Shadowing Practice: Sara Saffari on God, Grief & Finding Purpose - Learn English Speaking with Video
Creating lesson...
1
Fitness probably like saved my life.
2
There's no better feeling than when a guy comes up to me and they're like, oh, you motivated me to go to the gym.
3
I'm like, that's so sick.
4
Because that was like my purpose of it.
5
I struggled with an eating disorder.
6
I felt so lost with everything.
7
Working out like gave me a sense of purpose.
8
I gained like 30 pounds.
9
I feel healthy now.
10
I think about God every day.
11
I think about it and it becomes a lot to think about.
12
What do those thoughts feel like?
13
Overwhelming and like confusing, honestly.
14
My mom, she's Muslim.
15
She prays five times a day.
16
She's amazing.
17
We never had pork in the house.
18
Like, I don't drink alcohol.
19
I don't smoke.
20
At six years old, did you feel that you lost your dad?
21
You know, I feel like I suppress, and I still do, like, the feelings.
22
How do you deal with grief?
23
And have you dealt with it?
24
I don't know if I've fully dealt with it.
25
It's like...
26
It's okay.
27
I still, like, get emotional.
28
I'm Liana Deeb.
29
This is Being Human.
30
I'm glad you're here.
31
Hello, and welcome back to another episode of the Being Human podcast.
32
I'm your host, Leon Adib, and today I am sitting down with Sarah Safari.
33
I am so excited for this episode
34
because Sarah is someone who is honestly one of the biggest fitness creators in the space, and she is not only just a fitness creator,
35
but she has been able to showcase her personality through content and her humor, her just like vibrance through the screen, and truly, I feel like she makes an impact in so many people's lives,
36
and I'm sure she realizes that, but it's just... So sweet.
37
but honestly i'm so excited to get to know sarah on a deeper level
38
and understand the things that she goes through as being a creator
39
and how this all started as well so thank you
40
so much for coming on today oh my god it's a pleasure i've said this before
41
so many times when people ask me like oh who did i look up to before doing content
42
and it was always you and patty oh yeah really yeah i'm
43
so love you guys i feel like you guys have really good content
44
and what i like most about your content is that it's
45
so true to you thank you which like is hard in the creator space
46
because like you always end up or most people not you end up like going you know like it it changes
47
maybe your morals or anything so you're really good at staying true to yourself
48
which is something I admire thank you so much yeah
49
so I guess I really want to understand what like how you started out posting content
50
and where it all began
51
so I started posting content I think at this point has to be like four years
52
if not longer like four years and a few months maybe
53
um prior to that I'd already been working out for a year okay
54
and I'd seen Bradley Martin like he has a gym he
55
still has a gym it was a different gym at the time but he has zoo culture in
56
Woodland Hills at the time and it was like a it was like a $60 day pass
57
and I was like I can't pay $60 to like go to the gym for a day
58
but I really wanted to go
59
and everyone would always talk about zoo culture one day I just sent him a dm
60
and I was like hey like can I come and train
61
and he was like yeah sure and then like nothing came about it
62
and then a few maybe like a few months later I
63
ended up going he invited me I went didn't pay the 60 bucks
64
and uh he was like you should start posting content like you'd be really good at it
65
and I was like I do I post Instagram stories
66
and he says you know you can't grow from Instagram stories you have to post
67
Instagram reels and that's when Instagram had just introduced like the reels tab or whatever
68
and I was like okay it's worth a shot I went home posted my first reel
69
and then like never stopped posting well and
70
that has been four years now almost four years a little over four years honestly
71
and in the beginning what was your content like then versus
72
what it is now I think in the beginning it was
73
way more focused through the gym solo stuff just at the gym working out
74
and now i do love like collaborating with people and like working with people and making videos with other people and
75
yeah just any opportunity
76
that comes my way usually i say yes would you say
77
you're the same person as you are on screen versus like at home
78
because i feel like when i also watch your content you're always like you know
79
so funny feels like you're truly being yourself would you say
80
that sarah is the same on camera versus not on camera
81
i would say it's definitely the same i think on camera
82
maybe sometimes it's a little more like drastic well you know like a little bit like more
83
but i am always like i am even with my friends off camera i'm trying like i'm always cracking jokes
84
or like trying to like lighten the mood i think it
85
is you know my true self in videos as well like Filming videos is the easiest thing for me.
86
Like, there's no plan ever.
87
There's no script.
88
There's nothing.
89
It's just, you know, I'll wake up and I'll be like, oh, today seems like a good day to film.
90
Like, I'll hit up my filmer and we'll be like, hey, like, you want to hit the gym in 30 minutes?
91
And then we'll just film.
92
Wait, so you're telling me with all the content that you create, there's no plan?
93
No, no plan.
94
What?
95
Like, sometimes if I'm filming with Patti, I'll be like, yo, Patti, are you free Monday?
96
Like, I'll try to give her, like, two, three days in advance.
97
Or if I'm filming with, like, Chris Tran or Bradley, i try to give them like a day
98
or two in advance like hey are you free saturday are you free monday to film
99
but there's no plan ever wow no
100
and even for like your solo content your post it's kind
101
of just like going those are never planned never no wow like i'll wake up
102
and i'll be like oh i haven't posted on instagram in
103
two days let me throw up a picture oh my goodness
104
yeah there's not much thought behind anything behind anything you know it's so crazy like hearing this perspective
105
because I just finished doing a podcast with June.
106
Do you know June?
107
He's like, he's done like creator college.
108
Oh, I'm sure I'd know his content or his face if I saw him.
109
And it's all about strategy and like planning and like, you know, but the fact that you have built a platform and it's truly based off of how, not how you feel essentially,
110
because I'm sure you still go through times where you don't feel like creating content.
111
Yeah.
112
But you still do it.
113
Yeah.
114
Oh no. There's like the people like watching my YouTube, they'll see it.
115
They'll be like, yo, Sarah's so down bad.
