Shadowing Practice: How to never feel embarrassed again - Learn English Speaking with Video

Creating lesson...
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Is embarrassment holding you back in life?
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Are you constantly ashamed of doing anything and you're constantly afraid of other people's opinion so you don't really get anything done?
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Honey, that is the biggest prison you can live in.
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You see, the way I grew up was ever since I was young, I was told to care about my reputation, care about my family's reputation
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and it was so indoctrinated into my minds and into the minds of my siblings to always act a certain way
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and never shame the family because otherwise you would be offed.
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At some point, I started getting tired of it and I realized
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that I cannot achieve anything in life if I am going to follow this mindset.
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So I completely changed my life around when I stopped feeling embarrassed for anything.
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And in this video, I will show you how you can do the same.
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Before we get into the video, I would like to mention that this video is sponsored by BetterHelp.
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but it also gives you 10% off your first month at better help hi guys my name is this
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and welcome back to my channel okay let's get into it first things first realize
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that shame and embarrassment is not your natural state why do i say this
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and we are born as babies we are not born with
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shame we are not born embarrassment we don't know what
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that is a baby is just authentically themselves a child is
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as well until the parents starts to indoctrinate them with their own belief system
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that they have been taught from their own parents you know it goes on for generations generations
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so they put these belief systems that are toxic onto their own children
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so the child starts to think like oh my god
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if i do this that's going to be embarrassing oh my god
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if i do this then that's going to be embarrassing okay this is how i have to act in society
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because this is what is accepted so the child basically starts to believe
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that if i do it this way then i'll be accepted
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but it starts to neglect its authentic self now
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when this happens the child becomes very insecure
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and what happens later on is you have an insecure adult
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because any issue
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that an adult has comes from their childhood you want to fix the adult go back to their childhood
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so what you need to realize then is okay i wasn't
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born with shame i was not born with embarrassment i was
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born with authentically being myself my parents put these limiting beliefs onto me
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and then you have to ask yourself now what do i believe what do i stand for
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and i'm not seeing like things that are bad
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or go do criminal activities but i mean if you're doing something that doesn't harm anyone and makes you happy, then who is anyone to say that you shouldn't be doing that?
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Another thing is forgive yourself for your past mistakes.
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A lot of people still carry shame from the past.
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You might have done something in the past
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that either you did like to yourself and it was very bad
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or you did to someone else and you hurt them and it was very bad.
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Now you might have evolved from that.
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You learned your mistake and you never repeat it again and you were truly remorseful, okay?
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You changed and it's okay to acknowledge that you have changed.
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It's okay to say I'm not that person anymore.
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I don't align with the person that I was years before, you know?
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If you're constantly gonna blame yourself for what happened in the past and constantly feel like, I don't deserve a good life because I did this in the past,
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then you're self-sabotaging yourself.
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Honey, sometimes we have to move on.
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You cannot keep looking there and expect a bright future to come because you're stuck in the past.
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And the past doesn't exist anymore.
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There's nothing you can do right now and change the mistake you made.
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There's nothing you can do and change what happened to you.
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The only thing you can do right now is look in front of you, look in the present and see, okay, what do I have now?
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What can I create now with what I have?
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How do I move forward?
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And also realize that at some point you have to let your brain move on
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because a lot of you guys you guys are constantly replaying past mistakes past traumas all these things
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and what happens is your body and brain constantly believes you're in the same state
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so what happens is you're constantly still depressed you never feel different than you felt before
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and you know why i realized this i was doing the same thing
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so constantly i was trying to heal all my traumas i've
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healed the big traumas then i was working on any trauma there's left
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but what happened then is i was constantly still depressed why
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because my brain believes that i'm still in a traumatic state
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because anytime there is a trauma that comes up i'm hyper focused on it
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and i'm triggered by instead of letting it slide
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and be like okay you can go now this is the past
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and not fighting it i would hyper fixate on it and
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because of that i was constantly still depressed no matter even
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if i was out of the situation i'm still depressed you
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had heartbreak right at some point you need to let go of
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that sadness from it why because the brain when it constantly feels
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that sadness it thinks the situation is all happening over
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and over and over again if you constantly feel embarrassed for something the brain thinks
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that you're doing something embarrassing over and over again so
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that is what you will constantly feel you will cause the fear inside of yourself and you're never able to move on.
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And also own your mistakes.
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Own whatever you did.
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Say, okay, I did it.
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If someone brings it up to you and say, oh, you used to be like this.
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Oh, you did this.
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Remember, remember?
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Say, yes, I remember.
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And I changed and I evolved.
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What now?
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What do you guys want me to do now?
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If you are the one that is constantly shaming yourself for the thing that you did, yeah?
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That's when it becomes embarrassing.
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But when you own that, when you own what happened and when you own what you're ashamed about, no one can hold it over your head only you have power over
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that no one can make you feel embarrassed no one can make you feel ashamed
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when you like what you do when you feel
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that you're like you know what i'm doing a good thing
