Shadowing Practice: How To Get Into Social Flow State... FAST - Learn English Speaking with Video
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how to get into a social flow that is so strong
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so magnetic that it effortlessly pulls people into your life i have hit this
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so many different times in my life countless nights out
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and even during the daytime i've gotten into extreme social flows to the point where i'm literally walking around
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and i feel like i'm just like oozing this this like aura
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i don't even know what else to call it right maybe
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you've been there maybe you haven't hopefully you've been there without alcohol.
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What I've noticed is that with a lot of beginners, with guys that are just starting out trying to get better with their social confidence,
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if you get past that initial anxiety
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and you've ever gone out for a night out
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or you've taken massive action one day and you've really pushed past that initial layer of resistance, you start to get into a social flow, right?
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And the first couple nights out when I first started doing this over 10 years ago, I was not getting into social flow
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I was not getting into a crazy high
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I was I did not have a magnetic aura I had crippling social anxiety
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and I was very dependent on alcohol there was no way I was going to go out
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and do this stuff during the daytime and
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so for me it was uh it was it was really difficult at first all right
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so there was zero social flow
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but I want I want to talk to you guys in this video about how to actually do this sober
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and there's a couple different practical steps that I want to go over
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and then there's just a little bit of understanding about the process itself.
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Okay.
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I'm not going to talk too much about my journey in this video.
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So if you guys want to know more about my whole backstory, cause I'm 35 years old now,
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but if you want to know more about my entire transformation and how I've helped a thousand plus men transform as well,
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or even more details of my coaching program, link is in description.
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You can check out that in -depth training.
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I go over all of that and a whole lot more, but let's talk about how to actually get into that social flow.
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All right.
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At first there's going to be high levels of resistance, high levels of anxiety.
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Okay.
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The only way that you will ever get into a sober flow is to go past
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that point for an extended period of time.
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So I'll give you an example.
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You want to go out and do this daytime or nighttime to get into a social flow.
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Um, you, you can't, you can't do this without taking action consistently for a prolonged period of time.
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So what I tell clients honestly is that, hey, if you do have high levels of anxiety or you haven't been in social flow consistently,
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one of the first things you could actually start doing at home as a prerequisite to kind of get the ball rolling,
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get a little bit of social lubricant going, is you just start talking out loud.
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A lot of the times in my day -to -day right now, guys, I get into a social flow just from speaking on camera.
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Now I'm not going to, I'm not going to catch a flow five minutes into recording,
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but if I film enough content over and over and over again, if I'm talking out loud,
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even though there's nobody, there's nobody in this room right now, it's just me and a camera and this really bright light on my face.
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But if I talk here long enough out loud with enough of an expressive tone, with a, with a less,
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with, with a little bit of a filter, or as little of a filter as possible, and I say things that are pushing my emotions out,
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I will catch a social flow, right?
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So the first thing I tell guys is, hey, you want to go out, get into social flow and build that flow over time?
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It starts with just warming up.
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Starts with warming up.
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So you want to start talking out loud in an expressive way where you force yourself to laugh,
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where you talk louder than you normally would, right?
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So that's where it starts.
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Even just five to 10 minutes can be a great warmup
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If you also have an opportunity to do so,
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you could call a friend on the phone and speak to them for five to 10 minutes out loud as well.
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Now we actually get out into the world.
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This could be daytime, this could be nighttime.
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We're trying to get into a social flow.
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What I recommend doing first is just taking the first step by saying things to people in passing, right?
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If nothing else, you have very low levels, just start saying things to people in passing.
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That alone can really boost your state.
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If you've been working inside all day, looking at a fucking laptop and you're feeling drained you're feeling sleepy
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and then you do five to ten minutes talking out loud
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and then you go outside
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and you just start talking to people in passing like literally greetings
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and compliments that alone can start to wake you up a little bit
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however
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if you really want to get into a social flow like
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what i was talking about the beginning of this video i'm talking about like you you're on a high
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and anybody you talk to is like really drawn into you and you're just in a completely different emotional state,
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it's going to take more action than that, right?
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But what's going to happen is you start to go past the zone that you've ever, that you're normally comfortable at, right?
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So for most men, I think the easiest way is to go up and start approaching women.
