Pratique du Shadowing: Effortless English - Longtime Affair - Commentary - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec la vidéo
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Hello, welcome to the commentary for Long Time Affair.
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This is an interesting letter, I think.
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So it's talking about basically two people, they're married.
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So there's a woman and she's married to somebody,
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a man obviously, and then there's a guy and he's also married.
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But these two people are having an affair with each other.
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And an affair is a relationship outside of a marriage marriage.
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So if you have a girlfriend who's not your wife,
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that relationship is called an affair.
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Now we're saying with a woman or a man.
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So they're having an affair.
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It's been happening for a while.
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So it's not a short thing.
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It's a long-term thing.
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And they love each other very, very deeply.
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Unconditional love, they describe it.
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Our roots are intertwined.
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So their deep feelings are intertwined together.
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But they're in their 50s,
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so they're older, and they don't want to leave their families.
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Maybe they have children, probably adult children,
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and they don't want to destroy their families.
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So this is kind of an interesting situation.
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And I used this in my class here in San Francisco.
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There was a very interesting discussion about this article,
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and I think there were a lot of different opinions, actually.
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I was a little surprised.
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So some people thought, you know, oh, it's terrible.
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They must end the affair and they're doing a very, very bad thing.
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And that was kind of,
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I would say that would be the normal American reaction,
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the normal American opinion.
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However, most of the students did not have that opinion.
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And most of my students are Asian,
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Japanese and Korean and Thai,
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and most of them actually had very different ideas.
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I would say about half of them said they should continue doing what they're doing,
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but continue to be secret.
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So they said, continue the affair because they love each other very much,
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but they also love their families and don't want to hurt their families.
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So they said, These students said,
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just continue doing what you are doing,
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but keep it a secret so you don't hurt your families.
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So just continue going.
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And they thought that this is not so terrible because these people love each other very, very much.
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And it's not horrible.
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They're not bad people.
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So that was another opinion.
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And then a final opinion was that they should get a divorce.
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Each of them should divorce their families,
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their spouses, and they should marry each other.
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So they should stop this affair because they obviously love each other so much.
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Maybe they don't have the same feeling for their wife or husband.
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They should get divorced, each of them,
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and then marry each other.
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And that was the third opinion.
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And those two opinions, those last two,
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continue or get divorced, were definitely the most popular opinions in my class.
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A little surprising to me.
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And it showed me something that,
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you know, this idea is very cultural.
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The idea of having affairs and the idea of what is good or bad in marriage has differences in different cultures.
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Not that anybody thinks, you know, encourages affairs.
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Nobody was saying, oh, affairs are good.
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Every husband and wife should have an affair.
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Nobody said that.
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But there were different attitudes about,
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is it terrible a little bit?
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Is it terrible, really, really horrible, bad?
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Is it not so bad?
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And that was very different.
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Each individual had different opinions about that and I could see different cultural ideas about that too.
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A little bit later, maybe a couple weeks later,
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I was in the bookstore here in San Francisco down at Union Square downtown and I saw a book about this subject,
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this exact subject, the cultural ideas,
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cultural opinions about having affairs in marriage.
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And I didn't read the whole book.
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I didn't want to buy it.
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I just kind of skimmed it.
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I read it quickly.
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I read the summary and I skimmed through it quickly.
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But it had the basic idea that it's true,
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that every country has different rules,
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different opinions about affairs, whether they are really,
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really bad or a little bad or if they're okay as long as they're secret.
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There are many different opinions.
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It talked about how in Japan there are different opinions,
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that it's not horrible, but that it can be common among some men.
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And how other places, you know,
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they have the idea if the man pays for sex with a prostitute,
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then it's not cheating, it's not an affair,
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because there's no emotional involvement.
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And so some cultures think,
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oh, that's not so bad.
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And other cultures think, oh,
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it's pretty normal for couples to have an affair with somebody else,
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but they should be very kind of secretive about it.
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They shouldn't let everybody know, and it's not terrible.
