쉐도잉 연습: Those Who Are Terrified of Love - YouTube로 영어 말하기 배우기
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Here is an insight that if it was properly taught to us,
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Here is an insight that if it was properly taught to us,
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if there were classes in it at secondary school,
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could save us years, could help the economy,
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could make a major improvement to humankind.
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Instead, we keep the knowledge secret,
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so that in every generation,
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millions of people have to work their way through the painful mystery by themselves.
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It's as reckless as if we hit the secret of agriculture
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and made each new generation work out how to raise wheat by themselves.
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Surely the point of civilisation is to share knowledge and ensure
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that our successors can benefit from the pain and the hard-won insight of those who came before.
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It works when it comes to the secrets of pottery or physics.
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Why would we not do the same with love?
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So the insight is this.
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If you're a little unlucky,
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you are liable to come across someone in your love life who will be sweet
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and charming and tell you with great sincerity that they want a relationship.
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They will be extremely affectionate and focused on you, at first.
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They'll find nicknames and be tender towards small insecurities that others have missed.
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Naturally, in short order, you'll fall very in love with them.
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You'll start to imagine marriage in the very long term.
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You'll tell friends you've found the one.
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And then, over time, it could be six months or six years,
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probably not too much longer than that,
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something very hard to see will start to happen.
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Crises will emerge.
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They'll want to spend more time with their friends.
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They'll be busy at work.
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They'll discover a fascinating hobby,
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they'll grow irritable, they won't want to have sex anymore.
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Naturally, in such conditions, you'll reach for dialogue and imagine that this is just a momentary challenge.
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Let's talk about what's going on,
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how can we restore kindness and sweetness?
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You will try very hard.
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But the person who has been so lovely for so long won't properly engage.
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They may get irritable, they may deny that anything's up,
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they may come close again for a while and then the negative patterns will resume.
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There is something that they're not telling us,
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something that sounds so weird as to defy the ordinary workings of our minds.
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They are, let's put it this way, afraid of love.
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They don't want a relationship that actually works,
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in the sense of deepens.
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They thought they did, but the reality is appalling.
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However, they don't quite grasp this about themselves.
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Everything is happening at an instinctive level.
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They don't understand why they want to cause an argument, but they do.
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They don't know why they're staying out again without calling us, but they are.
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They couldn't say why they're irritable, but they are.
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They have a particular psychology.
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It's been called, usefully in some quarters, avoidant.
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Way back, as children, something happened to them.
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Such people are made and not born.
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They picked up an appalling suspicion.
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Other people are unsafe.
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Therefore, I need to be on my own.
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No one can own me.
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I need always to have an escape route.
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I don't want to be tied down.
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There's always a letdown that's going to come.
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And maybe even further in the recesses of their mind,
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I'm a little shit.
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I'm ugly.
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No one must get to the inner sanctum.
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Of course, none of this is said,
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it isn't even really known.
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What should be more widely taught is the danger of such people.
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They truly can make us lose decades and our minds.
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It doesn't make ordinary sense.
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Ordinary sense says two people who like each other move ever closer and make a life of it.
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But the annals of depth psychology say,
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one person who likes another may panic so
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that they move very subtly away without ever admitting
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that this is what they're doing and without even quite knowing it of themselves.
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What would a class on all this at secondary school advise?
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That if we ever meet such a person,
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and a quarter of the population does match this description,
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One must be very careful indeed not to get caught up in a web.
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One must give everyone a few chances to step forward and love us,
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and then if they don't,
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we must never ever stay around to do a PhD in Y.
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Four chances and then we're off.
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If we find ourselves after years in a hot and cold situation,
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we don't need to find out any more.
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Love should be essentially quite simple.
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And as soon as it gets complicated,
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it's a sign not of depth or romance or beauty,
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but of something far simpler and starker.
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That we are liable to have landed on a lover who is terrified of love.
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And therefore that we must,
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in very short order, to save ourselves, leave.
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인기 동영상
이번 수업에 대하여
이번 영상에서는 사랑에 대한 두려움과 그로 인한 관계의 복잡성을 짚어봅니다. 우리는 사랑의 진정한 본질과 그로 인해 발생할 수 있는 심리적 패턴을 이해함으로써, 보다 건강한 관계를 구축하는 데 필요한 통찰력을 배울 것입니다. 이 수업을 통해 사랑의 어려움에 직면했을 때 대처할 수 있는 방법을 익히고, 감정적으로 더 성숙한 대화를 나누는 데 도움이 될 것입니다.
핵심 어휘 및 표현
- 관계 (relationship)
- 두려움 (fear)
- 정신적 패턴 (psychological pattern)
- 대화 (dialogue)
- 애정 (affection)
- 불안정한 (unstable)
- 문제 (issue)
- 자기 이해 (self-understanding)
연습 팁
영상의 내용은 감정적인 주제가 포함되어 있어, 말의 속도와 톤을 주의 깊게 따라하는 것이 중요합니다. 영어 쉐도잉 기법을 활용하여, 화자의 발음을 그대로 따라 해보세요. 특히, 감정이 담긴 부분에서는 느린 속도로 연습하여 감정을 풍부하게 전달하는 연습을 해보는 것이 좋습니다. shadow speech를 적용하여, 가능한 한 화자의 억양과 리듬을 모방해 보세요. 영상에서 shadowspeaks를 활용해 자신만의 목소리로 그 감정을 표현하는 것도 좋은 연습입니다. 처음에는 단어 하나하나를 따라 해보며 시작하고, 나중에는 문장을 통째로 반복해 보세요. 일상 속 대화에서도 이러한 연습을 통해, 자연스러운 대화를 할 수 있는 기회를 늘려갈 수 있습니다.
쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법
쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.
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