Практика Shadowing: this knowledge will solve too many problems, that’s why it’s never taught to us - Изучайте разговорный английский по видео

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Hi everyone, I'm back with another video.

Today I want to talk about something very important.

A skill that can save lives, literally.

A skill that can create harmonious relationships, boost people's self -confidence, and solve so many problems like overconsumption and addiction.

But somehow it has never been taught to us.

Like ever.

Not at school, not at home as well.

People rarely talk about this publicly,

so many of us don't even know what it is and all the amazing benefits that I can offer to each individual.

I've been thinking about making this video for so long.

I've been marinating on it, contemplating it, procrastinating on making it as well because it felt like such a big topic to cover.

But today, I'm not going to keep my mouth shut anymore.

I'm going to talk about it.

So yeah, let's get into it.

First of all, I come from Vietnam

and I want to talk about a characteristic

that a lot of Vietnamese parents have it sounds a bit irrelevant

but it's actually connected to what I want to say later

so please stick with me Vietnamese parents right very loving very caring very protective of their children yeah

and very strict as well

so they're really good at disciplining their children however there is something

that I've observed throughout my entire life

and this does not apply to every single vietnamese parent

but the majority of them for sure many parents in my

country especially mothers see their children as a center of their lives

if they have good husbands who love them and cherish them you know

if they have a good relationship with their partners things are much better

but i have to say

that it's a rare thing here a lot of women don't feel happy

or fulfilled or appreciated in their marriage so basically they have a lot of internal struggle like disappointment,

loneliness, and even build up resentment and anger because they no longer feel emotionally supported by their partners anymore.

And when they have a child, right, it seems like they found another source of hope.

So these women's lives gradually revolve around their children only.

Since they feel emotionally neglected and unsupported by their partners, they cannot make themselves feel happy either.

And on top of that, maybe they feel, you know, frustrated

or exhausted in their jobs they don't have any personal interest to spend time on eventually

they end up being emotionally dependent on their children the love

and care that they should have given themselves in the first place

or at least the love and care

that their partners should have been able to give them in the first place now becomes their children's responsibility

so you know these parents start to have a lot of expectations for their children

they want their children to do well at school to make them feel proud

they want their children to listen to them all the time

and obey them without having any opinions and

if you have any opinions even when it's reasonable

and you communicate it in a calm way you will still be accused of being disrespectful

and your opinion will be brushed off anyway

so you'd better keep your mouth shut

when these children grow up

they will still be under lots of pressure to do certain

things to make their parents happy like working in certain job earning a certain amount of money getting married

and have children at a certain age and

if they don't do these things they will be called selfish

and unfilial by their own parents and even

if they get married have babies

and successful careers they are still unable to make their parents happy it's like an impossible mission

because these parents are like i said emotionally dependent on their children

so if their children don't call them every day they get sad

If their children move to a different country to build a family or to work and study, they become depressed.

If their children talk back to them just to express their honest thoughts and sincere desires, they get offended.

So basically, their happiness, their self -worth, their life purpose and life meaning are entirely tied to their children.

In the process of raising their children, these parents have lost a sense of self.

So their identity now is just XYZ's parents, and they cannot feel happy on their own.

They're always in the state of waiting for and expecting something external to happen to make them feel good.

And these things have to be provided by and done for them by their children.

Most of the time, these parents, they have little or no ability to connect with

and control their emotions as well when your emotions are dependent on external factors.

They will go up and down like this all the time because the external world is never the same.

Things don't always happen the way you want them to happen.

People don't always act the way you want them to act.

The outside world is always fluctuating so if your emotions are conditioned by what's outside of you,

you will ride an emotional roller coaster every day

and it's going to be 100 times harder for you to control your emotions

when they are always going up and down like this.

And this goes for both genders.

Parents who are emotionally dependent on their children can have anger issues.

