Pratica di Shadowing: How to Get Over Someone - Impara a parlare inglese con i video
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We tend to be generous towards people who can't get over someone.
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It sounds romantic, if a little sad.
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The love affair happened a year ago but still the ex's thought remain loyal to every detail of the story.
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Maybe they've moved to another country.
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Perhaps they've married someone else.
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Maybe, they're dead. None of it matters.
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The most famous fictional love affair of the 18th century Goethe's Sorrows of Young Werther is a hugely sympathetic study of this kind of romantic fixation.
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The hero, Werther, an ardent young student falls passionately in love with a charming and beautiful woman named Charlotte.
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She likes him but doesn't love him back in part because she's married to someone else.
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There are plenty of other nice women who single, attractive, and interested in Werther.
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But, he has no time for them.
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The only one he cares for is Charlotte.
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The one who doesn't care for him.
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Eventually, unable to have Charlotte's love Werther decides to kill himself.
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The novel proved hugely charming to its original audiences.
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Who praised it for its deep and pure understanding of love This sort of unrequited passion so often celebrated in literature and society more generally may sound generous, and in that sense, loving, but, a devotion to an unrequited situation is in truth, a clever way of ensuring that we won't end up in a relationship at all.
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That we won't ever need to suffer the realities of love.
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Fixation on an absent other allows us to be publicly committed to love while privately sheltered from any of its more arduous demands.
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The fear of love maybe motivated by a range of factors A squeamishness around hope, a self-hatred which makes someone else's love feel eerie, or a fear of self revelation which breeds a reluctance to let anyone into the secret part of ourselves.
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The fears are serious and deserve sympathy.
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But they are generally not the issues that the romanticly fixated person ever wants to discuss.
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They prefer to keep the spotlight on the unresponsive ex, rather than on their motives for continuing to dwell on them.
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The way to unfixate is not to tell ourselves that we never like the person.
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It's to get very serious and specific about what the attraction was based on.
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And then to come to see that the qualities we had admired in the ex must necessarily exist in the other people who don't have the set of problems that make the original relationship impossible.
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The careful investigation of the character of one person, paradoxically but very liberatingly shows that we could in fact, also love someone else.
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This is not an exercise in getting us to give up on what we really want.
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The liberating move is to see that what we want has to exist in places beyond the pain enducing character we originally identified it in.
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We should gently recognize that being dissapointed and abandoned has its curious satisfactions.
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It is in an emotional sense, a very safe position to be in indeed.
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Yet true love isn't to be acquitted with pining for an absent figure.
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It means daring to engage with a truely frightening prospect.
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A person who is available and thinks despite our strong background supposition to the contrary that we're really rather nice.
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That is perhaps, the only sort of challenge that properly deserve the lyrical and grand word ROMANTIC.
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Informazioni su questa lezione
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.