 생각을 자연스럽게 전달하는 fluency를 향상시킬 수 있습니다. shadowing practice를 통해 이 대화의 리듬과 어투를 따라하며, 자기 표현의 자연스러움을 키울 수 있습니다.

유용한 표현 모음

be performative: 연기적 행동을 하다 (예: "I hate being performative" - 나는 연기적 행동하는 것을 싫어해)
seek someone's approval: 누군가의 인정을 구하다
fit in: 동조하다, 적응하다
out of a sense of insecurity: 불안감에서 비롯된
disingenuine: 진실하지 않은, 가짜의
drop the act: 연기를 그만두다, 진실로 행동하다
be thought highly of: 높이 평가받다

약점을 보완하자

이 대화는 "anxiety", "insecurity", "disingenuine"와 같은 긴 단어의 발음과, 문장 중간에 있는 쉼표의 리듬을 연습하기 좋습니다. 특히 "I guess", "I mean"과 같은 충격어의 사용법을 익히면, 대화가 더 자연스러워집니다. shadowing site를 이용해 이 대화를 여러 번 따라하며, 발음의 정확성과 리듬을 체크하세요. "But some of them, I guess, are worse than others"와 같은 문장에서 쉼표의 위치에 맞춰 말하는 연습을 하면, 의미 전달이 더 명확해집니다. 또한 "drop the act"와 같은 관용구의 뉘앙스를 이해하고, 실제 대화에서 사용해보세요.

이 영상의 문법

화자가 가장 많이 쓰는 문형을 영상 속 실제 표현과 함께 정리했습니다.

문형	영상 속 표현
관계절 who / which + 절 — 사람이나 사물에 대한 추가 정보	someone who is · myself which is · person who is
수동태 be + 과거분사 — 누가 하는지보다 무슨 일이 일어나는지에 초점	is thought · be perceived · are perceived

쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법

쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.

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