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If you actually go up and do a direct approach on a girl, like you actually stop a girl and let her know
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that you just saw her and you thought she looked cute and you wanted to just see how her day's going,
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you wanted to meet her really quick, right?
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That is extremely uncomfortable for most men.
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Now, if you can't do that and you, now, if you haven't been doing that and you start trying to do that, get ready.
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Because after like one, two, or three, you might feel a little bit uncomfortable right
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or you go talk to a couple people it might feel uncomfortable
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if you have high levels of social anxiety but
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if you keep going
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and you go to from three to five approaches to 10 approaches to 15
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or even 20 approaches at some point
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you get over like like your nervous system actually calms down at some point the first three
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or five you're really freaking out because you're not used to doing this.
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And it's like, what is going on?
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Is this rejection?
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Like I want to go home.
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If you stay past that point though,
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eventually the nervous system really calms down and you start to get desensitized to whether or not you're going to get rejected.
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And now you're going to be in this really, really optimal state, really optimal state, which is, it's literally like a drug.
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It's a, it's literally a drug.
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That's, that's what it is like
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if i were to look back at earlier in my journey
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i was literally chasing this high i would go out at nighttime
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and really look forward to getting into these crazy high states
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and by the way i'm not saying you need to go like
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that guys what i'm trying to show you in this video is
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that if you just are somewhat social on a daily basis
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and you just push your your social comfort zone a little bit, you'll, you'll raise your baseline social flow.
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Like right now I can wake up and I'm pretty social.
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I haven't done any social warmup.
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I haven't approached anybody.
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I could turn the camera on without even warming up and just go into it.
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Right.
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And so your baseline levels of social flow will go up and up and up with consistency.
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So there's two parts to this as I'm kind of riffing here.
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One part of it is if you do this on a daily basis, a minimum amount of action on a daily basis,
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you're going to build momentum.
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You're going to build consistency and your baseline is going to start to go higher and higher and higher.
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And your ability to just talk to people
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and have a really powerful vibe and aura to you that will start getting stronger and stronger and stronger.
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So the daily consistency is a big part to this.
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But the other part of it is in one day out in any one session,
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you really need to push it way further than whatever your comfort zone is.
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Because I was the guy at one point where I would just go out
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and try to do my three interactions or my two interactions a day, or just say something to three people, which is great.
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That's a, that's a great first step.
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And you can totally make progress that way,
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but you're not going to get into an extreme social flow to the point where your confidence is like
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elevated higher than it's ever been on a day -to -day, right?
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The only way you do that is a prolonged amount of action.
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You take, like if you're used to doing like three interactions on the night out, or you approached three girls, or you did something like that,
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like try doing 20 one day, try doing like legitimate, like 20 approaches.
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And at some point in that process, it might be at eight, 12, 15, 20.
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I don't know.
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I have clients that have done like 30 or even 40 or 50, not that you need to go that high.
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But what I'm saying is once you get past a certain point, just it's, it's just like anything else, right?
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If I, if I turn the camera on and I talk after five minutes, I'm not going to be in a crazy social flow.
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But if I've been recording for an hour, I'm going to be in a crazy social flow.
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Or if I'm running on the treadmill, the first three minutes, I'm barely even warmed up.
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And then at some point I really get into the flow of things it takes time to get into that flow, right?
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So you need uninterrupted, prolonged amount of action.
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But the reason that the social flow is so crazy is that once you hit that level,
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it's like something flips in your brain and you can now just pretty much go up and talk to anybody.
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Like your fear of rejection for the day, unfortunately, it's only for the day.
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It's not like you unlock it and then you're just like God mode the rest of your life.
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But for the next like hour or two, your emotional state is at a completely different frequency
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and you can actually go out and you have like zero fear of rejection
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and you could probably push it a lot further than you ever have before right
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so i wanted to talk about this
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because i don't i think there's a lot of men out there
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that never hit you never catch your your social flow you never really hit
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that level you just kind of you maybe you watch content like this
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and you do a couple approaches here and there
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or maybe you only do drunk approaches or maybe you only watch content
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and you don't even really do the thing whichever level you're at
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It's good if you're doing at least a couple of days, but if you never really,
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really push it, dude, you just don't unlock that next level.
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And there is a next level, man.
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And once you get there, I'm telling you, there are several people that I met on either nights out
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or days out where I was in just an insane flow
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and we just had a really amazing conversation because my vibe was just so powerful, right?
