Shadowing Practice: 60. Dating Dealbreakers, Ashley Madison, & Bennifer - Learn English Speaking with Video

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welcome to another episode of out of the pods i'm dt

and i'm natalie

and we are in dp's apartment i swear to god it's winter up in here why is it

so cold well i i don't like the heat

i go from ac to ac baby i keep it at 68 at all times is

that 68 yeah i feel like it's weird i have to first of all i can't sleep

if it's not 68 like if and if the fan's not going like

if it's winter

and it's like 10 degrees out my fan will still be on you are joking no

i'm serious during the winter time i will adjust like

because i won't turn on the heat

because you know i'm frugal af i was literally about to say

that you're so frugal that you're like what's the most cost effective temperature no literally

that that's me

and i was like how do i like you know like conserve energy up in this joint

so like in the winter time like i will sleep in like 67 68

because it gets pretty cold i'm on the like 40th floor of an apartment building our apartment building

so like my place gets chilly and it's floor to ceiling window

so it gets extra chilly it does get chilly

but then in the summertime I will let my apartment get to like 75 degrees

sometimes 78 I will sit in there so that my body adjusts

so when I like walk outside I'm not like it doesn't feel

that hot you know yeah I I understand

because you're like letting your body acclimate but I'm like nope

because wherever I'm going I hope there's an AC honestly that's crazy you know what this adds up though

because every time we're filming at your apartment plus we have lights up too you know yeah

and i'm like fucking burning in

that bit well we have to turn off the ac

because the ones in our apartment building are

so loud they sound like a ghost yeah and weirdly i've adjusted to

that noise and

if i don't have it like i can't fall asleep no

i need the fan noise are you people are like

that you need a fan noise because

or like white noise yeah thank you for

that explanation i suppose i can't wait to go back to my apartment that's a cool nice

and like comfortable 75

that sounds miserable please hang out with me do i've been um

you you know who billy eilish is right yeah of course

so she just came out with a new album and i'm

so good it's so good this entire morning i've been listening blasting it

and just you know cleaning whatever

and it made me think about how she did a shout out to me back in the day oh

you talked about this on the podcast dude i am going back

this october to chicago like she's coming to chicago and i am so excited

and i'm hoping for another shout out from billy

you're gonna tag her 20 times she's like i'm not i'm not reposting this bitch again

so if you guys don't know um billy eilish reposted deep d story

and she was like deep d with like a smiley face it was like a little crying face oh oh

so billy eilish watched her season of love is wine honestly

i wonder what she thought about shake she probably clearly hates him

and then especially with this new album she like is very much talking about her sexuality

and she's into women she's like i could eat

that girl for lunch and i'm like billy

so we're getting like a really vulnerable billy

that's what i say to my salad i was like i could eat you

wait when i'm cutting up my tomatoes i was like i was like about to eat you

but do you ever talk to your food no

but i do talk to plants like you pretend your food has like feelings so

when i'm like chopping up like some tomatoes

i'm like i'm about to eat you little babies little baby tomatoes

that's sinister that's actually really sinister wait no one does this this has to be normal

that's not like you know when you like keep yourself entertained yeah like

when i cut up some carrots i'm like yeah

if you're five you are you are 31 ma 'am 32

i'm sorry 32 you're welcome see look at me do i look 31 though you do you look 25

you don't do that for real no that's the weirdest thing i've ever heard like

when you put little pasta shells in boiling water

you're like no absolutely you like act like you are a monster

and you're putting you know like

if pot okay yeah i think you need this weird no

it's not weird i think it's kind of no i know

but is this is is this like you know like saying something about me like psychologically

it is like i'm unwell a little bit

i was about to tell you you need to get out of your apartment

and you need to make some new friends i have no friends

that i talk to my food i mean please don't make any new friends

and be like i can't wait to cut you up i don't like

when i cut the tomatoes to put into like you know with the lettuce like into the bowl

i'm always like you're joining your friends

the funniest part about this not like out loud

but in my mind i'm not like that crazy

but in my mind i'm like oh concocting a story got

it it's internal about how i'm about to eat these live

you know fruits and vegetables okay

because i literally just pictured

you at your kitchen like talking to your veggies be like i can't wait to cut you up no

that voice is what happens but in my head

because that'd be weird if i just said it out loud

and sometimes going back to like being kind of crazy

i pretend i'm on a cooking show do you ever do

that that i love like i pretend i'm like martha stewart no honestly

and i was like this is my favorite dish even though i'm making for the first time

i'd be like i make this i've been making this since i was 12.

and again this is all internal dialogue sometimes sometimes some words come out no um me

and my mom used to watch cooking shows all the time growing up so

that was my favorite thing ever i was like oh my god

i want my own cooking show oh yeah i thought i could be rachel ray i remember watching

that woman and being like rachel i'm coming for your job

100

and i was like 10 years old i like that i like that ambition

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look at me now yeah look at you know rachel watch out

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this podcast is the step for me to take her job is she even on food network anymore

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i don't think so but she does like

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so many celebrity like i don't

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i don't who watches the food network anymore like i feel like no one watches cable

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yeah that's true i don't even have cable same

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i don't even watch tv i realized i have i pay for youtube tv

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but i barely watch it but just in case there's like a sporting event

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or like a award ceremony

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i'm like i don't want to be scrambling to figure out where i go watch it

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so i'm like i need

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that is this gonna get me in trouble you don't do like the free trial over

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and over again i but like how many new email address can i have unlimited unlimited infinity in my book

