Shadowing Practice: What Do You Truly Need? Finding Clarity in a Confusing World - Learn English Speaking with Video

Oh God, it's too awful for words.

I mean, just, just, oh.

The language that I would use with myself.

So now I'm going to cry.

I mean I can't say the words on camera.

But just very unkind, very unkind and harsh and...

Yeah, I mean you just wouldn't speak to anybody that you know like that.

Yeah.

I often say if I spoke to my friends like I speak to myself, they wouldn't be friends with me.

Like, you stupid idiot, you stupid dumb idiot.

And a lot of this in between.

So very harsh, very harsh words.

As you get older, there can be this beautiful softening of life.

Physically you actually feel you put on a little bit of weight and you get a bit softer.

But everything softens.

Your mind softens, your words soften.

You speak in a different way, you move in a different way, and it all slows down.

Life just becomes this magical thing where you can see so much more.

You can actually see things, you can see the wood for the trees.

When I was about 15 I did this modeling course

and I mean I was very skinny at the time and I remember going for this casting once and they said,

oh no, your hips are too big.

And it felt like this sort of devastating moment at the time.

I mean, it's such a silly thing to say, but that was my body image as well.

Growing up in the 70s and the 80s, the body image was just totally different to what it is now.

If you weren't skinny and fitted the mould, I suppose in some way you weren't accepted.

Well, that was the narrative that ran in my head, is that if you weren't skinny, you weren't accepted.

So there was this sort of disconnection with my body a lot.

I need to lose weight, I need to change my body, I need to exercise.

This whole narrative going on.

So a lot of shame.

A lot of shame, body shame, all of that kind of stuff.

And in that, having low self-esteem and then making stupid choices.

And I use stupid now because they weren't the greatest choices then, but then I would completely lambaste myself for the choices that I had made.

The lovely thing with getting older is that you become a bit wiser and you begin to realise that that's actually bullshit,

it's actually rubbish and it's not true.

But it feels like it takes a long time to work that out of your system.

Now being in my 50s it feels like I can let those things go, I can cut those cords.

I can cut those cords and let that narrative go.

Which is a very liberating feeling and experience actually.

That those things are not actually true.

But we can carry them for a very long time and sometimes for a whole lifetime.

Trust has been a great gift to me and it's been a long process of trusting and also to trusting myself.

I felt very closed and shut off and silent and secretive.

So I suppose that's what a lot of this stuff was about.

It was like I was incredibly secretive about things.

I mean, a lot of my friends have told me that I'm secretive, but I feel way less secretive now.

I feel like I've gathered my lost parts.

For a very long time, I just felt lost.

I felt like I was just moving through this three-dimensional realm and drifting through life,

whereas I felt like I needed something,

something to kind of hold me in this next phase of my journey.

And I found, I found art again.

There's no expectation of the outcome.

That gift of no expectation of the outcome is such a powerful thing

because it means that you can let go and be free and letting it just unfold.

And then it usually unfolds in the most beautiful, perfect way.

I used to have this little set of cards that had a lot of words on it, and I lost the set of cards

and then about a year later the only card I found was patience and that has been a great gift.

And it goes back to that thing of for me patience and trust is kind of, they kind of like interlinked.

Allowing things to unfold instead of forcing things or pushing things in a direction that might not necessarily be the right direction.

They say patience is a virtue.

I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

But it's, yeah, patience is a very good reminder of just give it time and let it unfold.

One ends up spending so much energy

and time on trying to make something perfect and generally it is perfect in all its imperfections.

It feels like becoming kinder to myself has been quite a long process.

On a very rare odd occasion I catch myself calling myself something that's not very nice.

Then I actually re-change and say, no, no, no, no, come on, come on, come on.

That's not very nice.

That's not a very kind thing to say to yourself.

So it's a practice.

It's a practice.

It's a language that you need to learn in order to become kinder to yourself.

It feels like now, and I can really say this, like, from a heart space, that I feel like I'm back in my body and I love being in my body.

And, yeah, it's just, it's a good space to be in.

I know for myself, if I wake up and I've got a bit of anxiety, I always ask myself, what do you need in that moment?

