Shadowing Practice: Why Being 'Behind' in your 20s is Brilliant. - Learn English Speaking with Video

Hi, I'm Alex and welcome back to my podcast.

Today I want to talk about being behind in your 20s

because this is an idea that I see a lot online

that a lot of people seem really hung up on

and really upset about and I think it makes a lot of sense.

However, I have been behind in my 20s for a long time.

I've definitely had a lot of my life marked by the external pressure

that seems to make a lot of people feel like they are really letting someone down

because of and i have let a lot of people down with my life choices

and i want to talk about why i think it's actually a brilliant thing

and i'm really really happy to be and

because of being behind in my 20s i feel like i

see a lot of people talk about how awfully plagued they feel by the idea

that they are this failure because they aren't i don't know on this certain path

and they haven't reached these milestones especially when they're surrounded by people who have

and i feel like that is definitely one way to approach it

and to view it but personally I think it has been a blessing to be behind

and figure out my own path and find my own way of figuring things out.

So I want to start off by talking about my credentials right

because it's one thing if I'm like oh I'm so behind

but it's fine because I have really rich parents

that will bail me out if anything goes wrong

and I don't have to worry about like achieving anything in life

and I feel like I've been unconditionally loved my whole life

so I've never really dealt with this feeling of like i need to prove myself

that i'm worthy of love because my parents loved me unconditionally i don't have those things

and so i'm going to give my credentials to prove

that i am someone who really has felt a lot of pressure

and felt like a failure because of the choices that i've made

or because of the fact

that i like didn't follow the traditional path um i am part chinese

so let that speak for itself however also on my polish side not

that i felt pressure because i think i was good at not internalizing it

but i definitely see how i could have because my cousin love of my life my sweetie.

I love my cousin so much.

She is only, I think, three years older than me.

I don't actually know how old she is.

And she is like the cleverest clogs.

She was doing a law PhD.

She ended up not finishing the PhD because she got married and has a child, a beautiful, beautiful child.

And she moved out at a very young age.

She just really is like absolutely the kind of child that you should be really proud of in a traditional sense.

I think then my family, especially because like similarly to me, my cousin was very academically gifted.

She was doing really well in school we both had a lot of parallels in the routes

that we were taking when we were young

and then i just like hopped off the train

and like dropped out of uni to start modeling

and la la la and i think that like for my grandparents

and like a lot of family members having

that direct parallel of like oh you really could have not done

that like you really could have stuck with it

and done something a lot more admirable i didn't take it in as pressure

and that's something i'll talk about later because i just like didn't deep it

and i didn't really care

but i did have quite a lot of phone calls like

you're ruining your life you're ruining your life In regards to school and my environment in that sense, I went to quite an underfunded and underprivileged state school when I first moved to the UK.

But then for sixth form, I went to a grammar school.

And this sounds really cocky, but I think this is like actually the term for it.

I went to a super selective grammar school.

So the ones that take like the top schools from like a big area.

And like obviously there, there is a bit of pressure to do well.

I didn't really feel that pressure because I didn't go into school.

But this is again, this is like where my flop era begins.

A little bit more context that I think is quite necessary

and definitely like will illuminate certain things about why I've chosen the path that I have.

I have some elusive health issues that I've like made a point to not talk about online.

But then obviously it's difficult when I'm talking about like my childhood, certain problems I had growing up, certain like decisions I made.

Because my health issues were probably like the most, like the biggest factor my whole life.

Especially when they were a lot more active, like I'm a lot better now.

That's why I don't really feel the need to talk about them

because it's something that I like to keep private

but also it's something that like doesn't really flare up as often

and it's very easy for me to just like avoid talking about it online.

But when I was young, it was flaring up constantly.

I was really, really unwell.

And so because of that, I already kind of was like, oof, I don't know

if I'm going to be able to stick to the same kind of path as everyone else because I'm really unwell.

And it definitely got a lot worse in sixth form.

I was barely going into school.

And I think another thing, and a lot of people who have dealt with health issues

or just like difficult life circumstances or mental health issues will relate to this quite a lot.

I think for me, and this was kind of the start of where I suspected as a child

that I probably wasn't going to be this like Chinese doctor prodigy

that is like super rich and like capitalist and wins at capitalism.

I had a suspicion that wouldn't happen

because I really struggled planning for the future because I struggled imagining there being a future for me.