116
Like, even if I'm sad, i'm just sad on camera like it's just it's based off
117
that the feelings of
118
that day even watching some of your videos people will make
119
jokes like oh sarah's sad in those moments are you really sad
120
but you're still showing up yeah you have
121
but that's the thing people always ask me what it is
122
with con like oh how do i start content it's consistency
123
all of it is consistency there's like there's an layer of luck
124
that goes into it that i don't think anyone talks about
125
a lot of it is also luck like blowing up um part of it's luck
126
but consistency also really matters who you're surrounded with like
127
if i wasn't with bradley like at the beginning i probably wouldn't be where i'm at today
128
because bradley definitely helped me with advice
129
and i was showed up in his video so
130
that gained me traction so but
131
that had to do with luck like he saw my dm
132
and then was like open to making content with me
133
so a lot of it is luck a lot of it is just consistency so So for me, I like can't miss a week.
134
So even if it's a video that I don't like, I'm like, I don't love this video.
135
I still post it.
136
Would you say it's luck?
137
Or would you say it's because you, because I mean, you sent the DM, right?
138
So that's like you put yourself out there.
139
And I'm sure even opportunities, I'm sure you still get uncomfortable at times filming or collaborating.
140
Do you ever, or do you ever feel like, I'm no, I'm just going to be me.
141
I really don't get uncomfortable much, but I think that's just like a characteristic I have outside of filming.
142
As well, I don't really get uncomfortable.
143
Sometimes I can seem a bit awkward, but I'm never uncomfortable.
144
Or like nervous.
145
No. No?
146
No, I don't really get nervous either.
147
Where does that come from?
148
At the end of the day, I'm like, oh, I am kind of who I am.
149
And if people like it, they like it.
150
And if they don't, they don't.
151
Sometimes I'm scared like, oh, I make a joke and it's a little too edgy.
152
I don't want anyone to ever get offended or anything.
153
So those things I'll overthink because I don't have like any hatred in my heart.
154
Like sometimes I'll just make a joke and I'm like, okay, that might have been like a little too far like maybe let's cut
155
that but um I'm never nervous about who I am did
156
that take a while for you to get to
157
that place in life where you're like oh I'm I know who I am
158
or was there ever times where you felt insecure oh no
159
I do I do feel insecure a lot I do feel insecure I feel insecure a good amount yeah
160
but I'm never like I'm never nervous
161
but I am insecure about like who I am sometimes
162
or how I show up
163
or maybe also a lot of insecurity sometimes comes from not who I am
164
but then how other people are treating me I get into I'm like oh is
165
that a reflection of who I am or what I'm doing
166
but it's usually not it's I have to realize like it
167
might just be them it's not always like me how do
168
you navigate those feelings are you just like dealing with them
169
yeah I deal with them I've never I've thought about it
170
so much like have you ever done therapy yes you have it's hit or miss
171
I've been to therapists that help and then I've been to therapists
172
that just make me feel worse a little bit
173
and now I'm kind of not really in a I don't
174
get therapy I journal journal yeah journaling yes I've been journaling not pen
175
and paper which I feel like pen and paper might be better
176
but like I'll write in my notes app like
177
if I'm like feeling a certain way
178
and then I feel like those thoughts are spiraling like I'll just pull out the notes app
179
and like start typing away or like doing voice notes
180
so I feel like that that does help for sure but I've never done therapy and I've always like thought about it.
181
I mean, I know a lot of people that like it helps them, but yeah, I guess it's like trying a couple maybe and seeing if it actually does.
182
Yeah, that just sounds terrible.
183
Like going through the process of finding the right one sounds like a waste of time.
184
It might not be a waste of time, but it sounds like a waste of time.
185
Yeah, no, I know what you mean.
186
I also hear you talk about on, like you've done like YouTube videos on it before, sometimes in collaborations where people will make jokes and say things.
187
And also I guess people thinking that you're with a person just
188
because of the content you create and you kind of also have this fear
189
and i talk a lot about like loneliness and finding the right partner
190
and stuff dude that's the biggest that's my biggest fear yep
191
that is 100 my biggest fear i'm like am i gonna find the right person
192
because of the content do you feel like it's i feel like content definitely does not help my case
193
because no one wants to see like their person like making content with other people of the opposite gender
194
if that makes sense like i mean no one probably wants to see that but
195
I've tried to tone back on that
196
and just make a lot of solo content
197
which I've been enjoying just as much
198
but I think content just being in the creator space
199
and like living in LA
200
and such I think it does hinder like the idea of
201
like maybe finding my person I mean I'm a firm believer
202
that like the right person will come into your life at the right time
203
and even what you're doing it takes a secure man to be in
204
that right but I guess like how do you navigate like bringing in
205
that so are like like do you have a plan for
206
that like bringing in solo content um no i don't have
207
a plan i've been doing a lot of solo content like i've been filming just me
208
and my cameraman or super solo like me
209
and like the osmo pocket 3 like solo vlogging
210
which i enjoy both of those as well i just enjoy making youtube videos like i enjoy i enjoy talking
211
so i think on content it's easy too
212
because i just like talking do you feel like you know exactly what your purpose is as a creator
213
or do you feel like you're still finding that you know
214
when I first started making content like I remember the first
215
time I posted an Instagram reel I was like oh this
216
is sick hopefully it motivates other women to go to the gym
217
and now I've built like a really dope following
218
and they're I I love the people that like show love on my videos
219
and everything but it's 90 my audience is 90% men 10% women
220
so it's just funny
221
that in the beginning I was like oh I want to motivate women to go to the gym
222
and then like it's guys that follow me which I love the guys
223
and still like there's no better feeling than
224
when a guy comes up to me
225
and they're like oh you motivated me to go to the gym I'm like that's
226
so sick like that's amazing because that was like my purpose of it now even
227
when someone tells me like oh they watch my videos
228
and like it makes them feel good
229
or it's like a good way to distract themselves like that's such a good feeling
