Shadowing Practice: How to Parent Yourself - Learn English Speaking with Video
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All of us were parented.
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For many of us, it went well.
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We were loved, our views were respected, our needs were tended to.
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It helped to make us the more or less sane people we are now.
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But for others among us, things went really rather badly wrong.
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Perhaps there was unreliability, anger, humiliation, violence or worse.
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If there was, we're liable to have been deeply marked.
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We may, even if it all happened quite a number of years ago now, keep noticing new ways in which the past is getting in the way of a good life in the present.
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Our inadequate parenting experiences undermine our ability to have sound relationships,
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the right sort of confidence and to extend adequate nurture to ourselves.
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We would like, of course, to move on.
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There is something unbalanced and deeply cruel in the idea of the first 12 years determining the next 50.
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We cannot change the past, but it does remain open to us to correct at least some of its repercussions.
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We may learn to do this through a neglected and yet deeply powerful process we call re-parenting.
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How our parents behaved will have laid down a template in our minds about how we should respond to challenges.
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But we don't need to remain forever stuck with the kind of care which we imbibed in the early years.
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We by nature have an ability to parent ourselves.
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What this means is an ability to comfort ourselves at moments of difficulty, to interpret the troubles that beset us with imagination and kindness,
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to encourage ourselves in the face of anxiety and loss, and to reassure the more fragile,
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agitated parts of us by drawing upon our experience and our serene aspects.
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All this is what good parents naturally do for their children.
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But if this didn't happen to us, we can still, in adulthood, step in and do it for ourselves.
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One part of the mind can speak to the other.
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One part can act as the sane, resilient counterweight to the bruised and more immature side of the self.
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We can figuratively put an arm around our own shoulder.
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Our experience of the shortfalls of our own parents offer us an expertise
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that is wasted if it stays stuck at the level of just criticism.
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It should become the template for a far more useful project, the creation of an inner ideal parent,
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who acts in all the ways in which the real thing should have done but didn't quite.
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Knowing so much about what we did not have enables us to be experts at what we need
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and should believe we can provide for ourselves.
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We already have the perfect inner parent.
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It's simply in many ways the opposite of the one we had.
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Though childhood is a one-off event in material time, in psychological time it's endlessly recurring.
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The eight-year-old us is still there, and we can talk to it and respond to it in a way
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that allows it to mature and strengthen in the way it always should have done.
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We can dare to make use of a much underestimated capacity – that of re-parenting ourselves.
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If you liked this film, please subscribe to our channel and click the bell icon to turn on notifications.
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Follow the link on your screen now to see our range of books, games and gifts all about self-knowledge.
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Bu dersin kelimeleri ve konuşma notları
Bu C1 seviyesindeki konuşma dersi “How to Parent Yourself” videosuna dayanıyor. En çok tekrarlanan kelimeler: ourselves, parent, parenting, deeply, ability. Bu videoda gölgeleme çalışması için 39 cümle ve 572 kelime var. Konuşma bölümü 3:35 sürüyor. Konuşmacı dakikada yaklaşık 160 kelimeyle, günlük konuşmaya yakın doğal bir hızda konuşuyor. Kelimelerin %86’i İngilizcede en sık kullanılan 3.000 kelime arasında; geri kalanına başlamadan önce bakmakta fayda var.
Bu videodaki önemli kelimeler
Videodaki en ileri düzey 15 kelime, telaffuzu ve anlamıyla:
| Kelime | Telaffuz | Anlam |
|---|---|---|
| template isim | /ˈtɛm.plɪt/ | şablon, kalıp |
| agitate fiil | /ˈæ.d͡ʒɪ.teɪt/ | sarsmak |
| bruise isim | /bɹuz/ | morluk, morartı |
| counterweight isim | denge ağırlığı | |
| figuratively zarf | mecazen | |
| repercussion isim | /ˌɹiː.pəˈkʌʃ.ən/ | yankı, yansıma |
| resilient sıfat | /ɹɪˈzɪl.jənt/ | dirençli, elastik |
| humiliation isim | /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/ | aşağılama, küçük düşürme |
| adulthood isim | yetişkinlik | |
| undermine fiil | /ˌʌn.dɚˈmaɪn/ | baltalamak |
| underestimate fiil | /ʌndɚˈɛs.tɪ.meɪt/ | azımsamak, hafife almak |
| inadequate sıfat | /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/ | yetersiz, az |
| fragile sıfat | /ˈfɹæd͡ʒəl/ | kırılgan, narin |
| notification isim | /ˌnoʊtɪfɪˈkeɪʃn̩/ | bildirme, bilgilendirme |
| kindness isim | /ˈkaɪnd.nəs/ | incelik, kibarlık |
Dikkat edilecek telaffuzlar
Konuşmacı didn't, don't, we're gibi kısaltılmış biçimleri 4 kez kullanıyor. Bunları duyduğunuz gibi kısa söyleyin.
- “sh” ve “zh” sesleri: reassure /ˌɹi.əˈʃʊɹ/, repercussion /ˌɹiː.pəˈkʌʃ.ən/, humiliation /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/, notification /ˌnoʊtɪfɪˈkeɪʃn̩/
- Uzun kelimeler — vurguyu doğru yere koyun: repercussion /ˌɹiː.pəˈkʌʃ.ən/, humiliation /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/, underestimate /ʌndɚˈɛs.tɪ.meɪt/, inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, notification /ˌnoʊtɪfɪˈkeɪʃn̩/
Türkçe konuşanların zorlandığı sesler:
- /w/ — dudaklar yuvarlak, /v/ değil: inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, adequate /ˈæd.ə.kwɪt/
- Kelime başındaki ünsüz kümesi — araya ünlü eklemeyin: bruise /bɹuz/, humiliation /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/, fragile /ˈfɹæd͡ʒəl/, strengthen /ˈstɹɛŋ(k)θən/
- /æ/ — “e”den daha açık: agitate /ˈæ.d͡ʒɪ.teɪt/, inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, fragile /ˈfɹæd͡ʒəl/, adequate /ˈæd.ə.kwɪt/
Bu videoyla nasıl çalışılır
- Videonun tamamını konuşmadan bir kez dinleyin ve bilmediğiniz kelimeleri not edin.
- 0,75× hızla başlayın, cümle cümle tekrar edin ve kolaylaşınca normal hıza dönün.
- Kendinizi kaydedin ve orijinaliyle karşılaştırın; template, agitate, bruise gibi kelimelere özellikle dikkat edin.
Gölgeleme Tekniği Nedir?
Gölgeleme, başlangıçta profesyonel tercüman eğitimi için geliştirilen ve çok dilli Dr. Alexander Arguelles tarafından popüler hale getirilen, bilim destekli bir dil öğrenme tekniğidir. Yöntem basit ama güçlüdür: ana dili İngilizce olan bir sesi dinler ve hemen yüksek sesle tekrar edersiniz — konuşmacıyı 1-2 saniye gecikmeyle takip eden bir gölge gibi. Pasif dinleme veya dilbilgisi alıştırmalarının aksine, gölgeleme beyninizi ve ağız kaslarınızı gerçek konuşma kalıplarını eşzamanlı olarak işlemeye ve yeniden üretmeye zorlar. Araştırmalar, telaffuz doğruluğu, tonlama, ritim, bağlı konuşma, dinleme anlama ve konuşma akıcılığını önemli ölçüde geliştirdiğini göstermektedir — bu da onu IELTS Konuşma hazırlığı ve gerçek dünya İngilizce iletişimi için en etkili yöntemlerden biri yapar.