Shadowing Practice: I changed my reality (here's how) - Learn English Speaking with Video
Creating lesson...
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I've definitely just entered a new chapter.
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I've moved city, I've cut people off that no longer served me, I've got new friends, I've got incredible work opportunities
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and it got me thinking about how many versions of myself have existed
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and how many different chapters I've been through in my 20s and I thought we could talk about that in today's video.
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I am such a firm believer that you can create your own reality and you can create your own dream life.
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I've had so many different versions of what my dream life looks like.
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I mean, if you would have asked me in my early 20s what my dream life would be, it would be living in the city, shopping, being financially free and having time,
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which is why I wanted to be self-employed.
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And I felt really guilty because before I moved to London, I was feeling so unhappy with my life.
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And I think it's because I'd almost achieved everything that I wanted to achieve.
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I lived in the big city.
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I had financial freedom.
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I had so much time to spare where I could get into some hobbies like I got into Pilates and other things.
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That made me happy for a certain amount of time
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and then I forgot that I'm allowed to evolve and I'm allowed to want new things.
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A couple months ago I did my big brain dump on YouTube.
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I was so unhappy in that period.
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Every day looked the same.
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I wasn't really challenging myself.
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I wasn't growing as a person.
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You grow so much when you're uncomfortable because you're learning so many lessons.
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And I needed to make myself uncomfortable again.
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Moving to a city where I have no family.
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I've got, well, I've got friends here, but I just didn't have any like close, close friends here.
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It was a risk.
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It was really scary.
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Now I've been here, I think I've been here a month.
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I'm so happy and I feel like my soul's happy to see a different life, if that makes sense.
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I think sometimes you can get
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so stuck in thinking how your life looks right now is just how it looks and that's what it is.
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And you just kind of surrender to it.
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But if you want to change your reality, let me tell you, you can do that.
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It is scary and sometimes you do have to take risks.
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I believe if you do some inner work
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and you find out what your soul and what your subconscious wants and then you chase that,
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it will only ever work out for you because that was what you're meant to be doing and that was your purpose, if that makes sense.
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I'm going to tell you a couple of the steps that I've made to change my reality to what it is now.
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I was living what I thought my dream life was.
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And it was at the time.
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I was so happy doing my Pilates, getting matcha every day.
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I lived in what then was my dream apartment.
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But after a while, it got kind of boring.
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It got kind of repetitive.
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I was living the same day every day.
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And it was making me really unhappy.
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It was making me almost self-destruct.
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I wasn't actually looking at why I was unhappy.
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I was just kind of going about my day and just thinking, oh, happiness will come back soon.
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But I've just got to wait it out.
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Rather than actually thinking, wait, what do I need to change here?
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And when I looked at my relationships, when I looked at where I lived, when I looked at my work and how I spent my days, I was like, right, this is what is making me unhappy.
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So we need to change that.
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It sounds really cringe, but it is
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so important to talk to yourself in situations or moments like this
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because the most important relationship you will ever have is the relationship that you have with yourself.
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You're the only person that is going to be in your life forever.
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You need a relationship with yourself.
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And if you can't talk to yourself and ask yourself questions like, does this make me happy?
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Am I living a life that I'm content with or
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that is pushing me for growth or am I in a job that makes me feel fulfilled?
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If you can't sit down and ask yourself these questions and actually have a conversation with yourself, then you're never actually going to align with your true self.
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You're only ever going to want what's best for you.
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You have to do what's best for you, even if other people don't like it,
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which I think is what stops a lot of people because change is uncomfortable and not many people like change.
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I quite enjoy change because it makes me grow it's uncomfortable
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but it makes me grow not everyone thinks like that so
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if you're changing people are gonna try and keep you the same
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because that changes their reality which makes them feel uncomfortable
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so you've kind of got to push past that
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and even just talking to people
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and being like i'm not happy where i am right now i want to do this
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so many people were putting me off moving to London.
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I hope he doesn't mind me saying this but my dad being one of them.
