シャドーイング練習: Why We Go Cold On Our Partners - 動画で英語スピーキングを学ぶ

練習モードを選ぶ

各モードは全画面の練習ルームで開きます。

63 文

文が短すぎたり長すぎる場合は、Editをタップして調整してください。

The story of the path to coldness in love is well known.

We start off full of affection for one another and then, with time, feelings fade.

We start prioritising work.

We check our phones while they're speaking.

We don't especially want to hear how their day went.

There's a popular surface explanation for this kind of emotional frost.

That people naturally get bored of one another in the same

way as they get bored with everything else – the gadget that once seemed so amazing, the film they used to love.

Going cold is, in this story, simply the unavoidable consequence of familiarity.

But there's another explanation, darker at first, but in the end more hopeful.

The loss of interest isn't either natural or inevitable.

The boredom is something at once more complicated and more active.

It exists because we feel hurt by,

angry with or scared of our partner and because we haven't found a cathartic way to tell ourselves or them about it.

Tuning out isn't inevitable, it's a symptom of disavowed emotional distress.

It's a way of coping.

We're internally numbed, not just a touch board.

This can sound strange.

After all, we might have no active sense that our partner has been hurting, angering or frightening us.

The idea appears laughable or extreme.

It makes our partner sound like monsters or ourselves like weaklings, neither of which is true.

But the self that loves within a relationship is not the normal adult self we know from other zones of our lives.

We may mostly be hugely resourceful and resilient, but the person who loves is an infinitely more vulnerable being.

We should imagine it like a smaller, younger, more defenseless version of ourselves that lives in our heads

and is no tougher and not much wiser than we were as babies,

which is when so many of our needs for and ideas about love were formed.

It's this vulnerable self that continues to direct our hearts, even if we're six foot two with a pointy beard.

The loving self has a gossamer -thin ego.

It gets hurt, frightened and upset with desperate ease.

You could deeply distress it by interrupting it during a story it's telling you about the sandwich it had for lunch,

by not asking it enough about the little spot it got on its arm yesterday, by preferring a book to cuddling,

or being a bit tricky about what channel it should watch on TV.

Of course, these are, by ordinary adult standards, tiny slights.

But we don't love by adult standards.

These small arrows are enough to wound the self that loves to its tender emotional core.

Ideally, of course, the small self would at once point out what's happened.

It would carefully explain that it had been frustrated and hurt.

Its voice would be measured, undefensive, and charming.

But mostly, it just stays silent.

That's forgivable.

It doesn't properly understand what's wrong.

It just knows it's in pain and is driven by an instinct to withdraw and protect itself, which translates into behavior that looks pretty cold.

If the adult self had to give voice to the loving self's upset, it could sound and feel absurd, which is partly why it doesn't.

There can be something especially humiliating in having to say, I don't feel you took enough interest in the details of my lunch break,

or I'm 45 years old but not capable of sharing a TV remote control.

These truly are small issues for an adult to dwell on,

but the parts of us that make themselves vulnerable in love don't obey the ordinary adult rules.

The consequence is that the loving self dries up.

It doesn't want to have sex.

It gets sarcastic and irritable.

But it doesn't even know why it's like this.

It isn't putting on an act.

It's confused.

To learn to cope, we need a prominent mutual awareness

and forgiveness of this dynamic of sensitivity and distress and a commitment to decode it when disengagement and indifference descend.

We have to create a forum in which so -called minor love -sapping hurts can safely be aired,

without the other dismissing, as they always so easily can, the issues at stake as childish or imagined.

The touchiness of the loving self is ridiculous, if judged by the more robust standards of the rest of life.

But this is not the rest of life.

When we've gone cold, we may not truly have lost interest in our partners we might just need an opportunity to imagine

that we are quietly really rather hurt and furious with them.

And we should have access to a safe forum in which our tender but critical feelings can be aired, purged and understood without risk of humiliation.

Thank you.

アプリをダウンロード

流暢に話すために必要なすべて

AI発音採点文ごとに採点

IPA練習すべての音をマスター

単語学習自分の単語帳を作る

単語ゲーム遊びながら覚える

QRをスキャン

Download on theApp Store Get it onGoogle Play

同じチャンネル

FOR YOU

このレッスンの語彙とスピーキングのポイント

このスピーキングレッスンは、動画「Why We Go Cold On Our Partners」を教材にしています。繰り返し出てくる語は次のとおりです：self, adult, hurt, loving, partner。この動画には、シャドーイング用の文が28文、単語が792語あります。音声の長さは4:56です。話す速さは1分あたり約161語で、日常会話に近い自然なペースです。英語の頻出3,000語に含まれる単語は80%だけなので、語彙は難しめです。

