Shadowing Practice: How to Find Someone You Can Be With Forever - Learn English Speaking with Video

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When you select a partner, whether you realize it or not, you're choosing a whole lifestyle and not just the person.
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You're choosing their sleep schedule.
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You're choosing their money habits.
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You're choosing their stress levels, their family drama, their levels of cleanliness, their work ethic, their coping mechanisms.
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All of these things will be a baseline of your daily life.
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If their normal is doom scrolling till 2am, avoiding all conflict, impulse spending and never exercising, Guess what?
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You're signing up to live in that ecosystem.
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Love does not cancel out people's flaws.
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In fact, love just makes you tolerate them for longer.
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Most people obsess over Do we have romantic chemistry?
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and they completely skip Can I live with this person's version of a Tuesday for the next 10 years?
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The hard truth is you don't fix somebody's lifestyle from the inside.
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You either accept the package as they are, Or your walk.
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I've been having, I've been having this conversation with a lot of single friends recently. of.
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I'm not sure.
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What I'm noticing...
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is that people tend seem to have kind of this laundry list of requirements and
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as soon as they and there's this also this false perception of infinite options.
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And so as soon as the person that they're seeing or that they're on a date with
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like fails one of the qualifications.
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They're like, Oh, next I'm going to move on.
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And then of course they're, you know, 45 and still single and wondering why they never found anybody.
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And have you ever heard that story that I think it, I think it was Warren Buffett where he said that he was like,
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you know, you, you, Write out a list of 20 things that you want in your life.
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put them in order from the thing that's most important, least important, and then cross out everything, but the top three, I've essentially started giving that exercise to my single friends.
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Cause I'm like, you're not going to find all of these.
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And, and, and it's, you've been brainwashed.
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You have this like false perception that there's a lot of these people out there
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that that tick every single box and there's not.
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And you're probably even if there is, you're probably not going to meet them.
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And if you do meet them, they're going to have so many options that it's going to be like very unlikely that you end up with them.
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It's find your three non -negotiables and then...
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negotiate on the rest and that's like fucking sacrilege these days to tell people
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because they're like i don't want to sound like settling yeah i don't want to settle it's like you Dude, everybody settles on something.
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I mean, you're settling in that you can't fly.
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at the moment.
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Yeah.
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You know, you're settling in that you need to go to bed every night.
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Yeah.
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I mean, dude, there's things that I've been with my wife for 14 years.
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There's things about her that still drive me fucking crazy.
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And, but I...
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I think she's like Latina, right?
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Well, yeah.
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Yeah.
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So that kind of comes, that's part of the course.
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It's yes, it's part for every course, but it's the Latina, the Latino versions are just much more dramatic.
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Very loud.
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Lots of tears.
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It's the spicy version.
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It's the fuego version.
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Exactly.
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It's fuego dating.
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Exactly.
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Um, But there's things about me that like she can't stand, but it's like, you just, accept at a certain point.
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You're like, okay, the good vastly outweighs the bad and you go with it.
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And I think...
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I think the reason... That.
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posted so well is you know, when you are meeting people when you are dating people.
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there's this whole kind of like, iceberg under the water of traits and characteristics and personality
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and connections and relationships that you're not really aware of that they're there.
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Um, but that's actually going to be the majority of the relationship.
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Right. And.
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really most people are kind of just going on vibes.
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you know when they're when they're dating somebody um
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And so I just think it's helpful to be like explicitly conscious about it and understand like, okay, if, if her mother's crazy like and you want to marry her,
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like you're going to have a crazy mother -in -law for 40 years.
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Looking for some crazy.
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Exactly.
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Like it's just put it on the plate because it's part of the course.
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You can't, you can't only, it's not a buffet.
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You don't just take the items you want.
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You got to take, it's the whole prefix menu.
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You know what the original name for this podcast was going to be?
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What's that?
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Crushing a Tuesday.
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The reason for that, glad that I didn't do it.
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Another one was mind and matter and another one was brain and brawn and it was, they were horrible.
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Modern wisdom was divine inspiration that came to me at three in the morning.
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Yeah, much better.
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Thank you.
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Uh, crushing Tuesday is not bad.
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Crushing a Tuesday was taken from a Tim Ferriss podcast.
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Okay.