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i probably have 16 you're such a little scammer no i love a good free trial that's my favorite thing

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but i just don't want to keep track of all those email addresses i think it's too much for me

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so what i do is i won't say the email address i use

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but i just change the last number

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so it's like bam bam bam one bam bam bam two bam bam bam three

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and then you go to 16 17 18 i'm sure i'm gonna go up to 100 oh my god is

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that so bad that's so that's it seems

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so inconvenient you know always delete an email like you could get rid of it

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so it's not like you're like an email address hogger yeah

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but you always are not hoarding all these emails yeah

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but you always have to provide a credit card

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and i'm like that's too much effort my for an email my purse is way over no

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when you do a free trial oh yeah you know what that's where you got me

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because i'm like i'm sorry i'm not getting up

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i i mean look i will get up for the 9 .99 i'm gonna save okay well

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but i'm pretty sure youtube tv

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or what is it called yeah it's youtube tv isn't

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that 49 a month something like that but But I also let my parents.

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That's so crazy.

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I know, but I let my parents use it.

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So as long as somebody in the family is using it, I'm like, cool.

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Because they came up with this new thing because my brother was the one paying for it.

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But it's like, you're not in your location.

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And I'm like, well, duh, he's in Texas.

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I'm over here.

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Oh, my God.

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Capitalism.

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That's why you need to scheme the system, man.

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See, that's why YouTube is smart.

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Yeah, we don't like capitalism.

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Yeah, I don't.

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I don't.

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It hurts my soul the fact that, oh, my gosh, I went to Whole Foods

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and I had to pay $3 for a cucumber for was it organic yes an organic english cucumber i love

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but i was like why why has it gotten to this

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point our ancestors would be like three dollars for a cucumber it's

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because we live in the concrete jungle

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if we lived like for example my parents live in the burbs they have

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so much like fresh stuff growing

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they have like where like in their bur in their at their house

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they have like a little garden you can like grow your own things

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i mean they're not growing english cucumbers well that's what i'm saying well

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when they go to whole foods to buy one it's gonna be three actually it's 3 .99 yeah

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that shook me to my core i i put

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that cucumber back i was like you know what i don't even need

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this cucumber i was like you it's not even worth

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it no that's crazy that's what sucks about america in general right now is

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that like processed foods like is

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so much cheaper than fresh foods like it's it pay

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it's like expensive to be healthy yeah like instant ramen was 99 cents

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so did I buy that instead yeah and did I eat

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that for dinner instead of my cucumbers hell yeah

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I did I have the funniest story for you yes tell me okay

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so I was talking to my guy friend I better laugh

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so hard at this story okay like lower your expectations

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because the way I deliver it I'm not sure

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but okay tell me why I was talking to him

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and he is like out there in the streets dating he's like a little flirty butterfly

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I would say oh I've seen yeah you know yeah

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I know exactly who you're talking about tell me why this man the other day we were talking about relationships

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and I'm like hey like why aren't you like in relationships like clearly

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you find really wholesome good girls yeah he's really good looking he is vivacious

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If I hear you say vivacious one more time, I will lose it.

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I use that word very sparingly, though.

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But he is very, like, vivacious and charismatic.

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Very good looking.

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Nothing about this man is vivacious.

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He was on a Facebook group called Are We Dating the Same People?

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Yeah.

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And then he got so excited because it was a positive thing on there.

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He goes, look at me.

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I'm wholesome as hell.

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Someone posted his photo in this Facebook group.

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I don't know exactly what it's called.

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Is it Are We Dating the Same Men?

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Are We Dating the Same Guy?

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Okay.

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And it's Chicago -based.

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and people are like no but he is

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so hot like oh my gosh like so good looking

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and he was thrilled about it he was like showing off about it

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so thrilled but he's a good looking guy

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if I'm just setting the stage yeah yeah no he's a good guy

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and that's why I'm always like bro date this girl like she's

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so cute and she's like would get along with your family

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so well blah blah blah

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and he told me the reason why he would never date her is

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because she has a dog

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and normally he's not like a oh I'm not a dog guy like he loves dogs

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but this man is like a clean freak like everything in his apartment is spotless anytime

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we come over like shoes off at the front door every time we leave he's like swiffering

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and cleaning and disinfecting everything so he's like

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that type of dude shoes off at the front door he sounds Asian no that's why I was like

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so like surprised when he told me that

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because I'm like yeah we as Asians do not wear shoes in the house

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but Americans love to do

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that shit like one of my other girlfriends she'll wear shoes on the couch on the bed

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and I'm like this is like against my culture like against my tradition okay

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this is illegal okay I don't need to be like stereotypical right now

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or generalize on you know race or ethnicity yeah

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but I will say a lot of my white friends allow shoes in the house yeah

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and that's your prerogative do whatever you want

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but in this household nope nope nope nope

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and same with same with my friend

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and he he goes okay one time she came over with her dog

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and already i was paranoid freaking out

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because he's like has his paws everywhere running around

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and then apparently he shut the bedroom door

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so the dog couldn't come inside

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because he's like there's no chance in hell the dog is going to be on the bed

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which i do not agree with that but anyways

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so apparently the dog was like trying to get in

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and started scratching the door and he owns his place

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so he's like he was pissed he lived

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when he woke up the next day and after

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that he was just like yeah I'm done I don't think

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I can ever see you again you are kidding what the heck

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I lost my cool I was like get him a like a not a crate

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but like maybe like a little playpen area or something

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and he goes no there's it's a non -negotiable for me i was like

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that okay okay i want to call him insane