Especially because of my health, I was really depressed and I just couldn't imagine a future in

which I can't even say like a future in which A

or B or C or whatever would happen

because I just couldn't imagine my future

and I remember like I don't believe in God

and I didn't I haven't believed in God for a long time

when I was little I was like maybe a bit Christian

but like by little I mean like very very young right

the vibe was very like oh my dad's a buddhist

and my mom's a christian so I'm half buddhist

and I'm half christian because I viewed it as like some little like nationality despite

that I remember feeling this sort of almost like packed with

the greater forces in regards to me being quite academically gifted I remember thinking of it as like, okay, well, I have to spend so much time going to doctors,

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going to appointments, also like being unwell and like really struggling and being so depressed.

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It's only fair that I'm also doing so well in school because I don't have the time to study.

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I don't have the time to look at unis.

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I don't have, I'm not even the time, but I don't even have the emotional room.

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I remember feeling this like gratitude towards the universe.

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That's like, okay, you cursed me with all these horrors, but at least you've not left any doors closed for me because, you know, unfortunately it is really hard.

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And I've definitely seen this with a lot of my friends who dropped out of sixth form, who did not get very good A-levels.

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Now they're like, oh, so many doors are closed for me.

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And I feel very lucky because I got very good A-level grades and so doors aren't closed for me.

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But I remember viewing that as almost like a law of averages.

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Like, okay, I've had to deal with all this craziness, but at least nothing is closed.

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And like, if I were to one day get better, I will be able to take any choice or route I would like to.

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And that has been the case.

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I've been very lucky.

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And I've chosen, I've chosen to be behind in my twenties and be a flop.

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And that is what I want to go into, that I truly am so happy with that decision to not do the impressive societally highly regarded path.

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I'd say the beginning of the end for me was in sixth form

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when I just stopped going to school I like did not go in

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and also I just like stopped I think like school was easy in a way

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because they would just tell you what to do

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and you'd have to do it you just go in

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and you'd have to sit exams and then they'd be done and obviously

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that that's a lot easier than for other people who have to really like prepare for the exams

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and study and stuff but for me it was very like just tell me what to do

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and I'll be there

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and then it got to applying to universities I talk a lot about the fact

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that I took a gap year that was not entirely by choice

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that was because I just forgot to apply to UCAS I didn't realize

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that that was happening and it was weird

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because all my friends were talking about like oh i'm

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so stressed about my personal statement oh i'm

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so stressed i don't know what you need to choose

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and i was just like yeah yeah whatever i'll get around to it eventually

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and by the time i was like okay let's log into ucas

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and let's see what this fuss is about right i was

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like oh applications are closed i missed it like i missed

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my chance i have to take a gap year now so

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that was definitely a like eyebrow raising moment where i was

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like oh wait i'm not cut out for this i am

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not self-motivated at all i don't understand why everyone's getting this information realistically they were probably getting out of school

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which i wasn't going to so that's why i didn't know that like i was so behind and stuff.

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I then did go to uni after a gap year.

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I went to Bristol.

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I got in for psychology, but I ended up switching to philosophy last minute.

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And that was again also another moment where I was like, hmm, I was really flip floppy about which degree I wanted to do.

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I got in for psychology and I was like, okay, I want to study psychology.

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I'm going to become a developmental psychologist.

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This will be great.

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I want to like, you know, really go into research and stuff like that.

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And then I was like, no, I don't want to actually, I want to do something else.

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And then I was like, oh, actually, I don't know what I want to do.

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I have no idea what I want to do.

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And I'm really, really stressed about having to pick one thing

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and like be cemented in that choice so I switched to philosophy last minute

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which is like very funny that I chose that

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because this isn't to hate not to suggest

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that like all philosophy graduates are like unemployed or anything like

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that but like I feel like arguably

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if my stress was like I don't know what I'm going

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to do with my life I feel like choosing philosophy obviously it like has a lot of doors open

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but it also I was saying I really benefit from being

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just kind of like told what to do I was not being told what to do

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when studying philosophy I think that's much more open than something

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like psychology where you have quite a like semi clear career trajectory, right?

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But something quite traumatizing happened to me, like within the first few months of me being at uni.

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And I tried to make it work, but I was like, I actually can't, like I really need some time off to process what has happened.

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And so I was kind of forced to step off the route.

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And that is something that happens to a lot of people as well.

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Where like, okay, before it was very much like my decisions that led like, for example, my choosing, and obviously not choosing, cause I was really unwell,

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but my choosing to not come into school is what led me to not applying to UCAS and stuff like that.

