Pratica di Shadowing: Fighting Workaholism: You Are Not a Success Machine - Impara a parlare inglese con i video
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as a social scientist I'm intensely interested in addictive behaviors a lot of people watching
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this video right now they're watching it because they want an edge
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and that's great I admire that you're strivers so am I
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but strivers in the striving process
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they open themselves up to one of the most deleterious addictive behaviors known to mankind and that's workaholism people
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People will work hard, it will create dysfunction in their relationships, they will exhibit hiding behavior where they're sneaking around.
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You don't believe it?
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Well, ask yourself, do you sometimes sneak into the bathroom to check your email, your work email?
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Do you snap shut your laptop computer on a Sunday afternoon when your partner comes home?
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Yeah, yeah, well you're doing it too.
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People get defensive when people question how much they're working, well that's classic addictive behavior.
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Now, I have found in my own work that workaholism actually isn't the primary addiction.
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It's a secondary addiction.
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The primary addiction for most strivers is an addiction to success.
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Success is achieving something of merit and being rewarded for it.
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Many strivers, many of my students, me, look, I'm guilty here.
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We feel fully alive when amazing things are happening and we're able to create value.
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And we don't feel fully alive when we're not doing those things, quite frankly.
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It's a real reward to see something come to fruition, to get that deal, to finish that book in my case,
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to teach a class that goes incredibly well, to get that compliment.
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A lot of that success addiction behavior is neurophysiological as a matter of fact.
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You find that people actually get dopamine in a way, that's a neuromodulator that's implicated in all forms of human addiction,
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that they get dopamine specifically when they feel that they're succeeding at work.
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And while they keep seeking those rewards, they keep seeking success, and seeking success is hard.
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You have to excel, and you have to excel compared to other people, and that means you need to outwork other people,
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and that leads to the work addiction.
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The underlying problem is success addiction.
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Behind that, there's actually something even more profound, which is a tendency to reduce yourself to nothing more than a success machine.
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That's a problem.
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That's a moral problem, as a matter of fact you're more than a success machine.
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You're not a robot.
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Neither am I.
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But when you see yourself as the most excellent person, so very special, you've objectified yourself.
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You've taken away a big piece of your humanity.
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Here's basically how I sum this up.
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If you're exhibiting workaholic behavior, you need to deal with it.
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But then the next question is, okay, how do I stop?
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How do I stop?
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Is there a 12 -step program?
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Is there some detox center that I can get into?
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And the answer
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The answer is no, although a lot of people do need to seek help from mental health professionals for this.
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The answer to this is to actually build your team on
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the people who are going to give you the opportunities to do things that are actually more satisfying than that.
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You need to actually take the people that you love the most and that perhaps you've been neglecting and ask them,
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what do you think I should do?
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What do you actually think I should do instead of that?
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But for workaholics, the primary relationship, love relationship in their life is with work.
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That's not a good love relationship because work can't really love you back.
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Work takes.
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Work doesn't give.
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That means usually you need to cultivate the relationships with the people that really can love you back.
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Who are these people?
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Well, I recommend that people actually start to develop a serious spiritual life, a serious spiritual practice, whether it's a religious experience or not
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that depends on different people maybe
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that means reading the wisdom literature getting in touch with the stoic philosophers
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you know studying the works of Johann Sebastian Bach I don't know going back to the faith of your youth
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but something that gives you a relationship with the divine people who are married is doubling
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and tripling down on the on the metaphysical beauty that actually can
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and should be your marital relationship that might be the first time in years you've actually been able to work on that.
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With your children, that was a big one for me, I'm telling you.
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I mean, I can't tell you the number of times
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that I spent that 14th hour in the office instead of my first hour with my kids when they were little.
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Why?
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Because I had to be special instead of happy, right?
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Workaholic special, that's for sure.
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And they got, you know, they got revenge.
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You know what they did?
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They grew up and I wasn't there for a lot of it.
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Well, now, now it's not going to be that way.
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I have deeper friendships than I ever had before, and I recommend that people actually start to develop these real friendships.
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You know, the problem that CEOs have is they have lots of deal friends, but not that many real friends.
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Deal and real.
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You know the difference.
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Deal friends are incredibly useful.
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Real friends are useless.
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They're just people who love you.
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Cultivating those friendships can be the most exciting adventure that you've had in a really, really long time.
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The bottom line is basically this.
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What substitutes for work?
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The answer is love with humans.
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That's what it comes down to.
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Because happiness is love, full stop.
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Okay, how?
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Give me the algorithm, man.
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And I get it, you know, I want that too.
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And so I do have a lot of rules of thumb that I suggest.
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Real friendship has to extend beyond your spouse, for example.
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So real friends are people that you just love.
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You don't need anything from them and they don't need anything from you.
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You really are not going to be getting the benefit
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that you need from your relationships if your only real friend is your spouse.
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And that's typically the case with a lot of strivers.
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So making real friendship, what we call companion and love with a spouse is critically important, but you need at least one more.
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At least one more person.
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And so working on that is critically important.
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Only one more is, it might be the right number for introverts.