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Men and women, this is not just for picking up girls.
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This is for networking.
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This is for social confidence this is for being able to interact with anybody it's literally a superpower
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and once you start building this thing up
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you're going to realize like damn this actually leads to freedom this leads to unlimited opportunity in my life
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because essentially every person you talk to you could either make a friend
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or a business partner or a potential lover right
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when it's done properly so if you're not pushing it
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and you're not getting into social flow start prioritizing this i encourage
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you guys start pushing yourself one two three times a week get out there
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and start practicing this could be in your day -to -day
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this could be you taking a dedicated time out of your day to go practice your social skills
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it could be on the weekends on nights out all right it doesn't matter
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which one but whatever fits your lifestyle it's important
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that you start pushing it because there's so much benefit
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that can come from your life
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if you get this side of your life also handled all right
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if you want help increasing your social confidence getting into more interactions building up
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that social flow and really just getting your dating life handled.
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If you want to achieve your dream dating life, guys, click the link down below.
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Check out the in -depth training.
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I go over my whole backstory, the clients, my coaching program, and how it can help you really achieve your dream dating life, all right?
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Links down below.
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That's all for this video.
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Do yourselves a favor.
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Make a commitment this week to get out the house
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and start pushing yourself to being more social and hit that social flow, man.
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It feels awesome.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “How To Get Into Social Flow State... FAST”. This video has 182 sentences and 2369 words to shadow. The speech runs for 11:40. The speaker talks fast, about 203 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 88% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| anxiety noun | /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/ | An unpleasant state of mental uneasiness, nervousness, apprehension and obsession or concern about some uncertain event. |
| interaction noun | /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/ | The situation or occurrence in which two or more things act upon one another to produce an effect; the effect resulting from such a situation or occurrence. |
| daytime noun | /ˈdeɪtaɪm/ | The time of daylight; the time between sunrise and sunset. |
| uncomfortable adjective | /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/ | Not comfortable; causing discomfort. |
| consistency noun | /kənˈsɪs.tən.si/ | Local coherence. |
| rejection noun | /ɹɪˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/ | The act of rejecting. |
| baseline noun | /ˈbeɪslaɪn/ | A line that is a base for measurement or for construction. |
| aura noun | /ˈɔːɹə/ | A subtle emanation or exhalation of any substance, such as an aroma or odour. |
| comfort noun | /ˈkʌm.fət/ | Contentment, ease. |
| filter noun | /ˈfɪltɚ/ | A device which separates a suspended, dissolved, or particulate matter from a fluid, solution, or other substance; any device that separates one substance from… |
| consistently adverb | /kənˈsɪstəntli/ | In a consistent manner. |
| magnetic adjective | /mæɡˈnɛtɪk/ | Of, relating to, operating by, or caused by magnetism. |
| optimal adjective | /ˈɑptɪməl/ | The best, most favourable or desirable, especially under some restriction. |
| sober adjective | /ˈsoʊ.bɚ/ | Not drunk; not intoxicated. |
| vibe noun | /vaɪb/ | An atmosphere or aura felt to belong to a person, place or thing. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| go out verb | To leave, especially a building. | |
| go up verb | To move upwards. | |
| talk out verb | To resolve (a problem) by talking about it. | |
| warm up verb | /ˌwɔː(ɹ)m ˈʌp/ | To become warmer. |
| go over verb | To look at carefully; to scrutinize; to analyze. | |
| check out verb | To record the departure or withdrawal of someone or something (such as guests, employees, books, etc.). | |
| get out verb | To leave or escape. | |
| get past verb | To continue around a blockage; to get around (something); to surpass something that is in the way. |
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | you've been working · haven't been doing · I've been recording |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | have hit · i've gotten · you've been |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | guys that are · state, which is · people, which is |
| Verb + -ing enjoy, keep, stop… + -ing — verbs that are followed by the -ing form | started doing · start doing · start talking |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 66 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, I'm, you've. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, rejection /ɹɪˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/, essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, transformation /ˌtɹæns.fɔɹˈmeɪ.ʃən/, emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: anxiety /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/, consistency /kənˈsɪs.tən.si/, consistently /kənˈsɪstəntli/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like anxiety, interaction, daytime.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.