230
yeah no even when I watch your content like it's like you're laughing with it yeah like funny
231
and stuff well thank you I appreciate no
232
that means a lot to me like
233
so I feel like my purpose with it is just to try to make other people feel good
234
or motivate them to go to the gym or anything of
235
that nature is it something that you wanted in terms of like because
236
when I went through a journey of like pivoting yeah i
237
also had a lot of men following me more than women
238
and in order to shift it i had to like lose
239
a lot of followers still losing a lot of male followers
240
but like speaking directly to women is that something
241
that you wanted like want to do
242
or it's kind of like finding the balance between like two
243
i think it's kind of finding the balance between the two even the guys
244
that do follow me i still really appreciate it
245
and it's valuable um i would just love to also you
246
know motivate women to yeah i mean i'm sure you motivate a lot of women yeah
247
when you started obviously you speak a lot about the gym
248
and how it's changed your life could you take me back to like
249
that journey when you started like just going to the gym
250
and why yeah for sure
251
so i weighed like a hundred pounds i struggled with an eating disorder i was
252
so like looking back me me at 21
253
or even 2021 i was a totally different person than i am now
254
but it's funny because
255
when you're 2021 you think like that's your final form you think you know it all
256
and you think like this is who i am
257
but it's like it changed so drastically for me from 21 to like 23
258
but i struggled with an eating disorder i felt so lost with everything like all i would consume
259
in one like one day my meal for a day would be like a McDonald's coke
260
and like a McChicken or whatever
261
and I remember I would tell my mom like oh I'm going to hang out with friends
262
and I would just drive around like listening to sad music
263
like drive around the city like for maybe two hours every night like with my coke
264
and my McDonald's McChicken that's when like I would see your content
265
or like patty's content on like my for you page
266
and i was like oh my god like abs like i want abs
267
or like i want to like feel strong
268
or you know whatever it is so i ended up on like gym tick tock
269
and this was probably like 2021 then i was like oh i want to implement this into my own life and
270
so what did fitness do for you in terms of like
271
mindset fitness like probably like saved my life it made me
272
way more confident it made me i mean i still have like body dysmorphia as most
273
gym goers do
274
but like it made me way more confident made me way
275
happier working out like gave me a sense of purpose do
276
you feel like it only gave you a sense of purpose
277
because it changed your body or more
278
so just like who you are as a person no i
279
feel like it changed me mentally yeah like it changed my body too
280
and i was like stoked on i was like okay i
281
gained like 30 pounds like i feel i feel healthy now
282
like before i would like it's hard for me to find like transformation pictures of
283
when I weighed 100 pounds because I was
284
so skinny I would just like cover like any inch I
285
could with like baggy clothes you know like I'd go I would go to the beach
286
and I'd wear like a swim shirt and like board shorts
287
because like I did not want like anyone to see you know yeah the way I looked
288
because I was like so insecure with my body
289
which still like there's like I said body dysmorphia
290
but um it was way different when I was like skinny the eating disorder that you had
291
what kind of led to like to
292
that point of your life were you going through something like super difficult
293
or not even something super difficult per se like it wasn't
294
one like traumatic instance I think it was more of the feeling of I was in college
295
and I was just stuck in like the same like routine every day
296
and it felt like there was like no sense of purpose like every day just felt like
297
so routine like I felt like I was just like going
298
through the actions of every day to like make it to the next day
299
and just do the same thing that I did the day prior.
300
And this is when you, because I know you used to work at a restaurant.
301
Yeah.
302
So is that when you were like working at a restaurant?
303
Yeah.
304
Were you going to school as well?
305
Yeah, I was going to school.
306
I was working at a restaurant.
307
I would tutor and like babysit like these kids and the kids were great.
308
It was not a diss of the kids, but it just felt like so like mundane.
309
Oh my God.
310
Yes.
311
You grew up in Kentucky.
312
Yeah.
313
And then you moved to, was it, it was one other place that you moved to before LA?
314
Or you moved straight to LA?
315
Yeah, Kentucky to LA.
316
Okay.
317
Yeah.
318
Being raised in Kentucky.
319
Your mom is now in LA though with you?
320
Yeah.
321
Yeah, okay.
322
So being raised there, I guess, how was that like growing up?
323
Yeah, I lived in like a super small town.
324
Like there's two other kids in my class, like grad, like it was the smallest town.
325
I mean, not possible, but it was so small.
326
Like everyone knew each other, but it was nice.
327
I mean, I lived there until I was like 12 and I only have like positive memories from it.
328
Everyone was super sweet.
329
Like Southern hospitality, I feel like is a real thing.
330
But yeah, everyone was super nice.
331
It felt like home.
332
But LA, I feel like there's less of that.
333
People aren't as nice to each other here in LA and it's a big, big city.
334
But the opportunity here is just insane.
335
Like, I love the weather here, and I don't think I'd love L.A if my family wasn't here.
336
So the fact that my family's here makes me love L.A.
337
You know, any place feels like home if your family's there.
338
Is it hard making new friends in L.A.?
339
Or recognizing if someone has, like, pure intentions, especially when you're doing content?
340
I feel like sometimes I might be a little oblivious to it because I never even, like, think about that.
341
I feel like, yeah, I mean, I try not to think about it.
342
I don't usually think about it.
343
But I mean, I have like a few really good friends that I grew up with here.
344
Like I went to high school with and things of that nature.
345
But like making new friends, I've made a bunch of friends through content.
346
But hanging out outside of making content, I don't really hang out with anyone.
347
Like I hang out with my mom outside content.
348
Yeah.
349
Yeah.
350
Like I don't do much like on the day to day.
351
Your mom, was it kind of a situation where you'll both move from Kentucky to LA together?
352
Yeah.
353
So it was me, my mom, my brother.
354
My brother lives here, or he lives in San Diego, so it's like in two and a half hours south of here.
355
But we moved here altogether because my aunt, my mom's sister, lived here, and my grandparents at the time lived here.