この動画の重要語彙

動画に出てくる覚えておきたい単語15語を、発音と意味つきで紹介します。

単語	発音	意味
vulnerable 形容詞	/ˈvʌln(ə)ɹəbl̩/	傷つきやすい, 脆い
bore 動詞	/boɹ/	いらいらさせる
explanation 名詞	/ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/	説明
ordinary 形容詞	/ˈɔɹdɪnɛɹi/	通常な, 普通な
forum 名詞	/ˈfɔːɹəm/	論壇, フォーラム
tender 形容詞	/ˈtɛn.dɚ/	過敏
inevitable 形容詞	/ɪˈnɛvɪtəbəl/	不可避の, 避けられない
consequence 名詞	/ˈkɑn.sɪ.kwəns/	結果
naturally 副詞	/ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/	勿論
complicated 形容詞	/ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/	複雑な
thin 形容詞	/ˈθɪn/	薄い, 細い
carefully 副詞	/ˈkɛɹf(ə)li/	じっくり, 慎重に
ridiculous 形容詞	/ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/	馬鹿らしい
silent 形容詞	/ˈsaɪ̯lənt/	静かな, 無音の
awareness 名詞	/əˈwɛɹ.nəs/	意識

動画に出てくる句動詞

単語	意味
point out 動詞	指す, 指し示す

この動画の文法

話し手がよく使っている文型を、動画の実際の表現とともに紹介します。

文型	動画での表現
受動態 be + 過去分詞 — 誰がするかより、何が起きるかに焦点を当てる	were formed · had been frustrated · would be measured
現在完了形 have/has + 過去分詞 — 過去の出来事が今も関係している	haven't found · we've gone
関係詞節 who / which + 節 — 人や物について情報を加える	person who loves · absurd, which is

注意したい発音

話し手はdoesn't, don't, isn'tなど、短縮形や弱形を18回使っています。聞こえたとおりの短い形で発音しましょう。

「th」の音: thin /ˈθɪn/, withdraw /wɪðˈdɹɔ/
「sh」と「zh」の音: explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, affection /əˈfɛk.ʃən/, childish /ˈt͡ʃaɪldɪʃ/, humiliation /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/
長い単語（アクセントの位置に注意）: explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, ordinary /ˈɔɹdɪnɛɹi/, inevitable /ɪˈnɛvɪtəbəl/, naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/

日本語話者が苦手な音：

/r/ と /l/ の区別 — /l/ は舌先を歯茎につけ、/r/ はどこにもつけない: vulnerable /ˈvʌln(ə)ɹəbl̩/, naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, carefully /ˈkɛɹf(ə)li/, ridiculous /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/, partly /ˈpɑɹtli/
/v/ — /b/ にならないように、上の歯を下唇に当てる: vulnerable /ˈvʌln(ə)ɹəbl̩/, inevitable /ɪˈnɛvɪtəbəl/, sensitivity /ˌsɛn.səˈtɪv.ə.ti/, forgiveness /fɚˈɡɪvnəs/, disavow /dɪsəˈvaʊ/
/f/ — 「フ」ではなく、上の歯と下唇で出す: forum /ˈfɔːɹəm/, confused /kənˈfjuːzd/, carefully /ˈkɛɹf(ə)li/, safely /ˈseɪfli/, furious /ˈfjʊəɹi.əs/

この動画での練習方法

まず声を出さずに動画を最後まで聞き、知らない単語をメモします。
まず0.75倍速で一文ずつシャドーイングし、慣れてきたら通常の速度に戻します。
自分の声を録音して元の音声と比べます。vulnerable, bore, explanationなどの単語に特に注意しましょう。

シャドーイングとは？英語上達に効果的な理由

シャドーイング（Shadowing）は、もともとプロの通訳者養成プログラムで開発された言語学習法で、多言語習得者として知られるDr. Alexander Arguelles によって広く普及されました。方法はシンプルですが非常に効果的：ネイティブスピーカーの英語を聞きながら、1〜2秒の遅延で声に出してすぐに繰り返す——まるで「影（shadow）」のように話者を追いかけます。文法ドリルや受動的なリスニングと異なり、シャドーイングは脳と口の筋肉が同時にリアルタイムで英語を処理・再現することを強制します。研究により、発音精度、抑揚、リズム、連音、リスニング力、そして会話の流暢さが大幅に向上することが確認されています。IELTSスピーキング対策や自然な英語コミュニケーションを目指す方に特におすすめです。

シャドーイングのやり方: ステップ別の完全ガイドを読む →

シャドーイング練習: Why We Go Cold On Our Partners - 動画で英語スピーキングを学ぶ

練習モードを選ぶ

アプリをダウンロード

Why Unloved People Hate Themselves #shorts #selfcare

Why Love NEVER Lasts FOREVER

Why Socrates Hated Democracy

PLATO ON: The Allegory of the Cave

PHILOSOPHY - Schopenhauer

Why Parents Bully Their Children

The Secret to a Calm Life

PHILOSOPHY - Plato

Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood

LITERATURE - Charles Darwin

How to Get Over Someone

The Point of Travel

POLITICAL THEORY - Karl Marx

When Love Isn't Easy

How To Get Over Rejection

How to Parent Yourself

PHILOSOPHY - The Stoics

Why We Should Refuse to Get Into Arguments

Who Am I?

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Fawning: The Survival Strategy That Turns Into Self-Abandonment | Fawning #2

Why Do We Stay in Relationships That Hurt Us?

The love You Attract Reveals Who You Are | Carl Jung

Why We Can't Save Those We Love

love without attachment

How To Rewire Your Brain | Andrew Huberman Motivation

6 Telltale Signs You're Feeling Numb

How Your Childhood Influence The Way You Express Love (love styles)

Sexuality Professor Answers Dating Questions | Tech Support | WIRED

this is enough.