And I think one can apply that to somebody else as well.

So if you're moving through the world and you can see somebody's agitated or having a, It's like, what do you need?

And sometimes they can answer you, sometimes they can't.

But often they can.

And it might be something very simple.

And, you know, a kind word, a kind gesture, a kind something kind.

Whatever that may be, however that shows up in that moment.

I'm often in awe of where I live.

and I appreciate every moment of it.

It feels like my life has become very magical, that's what it feels like.

You know, I can wander down at sunset, it's my favourite time of the day, and, you know, go and talk to my plants.

I love talking to my plants.

Maybe that's an age thing as well.

I love my life now.

I really do.

I love the way it's taking me.

I feel 100% enough.

In all aspects of my life.

I've really got to a good place within myself and in that this kind of shines completely.

Thank you so much for watching this story all the way to the end

and a special thank you to all of you on Patreon who help us to make these films.

If you want to join us on the journey please click the link over here, I think.

100

It just wouldn't be possible without you.

101

Thank you.

102

Thank you.

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

This video has 102 sentences and 1217 words to shadow. The speech runs for 13:12. The speaker talks slowly, about 92 words per minute, so there is time to copy every sound. 83% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.

Key vocabulary in this video

15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:

Word	Pronunciation	Meaning
patience noun	/ˈpeɪ̯.ʃəns/	The quality of being patient.
narrative noun	/ˈnæɹ.ə.tɪv/	The systematic recitation of an event or series of events.
harsh adjective	/ˈhɑɹʃ/	Unpleasantly rough to the touch or other senses.
skinny adjective	/ˈskɪni/	Thin, generally in a negative sense (as opposed to slim, which is thin in a positive sense).
outcome noun	/ˈaʊtkʌm/	That which is produced or occurs as a result of an event or process.
magical adjective	/ˈmæd͡ʒ.ɪ.kəl/	Of, relating to, or by means of magic.
expectation noun	/ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/	The act or state of expecting or looking forward to an event as about to happen.
cord noun	/ˈkoɹd/	A long, thin, flexible length of twisted yarns (strands) of fibre (a rope, for example).
necessarily adverb	/ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/	Inevitably; of necessity.
awful adjective	/ˈɔːfʊl/	Very bad.
hip noun	/hɪp/	The outward-projecting parts of the pelvis and top of the femur and the overlying tissue.
anxiety noun	/æŋˈzaɪ.əti/	An unpleasant state of mental uneasiness, nervousness, apprehension and obsession or concern about some uncertain event.
silent adjective	/ˈsaɪ̯lənt/	Free from sound or noise; absolutely still; perfectly quiet.
aspect noun	/ˈæspɛkt/	Any specific feature, part, or element of something.
whereas	/(h)wɛɹˈæz/	In contrast; whilst on the contrary; although.

Phrasal verbs you will hear

Word	Pronunciation	Meaning
end up verb		To bring to a conclusion.
go back to verb		To stem from; to originate in.
shut off verb		To stop or turn off by closing something, such as a valve.
slow down verb		To decelerate.
wake up verb	/ˌweɪk ˈʌp/	To stop sleeping; to awake.

Grammar in this video

The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:

Structure	In the video
Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now	has been · have told · I've gathered
Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it	weren't accepted

Pronunciation to watch

The speaker uses 19 contractions and reduced forms, such as weren't, I'm, I've. Say them the short way, as you hear them.

The “sh” and “zh” sounds: patience /ˈpeɪ̯.ʃəns/, harsh /ˈhɑɹʃ/, expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, occasion /əˈkeɪ̯ʒən/, shine /ʃaɪn/
Long words — get the stress right: expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, anxiety /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/, incredibly /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/, dimensional /daɪˈmɛn.ʃə.nəl/

How to practise with this video

Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
Shadow it sentence by sentence at normal speed, repeating each one until your rhythm matches the speaker.
Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like patience, narrative, harsh.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

Key vocabulary in this video

Phrasal verbs you will hear

Grammar in this video

Pronunciation to watch

How to practise with this video

What is the Shadowing Technique?