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But what was so frustrating about the uni thing was that I'd actually like, my health had improved massively.

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I was really well when I went to uni.

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I'd say that was when my health problems stopped being so persistent and like pervasive to like every aspect of my life.

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And then suddenly it's like, okay, I'm doing good.

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I'm pushing myself, I'm going to my lectures, I'm getting good grades.

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And then something against my will has caused me to freak out and not be able to do this.

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And I think that happens a lot to people as well, where it's like, things will be going well and you will be on the right path.

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And then suddenly something external that like you couldn't predict will happen.

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And suddenly you're like, fuck, this is so unfair.

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This is so unfair.

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This shouldn't have happened.

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This is where I think then the crux of my like, why I feel so good that I'm behind is like the most seen, the most visible, I guess.

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This is the moment that I think had like the largest dichotomy or like split in how people reacted to that.

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I didn't tell most people what happened at uni.

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Like still very few people know why I dropped out.

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So I just vaguely said to my family, like something happened and I just can't go in anymore.

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And it was very interesting seeing their response versus my internal response.

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Their response to the fact that I was no longer at university was very much like calling me, telling me I've made this horrible mistake.

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And what are my plans now?

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When am I going to go back to uni?

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Am I going to go back next year?

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When am I reapplying?

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When am I going back?

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What am I doing?

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This is so bad.

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What job am I going to get?

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What am I going to do with my life?

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And it was this very like, not like, hey, what are you going to do with your life?

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There was this expectation behind this.

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There was this pressure.

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But within myself, I think, as much as like it was horrible, none of that stuff should have happened to me.

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It gave me a chance to really be like, oh, I've fallen off the wheel now.

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What do I want from my life?

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Because I now it would be quite hard for me to get back up and be like, okay I'm going to go back to university and study something Admirable.

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I don't know if admirable is the word I'm gonna study something impressive like my cousin did

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and I'm going to really smash it out and I'm going to be

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so mentally well and my health is gonna be perfect

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and I'm gonna be able to make all this money So instead I got to be like, okay Well, I've been told my whole life what is impressive

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and what you should be striving towards and what are like these metrics of success that I'm supposed to be working towards.

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But this has not worked out for me.

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What do I want?

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I get that obviously it's difficult because people will be putting pressure on you.

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You will feel external pressure and it is easy, especially at the moment, I wanna add, with like the cost of living crisis.

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And like, for example, me and my family, like we're immigrants and I recognize that like, I can't just kick back and relax entirely.

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I kind of do need to get a grip and I do need to save for a lot of important things.

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Currently i'm saving to get my citizenship i'm trying to kind of build something um

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and now it's like i think at the moment where like times are so uncertain

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and i think especially like to people who are coming from

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like underprivileged backgrounds i obviously mean this with some nuance

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but like i've definitely felt this like with my family

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and i was talking to like my siblings about this how

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like now isn't entirely the time where we can just kick back

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and relax and be like oh la la like whatever will come will come

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because times are really uncertain and things are really scary at at the moment.

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I feel like I need to buckle up a bit, especially like in my position, I need to buckle up.

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And I think a lot of people will relate to that where it's like, now's not the time to faff about too much.

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But that being said, I think that there is some leeway.

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And I think for me, being behind has allowed me to faff about a bit and to really reflect on what do I want from my life?

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What things do I prioritize in my life?

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Like, what are the like most important things that I want from my life?

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And also, who am I?

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Who am I?

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And I also talk on here about how like, oh, there is no real yourself we are all just constant change

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but beyond all that like that's a bit more deep level

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bringing it up a bit just on the surface i alex

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what do i want my life to look like what do

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i love what do i like what kind of job do i want what kind of routine works for me

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because if i just like for example i've no studied philosophy

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and then gone into law and something like

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that i probably would be working loads of hours

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which i know now that like working a lot really flares up my health problems

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so as long as i can afford it

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and as long as like i am able to i would ideally like to work slightly less and also less intensity.

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Obviously if I have to, I have to, but just because of my health and stuff, I try with it if I can.

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I'd probably be working a job that is very, very high intensity.

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I probably would also be working a job that I don't entirely believe in.

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That is something that, again, I'm very privileged to be like, oh, I really only want to work in something that I feel very like personally called to and I believe in.

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That's not always a privilege I'm going to have, and that is definitely not a privilege I had before with like the kind of crazy jobs

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that I was doing before when I was working like 60 hours in like a fast food restaurant.

