Shadowing Practice: British People Never Say "I Like you" - They Do This Instead - Learn English Speaking with Video
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someone british once said to me god you're so annoying
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and i said thank you
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because i knew exactly what they meant in the uk there
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is a whole secret language running underneath what we actually say
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and if you don't know that language you will misread us and misunderstand us constantly.
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You'll think we hate you when we like you.
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You'll think we like you when we are furious with you.
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And you will spend years being baffled by a nation who apologize to items of furniture that they bump into,
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but who will absolutely never tell you they enjoy your company.
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Unless perhaps they are drunk but that's a video for another day.
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Today I am going to teach you the subtext of British communication.
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The real signs that someone British likes you and I promise you some of these will surprise you.
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Don't forget to check out the free pdfs that I offer.
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Links are in the description below.
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The first sign that someone British actually likes you, they start teasing you.
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Let me give you an example.
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Imagine this.
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You've been working somewhere for a few weeks, maybe a month or two.
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You walk into the office one morning and a colleague says, oh good, you're here.
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Now we can all collectively lower our standards together.
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The wrong reaction would be to take offense.
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The right reaction would be relief.
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Because this colleague has just told you in the most british way possible
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that they are comfortable with you we don't tease anybody we don't tease complete strangers
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that would be mortifying we tease people we've quietly decided
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that we like
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because it lets us show warmth without having to say anything
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as horrifying as i enjoy your company a good way to see it is as affection
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with plausible deniability and the key once again you probably know what i am going to say it's
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that word i always use yes the key is the tone
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if it is gentle a little absurd playful there is no real sting to it
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if it makes you both laugh you're in the second sign that someone british likes you they start complaining to you.
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Not about you.
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Again, that's different.
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Complaining to you.
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Complaining in the UK is intimacy.
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With strangers, we complain about safe things.
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The weather, train delays, the fact that there are now 17 types of oat milk and none of them froth properly.
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But when someone starts properly venting to you, that's a good word, vent.
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We often say, sorry for the vent.
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They start venting properly to you about their commute, their manager, their partner, anything, anything personal.
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That signals trust.
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They trust you enough to do that.
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They have decided that you will understand and that you will nod
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and look horrified in the right places you might even contribute your own grievances and indeed
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if someone starts venting to you you should it shows mutual
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trust you will spend a companionable 10 minutes getting quietly outraged together in short
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if someone is bringing you their problems even their petty ones they like you.
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The third sign is that the politeness starts to drop.
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When British people first meet you the politeness can almost be aggressive.
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Oh so sorry no sorry after you you go first.
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I'm so sorry could I trouble you for a pen?
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But the thing is very often that level of politeness is actually a form of distance.
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It's what we do with people we don't yet know how to be around.
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It's why also our voice our intonation goes up
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so much we talk really highly
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when we're being polite sorry would you mind possibly why I don't know we just do
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so when someone stops saying to you sorry would you mind
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or could you possibly
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and instead say something direct like can you move this they
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haven't become ruder they've become more comfortable with you you have
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moved from a person I must perform for to a person I can just talk to.
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And that is a promotion.
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Again, it means they like you.
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I will say this doesn't apply if someone is just rude from the beginning, that means they are just rude.
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The videos that I do are generalisations.
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Not every single British person is incredibly polite and indirect.
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These are general things to be aware of.
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The next sign is that they trust you with humour.
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British humour has a learning curve.
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It is mostly irony.
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Irony and sarcasm.
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Saying the opposite of what do you mean in a deadpan, dry way and then watching to see if the other person gets it.
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I unpack British humour more in this video if you are interested.
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You could cook someone a Michelin star masterpiece meal
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that has taken you hours and they might just nod and say in a deadpan way,
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well, it's not completely inedible.
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And that is a rave review.
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When a British person starts using that type of humour with you, it means something specific.
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They think you can handle it.
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They're not going to have to explain themselves.
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They can be slightly strange and you can be slightly strange back and that's absolutely fine.
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Neither of you needs to explain.
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That's a level of trust that can take some time to reach
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but once you've reached it there's no better stamp of approval than
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that trusting you with that kind of humor and the next signal
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if you're very lucky you will get the invitation a bunch of us are going to the pub this evening
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if you wanted to come we're doing a barbecue on sunday nothing fancy
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but you're welcome to come if you want or the most significant one.
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Shall we grab a cup of tea?
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Tea in the UK is never just tea.
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Tea is we sit down.
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We have time for each other.
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I want to hear what's going on in your life.
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That is what tea means.
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We will make tea for people we like.
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We will definitely make tea in a moment of crisis.
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And we will make tea
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when we have no idea what else we can do for you
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but we want you to know
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that we are there for you we will make you tea
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if someone puts the kettle on just for you you're in there we go
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if a British person teases you complains to you stops being excessively polite around you
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and trusts you with their quirky sense of humor
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or invites you for tea
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or a pint they like you although they almost certainly won't say
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that obviously they might say yeah you're all right
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or yeah i don't mind spending time with you they might
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say nothing at all just refill your mug without you having to ask
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but they will know and now so will you
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if you are more interested in british culture make sure you
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look at this playlist where i go into more details about british culture
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and what it means here don't forget to check out your
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free pdfs links are below as well as details of online lessons
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and courses with me have a wonderful rest of your day and I will see you in the next one, hopefully.
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Bye.