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Extroverts, on the other hand, need more friends than that.
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Start with your spouse, if you're married, then move on to one or two
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or three people with whom you can make a real connection and start investing in that relationship.
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And that means if, you know, that person lives in Atlanta, get on the plane, man get on the plane.
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Say, let's go do something for half a day.
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What do you say?
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And they'll be like, you're coming here to do that, to see me?
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You're like, yep, it'll be super fun.
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I guarantee that you actually do that.
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But that's where the investment starts.
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And those are the numbers that we're trying to talk about.
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And anybody can do that.
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Vocabolario e note di pronuncia per questa lezione
Questa lezione di conversazione si basa sul video “Fighting Workaholism: You Are Not a Success Machine”. Le parole che ritornano più spesso: relationship, addiction, success, behavior, strivers. Questo video contiene 109 frasi e 1207 parole da ripetere con lo shadowing. Il parlato dura 6:27. Chi parla va veloce, circa 187 parole al minuto: aspettati suoni legati e ridotti. Il 85% delle parole rientra nelle 3.000 più comuni dell’inglese; conviene studiare le altre prima di iniziare. 17 delle sue 109 frasi sono domande: un buon esercizio per l’intonazione interrogativa e le risposte brevi.
Vocaboli chiave di questo video
15 parole del video che vale la pena imparare, con pronuncia e significato:
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| addiction sostantivo | /əˈdɪkˌʃən/ | dipendenza, assuefazione |
| friendship sostantivo | /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/ | amicizia |
| spouse sostantivo | /spaʊ̯s/ | sposo, sposa |
| reward sostantivo | /ɹɪˈwɔɹd/ | ricompensa |
| addictive aggettivo | /əˈdɪktɪv/ | che causa dipendenza, che dà dipendenza |
| spiritual aggettivo | /ˈspɪɹɪt͡ʃuəl/ | spirituale |
| incredibly avverbio | /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/ | incredibilmente |
| exhibit verbo | /ɪɡˈzɪbɪt/ | mostrare |
| sneak verbo | /sniːk/ | intrufolarsi, sgusciare |
| critically avverbio | /ˈkɹɪt.ɪ.kə.li/ | criticamente |
| excel verbo | /ɪkˈsɛl/ | superare |
| adventure sostantivo | /ədˈvɛn.t͡ʃə/ | avventura |
| moral aggettivo | /ˈmoɹəl/ | morale |
| compare verbo | /kəmˈpɛɚ/ | paragonare |
| guarantee sostantivo | /ˌɡæɹ.ənˈtiː/ | garanzia |
I phrasal verb che sentirai
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| grow up verbo | crescere | |
| take away verbo | /ˌteɪk əˈweɪ/ | togliere |
Frasi da ripetere
Frasi brevi e complete del video che puoi riutilizzare nella conversazione di tutti i giorni:
- You don't believe it?
- You've taken away a big piece of your humanity.
- Here's basically how I sum this up.
- How do I stop?
- You know what they did?
La grammatica di questo video
Le strutture che chi parla usa di più, con le parole esatte del video:
| Struttura | Nel video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + participio passato — un’azione passata che conta ancora adesso | have found · you've objectified · You've taken |
| Frasi relative who / which + frase — un’informazione in più su una persona o una cosa | profound, which is · people who are · people who love |
Pronuncia a cui fare attenzione
Chi parla usa 36 contrazioni e forme ridotte, come you're, don't, they're. Pronunciale nella forma breve, così come le senti.
- I suoni “th”: algorithm /ˈælɡəɹɪðm̩/, thumb /ˈθʌm/
- I suoni “sh” e “zh”: addiction /əˈdɪkˌʃən/, friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/, dysfunction /dɪsˈfʌŋk.ʃən/, fruition /fɹuˈɪʃən/
- Parole lunghe — attenzione all’accento: incredibly /ɪŋˈkɹɛdɪbli/, critically /ˈkɹɪt.ɪ.kə.li/, humanity /hjuˈmænɪti/, philosopher /fəˈlɑsəfɚ/, deleterious /ˌdɛ.ləˈtɪɹ.i.əs/
I suoni difficili per chi parla italiano:
- /h/ — va soffiata, non è muta: happiness /ˈhæpinɪs/, humanity /hjuˈmænɪti/
- Consonante finale — senza aggiungere una vocale dopo: friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/, spouse /spaʊ̯s/, reward /ɹɪˈwɔɹd/, addictive /əˈdɪktɪv/, exhibit /ɪɡˈzɪbɪt/
- /æ/ — più aperta della “e”: guarantee /ˌɡæɹ.ənˈtiː/, happiness /ˈhæpinɪs/, humanity /hjuˈmænɪti/, laptop /ˈlæp.tɑp/, snap /snæp/
Come esercitarsi con questo video
- Ascolta tutto il video una volta senza parlare e annota le parole che non conosci.
- Inizia a velocità 0,75×, fai shadowing frase per frase e torna alla velocità normale quando diventa facile.
- Registrati e confronta con l’originale, facendo attenzione a parole come addiction, friendship, spouse.
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.