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i like what i'm putting out whether it's artistically whether you're creating something
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and you're like you know what i love what i put
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out that's good enough no one can make you feel embarrassed only you can do
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that to yourself you can allow people to make you feel like
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that another thing is realize
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that shame is like living in a prison of other people's
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minds you are their little puppets they can make you feel
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anything they can make you feel sad they can make you feel happy like why would you do
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that have you looked at other people see all the people
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that are trying to shame you embarrass you put you down why do they want to put you down
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because they see something in you that you cannot see in yourself
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but they see it people that are down no one puts them down
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because they're not a competition but it's always the people
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that have something there's always the people
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that have this thing in them whether it's a light
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or an energy that people want to bring down
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because they see something in you and once you start to see
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that thing in yourself you will be incredibly powerful they cannot stop you a person
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that understands who they are
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and their power is unstoppable why would you want to live in a prison like
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that imagine you're 80 years old tomorrow
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and you realize i've lived my whole life for other people
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i live my whole life just for other people's opinion do you want to live like
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that you know how fast we age
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you know how fast you'll be 80 years old
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and regret your whole life tomorrow all of these people will die in the end
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and then what and then what you lived for them
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but they they aren't even here anymore also the same people
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that you care so much about about their opinion
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and you don't want to embarrass yourself in front of them
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these people are super weird i've never met a person never i've never met someone
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that is not weird that they have weird like things they have weird behaviors
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but this is very normal this is very normal this makes us a human being
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so who are you trying to impress here no one is perfect
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so you're trying to portray a perfect image to imperfect humans
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and that makes sense to you the same way people are hypocrites okay the same things
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that they will judge you for and shame you for is the same thing that they will do behind closed doors.
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These people are the ones that will be the first one to judge others.
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Why?
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Because day in, day out, these people judge themselves.
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They hate themselves, they're miserable, so they wanna pick on other people so they feel the same way.
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Don't lower yourself for miserable people.
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These people are in the dark leave them there also understand people switch sites very quickly okay it's all fun
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and games and everyone laughs in the beginning they'll laugh at you
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when i was starting at my social media everyone was laughing at me
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because it was embarrassing
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and haha i was a joke okay i'm not a joke
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anymore now it's like oh i used to know her oh my god i people make up stories
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that they used to know me they switch sites
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so quickly once they see that someone becomes popular
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or once they see that other people like them because people are
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so insecure the only thing they do is follow the crowd
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are you trying to impress these people these people you're trying
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to live like whatever for these people you're embarrassed of doing anything just for these people
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that will tomorrow be by your side once you make it
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today they're shaming you tomorrow they will say oh i used to know her
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so just stop trying to be liked in general stop if someone tells you you're smart that doesn't mean you're smart.
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If someone tells you you're stupid, that doesn't mean you're stupid.
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Okay.
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These are all comments from people from their own perception of you.
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None of it is facts.
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Okay.
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Someone can tell you you're smart, but for someone else, you're the most stupid person on earth.
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Same way.
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Not everyone will find you pretty.
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Not everyone will find you funny or like a fun person or someone to look up to.
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They will not.
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And is that wrong?
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No.
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Because people come from different cultures people come from different backgrounds
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they have a different like beauty standard all these things you cannot fit in everywhere
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and start to be okay with
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that not everyone will like you in life once you are just
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so okay with being disliked no one can take that from you
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if like for me for example
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if someone tells me like oh i don't like your content
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okay oh i don't think you're beautiful okay oh i don't think you're shy okay that's what you think
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is that fact no but that's what you think
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and you're entitled to your opinion
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but i don't care about your opinion you see also understand how listening to other people's opinions
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and whatever they think is true when you start to do
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that on a regular basis you will stop trusting yourself
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when you don't trust yourself you become very very insecure what
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happens is imagine you have to make a decision right
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because you feel like you don't you are not capable of
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making decisions on your own you'll constantly consult other people you ask them what you should do
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so you're living according to their opinion so when something happens and you have to decide for yourself
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you'll be like oh no i can't decide for myself you're like a child you're like i can't
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because i don't know i don't know what's best for me
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but you do you do these people don't these people will
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never be in your shoes these people don't know what it's like to be you
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so who are you listening to people
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that can only give outside opinion you should be able to listen to what comes in
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and out and you should be observing it okay
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but then still make your own decision and still say i am the one
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that i trust i am the one
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that i go to to make the final decision
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and no one else i'm the kind of person i will consult people
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when i'm making a decision but at the end i will always do what i wants
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and everyone knows this and sometimes i make mistakes