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And then it talked about in this book how America actually is quite different from much of the world because in America,
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the opinions are very strong that affairs are horrible, terrible, almost evil.
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And this is stronger than in most places in the world.
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You know, many people have this idea,
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but in America this idea is very,
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very, very strong, stronger than in other countries.
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That was interesting to me because when I chose this letter for my class,
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I thought everybody would agree,
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oh, this is bad, they should end it immediately, they're really bad people.
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Because I'm thinking like an American,
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I'm thinking that's what most Americans would say.
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But in fact, it's not what most of my students said, not at all.
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In fact, I think maybe only one student said something like that,
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and all the other ones were less judgmental, less strong about it.
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So interesting, very interesting.
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It shows again how culture can influence our ideas about this quite a bit, about many things.
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Very basic things, such as relationships,
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are affected by culture, and often it's in a subtle way.
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It's not obvious sometimes.
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It's a little more deep,
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those differences, but those differences are there.
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And learning to communicate effectively is important so we can understand those differences.
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And I don't think in these kind of cases,
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these kinds of situations, there's no right or wrong answer.
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God didn't write something down and we all must follow it.
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I think that every culture has reasons for their beliefs,
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and there are good and bad points to those cultural beliefs.
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And, you know, I'm very much like this idea of not holding on to opinions too strongly,
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because, you know, we never really know.
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We can't ever really be sure about things.
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So it's always good to remember,
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even if we have a strong opinion,
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it's good to remember that it's just an opinion.
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And maybe it's good for us,
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but maybe other people in other situations,
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in other cultures, in other places,
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with other circumstances, maybe our opinion is not good for them.
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And it's always good to remember that.
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I try to remember that.
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I have strong opinions about things,
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certainly about education and teaching and about many things.
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And sometimes they're too strong.
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And I have to remind myself,
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you know AJ it's just an opinion it's not right it's
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not 100% correct some God in heaven did not give you
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this opinion it's just your opinion it's good for me it's good for my experiences
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but in the end finally it's only an opinion and it's not good for everybody.
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Alright, another issue about this letter,
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this long time affair situation,
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is the issue of a double standard.
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And this is something we also talked about in my class and something that I feel very strongly about.
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What's a double standard?
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We've had that phrase before.
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A double standard is a rule that is different for different people.
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For example, a rule that is different for women than it is for men.
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And we see this double standard everywhere in the world about having affairs.
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I'm sure you know, and I'm sure you will agree,
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that in most countries, if a man has an affair,
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it's less serious than if a woman has an affair, right?
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So a man is married,
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and he has sex with another woman.
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Maybe he pays a prostitute,
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Maybe he has a girlfriend.
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And, you know, in different countries,
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we might think different things about this.
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But we might think this is bad.
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But in most countries, I want to say all countries,
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almost all countries, most people will still have a little bit of an attitude,
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oh, that's normal for men.
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It's not so terrible.
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He's a man.
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But if we change the situation,
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we have a woman, a wife,
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she's married, she has an affair,
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she pays a man to have sex,
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or she has a boyfriend.
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In most cultures, almost all,
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we will judge the woman much worse.
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She's terrible.
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She's a prostitute.
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She's a slut.
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She's horrible.
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Right?
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It's much worse, much more negative for the woman than for the man.
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that is a double standard.
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I think it's wrong.
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I think it's 100% wrong that,
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you know, the woman, if she does something, she's terrible, horrible.
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Everybody criticizes her and says she's a bad person.
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But if a man does the same thing, oh, it's okay.
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It's not so bad.
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It's normal.
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Or it's a little bad, but it's not terrible.
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And that is a clear double standard we see that in almost every country I know of.
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In my class discussion, everybody agreed in their own country,
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this was a double standard.
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In Thailand, if a man has an affair,
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it's less serious than if a woman does.
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In Japan, same situation.
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In America, same.
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I don't know about Europe.
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My guess is probably same.
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And that's not good.
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It shows that, to be honest,
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women are still not equal.
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You're getting closer, especially in some countries.
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In the United States, women are getting much closer to being equal.
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In Europe, I'm sure.
