Shadowing Practice: Identity Crisis: Why Defining Yourself by Your Career Is a Problem - Learn English Speaking with Video
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These days, you can't get anywhere without having a big argument about identity politics.
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I'm this, you're that, I'm a Democrat, you're Republican, I'm a liberal, you're conservative, whatever it happens to be.
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And those sorts of identities are critically important.
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A lot of people in business, they shy away from those identity politics discussions, but they have identity politics all their own.
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They have an identity as a successful person.
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They have an identity that revolves around their excellence in their job.
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Who are you?
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You know, I'm a father and a grandfather, I'm a husband, you know.
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But when people ask me that question, I say I'm a professor at the Harvard Business School.
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Why?
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Because that's my identity.
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Okay, that's a way to identify myself to be sure, but if that's how I see me,
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that's a real problem, isn't it? strips away the really important things that I have in my life.
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For those who see their identity as being a successful professional, specifically successful, that's kind of an identity based on fear, isn't it?
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We all have fears.
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I mean, I have fears.
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It's normal to be afraid of things.
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But a fear of an attack on your identity, that's actually a death fear.
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That's important.
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Only 20% of the population is actually afraid of dying.
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And a lot of people who are really good at what they do, a lot of my students, a lot of the people watching this, they're desperately afraid of failing at work.
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And that leads to a lot of behavior that's not very healthy, as a matter of fact.
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That kind of a stripped down, cardboard cutout version of one's self, which is not good for you, it's not good for your relationships.
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People ask me this all the time who are extremely successful in business, as a matter of fact, who are afraid of failure, and they say, look, I need to get over this, but I don't want to fail.
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What do you recommend?
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I actually have an exercise for that.
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It's called the Maranasati Death Meditation, adapted for professional failure.
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It actually comes from Theravada Buddhism on the southern tier of Asia, of Asia where the Buddhists would practice a contemplation of their own death.
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If you go into a Buddhist monastery in Thailand or Vietnam or Myanmar,
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Sri Lanka, you'll often find that the walls are adorned with photos of corpses in different states of decay.
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And you're like, wow, that's really morbid.
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It's not, it turns out.
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What happens is that the monks and nuns will contemplate those photos and they will look at each one and say, that is me, and that is me.
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And they'll go through this Marnasati, nine-part death meditation, where they contemplate different stages of a body and a body in different states of decomposition.
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They'll say, that's me.
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That's going to be me.
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That's me.
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Why?
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Because they're exposing themselves to the truth of their own mortality such
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that they can transcend it and actually be fully alive right now.
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You see how healthy that is, right?
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Well, for people who are desperately afraid of the death of their identity as a successful person,
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they need to be exposed to that reality as well.
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Because the truth of the matter is, I don't care who's watching this.
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I don't care how successful you are.
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The party's going to finish, man.
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It's not going to last forever.
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And you have to be comfortable with that
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so you can fully be alive and involved in what's going on in your life today.
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Otherwise, you'll be immobilized by the fear of something that paradoxically is the most normal,
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most predictable thing in your whole life.
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Which is that this is going to stop.
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I recommend putting together a little nine-part meditation where you say, starting off saying, I feel like I'm losing my edge at work.
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I don't know.
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You know, my decision making isn't as crisp as it once was.
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And people are starting to notice it.
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Step two might be, people are starting to make remarks about the fact that I'm losing a step.
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Step three might be, I'm thinking the board is starting to talk about my replacement.
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And they're not including me in the discussions.
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Step four is, I'm pretty sure that the end is coming for my career.
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I'm pretty sure.
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I don't want it to come, but I'm pretty sure it's coming.
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Step five is, I've just gotten the word that I have to retire, even though it's not what I wanted to do.
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Step six might be, yeah, I kind of got forced out.
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And the worst part is, I don't think people remember me for what I used to do.
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They just think of me as the guy who got, they got forced out of the job.
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Step seven is, I just went back to my workplace and it's only six months, but a lot of people are new and they didn't know who I am.
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Step eight is I moved away, you know, and now the people that I talk to, they just think of me as a retired person.
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They don't even ask about what I used to do.
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And step nine might be most days I don't even think about what I used to do.
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I'm just living a different life at this point.
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Now, I realize that sounds really negative, but it isn't.
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But it isn't.
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It's normal.
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Think about those things for two minutes each.
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Do that for three weeks and you'll be a different person.
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Why?
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Not because you failed.
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That's not even failure, by the way.
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It's normal life.
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You will no longer be afraid.
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You will no longer be afraid of these things actually happening to you
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because they will have happened to you in your mind.
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They will have happened to you in your heart.
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And you'll be comfortable with the fact that you have a trajectory of your success and the value you're trying to create.
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And when it's over, you're going to submit because that's the only choice.
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And then, then you'll be at peace.
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Everybody needs to manage their own life like a project and understand that your skills and interests are going to change.
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To do things on purpose, to recognize that the good times are not going to last forever
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and you have to engineer new good times under different circumstances.
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That's now what I talk about with people who are getting older
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and that's the advice I'm taking for myself and I don't know.
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I'm actually at peace for the first time in a long time.
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Bu dersin kelimeleri ve konuşma notları
Bu videoda gölgeleme çalışması için 93 cümle ve 1119 kelime var. Konuşma bölümü 6:14 sürüyor. Konuşmacı dakikada yaklaşık 179 kelimeyle, günlük konuşmaya yakın doğal bir hızda konuşuyor. Kelimelerin %87’i İngilizcede en sık kullanılan 3.000 kelime arasında, bu yüzden kelime dağarcığını takip etmek kolay.
