Shadowing Practice: I Asked 90 Year Olds for Life Advice and Learned... - Learn English Speaking with Video
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268 sentences
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What's a big mistake that you made or a big regret that you have that taught you a valuable lesson?
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I was just kind of pushed around by life.
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The courage of your convictions.
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Try to have it.
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It was a horrible nightmare.
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I didn't want that.
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I don't see any hope right now.
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Have you ever wondered what the regrets of some of the oldest and wisest people in the world are?
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What about their best pieces of life advice for someone of your age?
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In this video, I will be in New York City, asking strangers in their 90s about their secrets to living a longer,
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greater, and more fulfilling life.
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And trust me when I say this, their advice will blow your mind.
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How old are you?
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I'm going to be 91 in April.
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90 years old.
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I'm 100 years old.
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A century.
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A long time.
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What's your date of birth?
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November 23rd, 1924.
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Wow.
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I'm 85, which I cannot believe.
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What does it feel like to be 85?
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I don't know what 85 is.
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I have no clue.
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I'm dancing tango.
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I do everything everybody does.
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You know, logically, you know your life is ending.
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While we always forget that our life, your life, any minute can end.
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It's a little shocking, really.
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My high school friends and I, who I still see sometimes, they're all saying we never knew we would make it this long.
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But we did.
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Used to be we were older at 65.
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But at 65, no one's old.
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At 85, I began to slow down, not do the stuff I could do.
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Why do you think that you're like this and there's so many other 85-year-olds that are not?
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I'm so curious.
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I'm so interested.
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Every day, it's like a cabinet of curiosity for me.
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I think attitude has a lot to do with it.
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Sometimes not taking life too seriously.
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Laughter is important, and kindness is extremely important.
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What do you think led you to be 93?
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Well, nothing led me.
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I just am.
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What leads you to be whatever age you are?
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No, but you lived longer than most people still, right?
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Because I didn't have a fatal illness.
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I mean, if I'd had a heart attack, I wouldn't have been anything.
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If you compare when you were a kid growing up, do you think it's harder for someone to grow up today in this world or easier?
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Yes, I think it's harder because they don't know what's going on.
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Changes are so rapid.
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It took 200 years for this country to be a safe democracy where people came to be free.
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And no matter how poor you are, if you work hard enough, maybe the gold wasn't in the streets,
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but you could work hard and become somebody.
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And today, everyone is terrified, and the world has changed.
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So was it easier to be young then?
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Indeed it was.
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Indeed it was.
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You have to be a jack-of-all-trades, and then a dollar doesn't go anywhere here at this time.
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Well, in mine, I could hitchhike around Europe for less than $5 a day.
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You know, we left a big mess behind us.
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If I were your age, I'd really bitch.
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My first job, I got paid $45 a week, and I could live on that.
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Think of it.
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The price of a bagel now.
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I know.
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It's just ridiculous.
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Now, it's hard.
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It's really hard.
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Everybody's in finance and business because they have to get their student loans paid off.
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So we're kind of ruining the whole point of the education?
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It's changed it, that's for sure.
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Are you, were you married?
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With that lady there here.
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Married for three years wow so you got married at 87.
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you've been married three years you got married at 90 to a younger man you're a cougar congratulations how's
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that feel thank you robbing the cradle I was married.
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In fact, my husband just died on February 3rd.
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Oh, wow.
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I'm sorry.
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How long were you guys together?
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60 years.
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Wow.
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My husband passed away, but we were married for 66 years, so that was a long marriage.
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Wow.
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When did he, how long ago?
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Actually, it was only a couple, almost two years that he passed away he had a very bad dementia.
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66 years together.
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What do you think is the secret to that marriage lasting 66 years?
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A sense of humor.
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We both could laugh.
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Yeah.
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I was about 21.
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I never expected to get married that early.
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In fact, I didn't expect to get married at all.
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I didn't have more than two boyfriends at the most.
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But when I met my husband, somehow I knew he was nothing like I expected him to be.
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but he was the one who was going to live with me for 65 years
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and indeed he did everyone loved him they would have done anything for him he wasn't handsome he wasn't tall
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but he was just a really wonderful wonderful man are you married no
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now i'm divorced now you're divorced i'm i'm a divorced woman two years ago two years yeah
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and how long were you guys together for we were we were not together for 20 years
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but he wouldn't we lived kind of family and everything
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and he always had a girlfriend for 20 something years
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but two years ago he finally asked me
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because she asked him to marry him finally wow 20 years he was still a family man
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and he was still you know a good friend I can't see that always so black and white.
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What is a lesson that you learn if you're looking back on everything that happened there, the lesson that that taught you about life?
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I have always been enormously compassionate, and I always see the other side and maybe too much of it.
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I could see that he wanted something other than me.
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I was very powerful and very strong and very opinionated.
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And I think that had its 20 years,
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and after that he looked for someone who was more looking up at him and seeing him as a teacher or something.
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You know, you go into things with as good a heart as you could go into it.
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If it doesn't work, it's not a total loss.
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I mean, we had these great children.
