Shadowing Practice: No 1 - Learn English Speaking with Video

well it's not how i feel it's what the science shows

so trauma affects people let's let's define trauma first of all

and you said something in a talk a public talk

that i saw where you said

that it's not what happens to you it's what you make it mean

and what decisions you make afterwards that's what matters and

so trauma is not what happens to you a trauma is

what happens inside you as a result of what happens to you

so trauma means wound literally the meaning of the word trauma means a wound it's a greek word

so for example

if i receive the blow on the head that's not the trauma that's the traumatic event the trauma is

if i develop a concussion

so trauma then is the wound not wounds can be physical obviously

or they can be emotional psychological as a matter of fact given the unity of mind

and body you can't even distinguish between the two properly

so trauma is unhealed wound so early traumas can shape a child's view of themselves

so a lot of people who were traumatized abused for example will be ashamed of themselves because the child

interprets things as being their own fault even though they were simply the victims of somebody else

but shouldn't take everything personally so that

if these things bad things happen to me then I must be a bad person

so there's a trauma that instills very often a shame based view of oneself

trauma shapes one's view of the world so that the world becomes

dangerous and one is always on the alert for bad things to happen or on the other hand

trauma one way to cope with it is deep denial in

which case we tell ourselves that everything is okay

and we don't we don't see what's actually threatening us so it can work both ways trauma

makes it difficult to be in the present moment

so in my marriage for example my wife would say something

and i react

but i won't react as an adult in the present moment i react like a hurt child

which means that some deep memory has been triggered for me

but i'm not realizing that it's memory i think it's in the present

so trauma makes it difficult to be in the present moment because we're always reliving the past without realizing it.

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