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but oh i hate saying this i feel like this podcast makes me look

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so bad that i'm just gonna say it i'm like

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that too i know i know

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you are that's why i feel like you would resonate with this like guys i'm

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so bad that if there's someone i don't know in my home

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which there has been remember one time i was hanging out with deep these friends

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and they were with a friend that i had never met before yeah

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and i don't know how they all ended up at my place i know how i kind of orchestrated

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that did you i was like everyone come over to my place

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and she goes oh do you mind

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if we go to natalie's she's a few floors up this is

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so bad and i know some of my friends listen

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so sorry about this but literally they were on the way up to my floor

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and i was like go to natalie's and they're knocking on my door

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and i'm sitting here silently i was like do not come in do not

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so terrible and then i'm literally taking a shit

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and someone's like boom boom boom boom and i was like

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so scared and i was just like quietly sitting on my toilet being like you know

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when you're like are the cops here it's like i don't know what to do yeah

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that was not my bad and then i come out i was like hello i just

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and my door was unlocked and they just barged in as i'm taking a shit oh

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Oh my gosh.

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And I got so scared.

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Oh no. But then I heard their voices and I was like, oh, it's deep, these annoying ass friends.

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I was like, nothing to worry about here.

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Hey, they're your friends too now.

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We're in this together, bitch.

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Look, for like, you know, just simplifying the storytelling, I'm just trying to make it like clear.

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Anyway, so there's a friend I didn't know.

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This is so horrible for me to admit, but because I wasn't sure

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if he's someone who washes his hands often after he uses the bathroom i was

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so cautious to see where he was touching like i was like okay

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he touched my refrigerator handles okay he opened one of my drawers

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and in my head i'm like i have to disinfect those areas

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when they all leave that is

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so funny that's exactly how my friend is too that's why he he doesn't take any chances

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because there's so many of us all the time

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and that's our meeting spot he cleans the entire apartment every sunday morning because we leave saturday night ish

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So every Sunday morning, he's like, I know you touched everything in here.

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That's actually so crazy that you did that.

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Is that so crazy?

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That's wild.

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I don't know what's wrong with my brain.

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I mean, I kind of do, but like, no, that's how my brain works.

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That's actually.

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Yeah.

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It's so.

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And literally when you guys all left, I know I got a few drinks with you guys when I came back home.

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Yeah.

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I cleaned everything.

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Like places where I know you guys didn't even step, but I was like, maybe all the spit like from everyone talking like kind of settled

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that is places that is how do you live life

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because your brain is just like crazy yeah

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you're like I don't need friends that's why she talks to her vegetables

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and you know you know where I got

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this from my dad my dad is the same exact way

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his brain works the same exact way the thing is he's never shared the way his brain works yeah

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and I told him about it he goes oh my gosh I feel

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so bad because my brain works the same way yeah

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and he goes did I do this to you no

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he feels like it's a curse no I'm sure he like growing up you probably watched his behaviors

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and like kind of like followed suit

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and plus yeah your brain is probably wired that way too

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so you're like oh yep I'm cleaning everything just like

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that it's it's like nuts okay that is that's

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so crazy he's like that yeah I'm like

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that too a pet is a deal breaker for me yeah I think honestly

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if you can't love someone's pet the way they love them get out of

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that relationship yeah because you can never have a potential partner choose you

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or the pet exactly because it's like they're babies like loving a stepchild yes like

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if you can't love that stepchild like your own you got to get out honestly exactly exactly

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and i think what would i know it comes in a package deal yeah

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and i just know like having a dog

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or i know he doesn't live with me right now

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but having a dog like

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if someone didn't like pixel i would be like i don't like you bro like get the fuck out

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and i never want to see you again like it's

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that serious so what

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so what excuse did he use just he just slow faded oh my god a little bit ish

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because like they weren't like in a relationship

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or anything they were just in the talking stages yeah and

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so when he brought the dog or when she brought the dog over that's

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when he was like i don't think

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i can do this anymore like you're not wifey material anymore okay i feel like it would have been

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so much better if he just told her like hey like it's your dog yeah for slow fading

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because then she's like what's wrong with me yeah uh

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you know what there's a lot of layers to this friend

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i'm like he's he definitely um i try to tell him

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that but he's like nah that's not worth my time

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but i you know what i think it's

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so funny maybe we'll do um a segment in the future on the pod

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and ask our pod besties like what are some reasons what are some crazy reasons you've broken up with somebody.

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I think that would be so funny.

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People are petty.

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People are so petty.

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People will break up over the way someone breathes at night.

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I could imagine that people will probably break up with me as soon as they see that I wear a mouth tape.

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They'd be like, I mean, I want to end our friendship over that, too.

333

It's good for my health and improves my.

334

Yeah, it also makes you look like literally an Avenger.

335

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336

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351

I feel like we have to talk about this, but the Ashley Madison documentary that is on Netflix right now,

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Deep D asked me to watch it.

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And you guys know, like I don't watch shows, but this one was crazy.

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It was so good.

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First of all, when I first texted you about it, you're like, isn't that that thing that happened a while ago?

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And it's so funny, but I didn't hear anything about it until this documentary came out.

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Yeah.

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So I heard about it when I was in middle school or high school,

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but it was this huge hacking scandal that happened with the site Ashley Madison, which was this dating site for married people. So crazy.

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Their tagline is what life is short, have an affair.

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Yeah.

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So it's crazy, but

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So the reason why I had heard about it is

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because two of my classmates' dads were exposed for being on that site.