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Woordenschat en spreektips bij deze les
Deze spreekles is gebaseerd op de video “British People Never Say "I Like you" - They Do This Instead”. Deze woorden komen het vaakst terug: british, tea, trust, sign. Deze video bevat 116 zinnen en 1221 woorden om na te spreken. Het gesproken deel duurt 8:06. De spreker praat in een natuurlijk tempo van ongeveer 151 woorden per minuut, dicht bij een alledaags gesprek. 86% van de woorden hoort bij de 3.000 meest gebruikte Engelse woorden; de rest kun je beter vooraf bekijken.
Belangrijke woorden in deze video
15 woorden uit de video die het leren waard zijn, met uitspraak en betekenis:
| Woord | Uitspraak | Betekenis |
|---|---|---|
| humour zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈhjuːmɚ/ | humor |
| complain werkwoord | /kəmˈpleɪn/ | klagen |
| rude bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /ɹuːd/ | grof, onbeschoft |
| polite bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /pəˈlaɪt/ | beleefd |
| stranger zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈstɹeɪnd͡ʒɚ/ | vreemde, vreemdeling |
| colleague zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈkɒliːɡ/ | collega, medewerker |
| irony zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈaɪ.ɚ.ni/ | ironie |
| tone zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈtəʊn/ | toon, noot |
| meal zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈmiːl/ | maaltijd |
| lesson zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈlɛs.ən/ | les |
| promotion zelfstandig naamwoord | /pɹəˈmoʊʃn̩/ | promotie, bevordering |
| delay zelfstandig naamwoord | /dɪˈleɪ̯/ | vertraging, oponthoud |
| contribute werkwoord | /kənˈtɹɪb.jut/ | bijdragen |
| aggressive bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /əˈɡɹɛs.ɪv/ | agressief |
| invite werkwoord | /ɪnˈvaɪt/ | uitnodigen, nodigen |
Phrasal verbs die je zult horen
| Woord | Betekenis |
|---|---|
| check out werkwoord | onderzoeken |
| sit down werkwoord | gaan zitten |
Zinnen om te herhalen
Korte, volledige zinnen uit de video die je in alledaagse gesprekken kunt gebruiken:
- You'll think we hate you when we like you.
- I'm so sorry could I trouble you for a pen?
- Shall we grab a cup of tea?
Grammatica in deze video
De structuren die de spreker het meest gebruikt, met de exacte woorden uit de video:
| Structuur | In de video |
|---|---|
| Voorwaardelijke zinnen if + zin, will/would + werkwoord — een voorwaarde en het gevolg | if you're very lucky you will get |
| Present perfect have/has + voltooid deelwoord — iets uit het verleden dat nu nog telt | has just told · have decided · haven't become |
| Lijdende vorm be + voltooid deelwoord — het gaat om wat er gebeurt, niet om wie het doet | being baffled · are drunk |
Uitspraak om op te letten
De spreker gebruikt 28 samentrekkingen en verkorte vormen, zoals don't, you're, we're. Spreek ze kort uit, zoals je ze hoort.
- De “th”-klanken: underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/, warmth /wɔɹmθ/, froth /ˈfɹɒθ/
- De klanken “sh” en “zh”: ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, promotion /pɹəˈmoʊʃn̩/, invitation /ɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/, affection /əˈfɛk.ʃən/, intonation /ɪntəˈneɪʃən/
- Lange woorden — let op de klemtoon: ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, incredibly /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/, apologize /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/, invitation /ɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/, intimacy /ˈɪn.tɪ.mə.si/
Klanken die Nederlandstaligen lastig vinden:
- Stemhebbende eindmedeklinker — /b/, /d/, /g/, /z/, /v/ niet verscherpen: tease /tiːz/, rude /ɹuːd/, colleague /ˈkɒliːɡ/, aggressive /əˈɡɹɛs.ɪv/, apologize /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/
- /æ/ — opener dan de Nederlandse “e”: fancy /ˈfæn.si/, stamp /stæmp/, masterpiece /ˈmæstɚˌpis/, sarcasm /ˈsɑːɹˌkæzəm/, deadpan /ˈdɛdpæn/
- /g/ — een harde plofklank, geen Nederlandse “g”: colleague /ˈkɒliːɡ/, aggressive /əˈɡɹɛs.ɪv/, grievance /ˈɡɹiː.vəns/
Zo oefen je met deze video
- Luister de hele video één keer zonder te spreken en noteer de woorden die je niet kent.
- Begin op 0,75× snelheid, spreek zin voor zin na en ga terug naar normale snelheid zodra het makkelijk gaat.
- Neem jezelf op en vergelijk met het origineel; let daarbij op woorden als humour, complain, rude.
Wat is de Shadowing-techniek?
Shadowing is een wetenschappelijk onderbouwde taalleermethode die oorspronkelijk is ontwikkeld voor professionele tolkentraining en gepopulariseerd door polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. De methode is eenvoudig maar krachtig: je luistert naar native Engelse audio en herhaalt het onmiddellijk hardop — als een schaduw die de spreker volgt met slechts 1–2 seconden vertraging. In tegenstelling tot passief luisteren of grammaticadrills, dwingt shadowing je hersenen en mondspieren om echte spraakpatronen tegelijkertijd te verwerken en te reproduceren. Onderzoek toont aan dat het de uitspraaknauwkeurigheid, intonatie, ritme, verbonden spraak, luisterbegrip en spreekvaardigheid aanzienlijk verbetert — waardoor het een van de meest effectieve methoden is voor IELTS Speaking-voorbereiding en echte Engelse communicatie.