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I think me moving here on my own it really worried him.
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When he came to move all of my stuff into my
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new apartment he was like okay I get it now like this area is
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so lovely and everyone's really polite it feels safe.
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So had I had listened to my dad
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and stayed in Manchester I'd still be stuck in this mindset
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where I felt stagnant I wouldn't have the opportunities I have
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now you've just got to do whatever is best for you
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and I think when you talk to yourself
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and you do some inner work you're gonna know what's best for you the one person
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that is gonna know how to look after you better than anyone is yourself sometimes your mom
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but mostly yourself but you can't let other people stop you
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or hold you back I mean I always get comments saying how much I've changed
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and I'm thinking well yeah who wants to stay the same
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if i was the same as
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when i started my youtube channel then i've not evolved as
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a person i've not grown i've not experienced a different reality
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and that was another thing
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that i just wanted to touch on really quickly you only
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get one life you may as well live as many versions
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of yourself in this life as you possibly can then you get to experience more
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and i mean the fact
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that i've now got to experience a new city who knows i might move to another city one day
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but the fact that I've given myself
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that experience in my lifetime makes me really happy I'm not
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going to live in Manchester for all of my life
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if that's what you want to do
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and you want to live in the same city for the rest of your life
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that is so okay but for me I thrive off new experiences
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which is why I love traveling so much and I think
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when you know yourself you know what your soul wants I know
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that I love to learn new things and learn about new cultures and travel and because I know that about myself,
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I know what I then devote my time to and what I prioritize.
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But yeah, after doing this inner work, I'm realizing that I wanted new friendships.
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I wanted a new city.
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I prayed for more fulfilling days.
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When I moved here, I've not had one day where I felt homesick.
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I've not felt lonely.
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I've not felt like this was a big mistake.
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I knew that this was the right decision and that's only because I listened to myself.
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No one was telling me to move to London.
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In fact, most people that I talked to was actually trying to put me off the idea.
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I knew in my heart that this was the right decision and like I said, I've not regretted it once.
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I'm so happy with this new life and this new version of myself.
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And it's so nice for me because I've basically documented the past 10 years, like I said, on YouTube.
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And being able to look back at all of the different versions of myself that I've gone through.
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It's very humbling and I mean, I was gonna say kind of embarrassing,
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but it's actually not embarrassing because that girl right at the start led me to where I am today.
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Something that I had to learn is your identity is not set in stone.
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I think growing up a Jehovah's Witness, if you're new here, I grew up a Jehovah's Witness.
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I think for me, the biggest realization
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that I could change my identity and change who I was was
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when I left the religion because I thought that religion was tied down to my identity.
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The fact that I never celebrated Christmas, the fact that I never celebrated birthdays.
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I went to Kingdom Hall twice a week.
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Like that was my reality that I lived with for so long that I felt like I couldn't get out of.
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It does consume so much of your life.
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So when I came out of the religion, I was like, oh, I can actually control what I do with my life.
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And I think that's where I realized, probably when I was like 21, when I realized that I can make my life.
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I can basically create a life however I want to.
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And that's when the real shift happens.
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I moved out, I moved into my city apartment.
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I always say this, but my favorite show growing up, even though I was a Jehovah's Witness and I probably shouldn't have been watching it was Sex and the City.
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My whole self right now, I feel like Sex and the City shaped it.
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I love Carrie Bradshaw.
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I loved her lifestyle.
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That's why I became who I became in my 20s.
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I wanted someone that owned so many pairs of shoes
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and handbags and had an incredible wardrobe and lived in the city
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and just gallivanted about and dated and had fun and had loads of friends and that's how I spent my 20s.
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That's how I wanted my life to look and that's basically how it's looked and I still love doing those things,
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don't get me wrong, but I just was ready for a change.
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I was ready to level up in some way for as much as I'm still going to shop, I'm still going to do Pilates, I'm still going to have my matcha.
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Although I've been on my coffee hype recently so maybe this is the new version of myself.