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That's, oh my God, I kind of got chills from that. That sucks.

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So if you guys don't know what I'm talking about, someone hacked this site and you were able to look up who belonged to the site,

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signed up for the site that allows you to have affairs with other married people secretly.

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Yeah.

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And it's insane because it was such an impactful hack probably the most impactful in history of hacking

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because everyone was on a witch hunt

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because they're like oh let me find out about my neighbors like my friend's dad's like

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so they just would like

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and there was what I think by the end of it 36 million users

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which is such a big population of people

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that is crazy no that's insane to me

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and I was just was thinking about it like it sucks

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because watching the documentary I realized people don't want to end their marriage

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they just want extracurricular activities on the side one of the couples

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that are highlighted in this documentary where the husband used ashley madison

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and cheated yeah you know he talks about how he's like i just went

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because i was like bored and wanted just like attention

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so he's chatting with all these women yeah

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and it's like he's trying to build some sort of like get some emotional attention

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so that's the thing he he said too he was like yes it was for attention

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but this guy the christian dad had he was a christian dad he was a christian dad

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and it was like a christian couple that's the that's the image

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that they portrayed um on social media as well

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because they had like a little bit of a following

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they were doing they had a platform yeah they were doing vlogs

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and stuff like that so people were like so bought into them

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and their lifestyle and everything they stood for

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but then you find out this dad is on this site

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and he was like honestly once I got the social media platform I stopped using Ashley Madison

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because he wanted to feel loved or like wanted the attention

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so I was like oh yeah but can I tell you the plot twist of

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that story and sorry if this is a uh spoiler

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so spoiler alert but at the end of it he they she forgave him the wife forgave him

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and they're still together to this day

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and I was like wow wow crazy crazy crazy

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but honestly i feel like the human psychology behind having an affair

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or cheating is so interesting to me because obviously i've been cheated on

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and i did come from a place of understanding with him

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and i was like oh like i understand why you did this

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because our relationship was going x y and z way right

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or and and also because he's a weak man yeah honestly yes

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because he was insecure he was you know weak man needs some validation has no morals truly truly

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but it is there's a side of me

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that understands it I think it's fucked up beyond belief

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but I'm like there's probably so many secrets

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that people like have see I don't understand cheaters oh

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I know you do not no I just don't like I just

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because it takes a lot of like a lot of steps to get to cheating like think about ashley madison

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it's very premeditated

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premeditated yeah um like yeah you have to sign up for the site

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you have to put your credit card information in you have

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to start swiping on women start chatting with them for this site for ashley madison

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you had to i think get credits to chat with different women yep

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you got to get their number meet up with them like all this stuff

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and it's like that's not one mistake that's like a thousand mistakes

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that led to the ultimate like betrayal for me

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so I want to be understanding like I get the reasons why people say they cheated

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when they reflect back but I'm like

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I think that you have to be super weak

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and not respect your partner to cheat right the harder thing to do is

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when you're having feelings like of stepping out of your marriage to stop yourself from doing it

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and seek therapy or seek help or talk to your spouse

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and be like this is what I'm feeling instead

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when you betray somebody break their trust

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and go behind their back that's the fucked up part it's not

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that you're having feelings

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that hey I want to have exciting sex with somebody else yeah yeah

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that's kind of human nature considering there's 36 million people who signed up for this site

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so it's crazy clearly a common thing

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but it's how you handle it you're right it's like you are weak

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if you're gonna buy into it you're strong

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if you're like oh like i want to do this

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but i know

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that i can't you know it's yeah yeah

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that's the it is it's crazy honestly what's even more fucked up about this whole situation is the fact

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that this company duped them

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so much half the time they said they were just talking to bots

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or employees of ashley Madison because not enough women signed up

443

There was this woman who got interviewed for the documentary

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and she she's like an adult film star

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and randomly she would see men just coming up to her at the strip club

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that she worked at and they would just be like, here's some flowers.

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And she's like, what the hell?

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Like and since it happened so frequently, she's like, why are you guys coming to me?

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Like, what is this from?

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She goes, aren't I talking to you on Ashley Madison?

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And she's like, no, I'm not on Ashley Madison.

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So they like duped everyone it's that is

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so crazy oh it's a huge scandal okay so actually i had to report this facebook page

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someone was using my photos

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and like talking to men like scamming men trying to like get them to pay yeah

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because i had men did i ever tell you about this no

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i don't think you did okay it was like very like it wasn't a big deal

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but this is

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when the show came out it was probably like a few months after our season came out

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but i had men messaging me being like oh like finally

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i'm able to find out who you are like blah blah blah like what's your address

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i want to send you this thing

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and i was like what the fuck is going on like you know how we get

464

it anyways where there's like some men being like are you looking for your sugar sugar daddy

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you want to be my sugar baby i was getting like 500 messages a day

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and i was like what is going on and it was like

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when i was reading these messages

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they were acting like they were like we had talked before okay yeah it's very strange

469

and I was like what the heck is going on

470

and then I saw like in some of these messages

471

they would say like oh I messaged you on Facebook how come

472

you're not answering me on Facebook oh my god

473

so I looked myself up on Facebook and I don't have a Facebook account

474

but I found a profile that was using my photos

475

and the name was Natalie Lee which is my full name but it was spelled incorrectly

476

but I was like okay like let me click on this profile all my photos um

477

and I could see how many friends they had

478

and who it was public and it was like 2 ,000 men just oh my god just like

479

yeah and she would post photos

480

and I could see the public comments like people commenting on these photos who whoever I keep saying she

481

but like who knows who it was yeah and yeah

482

so someone was like using my photos to scam men that's insane

483

because first of all you don't get any of these perks

484

but she's using your pictures out or her yeah whoever yeah

485

but it was so gross and the captions were like like look at my sexy tits

486

and i was like first of all i was like

487

i was like what tits

488

and it's like a photo of me in a bathing suit i'm done okay i'm flatter than a table

489

but but the crazy part is whoever was using my photos photoshopped my chest to be bigger that's insane

490

because the audacity to first steal your pictures

491

and then photoshop you is like i wasn't even good enough that's so bad

492

but i'm not gonna lie i was like no i know

493

that's actually kind of flattering i was like wow someone actually used my photos to scam I was like,

494

I was like, wow, I was like, am I good enough?