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In Japan and in many countries.
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But there's still a lot of work to do.
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There's still so many double standards about women where the woman is treated more badly or she's judged more harshly,
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more severely, she's judged in a more negative way than a man for the exact same situation.
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And of course we see this in working too,
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that women are getting more jobs,
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they're getting better and better jobs in the United States.
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But still, if you look at the top,
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the top of the company,
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the president, the CEO, the very top officers, they're still mostly men.
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If you look at the American government,
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the senators, the congress people,
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the president, of course, guess what?
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Mostly men still.
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So we still have this double standard.
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But in politics, in business, in culture, everywhere.
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So there's still a lot of work to do.
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I think it's work that women have to do.
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But I think men also have to realize this.
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and they have to understand it and they need to help change it because it's something that affects them as well.
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You know, if you have a daughter,
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if you have a girlfriend,
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do you really want her to be treated badly?
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Do you really want her to have a double standard?
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I don't, and I hope you don't either.
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So it's a big issue,
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this idea of double standard,
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and I think that we see the double standard issue most strongly about sex when it comes to sex.
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Sexual relationships.
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That's where women really get treated badly and they get judged differently and much more negative.
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A man has sex with many women.
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Oh, he's cool.
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A woman has sex with many men.
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Oh, she's a slut.
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She's terrible.
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Same situation.
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The woman is treated very negatively, very badly.
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The man is almost admired, almost complimented.
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It's wrong.
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It's terrible.
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and about affairs as we just discussed same thing a man has an affair oh it's not
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so bad a woman has an affair terrible terrible terrible
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so this is a double standard
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that in the area of sex even I think we see
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this a lot with even enjoying sex men are taught to enjoy sex
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if a man really likes sex a lot it's great
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and he's very passionate then that scene is wonderful he's a passionate man
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But if a woman really enjoys sex and she's very passionate and very direct about it,
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then she gets criticized a lot.
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Sometimes she's criticized.
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And so we see a lot of women who are afraid to enjoy sex or afraid to say they enjoy sex.
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They're afraid people will criticize them.
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Another double standard that we see with women,
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especially in this area of sexual relationships.
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So anyway, those are the two big issues I wanted to talk about.
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one being the double standard that we see with women and men in most cultures, most societies.
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And then the second thing was just the cultural differences from country to country,
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region to region, about this idea of having affairs.
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How bad is it?
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Well, that depends on where you're from.
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It probably depends on your age.
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Many different things.
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All right.
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Well, very interesting topic this time.
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Hope you enjoyed it.
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Remember, please help us out.
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Go to Delicious.
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Right?
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Go to Delicious and register.
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And then please go to effortlessenglish.com and .org and tag us.
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You go to our website and then you click the tag button that you downloaded after you registered.
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And registering with Delicious is free.
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And it really helps our club.
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It helps us a lot.
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It will help us get new members,
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recruit new members, without spending money for advertising.
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It helps me keep the price low,
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low, low so everyone can do it.
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If necessary, in the future, I will advertise.
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I will do more Google ads.
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I will be more aggressive about marketing and trying to get more members because I want more members,
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it gives more energy to the club, right?
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More people participating.
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It's more fun.
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So I will do that in the future
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if necessary hope it's not necessary because if I have to do that I will have to raise the price.
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So please help us out.
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Go to Delicious, register, and then tag our websites.
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All right, I'll see you next time.
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Hope you enjoyed it.
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Bye-bye.
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Vocabulaire et conseils d’expression pour cette leçon
Cette leçon d’expression orale de niveau C1 s’appuie sur la vidéo « Effortless English - Longtime Affair - Commentary ». Les mots qui reviennent le plus souvent : affair, opinion, terrible, double, standard. Cette vidéo contient 297 phrases et 2418 mots à répéter en shadowing. La partie parlée dure 15:57. Le locuteur parle à un rythme naturel d’environ 152 mots par minute, proche d’une conversation courante. 89 % des mots font partie des 3 000 mots les plus courants en anglais ; le reste mérite d’être vu avant de commencer.
