Shadowing Practice: watch this if you feel like a failure - Learn English Speaking with Video

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Why does it seem like everyone's getting richer, skinnier, better than me?
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Why does it seem like everything's going wrong and every time I think it's going right, something bad happens?
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Like, I guess I just can't catch a break.
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If you're watching this, you might feel the same way.
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You thought you'd be further along by now, that you'd have more money, more experience, more friends, but you have none of that, and it actually feels like you're going backwards.
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You hate when people tell you to look on the bright side or think positively or don't worry, your time will come but little do they know it's been weeks,
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months, years, and you're still waiting just to feel slightly successful.
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I'm going to tell you something you probably don't want to hear, but it is the one thing that has helped me more than anything else.
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It is the manifesto I live my life by, and that's radical acceptance.
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We say that everything in our life is bad, but is it really?
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Why is it bad?
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Who told you it was bad?
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We judge and label every single experience as either good or bad.
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It's just human nature.
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Everything needs to be categorized in our brain by emotion.
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The summer before college, good.
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My 16th birthday party, bad.
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But these are superficial labels because nothing in this world is good or bad.
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It just is.
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When I see the world this way, I've become less attached to it and more at peace.
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I've just stopped letting things that happen to me tell me who I am.
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We get emotionally triggered by situations because our brain automatically labels it as negative
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or we instantly dislike someone because we don't see them as a good person.
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But the hard truth I've had to learn is that I'm no better than them.
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I've made people cry before.
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I've raised my voice.
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I've made a lot of mistakes.
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But I don't label myself as good or bad.
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I just am.
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We all have positive and negative traits, but we can't fully say we're one or the other.
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So we also don't need to associate things as being positive
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or negative because then our mind creates expectations for how to feel in situations that haven't even happened yet.
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When I got my internship my junior year of college, I was so happy, I couldn't believe it.
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But when I actually started the job, it did not live up to what I thought it was gonna be.
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It actually kind of sucked.
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And then I became depressed because what I thought was gonna be so great wasn't actually anymore.
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These judgments drive how we think.
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How we think dictates how we feel and how we feel motivates how we act.
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But I give you permission to let go of these good and bad judgments.
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We don't need to keep labeling ourselves and other people.
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And your failures, they are what they are.
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Is it really a failure if it was also an experience?
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How can you have a failed experience?
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You can't.
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Because the experience did exactly what it was supposed to.
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You experienced it.
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It made you learn.
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And that will never be taken away from you.
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It is at the center of the human experience.
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We live to do.
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And to do is to experience all of what life has to offer, both good and bad.
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It's actually quite wonderful that we can even remember all of our experiences
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and take away all of the lessons from them so that we can evolve into better people.
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Now that I think about it, I've never wished that I didn't learn from an experience.
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It is the only thing with a guaranteed positive outcome.
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In order to change the way I react, I need to change my thoughts.
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We go through life believing every thought we have, that we're not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough.
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These thoughts tell us we're behind and we actually believe them.
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But once I started going to therapy, I could become aware of the thoughts I couldn't hear before.
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And once I could hear them, I could silence them.
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That's one of the reasons I'm so grateful to be partnering with BetterHelp, the sponsor of today's video.
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BetterHelp has made it incredibly easy to get therapy online with licensed professionals from the comfort of your own home.
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If you've been feeling stuck, behind, or unworthy, therapy can be a valuable tool for working through these thoughts.
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And if the therapist you're matched with isn't the right fit, you can switch to a different one at no extra cost and no hard feelings.
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If you'd like to learn more, you can go to betterhelp.com slash Alison Beck and get 10% off your first month of therapy.
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But radical acceptance isn't just about accepting what's happening to you right now.
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It's also about accepting everything that's happened to you in the past.
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A lot of us say we want peace, but we're still fighting old wars.
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We're still arguing with things that happened five years ago, 15 years ago.
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We replay conversations in our head.
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We think about the people who hurt us.
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We think about the opportunities we lost, the mistakes we made and without realizing it, we spend years wishing reality was different.
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But it's not.
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There's nothing you can do to change your experiences.
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You can only change how you perceive them now.
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And the more we resist these truths, the more power they continue to have over us.
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We let our past dictate our future, our careers, our relationships.
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We let it creep into our thoughts that tell us over and over again why we're not good enough.
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Learning radical acceptance does not mean you have to approve of your past.
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It doesn't mean what happened to you was okay or that your trauma was fair.
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It doesn't mean your heartbreak was deserved or that you have to continue putting energy into things that don't benefit you.
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But whether we decide to accept or not, our past will remain unchanged.
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For a long time, I thought that healing meant figuring out how to erase painful experiences from my life.
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But it's not about erasing anything or pretending like it doesn't exist.
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It's about learning to look at it and say, I accept it and I can move on.
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I know you're going through a hard time right now.
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I know you must feel so ashamed.
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But every failure and experience you perceive is a gift.
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You become wiser, stronger, more clear.
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And I can genuinely say that every failure has taught me what I needed the most.
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So in this moment, if you feel like a failure, you don't need to force yourself to be happy.
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You don't need to pretend that everything's going your way, but you've never lost your power.
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And you have the control to stop letting these things mean something about who you are.
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Being single doesn't mean you're unlovable.
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Not having money doesn't mean you're unsuccessful.
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Being rejected doesn't mean you're unwanted.
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You are not your experiences.
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Nothing is good or bad.
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It just is.
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And you just are.

Context & Background

The video titled "watch this if you feel like a failure" addresses common feelings of inadequacy that many individuals encounter in their lives. The speaker acknowledges the pressures of societal expectations and the emotional turmoil that can arise when we feel we're not measuring up to our peers. Through the lens of personal experience, the speaker offers insights on embracing radical acceptance, promoting a sense of peace, and recognizing the value of our failures as part of the human experience. Such discussions are pivotal for English learners who want to not only improve their language skills but also engage with meaningful content that resonates on a personal level.

Top 5 Phrases for Daily Communication

  • “I guess I just can't catch a break.” – This phrase expresses frustration over ongoing difficulties.
  • “Why does it seem like everything's going wrong?” – A rhetorical question that highlights a feeling of helplessness.
  • “I’ve just stopped letting things that happen to me tell me who I am.” – A powerful statement about self-identity and acceptance.
  • “How can you have a failed experience?” – This phrase challenges the traditional notion of failure.
  • “It's just human nature.” – A reminder that feelings of judgment and labeling are common to all.

Step-by-step Shadowing Guide

To effectively use this video for shadowspeak, follow these steps:

  1. Familiarize Yourself with the Content: Begin by watching the video once without any interruptions. Focus on the speaker’s tone, pace, and pronunciation.
  2. Break It Down: Divide the video into smaller segments (around 1-2 minutes each) to make the material manageable. This allows you to concentrate on the context and emotions conveyed in each excerpt.
  3. Repeat and Imitate: Play a segment, pause it, and then repeat what the speaker says. Try to mimic their intonation, stress, and rhythm. This is crucial for improving English pronunciation and mastering shadow speech.
  4. Record Yourself: Use your phone to record your shadow speaking. Afterwards, listen to your pronunciation compared to the original speaker. Note any differences and areas for improvement.
  5. Reflect on the Content: After practicing, think about the messages conveyed in the video. How do they resonate with your own experiences? Engaging with the material deeply enriches language acquisition and contextual understanding.

By following this structured approach, you’ll improve your speaking skills while gaining valuable insights into emotional resilience and acceptance, all while utilizing effective shadowspeaks techniques to enhance your English language journey.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.