356
They both passed away, but my grandparents lived here, so it was just coming to L.A to be surrounded by family.
357
And so you're Iranian, right?
358
Yeah.
359
Full Iranian?
360
Full Iranian.
361
And did your parents, did they meet here, or did they meet in Iran and come over here?
362
They met in Iran.
363
Okay
364
and came over here yeah oh wow yeah do you still
365
feel like you have the iranian culture like with you i feel like in la there's a good sense of
366
that just like middle eastern in general in la it's like there's there's a lot of middle eastern people
367
so that's cool like it's cool to like because in kentucky like
368
if you go to the supermarket
369
or like walmart you don't hear anyone else speaking farsi you're like you'll go out to like eat
370
and you're like you'll hear people speaking farsi
371
which is like kind of cool yeah there's definitely a good
372
sense of culture here okay that's cool i've listened to like
373
content where you would talk about like people would be out
374
and clubbing and stuff and they'd be drinking and offering you a drink
375
but you're always like no i don't drink yeah is that
376
because of like health reasons is it
377
because like did you grow up with like faith
378
so my mom she's muslim she practices like honestly i admire
379
her like she prays five times a day like she's well
380
she's great like she's amazing like after my dad passed away like she never once like you know dated
381
or like got remarried i'm not saying that's the you don't have to go about it
382
that way i'm just saying that's how like she went about it
383
so like i really admire her
384
but for me like it's easy for me to not like it
385
because i didn't grow up with it yeah we never once had alcohol in the house you know yeah
386
so it's so easy for me to turn down
387
because i never really liked it
388
but that's what i'm saying it's like me at 20 21
389
if i was offered a drink like i was like like
390
you know okay like maybe i will you know like maybe
391
i will drink it like everyone else is doing it like why like shouldn't i drink yeah and then that's when
392
like i never liked it i never liked it
393
but i would fold into your pressure i guess of like
394
other people doing it you know like in high school
395
or up after high school but now it's it's
396
so easy like i don't see myself ever drinking again yeah like it's not something
397
that i ever enjoyed but now i'm more confident in myself to say no
398
when those opportunities arise because like that's what i'm saying is like
399
when you go out it's so normalized which is fine like i i'm like
400
if my friends are drinking i'm like hey i'll drive like
401
i'm not bashing anyone for drinking yeah it's just something i'm not gonna do yeah
402
and it's i'm sure you come across people that respect it
403
and then people that are like come on like yes
404
and i'm like but when people are like instigating like come on do it like
405
that turns me off so bad yeah
406
because i'm like i couldn't see myself like
407
if someone was like even saying like oh like i really
408
don't want to go to the gym like i don't want
409
to go i'm not gonna be like come on like you know even
410
that that's like something healthy you know it's a better it's a better
411
but yeah the drinking is like if you already have no negative connotation to it
412
but you're like no what it's what is it going to
413
really yeah for me long yeah like what's the point like i just even my friends like
414
or people i know i i don't think one person they've woken up the next day
415
and be like oh my god thank god i drank last night no like
416
so nobody's ever saying that yeah yeah usually regret it so
417
that is one thing i do try to talk about in
418
content it's like being sober hopefully like to persuade people to be sober not even for religious reasons
419
but like just to enhance your own life i guess yeah
420
because more and more studies are showing like people
421
that are not even practicing faith yeah removing alcohol out of their life yeah is it just i mean
422
if something's damaging your brain and your body
423
that much yeah like it can't be healthy for you
424
and i'm not putting myself on a pedestal like i've done it
425
and i've it's something i really don't like
426
and i'm i just i feel like it has made me a better person
427
and more confident in myself and like able to say no to things
428
so i'm like if other people can learn from
429
that that's cool what was your relationship to islam like growing up
430
because my relationship was completely different to like what it is now yeah i kind of had to like unlearn
431
and relearn in my way you want to learn yeah
432
so growing up it was never really pushed on my brother and i like my mom is super
433
accepting of all religions and cultures
434
and everything like we grew up in kentucky going to catholic
435
school oh wow i went to like a lutheran university for
436
five for all of my schooling like for my undergrad
437
and graduate degree she instilled like morals onto us
438
but not necessarily the religion if
439
that makes sense even though she practices it like out of it's her and like she She has three sisters,
440
but she's the one that like practices it like more so to a T, I guess.
441
Yeah.
442
Um, which I really admire, but I never learned about anything to the point that I guess I practice,
443
you know, like obviously I grew up not eating pork, like still to this day, like I don't eat pork.
444
Yeah.