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If I have to do something like that, I will have to, but I've been able to reflect on what I actually want from my life.

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I've also, because I, you know, in like all my gap years and like dropping out and stuff, I've had to work a lot.

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I've not really ever had a time of unemployment.

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And through that, I've gotten to learn what kind of job I want, what kind of things I like to do.

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As much as I shit on like working at the fast food place, I also had to work as a barista for ages.

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I loved it.

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I loved it.

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I still actually kind of miss working as a barista, even though that is like kind of low and like I guess considered like a low skill job.

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I loved it and I really really miss it

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and I've been able to kind of reflect on what things I like from a job

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but also I've been able to reflect on who I am outside of academia and outside of work.

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I think especially because for so long it was easy to feel good about myself because I was getting good grades.

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Like this is why I talk quite frankly about the fact

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that I was academically gifted because now I don't think that's anything impressive

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and I get

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that like before it was easy for me to not have to actually learn to be confident within myself

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and love myself unconditionally especially because I'd not been taught how to love myself unconditionally

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because I always had academic validation and because of

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that it was very easy to be like I'm confident

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because I'm being constantly validated that like I'm good enough

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but then when suddenly I wasn't able to anymore

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because suddenly I was not able to go into uni anymore I had to dig deep

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and start from scratch well what actually do I love about myself

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and I realized like grades are so ridiculous there is nothing impressive about the fact

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that I just like naturally get on with maths a little bit, you know?

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Like it's fun and it's great and it's worked out really well for me.

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It's been like a huge privilege but it's just a privilege.

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I don't think it's really a reason for me to be proud of myself.

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Actually, I'm proud of myself because I've grown so much as a person

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and I have developed a really deep empathy for people

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that I didn't really have before and I have learned

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so much about what I want from life

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and I've started to really put in the work to try and make my life look that way.

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Those are things that I'm proud of about myself

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but before I had the chance to kind of you know fall off the rat race

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and like really reflect on these things I not so consciously

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but I think on a deep level I didn't have to reflect on

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that because I was like oh well I'm told I'm good

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and I'm kind of like told I'm worthy

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because I get good grades you know and it's like oh

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because I got to my top choice uni and oh

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because I like blah blah blah and I think probably

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if I had studied a more impressive course I could use

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that as well as a shield of like look but I'm good

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but I'm good but no like who actually am I like beneath

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that especially because that isn't something impressive like yeah often

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that is linked to some level of privilege

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and i don't even mean just like for example going to elite universities

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because you have contacts i don't even mean

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that i just mean like i didn't make myself good at

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school i'm just good at school who cares like literally who cares

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that is not something that is inherently impressive it is impressive

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that i had horrific depression because of health issues

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and then i learned to like love life so deeply again like

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that is something that's impressive and i only really got to touch

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that because of the fact

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that i went on this unconventional route where i wasn't able to hide behind the fact

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that I was like reaching these societally impressive milestones.

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Part of that is also privilege

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because as much as I'm saying like my extended family were kind of a bit weird about it, my mum wasn't.

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I think that is also largely from seeing me so unwell for so much of my life.

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She said for her all she cared about was my health

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and I'm really really lucky because obviously some parents are not like that.

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She just wanted me to be healthy and happy so when I dropped out and I was like I can't go in, like I literally can't go in, she was like okay that's fine.

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Unfortunately, I don't have like a middle class like safety blank or anything.

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She was like, if you're living with me You do have to go to work

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But beyond that like she just trusted

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that in my own time I would figure out what is best for myself

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And I did because I had that time and I also had

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that like space within myself to reflect on what it was

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that was important to me And I think it's been

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so wonderful Obviously at the moment like I know

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that I'm in a job now like being like a youtuber

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and a tiktoker or whatever that some people do find Impressive but this is like a bit later down the line.

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There was a while where I was really just like, yeah, like I said, I was a barista.

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I was working like a fast food place, which has also been really good.

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I think it's like prepared me for this job

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because sometimes I do get people that I like know in real life who seem

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so really impressed by this and I don't think it's impressive.

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And that's good.

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For me, that is something I prioritise.

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I want to be humble.

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And I think being forced to be humble because suddenly I went from like, oh, she's so clever and she goes to a grammar school and she

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like doesn't even have to revise for exams

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and then it was like oh I can't go to uni

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and I'm not going to school

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and I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life

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and I have no idea what I'm gonna do

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and I don't know what job I'm gonna do

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and I'm totally lost and there is no constant stream of validation

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and I don't know what is happening and I think

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that was really good I needed that I needed to be humbled

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so basically because this is now like a bit of a ramble I think

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that being behind in your 20s is such a gift

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because you get to stop and reflect on what it is that you define as success, what it is that you define as important.