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but you know what i made the decision to make
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that mistake so at the end i'm still confident in myself
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because whether it went wrong or whether it went right liz made the decision
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and not other people
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because their opinions are not more important than mine their voice is not more important than mine also understand
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that you deserve whatever blessing you have or whatever blessing you want.
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Okay.
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God didn't put you on earth to struggle.
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I want you to stop believing this.
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This is the most, the biggest lie I've seen people tell each other that, oh, we're meant to struggle.
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No, struggle is not cool.
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Not in relationship, not in friendship, not in work.
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It's not meant to be a struggle.
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If you need to struggle to keep something together, like a relationship, friendship, or a job, then it's not for you.
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Something that is for you, you will not need to be struggling for it You will
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not need to be desperate for it It will align with you
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And it will come in the highest way When you need to struggle, it's a sign it's not for you And you're holding on to something that you need to let go of.
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When you put those limitations on yourself or you're shaming yourself for wanting a better life or something bigger or whatever, you will not achieve that thing.
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Because at the end of the day, even though you want it, you're still telling yourself that what you want is a bad thing.
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But who told you it's a bad thing?
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Who told you?
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Because people always say like, oh, if you want more, like more luxuries in your life, you're a vain person.
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No, maybe some people genuinely like luxuries maybe they like living the
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big life why do you care some people genuinely don't want
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that some people want a simple life and
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that that's also good right why do you judge the one
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but not the other whatever you want whatever good you want you deserve it just
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because you're alive just because you're on this earth
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and you can create the most beautiful life for yourself you don't have to listen to people
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that say like oh no you're supposed to suffer no no no you're supposed to suffer take
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that all that suffering on this earth
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and put it onto you okay you have that miserable life but
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when i'm 80 tomorrow honey i have my best life i
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know this for sure liz lived her best life also realize
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that shame is a fearful emotion and it keeps you stuck see the people
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that have no embarrassment
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and have no shame they get the furthest in life you
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can see them online a lot of people online are making
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so much money and a lot of people are laughing at them
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but they're also laughing from their mansions at you guys
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so who has the last laugh
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because at the end of the day they're still creating their
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stuff they're still putting it out there yeah you find it funny
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but they don't have a lot of financial issues anymore
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and they're the one getting financially blessed
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because they're not afraid to be themselves online
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when you constantly have this like oh this is not good enough oh this will be embarrassing oh this
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and that yeah you will not create anything you will not do anything in your life
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and you will live a whole life wasted thinking about like, oh my God, people would find this embarrassing.
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It's embarrassing to be old and have a life lived for other people.
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Last but not least, I want you to realize that you are good enough now.
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You are good enough now who you are with what you have.
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And that's what you have to do.
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Right now, you have to like be who you are, take what you have and create what you can.
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Don't look at, oh my God, I used to, oh my God, i am going to what do you have now what can
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we do now with what you have okay well what can
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we create what are you good at what do you love
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to do what do you want to improve i used to have this mentality of like oh
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if i do this and if i'm at
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that state then i will start and then i will do it
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and i was constantly seeking a perfection that will never be there
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because like i said people might look at you someone might
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say oh this is perfect another person might say this is bullshit
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and both are not wrong you know it's their opinion
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so you can never reach that perfection so for example
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if I hadn't started three years ago with my youtube channel I would not be where I'm at right now
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which is I have much more wisdom by things I read
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much more I also learned these things whilst I was going you know
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but imagine I had never uploaded my first video three years
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ago I would not be in this position imagine I was scared of people
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or I was scared because all my family this and
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that no this was beneficial for everyone at the end okay
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and i took that risk because i believed in myself
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when no one believed in me i believed in myself
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and i refused to give up on myself
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and you should do the same thing other people will never
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show up for you like you have to show up for
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yourself you know one day it's gonna be you like
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when you're sick or whatever or like you don't look good anymore
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or whatever like a lot of people will leave your life
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because they cannot benefit from you anymore
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but who has to stay with you you you're the only one you will always have in the end
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and that's the one you're neglecting for people
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that will leave your life tomorrow
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if you can't benefit them never ever dim your lights for people
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that enjoy being in the darkness anyways guys thank you
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so much for watching but before i go i want to mention
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that i have created something with my agency
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and team we have created something very beautiful some products
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that I love
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and I know you guys would love to have the website linked the store downstairs in the description
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if you can click on it and if you can write down your email
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and also click on the survey so
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that we can understand what you guys want in the future
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that will be very helpful and I'm just
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so excited I cannot wait to share what it is
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and yeah okay um I love you guys so much
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and yeah thank you so much for watching love you I hope this helped Bye.