They can be chronically anxious, emotionally

and mentally unstable just imagine being raised by someone like this children being raised by these parents can grow up

and become high achievers highly responsible and capable on the outside but inside they're all struggling with anxiety,

self -doubt and perfectionism they become people pleasers they cannot connect with their feelings

they have a strong inner critic they do not know what they want to do with their lives

and they feel guilty prioritizing themselves

If they are lucky, they can heal from these emotional wounds early on, but if they are unlucky,

they will have to carry this weight for the rest of their lives and never truly heal.

And in the worst cases, if they inherit their parents' inability to control their emotions, because you know children, they mimic their parents.

These children will grow up and pose dangers to society.

People who cannot control and process their emotions become dangerous for other people around them and for society.

Just think about it, so many violent crimes were committed by people who couldn't control or regulate their emotions.

Imagine how better this world would be if from a young age we were taught how to understand and process our emotions.

How to have self -sustained peace and contentment.

How to feel happy on our own.

How to feel happy being alone without always seeking something external to fill internal needs

there are people who cannot be alone they cannot spend any time with themselves

they don't know anything about themselves either they don't know how to feel fulfilled

and at peace being alone

so they always need someone by their side

they always need to be in a relationship they always need to receive others attention

and love they always need to go out meet friends socialize

and talk all the time because they cannot face themselves

100

and they hate being with themselves you can feel happy on your own

101

and you should feel happy on your own before you step into any relationship before you get married

102

and have children or else you will suffer

103

and you will make everybody around you suffer i cannot stress this enough people who are emotionally dependent on others,

104

they are miserable and they will make everybody around them miserable.

105

Just like the parents I talked about, they become obsessive and controlling in relationships.

106

They always feel insecure because there's no inner support.

107

They crave external validation and attention because they feel empty inside.

108

So they need to overachieve, overwork, overconsume, overeat.

109

They also sabotage their own physical and mental health to seek validation from others

110

and then go trip everybody around them about their sacrifices

111

so others will do what they want these issues could certainly have been prevented

112

if we have been taught about emotional independence and that's the skill

113

that i want to talk about emotional independence the ability to feel happy on your own

114

In order for us to experience independent happiness, from a very young age,

115

we should have been taught how to have a high level of self -awareness and self -understanding, how to connect with ourselves physically, mentally and emotionally.

116

We should have been encouraged to spend more time being alone, have some hobbies and interests,

117

explore new areas of knowledge that make our eyes sparkle with curiosity and excitement.

118

We should have been taught how to listen to our inner voice, listen to what our body needs, listen to what our mind needs.

119

But we've never been taught about these things.

120

We've never been taught how to connect with ourselves, how to feel good on our own.

121

Since childhood, we have been taught that if you want to feel good, you have to please your parents,

122

your teachers, and then you will get some compliments from them.

123

Only then can you feel good about yourself.

124

Nobody taught us how to appreciate ourselves as who we were with flaws

125

and imperfections nobody said to us

126

that hey before you come to someone else to share this big

127

or small win you should clap for yourself first

128

you should say good job to yourself first no no no always seek external validation first only

129

when people validate you can you feel good about yourself that's the belief

130

that has been deeply embedded in our minds since childhood also we were not given

131

that many opportunities to discover

132

and develop personal interests there was only a limited selection of subjects that you could choose from

133

many of which were taught in a really theoretical and boring way

134

if you have a specific interest or passion

135

that is different from these socially valued subjects you and

136

that interest won't be taken seriously especially

137

if it's something creative like in my country in many high schools arts

138

and music are completely removed from the curriculum because the adults they think

139

that these subjects are impractical or unrealistic

140

and even at lower levels of education these subjects are never taken seriously parents

141

and teachers think that there's no time for hobbies and

142

interests so they don't encourage the children to develop these interests slowly these interests are forgotten

143

and replaced by endless formal classes frequent tasks

144

and examinations by the time these students become adults they become completely disconnected from their passions

145

and they don't know what to do in their free time

146

so they scroll all day scrolling becomes their happy

147

and we've never been encouraged to spend time being alone okay

148

let's talk about this let's talk about this there's this stigma

149

surrounding people who like spending time being alone people often assume

150

that they are mentally unwell or closed off from the world only people who love socializing

151

and interacting with others all the time extroverted people social butterflies are considered happy and healthy.