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My new version is an iced americano yum there's some more things
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that i want to add to my life that's just going
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to make it feel more fulfilling sorry this isn't really an
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anything video it's just me kind of telling you what's been on my mind this week
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and it was just the fact
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that i feel like a new version of myself all over again
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and that's not to say
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that i don't love any of the old versions of myself i think people get it twisted
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that because you're wanting to change all the time and wanting to evolve, whether it's your hair, your relationships,
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where you live, I think some people, not everyone, but some people can take that and think you hate yourself because you're always wanting to change.
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That's not the case at all.
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You have to do whatever makes you happy in this era of your life right now.
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You can also change your mind.
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Don't ever think because you've said something once, like for example, I don't want to have kids that
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when you meet your right person
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and you think I could imagine having this person's child you can't change your mind that's just an example
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but you have every right to change your mind
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if there's a part of you that you don't like about yourself
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which I've been doing a lot of shadow work recently
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and there's a lot about myself that I have buried deep
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and chosen to ignore
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that has now come to the surface shadow work is no joke you want me to talk about
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that in another video then we'll talk about it
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but shadow work is the most humbling thing i have ever done a lot got brought to the surface
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that i didn't like about myself but all of these things
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that i don't like about myself guess what i can change
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so it's not actually that scary it might take a lot of work
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but these things that i've been ashamed of that i haven't wanted to acknowledge I can just get rid of.
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I can actually just stop that and think, okay, I'm not going to do that anymore.
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I'm going to do this instead.
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Guys, we might only get this one life.
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I say might because who knows?
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Please, you have to make it a fulfilling one.
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Obviously, you're not going to be happy all of the time, but I think we should be happy the majority of the time.
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So we want to create a life that supports that, right?
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And I think it starts with asking if you're happy in your life right now.
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Look at your relationships.
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Look at what you do for a living.
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Look at what you're studying.
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Look at where you live.
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Look at your daily habits.
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Is the way you're living your life making you feel fulfilled?
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Does it make you feel happy?
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Does it make you excited to wake up in the morning?
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Let me tell you, I've been naturally waking up around 6am
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which is like two hours earlier than I need to be awake.
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I am so excited to start my day that I just get up at 6am.
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That's never been me.
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I've always been like okay I've got two hours, great, back to sleep.
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I'm so excited to get up and start my day
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because I've shifted and created this reality that I'm now so happy with.
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That it's just the best feeling in the world
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and that's why I wanted to talk about it in this video
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because I want everyone to feel how I feel
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when I've been waking up in the morning
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so you've got to ask yourself if you're happy right now and
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if not think about little ways you can change your life
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I think don't get overwhelmed with thinking you have to change
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everything right now maybe just do it really slowly try something new every month
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if you want to change your body for example maybe just start working out once a week then maybe twice a week.
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Find a workout that works for you, whether it's Pilates, whether it's going to the gym, whether it's even doing like a team sport.
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After that, you want to change your job.
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Maybe either look for another job, think about what it is that you want to do, make little steps to start that business.
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And then this is where the uncomfortableness comes in because with working out, yes, you're pushing yourself to get to the gym, which can sometimes feel uncomfortable, but
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quitting your job that's really uncomfortable like
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that can put you in a state of fight or flight
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and it can feel like you're going backwards instead of forwards
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don't be irresponsible with it make sure you've got some sort of income
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or some sort of support but
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if you just think oh well this job is supporting me right now
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and if i quit then i'm not going to have any money then that's not going to get you anywhere
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so maybe start looking for the new job
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or thinking about what you want to do and finding ways to support
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that if you're unhappy in your city maybe look at how you would want to live your life whether
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that is going and living a soft life there's another version of me
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that exists that wants to move to Italy work in a coffee shop from seven till three
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and then spend the rest of the day on a beach
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reading a book drinking wine having a picnic on the beach like there is another version of me
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that exists that wants that maybe that will come in my 30s who knows
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but think about the life you want to live whether you
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want i mean right now i wanna hustle like i wanna
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build something for myself where's the best place to do
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that in the capital in london
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so that's why i moved to london you've just got to think about what will make you happy right now
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and have a good chat with yourself i hope all of this made sense this was kind of like a podcast.