445
Cause like we never had pork in the house like I don't drink alcohol I don't smoke
446
or you know yeah do you feel like you have your own relationship with God
447
or like a creator in some way it's something
448
that like I've wanted to build
449
and sometimes people have I've heard like people just they have an epiphany with it
450
and I guess I just haven't but I feel like it would make me like a happier person if I did
451
what about you what was what was your like pivotal moment
452
I think this feeling of just emptiness like success gets to
453
a certain point where you have the views the likes it fills no void yeah yeah it doesn't
454
and it just starts to become even louder that like emptiness
455
and I think that I always tried to like fill the void with
456
so many different things like noise people pointless relationships situations
457
that i should have not been doing
458
and it led me to this point where like i feel as
459
if i hit kind of rock bottom and i was searching for some i don't know something deeper
460
but i think it's
461
because i was also in a period of isolation not necessarily
462
like nobody around me it's just like not feeling truly
463
so connected to a person if that makes sense and i think
464
that i had a conversation with my manager
465
and what intrigued me to like islam was he mentioned zakat
466
which is like charity in giving
467
that like in a certain amount of like wealth for example
468
you have to give 2.5 percent yeah it's a percent right yeah
469
so i was spending so much money on like designer things pointless stuff
470
because that kind of gave me like i don't know it filled the void for me yeah
471
and he was like oh you need to start giving
472
because it's just like a blessing in what what you're doing he was muslim yeah
473
but but at the time we weren't both like practicing really
474
so it wasn't like any prayers
475
or anything later on it like started to become more practicing yeah
476
but i don't know connection to something greater than me
477
because i was wondering where all the success was like coming from
478
because it was also so overnight for me in my life like drastically changed yeah
479
and i was just like where are these blessings coming from
480
and i'm a very loyal person like friendships everything i'm like very all in
481
and i think that because i started i always believed
482
in like i was agnostic like belief in something
483
but not following religion and also people ruined religion for me at the time like the culture
484
and everything so it's just like no not for me but
485
when i realized that like zakat was in islam and like charity
486
and giving it kind of like intrigued me to then like dive deeper
487
and also sit with the things that i questioned whether
488
that be like hijab modesty women getting treated less than in the culture
489
and i realized that that wasn't a part of the faith
490
and i think that i was a very curious person
491
so maybe that's kind of where it led from like loneliness
492
to having this belief in something greater than me than to finding kind of islam
493
but also since i grew up with it maybe it's kind of what like i felt
494
because i was kind of predisposition a little bit yeah i was like eid prayer
495
and stuff yes so it was like normal to me a little bit
496
but my mom today's today's oh it was yeah yeah for
497
you do you ever like just question things i question things every day like i question
498
that i think about like religion as a whole
499
or like god every day
500
and then it kind of just i think my issue is like i think about it
501
and then like it becomes a lot to think about
502
because it is a lot you know like the thoughts start slow
503
and then like it starts to pile up
504
and then i'm like okay i'm done thinking about it like
505
it's oh it's overwhelming what are those thoughts feel like overwhelming
506
and like confusing honestly i haven't been through something drastic like losing a loved one
507
and i know you've spoken about like losing your dad and
508
i feel like if i lost a family member and like
509
if i ever experience i mean i guess i will experience it one day right
510
but it's like hopefully not anytime soon no hopefully god forbid but like that feeling of where did they go?
511
Yeah.
512
Did you have that feeling?
513
Yeah.
514
I always think like even recently when I lost my grandparents, I'm like, where are they? But yeah.
515
At six years old, did you feel like that you lost your dad?
516
You know, I feel like I suppressed, and I still do, the feelings.
517
But I just remember growing up, maybe middle school or high school, even even to this day sometimes like maybe less up until this day
518
but like when i see other families like i'm a little envious not not envious
519
but like oh wish that was me you know how do you deal with grief
520
and have you dealt with it i don't know if i've fully dealt with it because like
521
it's okay i still like get emotional
522
i think that's something that it's just is forever going to be emotional since i've never experienced
523
that feeling i don't i don't know what grief feels like
524
i don't know what it feels like to wake up every day
525
and not have that especially from a young age you're dealing with that yeah
526
yeah but i think it like forms you like to the person you are so like
527
at the time if you had to remember like who your dad was is there anything
528
that stayed with you about your dad i feel like i don't remember much
529
but i think i just have this tendency of also like suppressing emotions
530
or like feelings or thoughts but like
531
when my mom speaks about him it's like always to the highest regard
532
so what are some things that he she like says about him like how loving
533
and like caring he was or like how much he like loved my brother
534
and i was your dad like the provider yeah
535
I thought I wouldn't cry.
536
No, it's okay.
537
It's okay.
538
Take a minute.
539
I don't remember the last time I cried.
540
It's okay.
541
If your dad was a provider, how did the family dynamic change?
542
My mom went back to school, actually.
543
and because her schooling was done in iran
544
so like it didn't qualify here or whatever
545
so she went back to school then got her master's
546
and then has been working ever since i've heard you say before
547
that your mom like she had a like y'all had a house
548
and she slept on the couch yeah gave you guys the rooms yeah my mom's like the most selfless person
549
or like it was like a two-car garage and like in high school
550
or after high school when me and my brother both had cars like
551
and she had a car
552
so there's three cars three of us like she would let my brother
553
and I park in the garage like to make sure like we made it like inside the house safely
554
and she would like park on like the outside do you feel like you kind of now
555
that you're in a position where you can maybe like provide
556
for your mom a little bit more do you feel like
557
you owe her like you just want to give back to
558
her oh my god yeah i try to do like anything
559
i can like she's the only person i have on i guess i have a few other people
560
but she's the only she's the first person i had like on payroll
561
or like you know things of that nature so i try to
562
but she's i don't know if like your family's like this my mom is
563
so like stubborn yeah like she will not even to this day like
564
if we go like to costco like it's a fight on who pays or if we go to dinner like
565
I'm like what are you doing mom like I will cover
566
the tab like what are you talking about it's a culture
567
thing I think it's a culture thing like it's it's a
568
fight every time like we're we're like gonna go to Cancun like in two weeks
569
and she wanted like a separate flight or whatever
570
and she was like oh I'll just book it myself I'm
571
like let me book it for you I send her like my card
572
because like I was in a meeting I send her my card I'm like okay
573
if you want to book it like use this
574
and then I check my statements like she didn't use my
575
she didn't use my card I'm like mom like why didn't you use my card does
576
that give you like a sense of drive as well to like keep going
577
because of your mom yeah for sure there's no better feeling than like giving back yeah to her now
578
that you've let out the emotions i guess does grief change the way
579
that you view relationships
580
or connection now no i think it still hurts just as much like even
581
when i lost my grandparents like i was like oh i'll be better at you know handling the grief
582
but i'm really bad at handling grief
583
i think it's because like sometimes maybe i like like i said i suppress the emotion
584
so then like it comes out on a podcast with leander that's why i'm like maybe i need therapy
585
or something like maybe that'll help me yeah handle grief better
586
because i'm not i'm not good with loss
587
and i think maybe that's the same thing as like whenever
588
i talk think about religion i just like it becomes too much
589
so that i'm like i suppress it
590
or i'm like okay time to like do my work to like so i can
591
think like avoidance like maybe i'm avoidant to like thoughts do you think you'll ever not be avoidant i've tried
592
but i'm not um i don't think it's something i can
593
fix myself that's what i'm like yeah maybe therapy you're like
594
honestly you do need therapy i think it will be good
595
because you seem like such a deep thinker though yeah i think i am a deep thinker and then i just
596
end up avoiding or whatever going through all these emotions in terms of like your career
597
and everything does it change the way
598
that you view what success means yes like for
599
so long i think also like growing up like not with
600
a lot of money like i was like oh success means
601
like money like i those things were like totally correlated for me i was like oh like
602
if you have money you're happy
603
and then like I started I'm not even saying like I have a lot of money
604
but I'm saying like then I started making money
605
and I'm like okay this actually sucks like I mean it doesn't suck
606
but like it doesn't make you happy yeah
607
and you thought it would fill a void it does cool
608
things you know like you can travel with people you love
609
or like eat good food and like not think about you know the bill
610
or whatever it is like it feels like like those things are like dope but like for very short amounts of time.