152

Well, social interaction is indeed one of the most important factors that contribute to life satisfaction and well -being.

153

But quality alone time is no less important because it's

154

when you can truly connect with yourself without all the external noise and other people's opinions.

155

People who spend too much time being alone may struggle emotionally

156

and mentally are not

157

but people who cannot spend any time being alone people who

158

like they just cannot sit with themselves in silence for more than five minutes these people are more ill

159

they just don't know how ill they are

160

because they have been running away from their problems for too

161

long these problems these past wounds these past traumas have entered their subconscious mind

162

and quietly governed their lives but in their conscious mind they still think

163

that they have nothing to heal from to think about it

164

we've never been taught how to have a good relationship with ourselves

165

you know nobody taught us how to talk with ourselves gently

166

and kindly nobody taught us to be friends with ourselves nobody taught us

167

that we are actually in control of our emotions

168

and that we can choose to feel happy independently without any external conditions but you know what

169

But there's a reason for everything, and the reason for this is because if you can feel happy on your own,

170

how can people and society benefit from it?

171

No, seriously, think about it, if we can all feel happy on our own, there will be no profit for companies and for the governments.

172

The biggest source of profit in this world comes from our unhappiness and insecurity.

173

If you are happy and you think you're enough, you don't feel a need to buy things and services to impress others,

174

to show off your status, to fill emotional voids and to escape boredom.

175

Then all the marketing schemes will be useless.

176

The biggest goal of these companies and these marketers is to make us believe

177

that our lives are incomplete with our certain products and services.

178

So if we can feel whole and complete on our own, nobody can make money from that.

179

Also, if we can feel happy on our own, then our worth is not entirely tied to labor, output, financial success and external validation anymore.

180

We will protect our peace.

181

We will protect ourselves better.

182

We will refuse to work in places that over -exploit our resources.

183

We will walk away from toxic situations and relationships.

184

Nobody can manipulate and control us anymore because we are not living and acting from a place of lack and fear.

185

So basically, if we were taught about emotional independence, we would be free.

186

And people don't want us to be free.

187

So they keep us stuck in the loop of emotional dependency.

188

That's how this society functions.

189

I know it sounds really messed up, but if you can understand all of this, you can find a way out of this loop.

190

It's quite simple, actually.

191

The hardest part is understanding all of this, understanding how important it is for you to be emotionally independent,

192

and that you're not doing this for yourself not just for yourself

193

but for people you love as well

194

but you can feel happy on your own

195

but in order for you to do

196

that you need to trace back to the reasons why most people cannot feel happy on their own

197

which I mentioned before is because they lack self knowledge

198

and in order for you to understand yourself really well you need to treat yourself like a new friend

199

that you really want to get close to just imagine you meet this new friend right

200

and you really want to get to know more about her

201

what do you do you don't just ask some basic questions

202

like what's your name where you from what's your job

203

you actually want to know more about what she likes to do in her free time

204

what she expects in relationships and friendships her standards

205

and boundaries her deepest desires her biggest dreams her past experiences

206

and how they shape her present character what lights her soul

207

up what excites her what worries her what scares her

208

and most importantly you want to spend time with her just like that

209

if you want to know more about yourself you need to ask yourself about all the aspects i just mentioned

210

and don't give quick answers think about them deeply

211

and write them down so that you can you know read them later

212

and spend some time being alone in silence only

213

when you're alone can you face your truths only

214

when you're alone do the inner parts

215

that you've hidden for years start to resurface only

216

when you're alone can you listen to your inner voice because it is no longer dominated by other people's opinions

217

only when you're alone can you see the shadows inside your mind the parts

218

that you have run away from

219

or suppressed for too long i will probably talk about facing your shadows in another video

220

because it's too complex to just explain in a few sentences.