495

That's actually really shady, but I wasn't good enough in that much because she had to Photoshop my photos.

496

That's so wild.

497

Don't lie to me.

498

Did you did you send your address for some gifts?

499

I mean, did the thought cross my mind?

500

I was going to say out of the 500.

501

What if he's like, I got you a Tesla?

502

It was just like so icky.

503

I was like, what is going on? i just reported the profile though

504

and then it got shut down i think like a week later wait was this pre -show

505

or post -show post -show oh it was post -show

506

that is ballsy because you're clearly a public figure at

507

that point that's how all these men found me yeah that's wild yeah that's crazy

508

because there's probably so many men out there

509

that fantasize about you ew well they fantasize about my photoshopped body okay well yeah

510

and you know natalie with bigger tits i love you know

511

i love a good face you know i love a good photoshop once in a

512

while you know like look i'm i'm not above

513

it like what are you gonna do like i have insecurities

514

too everyone does whoever had the scammy facebook profile of me made my body look

515

so crazy i was so skinny it was like all my photos just photoshopped that's

516

so funny you look at it you're like is

517

that even me she even photoshopped my own face

518

and some of them and i was like she made my eyes bigger

519

and i was like not i was like not too bad listen this wasn't personal this is a business

520

and she had to get that money honey

521

so you know what i'm just kidding i'm not i don't condone

522

that behavior that's not good he's like well on the bright side of things is

523

that nuts no that's actually not so wow i'm glad you figured it out

524

and shut it down it was pretty easy

525

yeah they weren't very smart about it that's why i'm like

526

if you're gonna like scam people like be smarter maybe

527

that's not the tagline no no that's not the tagline

528

i almost sounded like ashley madison life is short having a fair like what a tagline though what a tagline

529

and one of the guys

530

that got interviewed for it they were like why did you do it

531

and goes well they were right about the fact

532

that life is short so they have to be

533

that right about the fact that have an affair I was like

534

that is the most that's the dumbest mentality I've ever heard it does get me really freaked out

535

that 36 or 37 million people signed up for this

536

because I think it shows like how many people really do cheat yeah

537

I saw a study somewhere where I think it said

538

uh like one out of three people in relationships cheat yeah

539

or have the intention to cheat

540

which is insane no it really is there's two of us in this room and if there's another person

541

it could be that one no that's actually kind of insane to me

542

because obviously you and i would never

543

because we've been cheated on we just are not wired

544

that way it does seem like predominantly it's it is more men who are on the website

545

but can i just say

546

i have a hot take on this i feel like in the next 200 300 years open relationships

547

i think are going to be way more common i wouldn't say it would be a majority

548

but i feel like they're going to be i don't even know again i was thinking about

549

that i don't know if it's necessarily polygamy

550

because polygamy is like oh i'm going to be married to multiple people

551

i'm going to have a relationship with multiple people whereas an open relationship is i'm going to be married

552

or in a relationship with one person

553

but we're able to have sexual interactions with other people outside of our marriage

554

and i think that's going to become more common again

555

it's my hot take i feel like i feel like murders are going to go up

556

if that's the case that's scary because jealousy is a real real thing

557

and jealousy makes some people crazy no it does well anyways we

558

if you haven't watched the ashley madison documentary definitely do let us know your thoughts

559

because for me it was kind of crazy but speaking about relationships

560

that are headed to the end like the ones

561

that we saw in ashley madison um j -lo

562

and ben affleck might be headed towards a separation according to some sources for the what the hundredth time

563

it would be their second but anyways there are rumors

564

that j -lo jennifer lopez and ben um don't live together right now

565

so he moved out of their marital home

566

and neither are commenting on their relationship status yeah so interesting

567

and he didn't attend the premiere for her new movie atlas oh i didn't know

568

that he didn't attend yeah so he didn't 10 for the two movie premieres oh

569

that kind of is sad yeah but honestly what are you i

570

when they announced that they got married and

571

so quickly after their relationships ended i think it was like right after a -rod

572

that j -lo got into this relationship with ben i was like i don't know like the timeline of

573

when they recently started dating and got engaged

574

but they were previously engaged in the early 2000s

575

but they were previously engaged in the 2000s in um 2002 yeah

576

and they called off their wedding in 2003 yeah

577

and then they you know obviously got married in 2022

578

so a little less than 20 years later that's okay most would look at that

579

and be like oh they like it just was about timing they just needed you know to go through life

580

and then they'll come back together

581

but no you guys

582

this is literally like talk about marrying your back burner person

583

like you know how no matter what you do in life you always have

584

that person on the back burner that you go back to like do not marry

585

that person you there's a reason why you're not in a relationship with

586

that person literally what is happening what i took from this

587

is don't get back with your ex never like even

588

when 20 years has passed and you think

589

that they have changed just don't get back together with them no like in the past is in the past