611
So what do you think like true success is?
612
True success I think is being happy and surrounded by people that you love and they love you.
613
Does the happiness come from like your habits?
614
Is it just showing up in general?
615
Do you believe that every day should be happy?
616
No I don't think every day should be happy but I think you got to be like happy with yourself
617
yeah most days like
618
if you're unhappy with yourself like no not every day is
619
going to be happy not every day is going to be good
620
but you know just feeling content and peaceful and loved I guess
621
or like how I would measure success
622
and obviously like I'm not saying having no money there's also
623
like a certain amount of money where like then you don't
624
have to worry about like where your next meal is coming from
625
or like um am I gonna like make rent this month
626
or can I make my car payment like Like there's also like threshold for that too.
627
Like I'm not saying no money at all, but I'm saying money doesn't equate to true happiness.
628
It doesn't equate to.
629
Whenever you're like locked into content, locked into your purpose.
630
I don't know if it's like reading DMs for you also of like seeing people
631
that say like you've changed their lives and stuff.
632
I love the DMs but also if I go to like an event
633
or like a fitness expo or even
634
if I'm like out with my mom like grocery shopping
635
and someone like comes up to me and they're like hey like can we take a picture?
636
Like I love your content like that's way more meaningful to me than like a paycheck.
637
We both work with Gymshark?
638
Yeah.
639
Is that something that you wanted to do from the very beginning of like
640
when you started creating content yeah like i i i don't know
641
if you were there gymshark had a venice event venice california
642
10 year venice were you there no no i wasn't there
643
but i remember it yeah it was before any lift event
644
they had it was like the 10 year oh maybe not
645
then i don't think i've seen it it was i don't
646
know how long they've been around now they've probably been around for 14 years at this point
647
because this was like four years ago it was an event there
648
and i remember like i went and vlogged it
649
and i was like oh like i want to be a gym shark athlete
650
and then like a few months later like i started working
651
with gymshark i remember like i would tutor for 20 bucks an hour
652
which at the time 20 bucks was honestly pretty good
653
and i would spend it all on like gymshark sale like gymshark clearance literally same
654
so yeah so it was like surreal yeah it was it was definitely cool
655
so i'm in this chapter of my career where i'm trying
656
to also get i don't know become a like outside of my shell a little bit
657
when it comes to content creation
658
and like connecting in a different way like showing more of a like your personality
659
and stuff like that is there kind of like a shift in your like brain
660
when the camera's on though yeah i don't think there's really
661
a shift i just like talk to the camera as
662
if like i'm just talking to like my camera guy
663
or like the person whoever's behind the camera like i'm just talking to them
664
but addressing it to everyone that's watching if that makes sense
665
but like when i'm alone i some of those things i just think
666
but i don't say out loud but then
667
when there's a camera i just say it out loud okay
668
that makes sense
669
and you just have one videographer for the past few months i've had one guy okay yeah
670
so i have one guy his name's nick he films
671
and he edits for me we post twice a week okay wow on youtube two videos in one week
672
and your short form content short form content i post like
673
i have a team of clippers who does i post three
674
like youtube shorts three tick tocks three reels okay a day
675
and then like instagram i'll throw up whatever tick tock I'll throw up whatever.
676
Okay. And photos?
677
You're a videographer?
678
Photos.
679
Honestly, it's a lot of iPhone stuff.
680
So whoever I'm with, I'm like, yo, can you snap a picture?
681
Okay.
682
And so now, do you still go to Zoo Culture a lot or do you find different gyms?
683
I love Zoo Culture and I'll go there every once in a while, maybe twice a month or something.
684
But I don't go there every day to train because I just know everyone.
685
So I end up talking.
686
Everyone's filming.
687
So I end up filming.
688
How do you have that piece to yourself?
689
Is fitness still that kind of piece for you anymore?
690
There's definitely been a shift to it
691
because then there's like other standards you need to meet once you make like your hobby or job, I guess.
692
You know, you have to take it more serious in some sense or then like twice a week I'm filming my workout.
693
So those workouts aren't as good.
694
Like the workouts aren't as good
695
because then I end up talking a bunch to the camera so that I'm not like truly locked in on the workout.
696
So then maybe I'll go back at night
697
and like hit a better workout because like the first one like just didn't like scratch my brain the right way.
698
You inspire so many women.
699
Do you have any advice for women that maybe are struggling with,
700
maybe it's judgment or insecurity or perception from other people, treating them differently?
701
So the judgment thing, for me, I mean, it's easier said than done, but I think I've always had a good way of separating it.
702
I always say this, I don't want the negative comments break my day, and I don't want the positive ones make my day.
