Shadowing Practice: How our expectations shape what we see, hear, and feel - Learn English Speaking with Video
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It can certainly feel like emotions happen to you, that they bubble up and that they cause you to do and say things.
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But that experience is an illusion that the brain creates.
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Not everybody has as much control as they might like, but everybody has a little more control than they think they do.
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When you're experiencing emotion or you're in an emotional state, what your brain is doing is telling itself a story about
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what is going on inside your body in relation to what's happening in the world.
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Your brain is always regulating your body.
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Your body is always sending sensory information back to your brain.
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And your brain isn't wired in a way for you to experience those sensory changes specifically.
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Instead, what you experience is a summary.
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And that's where those simple feelings come from.
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If you understand that every experience you have now becomes part of your brain's ability to predict,
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then you realize that the best way to change your past is to change your present.
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Just in the same way that you would exercise to make yourself healthier,
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you can invest energy to cultivate different experiences for yourself.
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The fact that your brain is using your past experience to predict what you're going to see and hear and feel
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means that you are an architect of your experience.
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And that doesn't involve breaking predictions.
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It involves seeding your brain to predict differently.
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It's my belief that the way in which emotions evolved was to deal with things like saber-toothed tigers,
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the current incarnation of which is the car that's suddenly lurching at your car at a high speed.
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You don't have time to think.
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In split seconds, you have to do and make very complex decisions.
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And if you had to think about what you were doing, you'd be dead.
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It's a system that evolved to deal with really important things without your thinking about.
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So that means that sometimes you're going to be very unconsidered, very thoughtless.
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Well, these exercises that we're giving people, moving their facial muscles,
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concentrating on the sensations to make them more aware of an emotion
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when it arises so that they will feel it at the moment
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and then can say did you really mean to ignore me?
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No. It was just an accident or maybe I shouldn't jump to the conclusion that she doesn't care about me at all.
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The way in which we can improve of our emotional life is to introduce conscious awareness.
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Nature did not want you to do that.
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So you have to do it yourself.
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All relationships are colored with expectations about myself and about the other.
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My expectations influence that which I then see or hear.
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It is a filter as well as my mood.
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That is one of the most important things to understand about relationships and communication
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is how people actually co-create each other in the context of a relationship, because those people make part of who we are.
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We will draw from them the very things which we expect from them, even when it's the opposite of what we really want.
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A lot of emphasis is put on our ability to say certain things, to say them in the right way,
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to articulate our needs, our feelings, our thoughts, our positions, our opinions.
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What is lacking is the ability to see
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that speaking is entirely dictated by the quality of the listening that is reflected back on us.
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If I am talking to someone who is on their phone, I will be expressing myself and experiencing the communication completely different than
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if I am speaking to someone who is looking at me in the eyes who says to me, I get it, I understand.
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Not necessarily I agree, because ultimately, if I speak to you, and in the end, I live feeling even more alone,
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I am literally in an existential crisis.
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There is nothing worse than to be alone in the presence of another.
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So when you listen to me, the first thing I need to know is that I have your attention.
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The second thing I need to know is that maybe you can acknowledge the validity of my point of view.
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And potentially you may even empathize with my point of view.
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You can understand why I would think or feel or experience things the way I do.
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That reflecting back, acknowledging, validating, empathizing.
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That sequence is where the depth of communication takes place.
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When you enter this world, you're not wired full of memories that your brain will use to predict.
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Other people cultivate your world
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and as a consequence they are wiring your brain full of experiences that your brain will then use to predict.
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So as an adult you can make decisions about what you experience now.
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You can make choices about how you act and those decisions
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and choices either reinforce the predictions that your brain makes or it changes them.
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Sometimes in life we are responsible for changing things not
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because we're culpable or to blame for those things but because we're the only ones who can change them.
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You always have tools available at your disposal to heal yourself,
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to act differently, and to feel differently.
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Bu dersin kelimeleri ve konuşma notları
Bu videoda gölgeleme çalışması için 64 cümle ve 881 kelime var. Konuşma bölümü 6:51 sürüyor. Konuşmacı dakikada yaklaşık 128 kelimelik dengeli bir hızla konuşuyor; gölgeleme için rahat bir tempo. Kelimelerin %87’i İngilizcede en sık kullanılan 3.000 kelime arasında; geri kalanına başlamadan önce bakmakta fayda var.