221

But yeah, you need to know that all of your external problems stem from internal conflict and chaos.

222

And in order for you to resolve these external issues, you need to look within and connect with yourself.

223

And this is not just my idea.

224

It has been talked about by so many great minds throughout history.

225

Socrates said, know thyself.

226

Lao Tzu said, he who knows others is wise he who knows himself is enlightened.

227

Confucius said, to know what you know and what you do not know, that is true knowledge.

228

Aristotle said, knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.

229

Plato said, knowing yourself is the greatest wisdom.

230

Carl Jung said, who looks outside, dreams.

231

Who looks inside, awakes.

232

He also said, until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life.

233

And you will call it fate.

234

At first, when you embark on the journey of self -inquiry it can be a bit overwhelming

235

but just keep walking on it one question at a time one moment of self -awareness at a time

236

and gradually you'll know and accept every single part of yourself good

237

or bad positive or negative light

238

or darkness you can spend time doing what you love even

239

when it doesn't come with monetary rewards you see your emotions as signals that can help you navigate through life,

240

make positive changes and heal your past wounds.

241

You appreciate yourself more, you consume less, your attention is more focused,

242

you start to be more responsible for your own happiness instead of expecting others to make you feel happy.

243

You understand a fact that emotional independence comes from the ability to perceive

244

and treat yourself the way you would have wanted to be perceived

245

and treated then you will experience more peace self -generated peace stable

246

and everlasting peace that's when you untether yourself

247

and you become free I want to make this video to tell you

248

that it's never too late to learn about this even though we were not taught about emotional independence

249

and we will probably never be taught about it we can teach ourselves

250

and then we can teach our future generations always remember

251

that this knowledge is not just for you it's for everybody around you the world will be a better place

252

if each of us is more self -aware and self -accountable

253

so let's make changes from today i didn't think i would be able to summarize all of my observations

254

and experience into one video

255

But I did it and I really hope that this video brings value to you.

256

Thank you so much for watching.

257

I'll see you again soon.

258

Bye bye!

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Лексика и советы по произношению к этому уроку

Этот урок разговорной практики построен на видео «this knowledge will solve too many problems, that’s why it’s never taught to us». Чаще всего повторяются слова: parent, taught, alone, self. В этом видео 258 предложений и 3203 слов для шедоуинга. Речь длится 19:14. Говорящий говорит в естественном темпе, около 167 слов в минуту, близком к повседневной речи. 88% слов входят в 3000 самых частых слов английского языка, поэтому лексика простая.

Ключевая лексика этого видео

15 слов из видео, которые стоит выучить, с произношением и значением:

Слово	Произношение	Значение
emotion существительное	/ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/	эмо́ция, чу́вство
emotionally наречие	/ɪˈməʊʃənəli/	эмоциона́льно
connect глагол	/kəˈnɛkt/	свя́зывать, связа́ть
dependent прилагательное	/dɪˈpɛndənt/	зави́симый, подчинённый
mentally наречие	/ˈmɛntəli/	у́мственно, мы́сленно
heal глагол	/ˈhiːl/	лечи́ть, вы́лечить
validation существительное	/ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/	ратифика́ция, утвержде́ние
encourage глагол	/ɪnˈkʌɹ.ɪd͡ʒ/	ободря́ть, обо́дрить
happiness существительное	/ˈhæpinɪs/	сча́стье, ра́дость
skill существительное	/skɪl/	уме́ние, на́вык
wound существительное	/ˈwund/	ра́на, ране́ние
silence существительное	/ˈsaɪ̯ləns/	тишина́, молча́ние
suffer глагол	/ˈsʌfɚ/	страда́ть, му́чаться
awareness существительное	/əˈwɛɹ.nəs/	созна́ние, осозна́ние
deeply наречие	/ˈdi(ː)pli/	глубоко́

Фразовые глаголы, которые вы услышите

Слово	Значение
grow up глагол	расти́, выраста́ть
go up глагол	поднима́ться, подня́ться
brush off глагол	отмести́, отмета́ть
build up глагол	накапливаться, скапливаться
end up глагол	зака́нчиваться, зако́нчиться
go out глагол	выходи́ть, вы́йти
show off глагол	рисова́ться, красова́ться

Фразы, которые стоит повторять

Короткие законченные фразы из видео, которые пригодятся в повседневном разговоре:

Hi everyone, I'm back with another video.
I'm going to talk about it.
I'll see you again soon.