590

you know what i'm saying yeah and especially

591

if you're in hollywood like it's such a big deal like you're in the public eye like don't

592

it just is so messy but can i just tell you i don't know

593

if you watched the roast of tom brady no i didn't

594

so tell me why i had no idea on netflix i had no idea

595

that ben affleck was gonna be a roaster but he came on stage

596

and he starts talking about social media

597

and he like kind of says oh like when me

598

and tom did the dunkin donuts commercial i looked at his social media

599

and people were just like you know saying mean things on there blah blah blah

600

but like as the speech went on you could tell he's not talking about tom brady like

601

that man is talking about j -lo

602

because i don't think he cares enough about himself

603

if people are talking about him on social media but definitely

604

that was about j -lo i was like j -lo did you write this like what happened

605

but basically j -lo is getting a lot of heat Eat on social media oh

606

i've seen yeah a lot do you remember

607

that people are making fun of her it's

608

so bad especially the video of her like messing with her hair and being like yeah like i'm from

609

harlem like no the bronx she's like this reminds me of a time

610

when i was just running around the bronx people are like jlo

611

and everyone's stitching it and making fun of her for it

612

and it sucks i it does suck

613

but like she doesn't have a good reputation of being like nice

614

so people are just like going in on her

615

but you can tell that it's affecting her so i think

616

that he did that entire speech just to be like you guys behind your keyboard warriors

617

if you saw me face to face

618

you wouldn't say shit to me would you that's what he said no

619

that's literally basically what he said you have to go watch

620

that specific section well she said she said

621

that her initial split from back in the early 2000s it was caused by like just like the media

622

and people talking about them oh yeah

623

so she's definitely like someone who gets impacted by the comment

624

and that's something

625

that ben also said too at one point of like you

626

know like i think j -lo is very aware of what people say about her yeah um

627

but there was a source

628

that said um the biggest issue in their relationship right now is she has a hard time feeling satisfied

629

so this year alone she came out with a new album she also came out with a self -financed movie

630

and then also a self -financed documentary

631

can i just tell you all three of them are

632

so bad i watched a clip from her movie no i know i've seen the

633

and she's like oh it was

634

so bad i was like what is happening here honestly it's interesting

635

that celebrities look at social media because i feel like

636

when you're at the status that ben Affleck

637

and JLo are like I wouldn't give a shit about reading comments

638

or like being in that space I just be like damn I'm making

639

so much money like I'm gonna try to live a happy life like away from

640

that but it humanizes them so much to me because I'm like

641

Ben are you reading oh

642

Pedro Pascal did a lie detector test yeah and he said that

643

when he's feeling down

644

he goes to look at his fan accounts oh for a

645

little boost yeah for a little boost see people like him no JLo I'm like

646

that that strategy won't work for you honey

647

but listen to like how we felt

648

when our show came out i think we looked at comments in the beginning

649

and we had to like teach ourselves to get out of

650

it yeah for like a little bit for i wouldn't say validation per se

651

but to get an idea like what people are thinking about you yeah no totally

652

and especially like you said she has an album out she did the she produced her own like film

653

and she has a documentary so like

654

when you're putting out new projects you obviously want to see what the feedback is

655

so i understand it

656

or someone's gonna tell you yeah like i feel like i'd be like oh hey like i'm sure

657

she has a whole team to be reading that stuff because

658

when we like were in the public eye more

659

i was like more attention was on us yeah we definitely felt

660

so good about the positive comments we were getting

661

but the negative ones even just one out of ten were the ones

662

that like impacts you the most like i thought

663

it was funny until i saw the comments where people are like you have the worst sense of humor shut

664

and i was like oh

665

so i don't have like a universally well -liked sense of humor eh

666

you're not like the let me sit here

667

and tell you a joke funny you're like a sarcastic no whatever we're like you're abusive

668

and mean and i was like oh i was like sorry that's

669

because they don't know you i'm gonna vouch for you you are funny someone told me they're like

670

and i was like okay i was like bring me down two more notches

671

i was like humble me right now listen i've been so humbled until

672

um our show came out yeah see this is why i

673

don't proclaim to be funny even though in my head i think i'm very funny

674

but everyone thinks they're funny 100

675

but i am only the funniest myself laugh 10 times a

676

day same yeah why are the veggies talking back to you

677

because no literally i was like like i'll do my makeup

678

and i'll like mess up and then i'll do like something funny like

679

if i mess up i'll like rub it

680

and be like like i'll laugh at myself is

681

that crazy a little bit i'm just laughing through the pain

682

i'm just kidding no i think um

683

it's interesting to you how like specific people bring out the funny in you like my sister laughs at everything

684

i do i'm like i am the best comedian to her i'm like i love you

685

so much you laugh at everything

686

i say doesn't land the same with some others just doesn't land with a love is blind crowd

687

you know just too much just really doesn't uh

688

but honestly that's crazy i feel like they're heading for a divorce ben

689

and j -lo i honestly hope that they don't because i think

690

that if they stay together well

691

because listen look i know we were joking we're like don't get back with your exes

692

or your back burner no really don't frozen pizza yes i agree with

693

that statement but you hope that their love story is the one

694

that like Thank you proves everyone wrong yeah people change after 20 years no

695

you could really make it work no you just gotta wait for them nope not j -lo

696

and ben affleck can't be

697

that example for you like absolutely not

698

they're they're a little scary to me like i'd be like look who said

699

you can't wait 20 years for someone to change honestly i'm team jennifer gardner

700

so honestly oh his ex -wife yeah his sex life no she's great too

701

but i mean i don't wish like divorce

702

or separation on anyone like i hope that they do work out

703

but i would i would want them to

704

because i love good love story like

705

that a little cycle just took a little long time to get there you know 20 years yeah

