Shadowing Practice: Who you are fluctuates every single second | Lisa Feldman Barrett - Learn English Speaking with Video
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51 sentences
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The question of who you are is a non -answerable question.
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The question of who you are in a moment, that is an answerable question.
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I have a very bad habit of interrupting people when they're talking.
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And it can seem really rude.
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Let's say in a conversation I'm experiencing great enthusiasm and I cut somebody off.
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So I'm just going to respond to what I think they're going to say.
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I don't wait for them to finish what they're saying and another person experiences me as rude does
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that mean I'm rude I think it does I'm experiencing myself as engaged another person is experiencing me as rude
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and that's what's real not because their experience is more important than mine
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but because it's equally important to mine the characteristics or traits
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that we think are inherent to a person are not inherent to that person.
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They exist to describe that person in relation to other conditions.
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So if everything that exists exists in relations, then what does that mean for who you are?
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In many cultures, we have the idea that a person is bound by the skin.
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What is inside your skin is you, and what is outside your skin is not you.
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In fact, every personality test, you're an introvert, you're an extrovert, you're this kind of person or that kind of person,
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these are characteristics that we assume are inherent to the person.
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But the logical implication of relational realism is that I am not the sole author of my identity,
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and I don't have the sole power over who I am.
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To ask a generic question like, how extroverted are you, assumes that the context doesn't matter, when really you should be asking,
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well, how extroverted are you when you're interacting with people
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that you know and you've had a lot of sleep and you're at a dinner party versus how extroverted are you when,
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you know, you're with people that you don't know and you've had a lot of sleep and,
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you know, you haven't had anything to eat recently, right?
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So the point is that what describes you, who you are, is highly situated.
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As a person, that feels inherently wrong to me, but as a scientist, it seems right.
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This idea violates every subjective sense that many of us have,
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that we have these enduring characteristics that describe us no matter where we are and who we're with.
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But the science doesn't bear that out.
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If we stop time, your brain has a set of patterns in it.
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And based on the statistics of the past, your brain begins to make an action plan for the next moment.
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And your lived experience results from that action plan.
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That is what we call meaning -making.
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And the whole thing is happening predictively and most of the time outside of your awareness.
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That's the best scientific understanding we have right now about how your brain works.
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Everything you do is an act of meaning -making.
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Even asking the question, who am I, and creating a story is an act of meaning -making.
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The biology of meaning -making, that is your perception box.
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What this means is that you don't have a perception box with fixed walls.
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You have a momentary fluctuating set of signals in your brain
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that is helping to make sense of what's happening in your body and what's happening in the world.
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The logical thing to carry away here is that we have more responsibility for the identities
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of other people than we might think.
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And the people who we interact with have more influence over who we are in a moment than we might like.
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One way you can have a little more control over who
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you are in any given moment is by taking more deliberate responsibility over who you interact with
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and how you interact with them.
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You know, I remember when my daughter went to college,
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I said to her, seek out the people who allow you to be the best version of yourself.
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Find the people who help you to be that person.
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That's the message.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “Who you are fluctuates every single second”. The speaker keeps coming back to these words: rude, meaning, brain, moment, extroverted. This video has 51 sentences and 691 words to shadow. The speech runs for 5:16. The speaker talks at a steady 131 words per minute, a comfortable pace for shadowing. 86% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| rude adjective | /ɹuːd/ | Lacking in refinement or civility; bad-mannered; discourteous. |
| interact verb | /ɪn.təˈɹækt/ | To engage in communication and other shared activities (with someone). |
| characteristic noun | /ˌkæɹ(ə)ktəˈɹɪstɪk/ | A distinguishing feature of a person or thing, a part of mental or physical behavior. |
| inherent adjective | /ɪnˈhɪəɹənt/ | Naturally as part or consequence of something. |
| relation noun | /ɹɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/ | The manner in which two things may be associated. |
| sole noun | /səʊl/ | The bottom or plantar surface of the foot. |
| perception noun | /pɚˈsɛpʃ(ə)n/ | The organisation, identification and interpretation of sensory information. |
| logical adjective | /ˈlɑd͡ʒɪkəl/ | In agreement with the principles of logic. |
| awareness noun | /əˈwɛɹ.nəs/ | The state or level of consciousness where sense data can be confirmed by an observer. |
| equally adverb | /ˈiːkwəli/ | In an equal manner; in equal shares or proportion; with equal and impartial justice; evenly |
| engage verb | /ɪnˈɡeɪd͡ʒ/ | To engross or hold the attention of; to keep busy or occupied. |
| versus | /ˈvɝsəs/ | Against; in opposition to. |
| habit noun | /ˈhæb.ɪt/ | An action performed on a regular basis. |
| biology noun | /baɪˈɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/ | The study of all life or living matter. |
| scientist noun | /ˈsaɪəntəst/ | One whose activities make use of the scientific method to answer questions regarding the measurable universe. A scientist may be involved in original research… |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| carry away verb | To steal; to take away. |
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | you've had · haven't had |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | people who we · people who allow · people who help |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | is bound · is highly situated |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 23 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, don't, I'm. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: relation /ɹɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, perception /pɚˈsɛpʃ(ə)n/, implication /ˌɪmpləˈkeɪʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: characteristic /ˌkæɹ(ə)ktəˈɹɪstɪk/, biology /baɪˈɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/, enthusiasm /ɪnˈθuziæzəm/, deliberate /dɪˈlɪb.(ə.)ɹət/, realism /ˈɹi.əlɪzəm/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Shadow it sentence by sentence at normal speed, repeating each one until your rhythm matches the speaker.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like rude, interact, characteristic.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.