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I always say I want to do more videos like this
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because I don't want to have a podcast
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but sometimes I've just got things to say and things to share
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and I only want you guys to be happy so any advice
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that I can give you on being happier I'm always going to share it.
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But anyway I hope you enjoyed this video.
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Thank you so much for watching me and thank you to people that have been around for a long time.
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I always get subscribers coming up to me telling me that
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they've watched me for years and they've watched me
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when I was blonde when I was with my ex-boyfriends
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and I just wanted to say thank you for sticking around for every version of myself
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and I promise I'm going to keep growing I'm going to
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keep becoming better the channel is going to keep growing I'm becoming better
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so yeah thank you for watching I love you all so much and I will see you in the next video
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This video has 246 sentences and 3083 words to shadow. The speech runs for 15:54. The speaker talks fast, about 194 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 86% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 less common words from the video, with pronunciation and meaning:
- uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/ (adjective) — Not comfortable; causing discomfort.
- unhappy /ʌnˈhæpi/ (adjective) — Not happy; sad.
- fulfill /fʊlˈfɪl/ (verb) — To satisfy, carry out, bring to completion (an obligation, a requirement, etc.).
- shadow /ˈʃædəʊ̯/ (noun) — A dark image projected onto a surface where light (or other radiation) is blocked by the shade of an object.
- scary /ˈskɛə.ɹi/ (adjective) — Causing fear or anxiety
- evolve /ɪˈvɑlv/ (verb) — To move (something) in regular procession through a system.
- podcast /ˈpɑdˌkæst/ (noun) — A program, especially an audio program, produced on a regular basis, delivered over the Internet in a compressed digital format and designed for playback on…
- humble /ˈhʌmbəl/ (adjective) — Not pretentious or magnificent; unpretending; unassuming.
- ignore /ɪɡˈnɔː/ (verb) — To deliberately not listen or pay attention to.
- naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/ (adverb) — In a natural manner.
- lesson /ˈlɛs.ən/ (noun) — A section of learning or teaching into which a wider learning content is divided.
- chase /t͡ʃeɪs/ (verb) — To follow at speed.
- happiness /ˈhæpinɪs/ (noun) — The emotion of being happy; joy; elation.
- pray /pɹeɪ/ (verb) — To direct words, thoughts, or one's attention to a deity or any higher being, for the sake of adoration, thanks, petition for help, etc.
- friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/ (noun) — The condition of being friends.
Phrasal verbs you will hear
- look at (verb) — To observe or watch.
- live in (verb) — To reside on the premises of one's employer (used especially of domestic staff such as nannies, cooks, maids, etc.)
- think about /ˈθɪŋk əˌbaʊt/ (verb) — To ponder.
- talk about (verb) — Used to draw attention to the speaker's characterization of someone or something.
- grow up (verb) — To mature and become an adult.
- come in /ˌkʌm ˈɪn/ (verb) — To enter.
- get into (verb) — To move into (an object), such that one ends up inside it.
- look for (verb) — To seek.
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 117 contractions and reduced forms, such as I've, I'm, you're. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: shadow /ˈʃædəʊ̯/, friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/, shoe /ˈʃu/, ashamed /əˈʃeɪmd/, realization /ˌɹɪə.laɪˈzeɪ.ʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/, naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, realization /ˌɹɪə.laɪˈzeɪ.ʃən/, irresponsible /ˌɪɹ.əˈspɑn.sə.bəl/, repetitive /ɹɪˈpɛtɪtɪv/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like uncomfortable, unhappy, fulfill.
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | have been watching · I've been doing · I've been waking |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | I've definitely just entered · I've moved · have existed |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | be stuck · is not set |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | reality which makes · gym, which can |
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.