706

but if they're announcing

707

that they're separate at all i think they're not announcing

708

i feel like you're right you're right they did not announce

709

but from the looks of it i don't know yeah

710

i think they just have to do what's best for the mental health

711

because listen have you seen all the little clips of them together at award shows

712

and just like out in public

713

i know he's ben looks miserable no he's constantly like you could tell like he's frustrated

714

and she's frustrated yeah like you know it's bad

715

when you're public figures

716

and you can't keep your like private problems yeah out of the camera like you can't pretend for three hours

717

that you are happy yeah no literally remember

718

when he would like touch her and she'd be like that

719

that those videos give me life dude maybe that's their humor i feel like i feel like

720

if i had a partner no i only natalie i like likes this

721

because she probably be doing the same thing

722

but she truly loves it i do do it no literally no

723

but i hope they work out though i don't they look

724

so miserable but i want them to do what's best for them you know oh i'd love

725

that you know what me too see yeah if

726

if being together is what's best for them i hope they stay together

727

but if it's not i hope they amicably go their separate ways wow we are

728

so diplomatic on this podcast i love it no i feel like we have to be diplomatic these days

729

because i feel like the older i get i'm slowly becoming a karen oh what like you know

730

when we were younger and we'd see like our parents

731

or like older people like freak out about stuff like make a scene

732

and we're like oh my gosh yes i'm becoming i'm becoming those older people oh my gosh

733

so i was at target the other day

734

and i bought these burgers packaged burgers and there's a coupon from the brand

735

and it was all like you know buy one get one free

736

and i was like okay like i'm gonna grab two

737

and i check out and i was like hey like uh can i scan this coupon

738

that was on this burger um it's buy one get one free

739

and they try to scan and they're like hey it's it's not in our system like

740

so the coupon doesn't work yeah they're like so sorry it doesn't work

741

and I was like uh try again oh my gosh

742

they try again they're like it's not in our system sorry um

743

they're like do you still want the second burger do you want me to put it back

744

and I was like wait wait I was like you have a product in your store

745

that has a coupon that is not in the system oh my god

746

and I was like can you just give me like give me the burger like

747

or do i have to wait for it to be in

748

the system like how do you get the coupon in the system yeah like oh yeah

749

we have to like put it in the system at some point

750

but i don't have the ability to do that

751

so like let me know

752

if you want you know like okay mind

753

you these are cheap ass burgers like they were like 250 oh my god

754

so i'm fighting right now over two dollars

755

and 50 cents i've never been more disappointed same

756

but i couldn't let it go

757

i was just like there has to be an easy solution to this like instead of me just not buying

758

this extra burger yeah like there's got to be a solution

759

and i was all like well i was like can you just put the coupon in the system

760

and she goes well no i don't have the ability

761

and i was like can i speak to your manager oh my god oh my i mean

762

i was very kind

763

because i was like definitely she was like what the fuck just like let it go yeah

764

and she was young and

765

so i felt yeah

766

you're probably talking to like a 17 year old cashier my ego could not let it go

767

i was like i i need this extra burger for free like i i need

768

it okay this reminds me of my mom when she used to do

769

that and i would walk away i'd be like this is

770

so embarrassing i gotta go so the manager comes she's like okay what's the problem

771

and i was like hi this burger had a um a coupon on it from the brand

772

but i'm being told that the coupon isn't in the system

773

so i can't get the deal the buy one get one free

774

she goes oh yeah it's not in the system like these are new

775

it's probably like something we got this morning it was just stocked

776

and i was like can you get in the system

777

she goes oh no i don't have the ability we typically do it i forgot what the process was like

778

that i was just like frustrated and angry

779

and i was like well can i just have like the

780

free burger can you like do something oh my god

781

and then finally she was like okay sure like she's like anything to get you out of my store

782

literally and then so i got it but this whole interaction was probably like 10 15 minutes

783

And I was like, I can't believe I wasted 10, 15 minutes.

784

Yeah.

785

For two dollars

786

and fifty cents that's for a free burger yeah burger patty wait let me make

787

it it was a burger patty burger patty i'm honestly

788

i just i'm really proud of you for self -reflecting on this moment being like yeah

789

you were being i on my walk home from target

790

i was like why am i like this no really why

791

why did i almost lose my cool over two dollars

792

and fifty cents the poor people a raw burger patty why the the poor people standing behind

793

you in line being like i'm gonna have to move

794

that's a crazy thing it's like there was someone behind me

795

and she did move lanes yep

796

but she was like this isn't being resolved anytime soon the the moment

797

i was like let me talk to your manager yeah like

798

get your manager the woman behind me was like this is this is gonna be way too long

799

and i saw her move i would check reddit to see

800

if uh any one recognized you

801

and put the story on there they're like i just saw natalie from love is blind fighting for two dollars