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And I think a lot of people don't get to do

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that and they end up having these crazy midlife crises and hopefully we will be able to avoid that.

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Time is so short.

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I think this is something I think about in regards to like the rat race

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and the conventional kind of like go to an amazing uni, get an amazing job, make loads of money.

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I think

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that a lot of these roots it's almost like at what

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point do we like factor in being human you know a lot of these kinds of like milestones

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and stuff i feel like there's almost this assumption

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that we're gonna live forever and that we have

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so much time to figure out who we are and we have

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so much time to figure out what we want and

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so much time to then based off of what we figured out to live

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that life when we don't our life is

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so short like we are actually going to die very very soon like i'm glad

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that i've gotten to really dive into

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that truth of like i am going to die

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so soon what are the things that I prioritize

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and they might not work out right I'm obviously very lucky to live in England

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and stuff like that but you know I'm not from the most privileged background for example

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when I was working those crazy hours I recognized

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that like this is not ideal

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but I have to do this like I have to make ends meet

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and same with like a lot of work

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that like the people around me

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and like my family have had to do it's like you

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just have to do what you have to do sometimes but beyond

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that where I am able to what do I want my

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life to look like what does success mean to me

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and I feel like I'm talking in circles of it

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but I am so beyond glad I've had that time

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because what I realized was was

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that my definition of success is actually very like antithetical to the idea of success

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that I had been fed my whole life.

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Thank god I found that out.

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Thank god.

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Imagine if instead I had like finished my uni degree

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and then gone into law and then become an impressive lawyer and spent all this time.

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Maybe I would be happy.

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That's another thing.

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I don't want to shit on people who do take that route.

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But my point is that a lot of people don't get to reflect on whether they want that route.

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Because maybe I would have stopped and reflected.

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For example, my cousin, she seems really happy with the route that she's taken.

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And that's beautiful.

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I'm so happy for her.

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But I've realized, oh damn, I don't think I would have been happy at all.

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And I'm so glad that I got to reflect on that when I did.

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And now I'm so happy.

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I'm so freaking happy.

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I love the life that I've built for myself.

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I'm obviously very lucky to have this job.

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This job fits so many of my like health-based checklists of like things that I need.

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The job's very flexible.

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It's not like a crazy, like it is a full-time job, but it's not a crazy amount of hours.

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I get to talk about things that I love and share things that I love.

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I also get a lot of very human feedback.

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Like sometimes I get comments about how I've really like helped someone to feel better within themselves

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Or I've really helped someone to reflect on what they love

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or I've helped someone with something And I think for me

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that like literally like gives me such a drive that like yes, thank god I'm doing something of some substance and it makes me really really happy Yeah, if I wasn't doing this I just have to figure something else out

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But at least I know what it is that I love

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and also I feel like I love myself so much better

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because of the fact that I have not been able to rely on Wow, I'm on the right path

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because I'm really not on the conventionally right path maybe a bit now

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that i'm doing this job

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but before doing this not at all like like really my family was not happy

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but i'm so happy if you're like in your 20s

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and you're like oh my god i'm

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so behind like i uh you know i'm totally not where

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i want to be i did not end up going down the career path

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that i thought i would i don't have nearly as much

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saved as i would have liked i am not at all in the relationship

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that i would like to be obviously that is stressful

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and obviously like i said

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that external pressure like it does get to you it is difficult

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but what a blessing that like you get to reflect on what it is that you like.

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Why don't you like it?

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Why aren't you happy?

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What about your life do you want to change?

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And because you're behind, fuck it, you can change it, you know, once you're already behind, okay, well, what do you wanna change around?

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What do you wanna change about your life?

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Cause you can do it, like, and why not?

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Because your life is so short.

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Your life is so short.

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Why wait for your life to magically become better when you can make it better now?

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Obviously within reason, if you have the means to.

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I've been rambling and talking in circles.

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So just to kind of like hammer in the point I'm making, I think the fact that I have fallen behind by some people's definition of what it means to be successful.

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I have ended up discovering for myself what it is

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that I as a human being find important

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and I now know what it is that I'm aiming towards

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that I think will make me a lot happier than the traditional route would have made me.