Грамматика в этом видео

Конструкции, которые говорящий использует чаще всего, с точными словами из видео:

Конструкция	В видео
Present Perfect Continuous have/has been + -ing — действие началось раньше и продолжается	I've been thinking · I've been marinating · have been running
Present Perfect have/has + причастие прошедшего времени — прошлое действие, важное сейчас	has never been taught · I've observed · have lost
Пассивный залог be + причастие прошедшего времени — важно, что происходит, а не кто это делает	been taught · be accused · will be brushed
Придаточные определительные who / which + предложение — уточнение о человеке или предмете	People who cannot · people who couldn · people who are

Произношение, на которое стоит обратить внимание

Говорящий использует 43 сокращённых и редуцированных форм, например don't, you're, we've. Произносите их коротко, так, как слышите.

Звуки «sh» и «zh»: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, emotionally /ɪˈməʊʃənəli/, validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, passion /ˈpæʃən/, shadow /ˈʃædəʊ̯/
Длинные слова — следите за ударением: emotionally /ɪˈməʊʃənəli/, validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, miserable /ˈmɪz(ə)ɹəbəl/, anxiety /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/

Звуки, трудные для русскоязычных:

/w/ — губы округлены, это не /v/: wound /ˈwund/, awareness /əˈwɛɹ.nəs/, wisdom /ˈwɪzdəm/, reward /ɹɪˈwɔɹd/, frequent /ˈfɹiː.kwənt/
/h/ — лёгкий выдох, а не русское «х»: heal /ˈhiːl/, happiness /ˈhæpinɪs/, hobby /ˈhɑ.bi/, inherit /ɪnˈhɛɹɪt/, harmonious /hɑɹˈmoʊni.əs/
Звонкие согласные в конце слова — не оглушайте их: encourage /ɪnˈkʌɹ.ɪd͡ʒ/, wound /ˈwund/, perceive /pɚˈsiv/, solve /sɒlv/, refuse /ɹɪˈfjuːz/

Как заниматься с этим видео

Прослушайте всё видео один раз молча и выпишите незнакомые слова.
Начните со скорости 0,75×, повторяйте предложение за предложением и вернитесь к обычной скорости, когда станет легко.
Запишите себя и сравните с оригиналом, обращая внимание на такие слова, как emotion, emotionally, connect.

Что такое техника Shadowing?

Shadowing — это научно обоснованная техника изучения языка, изначально разработанная для подготовки профессиональных переводчиков и популяризированная полиглотом доктором Александром Аргуэльесом. Метод прост, но эффективен: вы слушаете аудио на английском от носителей языка и немедленно повторяете вслух — как тень, следующая за говорящим с задержкой в 1–2 секунды. В отличие от пассивного прослушивания или грамматических упражнений, Shadowing заставляет мозг и мышцы рта одновременно обрабатывать и воспроизводить реальные речевые паттерны. Исследования показывают, что это значительно улучшает точность произношения, интонацию, ритм, связную речь, понимание на слух и беглость речи — что делает его одним из самых эффективных методов для подготовки к IELTS Speaking и реального общения на английском.

Техника шедоуинга: читать полное пошаговое руководство →

Практика Shadowing: this knowledge will solve too many problems, that’s why it’s never taught to us - Изучайте разговорный английский по видео

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Лексика и советы по произношению к этому уроку

Ключевая лексика этого видео

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