Bu videodaki önemli kelimeler
Videodan öğrenmeye değer 15 kelime, telaffuzu ve anlamıyla:
| Kelime | Telaffuz | Anlam |
|---|---|---|
| predict fiil | /pɹɪˈdɪkt/ | öngörmek, tahmin etmek |
| emotion isim | /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/ | duygu, his |
| wire isim | /ˈwaɪɚ/ | tel |
| reflect fiil | /ɹɪˈflɛkt/ | yansıtmak |
| sensory sıfat | /ˈsɛn.sə.ɹi/ | duyusal, duyumsal |
| ignore fiil | /ɪɡˈnɔː/ | görmezden gelmek |
| awareness isim | /əˈwɛɹ.nəs/ | bilinç, bilinçlenme |
| muscle isim | /ˈmʌs.əl/ | kas, adale |
| conclusion isim | /kənˈkluːʒən/ | son |
| introduce fiil | /ˌɪntɹəˈdus/ | tanıştırmak |
| seed isim | /siːd/ | tohum, tane |
| summary isim | /ˈsʌm.ə.ɹi/ | özet, fezleke |
| relation isim | /ɹɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/ | akraba |
| tiger isim | /ˈtaɪɡə/ | kaplan |
| filter isim | /ˈfɪltɚ/ | filtre |
Dikkat edilecek telaffuzlar
Konuşmacı you're, we're, doesn't gibi kısaltılmış biçimleri 14 kez kullanıyor. Bunları duyduğunuz gibi kısa söyleyin.
- “th” sesleri: tooth /tuθ/, empathize /ˈɛmpəˌθaɪz/, thoughtless /ˈθɔtləs/
- “sh” ve “zh” sesleri: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, prediction /pɹɪˈdɪkʃən/, conclusion /kənˈkluːʒən/, potentially /pəˈtɛnʃ(ə)li/
- Uzun kelimeler — vurguyu doğru yere koyun: differently /ˈdɪf.ə.ɹənt.li/, expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, potentially /pəˈtɛnʃ(ə)li/, validity /vəˈlɪd.ɪ.ti/
Bu videoyla nasıl çalışılır
- Videonun tamamını konuşmadan bir kez dinleyin ve bilmediğiniz kelimeleri not edin.
- Normal hızda cümle cümle tekrar edin; ritminiz konuşmacıyla aynı olana kadar her cümleyi yineleyin.
- Kendinizi kaydedin ve orijinaliyle karşılaştırın; predict, emotion, wire gibi kelimelere özellikle dikkat edin.
Bu videodaki dil bilgisi
Konuşmacının en çok kullandığı yapılar, videodaki sözcüklerin aynısıyla:
| Yapı | Videoda |
|---|---|
| Edilgen yapı be + fiilin üçüncü hâli — kimin yaptığı değil, ne olduğu önemli | isn't wired · are colored · is put |
| İlgi cümlecikleri who / which + cümle — bir kişi ya da şey hakkında ek bilgi | someone who is · ones who can |
Gölgeleme Tekniği Nedir?
Gölgeleme, başlangıçta profesyonel tercüman eğitimi için geliştirilen ve çok dilli Dr. Alexander Arguelles tarafından popüler hale getirilen, bilim destekli bir dil öğrenme tekniğidir. Yöntem basit ama güçlüdür: ana dili İngilizce olan bir sesi dinler ve hemen yüksek sesle tekrar edersiniz — konuşmacıyı 1-2 saniye gecikmeyle takip eden bir gölge gibi. Pasif dinleme veya dilbilgisi alıştırmalarının aksine, gölgeleme beyninizi ve ağız kaslarınızı gerçek konuşma kalıplarını eşzamanlı olarak işlemeye ve yeniden üretmeye zorlar. Araştırmalar, telaffuz doğruluğu, tonlama, ritim, bağlı konuşma, dinleme anlama ve konuşma akıcılığını önemli ölçüde geliştirdiğini göstermektedir — bu da onu IELTS Konuşma hazırlığı ve gerçek dünya İngilizce iletişimi için en etkili yöntemlerden biri yapar.