Vocabulaire clé de cette vidéo
Les 15 mots les plus avancés de la vidéo, avec leur prononciation et leur sens :
| Mot | Prononciation | Sens |
|---|---|---|
| criticize verbe | /ˈkɹɪtɪsaɪz/ | critiquer |
| litter nom | /ˈlɪt.ɚ/ | litière |
| passionate adjectif | /ˈpæʃənɪt/ | passionné |
| intertwine verbe | /ˌɪntəɹˈtwaɪn/ | enchevêtrer, entrelacer |
| skim verbe | /skɪm/ | dépasser doucement, effleurer |
| judgmental adjectif | /ˌd͡ʒʌd͡ʒˈmɛnt(ə)l/ | jugeur |
| secretive adjectif | /ˈsiːkɹɪtɪv/ | secret, cachottier |
| unconditional adjectif | /ˌʌnkənˈdɪʃənəl/ | inconditionnel |
| circumstance nom | /ˈsɝ.kəmˌstæns/ | circonstance |
| advertise verbe | /ˈædvɚˌtaɪ̯z/ | annoncer |
| recruit verbe | /ɹɪˈkɹut/ | recruter, enrôler |
| compliment nom | /ˈkɑmpləmənt/ | compliment |
| spouse nom | /spaʊ̯s/ | époux, épouse |
| admire verbe | /ədˈmaɪɹ/ | admirer |
| cheat verbe | /ˈt͡ʃiːt/ | tricher |
Des phrases à répéter
Des phrases courtes et complètes de la vidéo, à réutiliser dans la conversation de tous les jours :
- I didn't want to buy it.
- We can't ever really be sure about things.
- We've had that phrase before.
- You're getting closer, especially in some countries.
- I think it's work that women have to do.
La grammaire de cette vidéo
Les structures que le locuteur utilise le plus, avec les mots exacts de la vidéo :
| Structure | Dans la vidéo |
|---|---|
| Phrases conditionnelles if + proposition, will/would + verbe — une condition et son résultat | If necessary, in the future, I will advertise |
| Voix passive be + participe passé — l’accent est mis sur ce qui arrive, pas sur qui le fait | is called · are intertwined · are affected |
Prononciation à surveiller
Le locuteur utilise 39 contractions et formes réduites, comme they're, don't, I'm. Prononcez-les sous leur forme courte, telles que vous les entendez.
- Les sons « sh » et « zh »: passionate /ˈpæʃənɪt/, harshly /ˈhɑːʃli/, unconditional /ˌʌnkənˈdɪʃənəl/
Les sons difficiles pour les francophones :
- /tʃ/ et /dʒ/ — à ne pas adoucir en « ch » et « j »: judgmental /ˌd͡ʒʌd͡ʒˈmɛnt(ə)l/, cheat /ˈt͡ʃiːt/
- /r/ anglais — langue recourbée, sans frotter la gorge: criticize /ˈkɹɪtɪsaɪz/, intertwine /ˌɪntəɹˈtwaɪn/, secretive /ˈsiːkɹɪtɪv/, recruit /ɹɪˈkɹut/, admire /ədˈmaɪɹ/
Comment s’entraîner avec cette vidéo
- Écoutez la vidéo en entier une fois sans parler et notez les mots que vous ne connaissez pas.
- Commencez à la vitesse 0,75×, répétez phrase par phrase, puis revenez à la vitesse normale quand cela devient facile.
- Enregistrez-vous et comparez avec l’original, en faisant attention à des mots comme criticize, litter, passionate.
Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?
Le Shadowing est une technique d'apprentissage des langues fondée sur la science, développée à l'origine pour la formation des interprètes professionnels. Le principe est simple mais puissant : vous écoutez de l'anglais natif et le répétez immédiatement à voix haute — comme une ombre suivant le locuteur avec un décalage de 1 à 2 secondes. Les recherches montrent une amélioration significative de la précision de la prononciation, de l'intonation, du rythme, des liaisons, de la compréhension orale et de la fluidité.