跟读练习: How to Stop Feeling Nostalgic for an Ex - 通过视频学习英语口语
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After considerable agony, we've left a relationship.
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We're on our own now, and when we can bear to be honest, it is a little bit harder than we expected.
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We aren't going on so many dates.
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The central heating broke down last week.
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The shopping is proving a hurdle.
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In idle moments, we find ourselves daydreaming, returning fondly to certain occasions in the recently concluded relationship.
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There was that wintry weekend by the sea.
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They looked adorable walking on the beach in their thick scarf.
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We fed seagulls and drank cheap wine from paper cups on the sea front and felt connected and happy.
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We're newly conscious of the charm of so many things that seemed ordinary at the time.
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Coming out of the supermarket, putting everything away in the fridge and cupboards, making soup and toasted cheese and watching TV on the sofa.
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With these thoughts in mind, we feel weepy and tender and at points distinctly tempted to call the ex up again.
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They would, we suspect, allow us back or at least give us a hearing.
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What can we make of our feelings?
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It might be that we have realised a genuine mistake.
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But it is even more likely
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that we are in the grip of a characteristic mental habit of the newly single facing the vertigo of independence.
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Nostalgia.
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In the middle of the 19th century, Britain underwent industrial and scientific revolutions that transformed old, settled ways of life, ripping apart communities,
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throwing people together in large and anonymous cities and dislocating the loyalties and certainties once offered by religion.
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In a search for ways to soften the confusion, artists and thinkers began to imagine what a better world might look like,
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and in certain circles, the search turned towards the past, and more specifically, towards the perceived wisdom,
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coherence and contentment of the Middle Ages.
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While railway lines were being laid down across the land and telegraph cables under the seas, members of the artistic class celebrated the simple,
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innocent communities that they proposed had existed in the 12th and 13th centuries.
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Artworks depicted handsome, uneducated but happy labourers,
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cheerful villagers celebrating harvests and kindly lords and ladies ministering to the deserving poor.
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There seemed to be no violence, alienation, fear or cruelty.
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No one minded not having much heating or subsisting on a meagre diet of oats and the odd piece of lard.
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It had, it was alleged, been very much easier back then in the thatched cottages and pious stone churches.
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At the heart of the nostalgic attitude is a disregard for why things ever changed and might have needed to do so.
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For the nostalgic, the past never required alteration or development history moved on but for no sane reason.
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The complexities of the present moment are in this sense deemed wholly accidental.
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They are not the tricky by-products of a legitimate search for growth and progress, away from what must have been at some level, despite the odd delightful occasion,
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perhaps at harvest time or on a midsummer morning, an intolerable previous arrangement.
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The nostalgic can't accept that the present, whatever its faults, came about because of inescapable difficulties with the past.
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They insist that we had already once been perfectly happy, then mysteriously changed everything for the worse because we forgot we had been so.
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Relationships can find us reasoning no less selectively.
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Here too, it can feel as if we must once have been content and then grew ungrateful through error and inattention.
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Yet, in locating profound satisfaction in the past, we are crediting our earlier selves with too little acumen.
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The truth about what a relationship is like
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is best ascertained not when we are feeling low six months or a few years after its conclusion,
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but from what we must have known when we were in its midst,
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when we were most familiar with all the facts upon which we made our slow and deliberate decision to leave.
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The specific grounds for our dissatisfactions tend to evaporate.
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We edit out the rows, the botched trips, the sexual frustrations, the stubborn standoffs.
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The mind is a squeamish organ.
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It doesn't like to entertain bad news unless there is a highly present danger to be attended to.
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But knowing our amnesiac tendencies, we can be certain that profound unpleasantness must have existed,
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for there would otherwise have been no explanation for our decision to rip our relationship apart.
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We would never have needed to act
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if things had ever remotely been as gratifying as we are now nostalgically assuming they were.
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The portrait we are painting of our relationship is emerging not from knowledge but from loneliness and apprehension.
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Furthermore, our sense of ourselves as people who could be satisfied
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with what was on offer is as untrue to our own
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nature as is the fantasy of a modern urban dweller who dreams they might find enduring happiness in a medieval-style wooden hut.
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The solution to the problem of satisfying our needs is not to hallucinate that they don't exist.
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It is to square up to them and use every ingenuity we are capable of to devise workable solutions for them.
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We should trust not what we feel now, in our weepy, disconsolate state, but what we must have known then.
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A simple rule of thumb emerges.
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We must invariably trust the decisions we took when we had the maximal information to hand upon which we made them,
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not when we have emotional incentives to change our minds and mould ourselves into a caricature of an easily gratified creature.
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There were persuasive reasons, even if, in our sadness, we now can't remember a single one.
