Shadowing Practice: How To Subtly Attract Your Crush - Learn English Speaking with Video
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In his international best-selling book, The Art of Seduction, Robert Greene wrote, your greatest power in seduction is your ability to turn away,
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to make others come after you, delaying their satisfaction.
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Do you think playing hard to get works best, or do you prefer to be direct?
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It can be difficult to figure out the best way to attract your crush.
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By the end of this video, you'll learn tips backed by scientific research that will teach you how to step up your game and keep them interested.
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Here's how to attract your crush and leave them wanting more.
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To smile or not to smile.
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When you're flirting with your crush, you should smile to come across as approachable and show them that you're interested.
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Or should you?
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Research shows that it might not be that simple.
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Smiling can be perceived as either attractive or unattractive, and this depends on your gender.
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But there's one expression that seems to be universally attractive, regardless of gender, and it's probably not what you think.
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In a 2011 study published in the journal Emotion, women were perceived as most attractive when they were smiling and looked happy.
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For men, the results were the complete opposite.
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Smiling was their least attractive facial expression.
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So if you're a man, the cool and mysterious persona may be more seductive to your crush.
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But there was one facial expression that was perceived as relatively attractive regardless of gender.
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Shame.
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When someone had their head and eyes tilted downwards and narrowed their posture, expressing shame, they were rated as attractive whether they were male or female.
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When you're with your crush, see how they react when you innocently look down or avert your gaze every once in a while.
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just might help attract them to you.
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The right approach.
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Imagine your crush is sitting at an empty table at school.
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Now is your chance to make a move.
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When you go up to your crush to talk to them, should you approach them from the front and sit across from them or sit beside them?
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Turns out, like a lot of other attraction strategies, the answer depends on your crush's gender.
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In a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, participants were approached by a researcher who sat either beside them or directly in front of them.
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Results showed that male participants had a more negative reaction when a female researcher approached them from the front.
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On the other hand, females didn't like being approached from the side by a male researcher.
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According to these findings, if you're trying to attract a man, the best way to approach them is to sit beside them rather than across from them.
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But if your crush is a woman, go with the head-on strategy and sit in front of them.
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It's such a subtle move, they won't even know you're doing it.
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Got jokes?
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Does your crush have a good sense of humor?
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More importantly, do you?
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Philosopher William James once said, common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds.
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A sense of humor is just common sense dancing.
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However, researcher Eric Bressler at McMaster University found that men and women define humor differently.
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Knowing this can help you step up your seduction game.
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Bressler found that women defined someone with a good sense of humor as someone who could make them laugh.
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And they preferred men who have a good sense of humor 62% of the time.
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Conversely, men thought someone had a good sense of humor when they appreciated their own humor, AKA laughed at their jokes.
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They preferred women who laughed at their jokes 65% of the time.
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The takeaway, if your crush is a man, you can pique their interest by laughing at their jokes just a little more.
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And if your crush is a woman, you can attract them by making them laugh rather than laughing at their jokes.
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The magic touch.
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Combining physical touch with the other tips we've mentioned will make you even more attractive to your crush.
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Key is to keep it subtle.
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A 2007 study published in the journal Social Influence had male researchers either ask women for their numbers
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or ask them to dance.
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In both cases, they found that if they touched a woman's forearm for just one or two seconds before asking her, she was more likely to say yes.
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Light touches on the arm are an innocent and simple way to attract your crush.
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Of course, this technique depends on your relationship with them, their boundaries, and your cultural norms.
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But if you and your crush are comfortable with it, giving them a soft touch on the arm every once in a while might be the perfect way to arouse their interest.
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Thanks for watching, Psych2Goers.
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We hope you found this video helpful.
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Remember, these tips shouldn't be used to manipulate your crush.
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At the end of the day, the best way to attract someone if you want a genuine relationship with them is to be yourself.
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Will you be trying any of these tips?
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Do you have any of your own attraction tips to offer that have worked for you in the past?
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Share your ideas in the comments below.
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Keep in mind that because scientific research has focused primarily on straight men and women, some of the studies in this video don't reflect everyone's experience.
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If you have a perspective to share that hasn't been mentioned, we'd love to hear from you and start an open and inclusive conversation.
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Please share your thoughts in the comments.
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Thanks for watching and see you in the next one.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This B2 speaking lesson is built on the video “How To Subtly Attract Your Crush”. The speaker keeps coming back to these words: crush, humor, sense, attract, attractive. This video has 65 sentences and 950 words to shadow. The speech runs for 4:50. The speaker talks fast, about 196 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 83% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.
Key vocabulary in this video
The 15 most advanced words in the video, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| crush verb | /kɹʌʃ/ | To press between two hard objects; to squeeze so as to alter the natural shape or integrity, or to force together into a mass. |
| humour noun | /ˈhjuːmɚ/ | The quality of being amusing, comical, funny. |
| researcher noun | /ˈɹiˌsɝ.t͡ʃɚ/ | One who researches. |
| seduction noun | /sɪˈdʌk.ʃn̩/ | The act of seducing. |
| perceive verb | /pɚˈsiv/ | To become aware of, through the physical senses, to see; to understand. |
| beside | /bɪˈsaɪd/ | Next to; at the side of. |
| depend verb | /dɪˈpɛnd/ | To be contingent or conditioned; to have something as a necessary condition |
| participant noun | /pɑːɹˈtɪsəpənt/ | One who participates. |
| subtle adjective | /ˈsʌtəl/ | Of an action or movement: very delicate or slight, and thus barely noticeable; not obvious; inconspicuous, unintrusive. |
| facial adjective | /ˈfeɪ.ʃəl/ | Of or affecting the face. |
| attraction noun | /əˈtɹækʃn̩/ | The tendency to attract. |
| approachable adjective | /əˈpɹəʊ.t͡ʃə.bəl/ | Easily approached; easy to talk to. |
| arouse verb | /əˈɹaʊz/ | To stimulate or induce (feelings); pique. |
| downwards adverb | /ˈdaʊnwɚdz/ | Towards a lower place; towards what is below. |
| forearm noun | /ˈfɔːˌɹɑːm/ | The part of the arm between the wrist and the elbow. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| step up verb | To increase, augment, or advance, especially by one or more steps. |
| come across verb | To change sides; to cross over to work for the opposition. |
| figure out verb | To come to understand; to discover or find a solution; to deduce. |
| look down verb | To lower one's eyes; to direct one's look downwards. |
| turn away verb | To rotate so as not to face someone or something. |
| turn out verb | To end up; to result. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- Does your crush have a good sense of humor?
- More importantly, do you?
- Will you be trying any of these tips?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | can be perceived · were perceived · was perceived |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | we've mentioned · have worked · has focused |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | someone who could · men who have · women who laughed |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 14 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, didn't, don't. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: crush /kɹʌʃ/, seduction /sɪˈdʌk.ʃn̩/, facial /ˈfeɪ.ʃəl/, attraction /əˈtɹækʃn̩/, satisfaction /sætɪsˈfækʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: participant /pɑːɹˈtɪsəpənt/, approachable /əˈpɹəʊ.t͡ʃə.bəl/, innocently /ˈɪnəsəntli/, universally /ˌjunɪˈvɝsəli/, manipulate /məˈnɪp.jʊ.leɪt/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like crush, humour, researcher.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.