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And I think that being behind is a wonderful opportunity to learn and to grow and to get to know yourself.

438

You don't get to know yourself for that long, you're gonna die so soon.

439

I think that's like the biggest thing, you are going to die so soon so what a blessing it is that you get to know yourself now.

440

So early on in your life, 20 years, so young as well, so young and you get to already have this intimate time to discover yourself and discover your wants and needs.

441

Sorry that that was actually mostly well for.

442

Thank you so much for watching.

443

I really hope that that was somewhat maybe helpful for someone

444

because a lot of the conversation I see around like falling behind is usually quite negative

445

or quite fearful when I think it's so freaking brilliant.

446

Thank you so much for watching.

447

Please like this video if you liked this video.

448

Please subscribe if you would like to hear more from me.

449

Comment and let me know if you have any thoughts at all and I'll see you guys next week.

450

Bye bye!

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

This video has 450 sentences and 5727 words to shadow. The speech runs for 22:03. The speaker talks fast, about 260 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 83% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.

Key vocabulary in this video

15 less common words from the video, with pronunciation and meaning:

impressive /ɪmˈpɹɛsɪv/ (adjective) — Making, or tending to make, a positive impression; having power to impress.
reflect /ɹɪˈflɛkt/ (verb) — To bend back (light, etc.) from a surface.
privilege /ˈpɹɪv.(ɪ.)lɪd͡ʒ/ (noun) — A particular benefit, advantage, or favor; a right or immunity enjoyed by some but not others; a prerogative, preferential treatment.
cousin /ˈkʌz(ə)n/ (noun) — Chiefly with a qualifying word: Any relation (especially a distant one) who is not a direct ancestor or descendant but part of a person's extended family; a…
sixth /sɪksθ/ (adjective) — The ordinal form of the number six.
psychology /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/ (noun) — The study of the human mind.
discover /dɪˈskʌvə/ (verb) — To find or learn something for the first time.
exam /ɪɡˈzæm/ (verb) — Shortened form of examine
regards /ɹɪˈɡɑɹdz/ (noun) — A greeting to pass on to another person.
grammar /ˈɡɹæm.ə(ɹ)/ (noun) — A system of rules and principles for the structure of a language, or of languages in general.
humble /ˈhʌmbəl/ (adjective) — Not pretentious or magnificent; unpretending; unassuming.
blessing /ˈblɛs.ɪŋ/ (noun) — Some kind of divine or supernatural aid, or reward.
milestone /ˈmaɪlˌstoʊn/ (noun) — A stone milepost (or by extension in other materials), one of a series of numbered markers placed along a road at regular intervals, typically at the side of…
flare /flɛɚ̯/ (noun) — A sudden bright light.
horrible /ˈhɔɹ.ɪ.bəl/ (adjective) — Causing horror; terrible; shocking.

Phrasal verbs you will hear

talk about (verb) — Used to draw attention to the speaker's characterization of someone or something.
go into (verb) — To get involved in; to investigate or explore.
end up (verb) — To bring to a conclusion.
go in (verb) — To become obscured by clouds.
do with (verb) — Only used in to do with
figure out (verb) — To come to understand; to discover or find a solution; to deduce.
drop out (verb) — To leave (school, a race, etc.) prematurely and voluntarily.
fall behind (verb) — To be late (for a regular event)

Pronunciation to watch

The speaker uses 219 contractions and reduced forms, such as I'm, don't, I've. Say them the short way, as you hear them.

The “th” sounds: sixth /sɪksθ/, worthy /ˈwɝ.ði/, beneath /bɪˈniːθ/, mathematics /mæθ(.ə)ˈmæt.ɪks/, empathy /ˈɛmpəθi/
The “sh” and “zh” sounds: validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, shield /ˈʃild/, polish /ˈpɑ.lɪʃ/, conventional /kənˈvɛnʃənl̩/, citizenship /ˈsɪtɪzənʃɪp/
Long words — get the stress right: psychology /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/, intensity /ɪnˈtɛnsɪti/, validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, ridiculous /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/

How to practise with this video

Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like impressive, reflect, privilege.

Grammar in this video

The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:

Structure	In the video
Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now	have been · have let · haven't reached
Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it	was really depressed · are closed · aren't closed
Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing	people who have · someone who really · friends who dropped

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

Key vocabulary in this video

Phrasal verbs you will hear

Pronunciation to watch

How to practise with this video

Grammar in this video

What is the Shadowing Technique?