703
you know
704
so you can't let judgment from other people impact who you
705
are how you show up piece of advice i'd have for
706
women it's just like the outside noise like doesn't matter it
707
really doesn't matter at the end of the day i feel
708
like what matters at the end of the day is like
709
you know the last like hour of the day you know you're alone like
710
or with the people you love that's what matters like how you show up
711
that at that time is is what matters so if you're you know
712
happy with yourself confident in yourself and like secure that's that's what matters
713
so like all of the other like bullshit doesn't really matter
714
because i always say this too like with social media you have
715
so much so many more eyes on you so many more opinions
716
but it'd be the same
717
if you're working a nine to five you're not going to
718
get along with everyone in the workplace you know there's going to be issues there's going to be people
719
that like don't like you or people
720
that like don't care it's just on a bigger scale now
721
i guess have you faced a lot of rejection at times like not necessarily rejection
722
but i get so much i get so many disses on the internet
723
yeah like stuff like that yeah i get
724
so many disses on the internet
725
but like for me again it's just noise it doesn't really unless it's subconsciously doing it
726
but it doesn't really affect me
727
because i know who i am at the end of the
728
day yeah like the comments saying like oh my i get
729
so many comments because like i dress obviously not the best
730
or maybe i look like a little boy sometimes
731
but they're like oh like she's gay and i'm like well i'm not gay
732
so like like how is not not like it's an issue
733
if you are gay
734
but i'm you know like people saying it people saying it it's like dude
735
if you open up my tick tock later
736
and be like just look at the comments like i think on every video there's at least a few
737
but like it's just noise you know like you can't let
738
that stuff affect who you are how you show up do
739
you ever let it affect you sometimes i think i've done a really good job of not
740
but it took years at the beginning it affects you way
741
more you know at the beginning you're getting a bunch of love
742
and then like you'll get a few hate comments
743
and then you'll just like fixate on the hate comments
744
but then as you grow bigger more eyes
745
or you know there's more eyes on you
746
or like more opinions to be had so then there's more hate comments
747
but can't have one without the other just like you said
748
like you can't have like bad days without the good ones
749
and then you won't appreciate the good ones you know that's true
750
and you can never like feed into it that's the thing is also another piece of advice like
751
if you're gonna like do content or even
752
if you're not doing content people are like saying things it's always better to just keep your mouth shut
753
and keep moving yeah
754
so what is your daily routine like i wake up around
755
eight go i'll do like 30 minutes of like lately i
756
don't usually do this the past like two weeks i've been
757
trying to implement this i'll wake up i'll go do cardio for 30 minutes which is huge because I've never done cardio.
758
Like I hate cardio.
759
I'll go walk for 30 minutes.
760
I feel like it's a good way to start my day because I feel I already feel productive.
761
Yeah.
762
Come back home, I usually eat like five, six servings of egg whites, two whole eggs, toast.
763
I can eat the same thing every day.
764
Like I don't get sick of the same thing.
765
And then I'll do some work on my phone, on the computer, and then maybe a protein bar, hit the gym, come back,
766
shower, do some more work by that time my mom's off work
767
so i hang out with her like
768
if we need to go like to the grocery store like anywhere we'll just do it together
769
and then like if there's a basketball game on i'll watch a basketball game
770
or if there's a football game i'll watch a football game and then eat dinner
771
and just doom scroll on my phone maybe throw on a movie go to bed every day
772
but besides the days that you're probably like filming yeah yeah
773
if i'm filming like the second half of the day is usually do the same
774
but like the first half like I'll just film instead of
775
like I don't I maybe not don't do the cardio
776
or like I train train and film at the same time
777
or whatever okay yeah so every single day kind of looks very similar
778
so it's very disciplined though yeah today it's very consistent I don't know
779
if discipline is the right word or
780
if it's just like that's all I gotta do like there's just nothing else
781
if I don't go to the gym like I think about it all day it's kind of like toxic in
782
that aspect like you're fine you're fine to take like a
783
few days off nothing's gonna happen it's probably just like a habit
784
and also the gym does so much for us though mentally probably
785
because once you take one day off and then it's like the next day and then
786
if it's again it messes with you mentally yeah no it
787
does what's your favorite thing to train i think glutes i
788
mean it's such a basic thing dude i hate hitting legs maybe that's what we gotta train
789
if we train together no no we definitely like i hate legs really that's the worst thing ever
790
but you're also really really strong yeah i love insanely strong
791
i love training legs no we have to do a workout
792
do you train till failure mild discomfort okay have you seen um what's it called the gym
793
with unc oh diamond gym yeah yeah diamond gym oh my
794
god you should go no you should go too oh my
795
god we should go together would you ever do something like
796
that diamond gym i don't think i could i'm not gonna
797
lie i think i'm too weak i'd start crying yeah me too
798
if i started crying mid-podcast I'm for sure crying mid-diamond gym safe.
799
What do you think is like next for you in terms of like is there something
800
that you want to do with like fitness I don't know
801
if it's like creating something for women do you feel like that's ever in the books for you?
802
I'm not opposed to it but it's also something
803
that I'm not I'm not gonna lie I don't have any
804
like admirations to like come out with my own product I
805
don't think I have any desire to maybe I just haven't found the right idea
806
that I like really love no as of right now it's
807
like very short term thought process rather than long term would
808
you ever get into acting I'd be down to act yeah
809
that'd be cool I feel like you'd be a good actor you think
810
so yeah I'd be open to that I'd love to do
811
that I've been asked to do like some like reality shows
812
but I would never want to do like a dating reality show
813
that sounds like actually the worst thing I could possibly ever do well
814
if you're trying to shy away of that that it's like yeah
815
but i guess it's like a part of it right i mean it's like do people people know
816
that it's jokes right i don't know sometimes i don't know
817
i feel like people perceive it how they want to perceive
818
it honestly do you not ever i guess like in those situations like with like filming content
819
and stuff do you ever catch feelings no really no
820
because it's kind of like a hat like it's a hat
821
you wear it's like yeah content it's just jokes for me and it's the same jokes I'd be making off camera.