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And what he said was most people try to optimize their lives around peak experiences.
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Mm -hmm.
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but your life is made up of average Tuesdays.
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Yeah.
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And your goal should be to make your average Tuesday as enjoyable as possible.
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Yeah.
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And that's what you're talking about here, that...
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what people look at is the amazing sex or the fascinating conversation.
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They don't realize What?
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Is this person like?
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normally?
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What is the middle of their bell curve of just how they operate?
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What do they do with Thank you with the most frequent interaction between them and reality?
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What do they do with their diet?
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That's pretty important.
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What do they do with their sleep pattern?
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That's pretty important.
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These are structural things.
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How do they deal with discomfort?
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How do they deal with things when they're hot?
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How do they deal when they're dysregulated?
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What's their family like?
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What are their timelines like?
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No, your timelines in the same.
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moving in the same direction.
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And that.. is what's the relationship with money like?
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That is what you are signing up for.
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Right.
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And that line, love does not cancel out people's flaws.
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In fact, it just makes you tolerate it for longer.
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Which is what's deranging to a lot of people
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that they get into a relationship with somebody who isn't right for them or isn't good for them. And the...
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capacity of their love, the intensity of their love just allows them to stay in something which isn't right for even longer.
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Yeah.
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And I think that people often feel guilty about having optimized for romantic chemistry,
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when what they should have been optimizing for is Is Tuesday evening with this person enjoyable?
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Right.
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And it's it's easy to optimize for that romantic chemistry
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because that's what you're flooded with when you meet somebody you really like.
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So that's what you're going to be biased towards.
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And I should I should add.
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So it's funny because I think I've posted a couple variations of this post over the years and.
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Every time there's always a couple angry people in the comments who are like,
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you this is unrealistic you shouldn't expect somebody to satisfy all these things for you
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and the point of this isn't
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that you have to go find somebody who has a mother
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that you like and who's like good with the opposite of
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that yeah no it's like it's you have to find somebody
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that you're willing to tolerate all of all of those things right
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so it's it's not um they're not trying to hit a a
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a ceiling like you're just trying to make find somebody who's like nothing falls below your floor
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and it's also i think a lot of it there are a couple other facets of this I think one is...
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understanding that what you, What are you particularly well -equipped to handle.
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So for example, my wife's Brazilian.
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She has a lot of feelings.
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And I'm just like very even keeled pretty much all the time.
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It really takes a lot for me to get worked up about anything.
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Like I'm, I'm the guy who doesn't give a fuck.
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So, It actually works extremely well.
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Like I can handle a lot of emotions.
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It doesn't really freak me out.
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I don't like get sucked into drama easily.
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So there's like a certain amount of self -knowledge of understanding
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this is the type of partner that I'm probably well suited for because my strength kind of, resonates well with their weakness or vice versa.
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Whereas like, My, you know, I have a very, very like,
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strong need for intellectual stimulation.
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I get bored extremely easily.
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and back when i was single like i i dated a lot of really cool girls
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but who just like weren't super smart or curious and i I was bored within minutes.
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And some of them were smoking hot.
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Some of them were awesome in bed.
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And I remember sitting there being like, I can't believe I'm going to break up with this girl.
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Like, she's, what am I doing?
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But, I was bored.
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Got nothing to talk to you about.
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Yeah, I was bored out of my mind.
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And your first date with your now wife, was you met in a nightclub and within 30 minutes we're talking about Russian literature.
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- Russian grammar.
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- Russian grammar.
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That's it.
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You know?
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- Yes, yes.
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Before we continue, most people in their 30s are still training hard.
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Their protein is dialed in.
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They sleep better than they did in their 20s.
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Discipline is not the issue, but recovery feels somewhat different strength gains take a little longer, the margin for error starts to shrink.
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It's not about pushing harder.
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or heading to timeline .com /modernwisdom and using the code modern Thank you.
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and Modern Wisdom at checkout.
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Congratulations, you made it to the end of a clip and the full -length episode is available right here.
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Go on.