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I did care a lot about them.
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I'm not sorry that I did it.
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It just didn't work.
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Can you define the word love?
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Love means being obsessed by somebody.
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What I have felt in this relationship is that I haven't felt any red flags.
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So, okay, so love is no red flags.
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I had a friend who once said, I love it in life when all of a sudden the lights go green.
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That's what's happened.
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I like that you're looking at him too when you said all this.
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It's something I'm always looking for and I'm completely open.
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The interesting thing is I have in one book I wrote about in American we say falling in love.
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Falling and it means like you fall down because you can't fall upwards.
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It is not so really what I think is correct.
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Love should be much more a meeting.
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But I do think it is the most powerful feeling and the most powerful drive is love.
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It really is.
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So you're born in 1934?
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1934. So you get out of college, let's say you're in the 1950s what what is
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that like what was set up for me was to become a stock broker
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or make a and go into business make money have a lawn have a wife
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that smiled have kids that you know
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that also smile it was a horrible nightmare of a vision i didn't want
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that so i took an end run
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and i i had been in europe for my junior year
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and i got a sense of it so i i met an italian woman and we
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And she lived in Rome and then I ended up in Rome.
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And I look at all my co-inhabitants here.
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And they all went the business way.
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They made enough money to be comfortable.
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I got to the same place doing what I wanted to do.
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So you were coming out of college and you felt the pressure to go and be a stockbroker.
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Who was pressuring you to do that?
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My father took me to his office.
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You know, he confirmed my conviction that I didn't want to do that.
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Was he mad?
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Was he mad?
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He was disappointed.
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He was a wonderful, happy success.
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I have a brother who became an opera singer.
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He looked at us and said, who the hell are these kids?
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They're not mine.
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A lot of people try to set goals for themselves, but they don't end up achieving them.
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Why do you think that most people set goals, but they don't achieve them?
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I wasn't very focused.
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I didn't have enough confidence to know what to do.
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I was just kind of pushed around by life.
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I think you're lucky if you stumble into something that interests you
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and you stay with it because one thing does lead to another.
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And if you keep doing what you're doing, it will open up something else for sure.
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And then that will take you someplace else.
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I'm sure that's happened to you already with your own life.
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Yeah.
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Well, when I quit my job six years ago, there's no way I would have known I'd be speaking to you, interviewing people.
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I have to try something, let life take me there, open up ideas, next step, next step, next step.
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There's no path, right?
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Yeah, you're living proof of what it is.
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And maybe you'll talk to somebody who will send you in a completely different direction.
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And if they don't, so what?
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Then maybe it's good to stay where you are and dig in and get even better at it.
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There's so many chances that sort of flukes happen that open up things.
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If your eyes are open and you're looking for it, I think you can get something interesting if you're looking for it.
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Don't you?
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Yeah, but people don't know how to look.
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Maybe.
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A lot of people don't lead life following their heart.
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They follow what other people think is good.
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Right.
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They're waiting around to be told what to do.
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Did you yourself care a lot about what other people thought?
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Oh, I was a perfect people pleaser.
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I was really good at it.
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A lot of people go through life wishing they would have learned certain lessons sooner.
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What is a truth that you have learned about life that you wish more people understood?
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That most things just happen.
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You can't change them.
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If you could actually manage your life, then obviously you'd want to make as much money as you could and be as healthy as you could,
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but these things just happen.
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That even though they do not believe that they are worthy,
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that they have to try to do the best that they can, even though it seems impossible,
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and it was impossible, to try to do the best and not give up.
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I had a wonderful mother and she always would say things like everybody's a nice person until they show themselves differently.
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You know this is such a lovely country
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and in this country you can be anything you want to be
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but I want you to be kind and that stuck with me.
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She was always so complimentary, gave me a lot of self-confidence.
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I don't know if anybody agreed with her, but...
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The words people tell you is what you end up listening to?
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That's true.
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That's true.
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Even though somebody else might contradict that, it didn't really matter.
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Because then you start believing, because you heard it so much, that that's your opinion, and it doesn't matter to me what you think.
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What's a big mistake that you made, or a big regret that you have that taught you a valuable lesson?
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I think what I regret the most is not having the courage to be myself.
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I'm getting that.
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That's one of the benefits of being 93.
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I lost a lot by not being myself and by letting other people define stuff for me, that I shouldn't have let them do that.
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To the person who feels that way, who's watching, what do you say?
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The courage of your convictions.
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Try to have it.
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If you could go back in time to being 25 years old and you knew everything you knew today,
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you could give that version of yourself one piece of advice on living a good life.
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What would you say to her?
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Listen to yourself.
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What is it what I want and what I mean?
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Listen to yourself because it is the only thing you really have and you can change.
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Everything else is like rain.
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If you say go back up rain, it will not listen to you.
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Know yourself.
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You have the power.
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You'd be my age.
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I'm 25.
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Are you 25?
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Wow, that's amazing.
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That's great.
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Why is it great?
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Well, because you've done so much with yourself.
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You've got an interesting life for yourself and career.