Bu videodaki önemli kelimeler
Videodan daha az kullanılan 15 kelime, telaffuzu ve anlamıyla:
- strip /ˈstɹɪp/ (fiil) — striptiz yapmak. To remove or take away, often in strips or stripes.
- expose /ɪkˈspoʊz/ (fiil) — açığa çıkarmak. To reveal; to uncover; to make visible; to bring to light.
- skill /skɪl/ (isim) — beceri, maharet. A capacity to do something well; a technique, an ability, usually acquired or learned, as opposed to abilities that are regarded as innate.
- grandfather /ˈɡɹæn(d)ˌfɑðɚ/ (isim) — dede, büyükbaba. A father of someone's parent.
- tier /ˈtɪɚ/ (isim) — tabaka. A row or range, especially one at a higher or lower level than another.
- workplace /ˈwɝkˌpleɪs/ (isim) — iş yeri. The place where someone works.
- adapt /əˈdæpt/ (fiil) — uydurmak, adapte etmek. To make suitable; to make to correspond; to fit or suit.
- monk /mʌŋk/ (isim) — rahip, ruhban. A male member of a monastic order who has devoted his life for religious service.
- mortality /mɔɹˈtælɪti/ (isim) — ölümlülük. The state of being susceptible to death.
- predictable /pɹəˈdɪktəbləl/ (sıfat) — öngörülebilir. Able to be predicted.
- cardboard /ˈkɑɹdˌbɔɹd/ (isim) — karton, mukavva. A wood-based material resembling heavy paper, used in the manufacture of boxes, cartons and signs.
- circumstance /ˈsɝ.kəmˌstæns/ (isim) — durum, hâl. Something which is related to, or in some way affects, a fact or event.
- monastery /ˈmɑnəˌstɛɹi/ (isim) — manastır, keşişhane. A residence for monks or others who have taken religious vows.
- nun /nʌn/ (isim) — rahibe. A member of a Christian religious community of women who live by certain vows and usually wear a habit, (Roman Catholicism, specifically) those living together…
- trajectory /tɹəˈd͡ʒɛktəɹi/ (isim) — yörünge. The path an object takes as it moves.
Duyacağınız deyimsel fiiller
- get over (fiil) — üstesinden gelmek, yenmek. To overcome.
- look at (fiil) — bakmak. To observe or watch.
- put together (fiil) — birleştirmek, bir araya getirmek. To assemble, construct, build, or formulate.
Dikkat edilecek telaffuzlar
Konuşmacı I'm, don't, you're gibi kısaltılmış biçimleri 48 kez kullanıyor. Bunları duyduğunuz gibi kısa söyleyin.
- “sh” ve “zh” sesleri: meditation /mɛdɪˈteɪʃn̩/, contemplation /ˌkɑntəmˈpleɪʃən/, decomposition /diːˌkɒmpəˈzɪʃən/
- Uzun kelimeler — vurguyu doğru yere koyun: desperately /ˈdɛs.p(ə.)ɹət.li/, mortality /mɔɹˈtælɪti/, critically /ˈkɹɪt.ɪ.kə.li/, predictable /pɹəˈdɪktəbləl/, monastery /ˈmɑnəˌstɛɹi/
Bu videoyla nasıl çalışılır
- Videonun tamamını konuşmadan bir kez dinleyin ve bilmediğiniz kelimeleri not edin.
- 0,75× hızla başlayın, cümle cümle tekrar edin ve kolaylaşınca normal hıza dönün.
- Kendinizi kaydedin ve orijinaliyle karşılaştırın; strip, expose, skill gibi kelimelere özellikle dikkat edin.
Bu videodaki dil bilgisi
Konuşmacının en çok kullandığı yapılar, videodaki sözcüklerin aynısıyla:
| Yapı | Videoda |
|---|---|
| “Used to” used to + fiil — artık geçerli olmayan eski bir alışkanlık ya da durum | used to do |
| İlgi cümlecikleri who / which + cümle — bir kişi ya da şey hakkında ek bilgi | those who see · people who are · self, which is |
| Edilgen yapı be + fiilin üçüncü hâli — kimin yaptığı değil, ne olduğu önemli | are adorned · be exposed · be immobilized |
Gölgeleme Tekniği Nedir?
Gölgeleme, başlangıçta profesyonel tercüman eğitimi için geliştirilen ve çok dilli Dr. Alexander Arguelles tarafından popüler hale getirilen, bilim destekli bir dil öğrenme tekniğidir. Yöntem basit ama güçlüdür: ana dili İngilizce olan bir sesi dinler ve hemen yüksek sesle tekrar edersiniz — konuşmacıyı 1-2 saniye gecikmeyle takip eden bir gölge gibi. Pasif dinleme veya dilbilgisi alıştırmalarının aksine, gölgeleme beyninizi ve ağız kaslarınızı gerçek konuşma kalıplarını eşzamanlı olarak işlemeye ve yeniden üretmeye zorlar. Araştırmalar, telaffuz doğruluğu, tonlama, ritim, bağlı konuşma, dinleme anlama ve konuşma akıcılığını önemli ölçüde geliştirdiğini göstermektedir — bu da onu IELTS Konuşma hazırlığı ve gerçek dünya İngilizce iletişimi için en etkili yöntemlerden biri yapar.