802

and fifty cents on a burger

803

and i was like you know a piece of me was like mortified

804

but then a piece of me was like i deserve this like this is like of course like

805

if there's a coupon on a product

806

that has to be used why wouldn't

807

it be in your system yeah like you're you're it's a product in your store

808

but then i thought how crazy i was

809

and i realized the older i get like yeah like now little things like

810

that i'm like you i won't let shit go yeah you're prepping for momhood

811

because i remember back in the day going grocery shopping

812

or any shopping with my mom and she would literally be coupon on coupon

813

and it'd be so embarrassing i mean like i get it like life was expensive

814

so coupon away you're like um i'm gonna be waiting in the car no

815

i literally give me the car key i'm leaving if

816

that was my mom i'd be like mom just let it go no really

817

and now that i'm older and by myself

818

and doing my own thing i'm like wow i you know what i'm evolving into karen yeah

819

and now i really empathize with karens uh that's a bold statement not all karens

820

but some karens i'm like you asked for the mandra

821

i know why yeah you're you're not as on the Karen spectrum

822

I would place you like very on the low yeah yeah

823

like I'm still very kind about it I won't ever like yell

824

or raise my voice I don't know

825

if the manager said no I don't know what would have happened

826

I know I'd be like give me my two dollars

827

and fifty cents I'm gonna make a scene I'm gonna flip

828

this cashier by the time you even get

829

it the burgers are like thawed you're like shit I'm throwing

830

this away um no I'm on the very very low end

831

but yeah things like small things like that I do like fight for

832

when it's not worth the money

833

or time yeah yeah like why didn't I just let her put

834

it back I don't know ask yourself this question Natalie Natalie Lee

835

we're just gonna end this podcast episode right now so

836

if anyone can relate or if you think

837

that I am becoming a Karen please let us know DM

838

us at our Instagram page at out of the box

839

and make sure you guys leave a review and subscribe see you next Wednesday as a Karen bye

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FOR YOU

Recommend Video

155 sentences

Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

This speaking lesson is built on the video “60. Dating Dealbreakers, Ashley Madison, & Bennifer”. This video has 839 sentences and 9651 words to shadow. The speech runs for 48:07. The speaker talks fast, about 201 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 84% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.

Key vocabulary in this video

15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:

Word	Pronunciation	Meaning
burger noun	/ˈbɝ.ɡɚ/	A hamburger.
coupon noun	/ˈkuːˌpɑn/	A section of a ticket, showing the holder to be entitled to some specified accommodation or service, as to a passage over a designated line of travel, a…
cheat verb	/ˈt͡ʃiːt/	To violate rules in order to gain, or attempt to gain, advantage from a situation.
documentary noun	/ˌdɒk.jʊˈmɛn.tɹi/	A film, TV program, publication etc. which presents a social, political, scientific or historical subject in a factual or informative manner.
insane adjective	/ɪnˈseɪn/	Exhibiting unsoundness or disorder of mind; not sane; utterly mad.
gosh	/ɡɑːʃ/	A mild expression of surprise or enthusiasm.
photoshop verb	/ˈfoʊ.toʊ.ʃɑp/	To digitally edit or alter (a picture or photograph).
billy noun	/ˈbɪli/	A highwayman's club, billy club.
nope	/noʊp/	No.
podcast noun	/ˈpɑdˌkæst/	A program, especially an audio program, produced on a regular basis, delivered over the Internet in a compressed digital format and designed for playback on…
suck verb	/sʌk/	To use the mouth and lips to pull in (a liquid, especially milk from the breast).
whoever	/huˈɛvɚ/	Who ever: an emphatic form of who.
boom verb	/bum/	To make a loud, hollow, resonant sound.
pretend verb	/pɹəˈtɛnd/	To speak or behave so as to give a false or simulated appearance.
fifty noun	/ˈfɪfti/	A banknote or coin with a denomination of 50.

Phrasal verbs you will hear

Word	Pronunciation	Meaning
come out verb	/ˌkʌm ˈaʊt/	To be discovered; to be revealed.
come out with verb		To say (something) unexpectedly.
find out verb		To discover, as by asking or investigating.
get out of verb		To leave, exit or escape from; to become free of.
come back verb		To return to a place.
cut up verb		To cut upward.
go back to verb		To stem from; to originate in.
grow up verb		To mature and become an adult.

Sentences worth repeating

Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:

That's why you need to scheme the system, man.
I don't know exactly what it's called.
Hey, they're your friends too now.
I mean, did the thought cross my mind?
I was like, what is going on?

Grammar in this video

The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:

Structure	In the video
Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on	i've been listening · i've been making · I've been using
Conditional sentences if + clause, will/would + verb — a condition and its result	if someone didn't like pixel i would be · if i mess up i'll like
“Used to” used to + verb — a past habit or state that is no longer true	used to watch · used to do
Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now	i've adjusted · i've been · i've ever heard

Pronunciation to watch

The speaker uses 371 contractions and reduced forms, such as I'm, don't, you're. Say them the short way, as you hear them.

The “th” sounds: thin /ˈθɪn/, thick /θɪk/, thrill /θɹɪl/
The “sh” and “zh” sounds: gosh /ɡɑːʃ/, photoshop /ˈfoʊ.toʊ.ʃɑp/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, separation /ˌsɛp.əˈɹeɪ.ʃən/, shout /ʃaʊt/
Long words — get the stress right: documentary /ˌdɒk.jʊˈmɛn.tɹi/, miserable /ˈmɪz(ə)ɹəbəl/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, separation /ˌsɛp.əˈɹeɪ.ʃən/, diplomatic /ˌdɪpləˈmætɪk/

How to practise with this video

Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like burger, coupon, cheat.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

Key vocabulary in this video

Phrasal verbs you will hear

Sentences worth repeating

Grammar in this video

Pronunciation to watch

How to practise with this video

What is the Shadowing Technique?