Context & Background

The speaker in the video addresses the pervasive feelings of embarrassment that many individuals experience throughout their lives. With a candid recounting of their upbringing, they reflect on how societal and familial pressures can lead to a mindset filled with shame and self-doubt. The speaker encourages viewers to embrace their authentic selves and to understand that feelings of embarrassment are taught, not innate. This crucial realization can pave the way for personal growth and self-acceptance. By shedding the chains of societal expectations, individuals can live more freely and confidently, enhancing their overall quality of life.

Top 5 Phrases for Daily Communication

  • “I was not born with embarrassment.” - A powerful reminder to cultivate confidence.
  • “What is accepted in society?” - A reflective question to examine societal norms.
  • “You can literally look online.” - Encouragement to seek resources in the digital world.
  • “A child is just authentically themselves.” - Recall the freedom of childhood and aim to reconnect with it.
  • “I completely changed my life around.” - An inspiring statement about personal transformation.

Step-by-step Shadowing Guide

Improving your English speaking skills through the shadowing technique can be a game-changer. Here’s how to effectively use this video to enhance your English proficiency:

  1. Select a Short Segment: Choose a brief segment of the video that resonates with you or contains valuable phrases. Aim for about one to two minutes of dialogue.
  2. Listen Carefully: Play the selected segment a couple of times to familiarize yourself with the rhythm and pronunciation of the speech. Focus on how the speaker intonates their words.
  3. Repeat and Imitate: Use the shadow speech technique by repeating the sentences immediately after hearing them. Mimic the speaker's tone, speed, and accent, which will aid in improving your English pronunciation.
  4. Slow it Down: If necessary, adjust the playback speed to slow down the audio. This allows you more time to articulate each word clearly.
  5. Record Yourself: Use a notepad app or recording software to capture your voice as you practice. Compare your pronunciation and intonation with the original speaker, noting areas for improvement.
  6. Daily Practice: Set aside time each day for this speaking practice. Regular exposure to natural conversational patterns will bolster your confidence and fluency.

By implementing these steps and utilizing engaging content, you can significantly enhance your mastery of English speaking and feel more empowered in everyday interactions. Whether you’re tackling daily conversations or practicing for professional settings, the shadowing technique is an effective method to expand your linguistic skills.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.