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Returning to the past wouldn't make us content.
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It would merely, at great cost to all involved, remind us of why change was, in the end, so necessary.
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We need to accept that good things did exist, but that they were no proper solution to certain of our well-founded needs.
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It means accepting that we are as complicated
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and as difficult to satisfy as we are and
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that the way forward is to accept our characters rather than assume a simplicity we could never live up to.
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We should have the courage of, and be ready to pay the full price for, our true complex natures.
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Love is a skill that we can learn.
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Our Relationships book calmly guides us with calm and charm
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through the key issues of relationships to ensure that success in love need not be a matter of good luck.
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For more, click the link now.
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本课的词汇与口语要点
这段视频共有 74 个句子、1099 个单词可供跟读。 讲话部分时长为 7:21。 说话人语速平稳，每分钟约 149 个词，很适合跟读。 只有 79% 的单词属于英语最常用的 3,000 词，词汇难度较高。
视频中的重点词汇
视频中 15 个值得学习的单词，附发音和释义：
| 单词 | 发音 | 释义 |
|---|---|---|
| satisfy 动词 | /ˈsætɪsfaɪ/ | 滿足 /满足 |
| occasion 名词 | /əˈkeɪ̯ʒən/ | 場合 /场合, 機會 /机会 |
| charm 名词 | /t͡ʃɑɹm/ | 護身符 /护身符 |
| harvest 名词 | /ˈhɑɹ.vəst/ | 收穫 /收获 |
| emerge 动词 | /ɪˈmɝd͡ʒ/ | 出現 /出现 |
| complicated 形容词 | /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/ | 複雜 /复杂 |
| railway 名词 | /ˈɹeɪlˌweɪ/ | 鐵路 /铁路, 鐵道 /铁道 |
| thick 形容词 | /θɪk/ | ху, 厚 |
| innocent 形容词 | /ˈɪnəsənt/ | 無猜 /无猜 |
| explanation 名词 | /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/ | 解釋 /解释, 說明 /说明 |
| happiness 名词 | /ˈhæpinɪs/ | 幸福, 快樂 /快乐 |
| ordinary 形容词 | /ˈɔɹdɪnɛɹi/ | 普通, 平常 |
| skill 名词 | /skɪl/ | 技巧, 技能 |
| conclusion 名词 | /kənˈkluːʒən/ | 結束 /结束 |
| connect 动词 | /kəˈnɛkt/ | 連接 /连接 |
视频中出现的短语动词
| 单词 | 释义 |
|---|---|
| break down 动词 | 壞了 /坏了, 出故障 |
需要注意的发音
说话人用了 9 次缩略和弱读形式，例如 can't, we're, aren't。请按听到的简短形式来说。
- “th” 音: thick /θɪk/, furthermore /ˈfɜː(ɹ).ðə(ɹ)ˌmɔː(ɹ)/, thumb /ˈθʌm/, thatch /θæt͡ʃ/, thinker /ˈθɪŋ.kɚ/
- “sh” 和 “zh” 音: occasion /əˈkeɪ̯ʒən/, explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, conclusion /kənˈkluːʒən/, confusion /kənˈfjuːʒən/, conscious /ˈkɑn.ʃəs/
- 长单词——注意重音位置: complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, ordinary /ˈɔɹdɪnɛɹi/, difficulty /ˈdɪfɪkəlti/, considerable /kənˈsɪdəɹəbl̩/
如何用这段视频练习
- 先完整听一遍视频，不要开口，记下不认识的单词。
- 用正常速度逐句跟读，每句重复到你的节奏与说话人一致为止。
- 录下自己的声音并与原声对比，特别注意 satisfy, occasion, charm 这类单词。
视频中的语法
说话人最常用的结构，并附上视频中的原话：
| 结构 | 视频中的用法 |
|---|---|
| 现在完成时 have/has + 过去分词 — 过去发生但与现在仍有关联的事 | we've left · have realised · have been |
| 被动语态 be + 过去分词 — 强调发生了什么，而不是谁做的 | being laid · was alleged · be attended |
什么是跟读法？
跟读法 (Shadowing) 是一种有科学依据的语言学习技巧，最初开发用于专业口译员的培训，并由多语言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。这个方法简单而强大：您在听英语母语原声的同时立即大声重复——就像是一个延迟1-2秒紧跟说话者的影子。与被动听力或语法练习不同，跟读法强迫您的大脑和口腔肌肉同时处理并模仿真实的讲话模式。研究表明它能显着提高发音准确性，语调，节奏，连读，听力理解和口语流利度——使其成为雅思口语备考和真实英语交流最有效的方法之一。