Vocabulario y notas de pronunciación para esta lección

Esta lección de conversación de nivel B2 se basa en el vídeo “How to Find Someone You Can Be With Forever”. Este vídeo tiene 185 frases y 1842 palabras para practicar shadowing. La parte hablada dura 10:08. El hablante habla rápido, unas 182 palabras por minuto, así que espera sonidos enlazados y reducidos. El 84 % de las palabras está entre las 3.000 más comunes del inglés; conviene repasar el resto antes de empezar.

Vocabulario clave de este vídeo

Las 15 palabras más avanzadas del vídeo, con su pronunciación y significado:

PalabraPronunciaciónSignificado
timeline sustantivo/ˈtaɪmˌlaɪn/cronología, línea de tiempo
optimize verbo/ˈɑptɪmaɪz/optimizar
bore verbo/boɹ/aburrir
tolerate verbo/ˈtɑ.lə.ɹeɪt/tolerar, soportar
crush verbo/kɹʌʃ/aplastar, destripar
mitochondrion sustantivo/ˌmaɪtəˈkɑndɹiən/mitocondria
flaw sustantivo/flɔ/falla
enjoyable adjetivo/ɛnˈd͡ʒɔɪ.ə.bl̩/agradable, ameno
podcast sustantivo/ˈpɑdˌkæst/podcast, pódcast
grammar sustantivo/ˈɡɹæm.ə(ɹ)/gramática
perception sustantivo/pɚˈsɛpʃ(ə)n/percepción
cancel verbo/ˈkæn.sl̩/tachar
brainwash sustantivo/ˈbɹeɪnwɒʃ/lavado de cerebro, comedura de coco
cleanliness sustantivo/ˈklɛn.li.nᵻs/limpieza
clinically adverbioclínicamente

Phrasal verbs que vas a escuchar

PalabraSignificado
cross out verbotachar, tarjar
get up to verbocometer

Frases que vale la pena repetir

Frases cortas y completas del vídeo que puedes reutilizar en la conversación diaria:

  • You're choosing their sleep schedule.
  • You're choosing their money habits.
  • You're signing up to live in that ecosystem.
  • It's find your three non -negotiables and then...
  • I mean, you're settling in that you can't fly.

Gramática en este vídeo

Las estructuras que más usa el hablante, con las palabras exactas del vídeo:

EstructuraEn el vídeo
Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — una acción que empezó antes y continúaI've been having · have been optimizing
Voz pasiva be + participio pasado — importa lo que ocurre, no quién lo haceyou've been brainwashed · was taken · is made
Oraciones de relativo who / which + oración — información extra sobre una persona o cosasomebody who isn · somebody who has · guy who doesn
Present perfect have/has + participio pasado — una acción pasada que sigue importando ahorayou've been brainwashed · I've been · I've posted

Pronunciación a tener en cuenta

El hablante usa 67 contracciones y formas reducidas, como you're, they're, I'm. Dilas en su forma corta, tal como las oyes.

  • Los sonidos de “th”: ethic /ˈɛθ.ɪk/, underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/
  • Los sonidos de “sh” y “zh”: crush /kɹʌʃ/, perception /pɚˈsɛpʃ(ə)n/, brainwash /ˈbɹeɪnwɒʃ/, foundational /faʊnˈdeɪ.ʃə.nəl/, negotiable /nɪˈɡoʊʃəbəl/
  • Palabras largas — cuida el acento: mitochondrion /ˌmaɪtəˈkɑndɹiən/, foundational /faʊnˈdeɪ.ʃə.nəl/, mitochondrial /ˌmaɪ.təˈkɑːn.dɹi.əl/, negotiable /nɪˈɡoʊʃəbəl/, stimulation /stɪm.jʊˈleɪ.ʃən/

Sonidos difíciles para hispanohablantes:

  • s + consonante al inicio — sin añadir una “e” delante: stimulation /stɪm.jʊˈleɪ.ʃən/, spicy /ˈspaɪsi/, scroll /skɹoʊl/, structural /ˈstɹʌk(t͡)ʃəɹəl/
  • /v/ — no es /b/: los dientes tocan el labio inferior: validate /ˈvæl.ɪ.deɪt/, vastly /ˈvæstli/, vibe /vaɪb/, variation /ˌvɛəɹiˈeɪʃn̩/, curve /kɚv/
  • /z/ — sonora, no /s/: optimize /ˈɑptɪmaɪz/, resonate /ˈɹɛz.əˌneɪt/

Cómo practicar con este vídeo

  1. Escucha el vídeo entero una vez sin hablar y anota las palabras que no conoces.
  2. Empieza a velocidad 0,75×, haz shadowing frase por frase y vuelve a la velocidad normal cuando te resulte fácil.
  3. Grábate y compara con el original, prestando atención a palabras como timeline, optimize, bore.

¿Qué es la Técnica de Shadowing?

Shadowing es una técnica de aprendizaje de idiomas respaldada por la ciencia, desarrollada originalmente para la formación de intérpretes profesionales y popularizada por el políglota Dr. Alexander Arguelles. El método es simple pero poderoso: escuchas audio en inglés nativo y lo repites en voz alta de inmediato, como una sombra que sigue al hablante con solo 1-2 segundos de retraso. A diferencia de la escucha pasiva o los ejercicios de gramática, el shadowing obliga a tu cerebro y músculos de la boca a procesar y reproducir simultáneamente patrones de habla reales. Las investigaciones muestran que mejora significativamente la precisión de la pronunciación, la entonación, el ritmo, el habla conectada, la comprensión auditiva y la fluidez al hablar, convirtiéndola en una de las metodologías más efectivas para la preparación del IELTS Speaking y la comunicación en inglés en el mundo real.

Técnica de shadowing: lee la guía completa paso a paso →