822
Some of them are like a little bit more exaggerated I guess
823
but no I don't catch feelings
824
and most of the people I film with like they also know
825
and I know like going into it it's just it's strictly
826
for a YouTube video like they have their own like some
827
of the people I film with have like their own like girlfriends
828
and relationships that they have outside of that like it's strictly like oh this will bang on YouTube.
829
Okay so there is a A reoccurring question that I ask all my guests.
830
Yes.
831
What does it mean to be human?
832
Wow, that's like, at first I was like, oh, that's easy.
833
But that's a really deep question.
834
What does it mean to be human?
835
I mean, it means you make mistakes.
836
It means you have to show up the best you can every day for the people you love.
837
You got to put yourself first sometimes.
838
You have to be empathetic.
839
you have to be open-minded to everyone regardless of like who they are like their background
840
or their beliefs you have to feel things
841
and try to like resonate with other people and like hear their perspective
842
or just not be closed-minded in a sense and yeah thank you
843
so much sarah for coming on thank you for having me
844
on it was honestly like this was a full circle moment for me
845
because i literally love you and i love your content oh i love you too thank you
📺 Same Channel
B21
deen vs dunya - how to detach from this world
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
Self-Sabotage, Self-Forgiveness & Why the Way You Talk to Yourself Is Everything
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B11
Why I don’t believe in Male Friendships
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
How to Journal: 4 Ways to Journal for Growth, Clarity & Becoming Your Best Self
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
How to Stop Scrolling, Overcome Procrastination & Build Self-Discipline
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B11
Loneliness comes from not working on your purpose.
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B24
if they don’t respect boundaries, then 🚩
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
The Truth On Modesty, Feminism, and Oppression
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B25
Lean Beef Patty on Learning to Be Yourself Without Everyone’s Approval
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
The Habits That Made Me More Disciplined
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B11
the night routine that changed my life
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B22
Why God Makes Us Wait for Love
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B2The Lonely Chapter: Letting Go of Pressure, Finding Your Purpose
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
✨ Recommend Video
B25
32 sentences
Brené Brown on Empathy vs Sympathy
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
128 sentences
Selena Gomez on Her Makeup Empire, Why She Took a Step Back From Music & Life with Benny Blanco
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
423 sentences
Romanticize your life
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
416 sentences
This Is All About You With Dr Shauna Watts
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B2740 sentences
Serenity Cox Goes Deeper Than Ever | Full Podcast Interview
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B22
431 sentences
Making space for everyone in the classroom with Sarah-Ann Elizabeth Brown
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B11
604 sentences
things that are elevating my life | Episode 48
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B11
365 sentences
Learn to Find Your Purpose | English Learning Podcast for Easy Conversation | Daily Life English
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B26
170 sentences
can i tell you something? | getting in my own way, inner thoughts, chit chat
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B26
762 sentences
If You Care Too Much About What People Think, Watch This | Kendall Jenner
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B22
138 sentences
Oprah on Faith, Purpose, and Becoming Who You're Meant to Be
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This video has 845 sentences and 9700 words to shadow. The speech runs for 45:57. The speaker talks fast, about 211 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 85% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| fitness noun | /ˈfɪt.nəs/ | The condition of being fit, suitable or appropriate. |
| creator noun | /kɹiːˈeɪ̯təː/ | Something or someone which creates or makes something. |
| grief noun | /ɡɹiːf/ | Suffering, hardship. |
| workout noun | /ˈwɝk.aʊ̯t/ | An exercise session; a period of physical exercise. |
| insecure adjective | /ɪnsəˈkjʊɹ/ | Not secure. |
| motivate verb | /ˈmoʊ.tɪ.veɪt/ | To provide someone with an incentive to do something; to encourage; to actuate. |
| diamond noun | /ˈdaɪ.ə.mənd/ | A glimmering glass-like mineral that is an allotrope of carbon in which each atom is surrounded by four others in the form of a tetrahedron. |
| disorder noun | /dɪsˈɔɹdɚ/ | Absence of order; state of not being arranged in an orderly manner. |
| emotion noun | /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/ | A person's internal state of being and involuntary physiological response to an object or a situation, based on or tied to physical state and sensory data. |
| uncomfortable adjective | /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/ | Not comfortable; causing discomfort. |
| podcast noun | /ˈpɑdˌkæst/ | A program, especially an audio program, produced on a regular basis, delivered over the Internet in a compressed digital format and designed for playback on… |
| void adjective | /vɔɪd/ | Containing nothing; empty; not occupied or filled. |
| consistency noun | /kənˈsɪs.tən.si/ | Local coherence. |
| admire verb | /ədˈmaɪɹ/ | To regard with wonder and delight. |
| tick noun | /tɪk/ | A tiny woodland arachnid of the suborder Ixodida. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| end up verb | To bring to a conclusion. | |
| grow up verb | To mature and become an adult. | |
| go through verb | To travel from one end of something to the other. | |
| show up verb | To appear, arrive, or attend, especially suddenly or erratically. | |
| wake up verb | /ˌweɪk ˈʌp/ | To stop sleeping; to awake. |
| come up to verb | To approach. | |
| throw up verb | To vomit. | |
| work out verb | /ˌwɝk ˈaʊt/ | To calculate. |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 363 contractions and reduced forms, such as I'm, don't, you're. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: athlete /ˈæθ.liːt/, altogether /ɔl.tuˈɡɛð.ɚ/, threshold /ˈθɹɛʃ(h)oʊld/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, garage /ɡəˈɹɑʒ/, rejection /ɹɪˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/, essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, shell /ʃɛl/
- Long words — get the stress right: uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/, consistency /kənˈsɪs.tən.si/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, differently /ˈdɪf.ə.ɹənt.li/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like fitness, creator, grief.
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | I've been journaling · I've been enjoying · i've been doing |
| Conditional sentences if + clause, will/would + verb — a condition and its result | if I'm filming with Patti, I'll be · if there's a basketball game on i'll watch · if there's a football game i'll watch |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | has been · i've said · haven't posted |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | are never planned · was showed · was just stuck |
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.