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And I hadn't even thought of that at that time.
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I think I just had these sort of, they were okay jobs, but they were just sort of typing for somebody.
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This is my point.
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You are making a really interesting career for yourself, and you're well into it.
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Thank you.
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Basically, you've got to migrate back to yourself.
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You can't avoid being a people pleaser.
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So it's a journey back through that desire to be approved of and be loved to who you are.
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But just try to get in touch with yourself if it's possible.
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The years are short, yeah.
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So it reminds you, it brings you back to the self.
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And that's where you're going to learn.
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Reflect on what you're doing at this moment, because you're constantly rush, rush, rush.
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Get this done, get that.
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And you're multitasking until you can't stand yourself.
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The next thing you know, it's 30 years later, and there you are.
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Trying not to dwell on things too much.
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Some people do have very,
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very difficult lives, and they never let that aspect of that life go they hang on to it until they're 100.
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That's foolish.
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That was then.
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This is now.
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And when it starts getting good, and even if it's not all good,
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you don't hang on to all those things and you don't be so judgmental.
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Oh, this person doesn't belong here or this person doesn't look right.
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I don't want to sit with her.
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I just never had that kind of attitude.
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And maybe that's why I lived so long too.
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Thank you so much for watching this video.
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If you enjoyed it, guess what?
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We actually released the full length interview every single second of advice on our podcast channel, Seize of Success.
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You can check out the full interview by clicking the link right over here and subscribing.
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Thanks again and see you next week.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “I Asked 90 Year Olds for Life Advice and Learned..”. This video has 268 sentences and 2531 words to shadow. The speech runs for 15:55. The speaker talks at a natural 159 words per minute, close to everyday conversation. 88% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| lesson noun | /ˈlɛs.ən/ | A section of learning or teaching into which a wider learning content is divided. |
| regret verb | /ɹɪˈɡɹɛt/ | To feel sorry about (a thing that has or has not happened), afterthink: to wish that a thing had not happened, that something else had happened instead. |
| rush verb | /ɹʌʃ/ | To hurry; to perform a task with great haste, often not properly or without thinking carefully. |
| divorce noun | /dɪˈvɔːs/ | The legal dissolution of a marriage. |
| courage noun | /ˈkʌ.ɹɪd͡ʒ/ | The quality of being confident, not afraid or easily intimidated, but without being incautious or inconsiderate. |
| conviction noun | /kənˈvɪkʃən/ | A firmly held belief. |
| horrible adjective | /ˈhɔɹ.ɪ.bəl/ | Causing horror; terrible; shocking. |
| define verb | /dɪˈfaɪn/ | To determine with precision; to mark out with distinctness; to ascertain or exhibit clearly. |
| nightmare noun | /ˈnaɪt.mɛɚ/ | A very unpleasant or frightening dream. |
| ridiculous adjective | /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/ | Deserving of ridicule; foolish, absurd. |
| shock noun | /ʃɔk/ | A sudden, heavy impact. |
| compare verb | /kəmˈpɛɚ/ | To assess the similarities and differences between two or more things [“to compare X with Y”]. Having made the comparison of X with Y, one might have found it… |
| curious adjective | /ˈkjʊɹ.i.əs/ | Tending to ask questions, or to want to explore or investigate; inquisitive; (with a negative connotation) nosy, prying. |
| disappointed adjective | /ˌdɪsəˈpɔɪnɪd/ | Defeated of expectations or hope; experiencing disappointment; let down. |
| aspect noun | /ˈæspɛkt/ | Any specific feature, part, or element of something. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| open up verb | To open. | |
| end up verb | To bring to a conclusion. | |
| grow up verb | To mature and become an adult. | |
| pass away verb | To die. | |
| push around verb | To treat contemptuously and unfairly; to bully | |
| check out verb | To record the departure or withdrawal of someone or something (such as guests, employees, books, etc.). | |
| fall down verb | /fɔl ˈdaʊn/ | To fall to the ground. To collapse. |
| get out of verb | To leave, exit or escape from; to become free of. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- What's your date of birth?
- What leads you to be whatever age you are?
- Are you, were you married?
- How long were you guys together?
- Can you define the word love?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Conditional sentences if + clause, will/would + verb — a condition and its result | If I were your age, I'd really |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | Have you ever wondered · has changed · you've been |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | one who was · someone who was · friend who once |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | being obsessed · was set · be told |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 89 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, I'm, don't. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: rush /ɹʌʃ/, conviction /kənˈvɪkʃən/, shock /ʃɔk/, congratulations /kənˌɡɹæt͡ʃəˈleɪʃ(ə)nz/, foolish /ˈfuː.lɪʃ/
- Long words — get the stress right: ridiculous /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/, disappointed /ˌdɪsəˈpɔɪnɪd/, congratulations /kənˌɡɹæt͡ʃəˈleɪʃ(ə)nz/, differently /ˈdɪf.ə.ɹənt.li/, curiosity /ˌkjʊɹ.iˈɑ.sə.ti/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like lesson, regret, rush.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.