Prática de Shadowing: Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood - Aprenda a falar inglês com vídeo
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Let's imagine you had a bad childhood.
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You may hardly remember it.
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It almost doesn't matter.
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The easiest way to assess what once went on is to reflect on how you feel about yourself now.
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The clearest sign of having had a miserable start is a deep self-hatred.
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You think you're ugly.
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You can't bear to look in mirrors.
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You never want to upset anyone and suspect everyone hates you.
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You feel unacceptable and weird and just in multiple non-specific ways.
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Diseased and not right.
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Behind such feelings there will have been the normal villains.
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A critical and unloving mother or father.
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Some violence and unpredictability.
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Huge preference for a sibling.
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There are only so many ways these sorts of wounds form.
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But the real legacy comes in love.
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Here, after the normal awful adolescence, eating disorders, cutting, alienation, drink, etc. you have two options.
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Firstly, to fall in love with cruel, distant, possibly violent, intermittent, unavailable people.
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You can fall in love with people who are married to someone else or who don't call you, who make you feel inadequate and unseen and constantly alarmed and unsure.
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You can love people who think you're unlovable.
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Or else, you can love people who really like you, who think you're attractive and sweet and clever and you can feel powerfully ill around them.
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You can become an expert in identifying what's wrong with them.
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They're not clever enough, they're weird, they've got no options.
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You criticise their taste in shoes, the shape of their mouth, a comment they made at a party.
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You become as critical of them as your parents were once critical of you.
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How could someone who liked you be anything other than a loser?
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You end up pushing them away, maybe not directly, but by going slightly cold or flirting with strangers.
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You know well enough how to detonate trust conclusively.
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This rigmarole can go on for most of your life.
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Unavailable, cruel people and sickeningly available ones.
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And in the in-between times, devastating loneliness.
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It's been going on forever.
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You can be sure this sort of thing went on in Renaissance Florence and Ming Dynasty Beijing.
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Is there any way out?
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There is, perhaps, just a third option.
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To understand what's going on and to share it with someone who is kind
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and perceptive and who might have problems of their own and a good therapist.
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To meet someone who threatens to make us feel sick with their sweetness, then to explain to them what we understand of our problem.
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Rather than pretending that we are healthy and can bear their kindness without difficulty, we may be able to tell them, I want so much to be normal,
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I want so much to tolerate kindness, but I have an illness.
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My past means I can't accept love, I can't digest it, I turn against it and the person giving it to me.
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But I don't want to be like this anymore.
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I'm tired of sabotaging relationships and turning away good people.
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Please help me to bear the anxiety of being cared for.
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Please help me to absorb the love I crave.
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Please forgive me for being unwell.
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If the person doesn't immediately run away, if they can see the decency behind the shame and the tenderness behind the neurosis,
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if they can partly understand our problem from the inside, we will be making momentous progress.
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We won't be healed yet, but at least we'll know how ill we are
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and will have found a way to hint at the scale of our terrors of kindness.
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Vocabulário e dicas de fala para esta lição
Esta aula de conversação de nível C1 usa o vídeo “Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood”. As palavras que mais se repetem: kindness, bear, option, critical, normal. Este vídeo tem 50 frases e 602 palavras para praticar shadowing. A fala dura 3:25. O falante fala em ritmo natural, cerca de 176 palavras por minuto, próximo de uma conversa do dia a dia. 83% das palavras estão entre as 3.000 mais comuns do inglês; vale a pena estudar o restante antes de começar.
Vocabulário principal deste vídeo
As 15 palavras mais avançadas do vídeo, com pronúncia e significado:
| Palavra | Pronúncia | Significado |
|---|---|---|
| kindness substantivo | /ˈkaɪnd.nəs/ | gentileza |
| unavailable adjetivo | /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/ | indisponível |
| adolescence substantivo | /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/ | adolescência |
| alienation substantivo | /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/ | alienação, alheamento |
| conclusively advérbio | conclusivamente | |
| detonate verbo | /ˈdɛtəneɪt/ | detonar, explodir |
| devastate verbo | /ˈdɛv.ə.steɪt/ | devastar |
| intermittent adjetivo | /ˌɪntɚˈmɪtn̩t/ | intermitente |
| momentous adjetivo | /moʊˈmɛn.təs/ | momentoso, capital |
| perceptive adjetivo | /pɚˈsɛptɪv/ | perspicaz, perceptivo |
| powerfully advérbio | /ˈpaʊɚf(ə)li/ | poderosamente |
| rigmarole substantivo | /ˈɹɪɡməɹoʊl/ | lengalenga |
| sweetness substantivo | /ˈswitnəs/ | doçura |
| tenderness substantivo | /ˈtɛn.dɚ.nɪs/ | ternura |
| unlove substantivo | desamor |
Phrasal verbs que você vai ouvir
| Palavra | Significado |
|---|---|
| end up verbo | terminar, acabar |
| run away verbo | fugir |
Frases que vale a pena repetir
Frases curtas e completas do vídeo que você pode usar na conversa do dia a dia:
- Let's imagine you had a bad childhood.
- You can't bear to look in mirrors.
- You can love people who think you're unlovable.
- How could someone who liked you be anything other than a loser?
Gramática neste vídeo
As estruturas que o falante mais usa, com as palavras exatas do vídeo:
| Estrutura | No vídeo |
|---|---|
| Orações relativas who / which + oração — informação extra sobre uma pessoa ou coisa | people who are · people who think · people who really |
| Voz passiva be + particípio passado — o foco está no que acontece, não em quem faz | being cared · won't be healed |
Pronúncia para ficar de olho
O falante usa 16 contrações e formas reduzidas, como can't, you're, doesn't. Diga-as na forma curta, do jeito que você ouve.
- Os sons de “th”: threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, therapist /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/
- Os sons de “sh” e “zh”: alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, sabotage /ˈsæb.əˌtɑʒ/
- Palavras longas — acerte a sílaba tônica: unavailable /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/, alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, unacceptable /ˌʌn.ækˈsɛp.tə.bl̩/
Sons difíceis para falantes de português:
- Consoante final — sem acrescentar um “i” depois: detonate /ˈdɛtəneɪt/, devastate /ˈdɛv.ə.steɪt/, intermittent /ˌɪntɚˈmɪtn̩t/, flirt /flɚt/, digest /daɪˈd͡ʒɛst/
- /l/ final — a língua toca o céu da boca, não vira “u”: unavailable /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/, rigmarole /ˈɹɪɡməɹoʊl/, unwell /ʌnˈwɛl/, miserable /ˈmɪz(ə)ɹəbəl/
- /h/ — um sopro suave, diferente do “r”: hatred /ˈheɪtɹɪd/, hint /hɪnt/
Como praticar com este vídeo
- Ouça o vídeo inteiro uma vez sem falar e anote as palavras que você não conhece.
- Comece na velocidade 0,75×, faça shadowing frase por frase e volte à velocidade normal quando ficar fácil.
- Grave a sua voz e compare com o original, prestando atenção a palavras como kindness, unavailable, adolescence.
O que é a Técnica de Shadowing?
Shadowing é uma técnica de aprendizado de idiomas com base científica, originalmente desenvolvida para o treinamento de intérpretes profissionais. O método é simples, mas poderoso: você ouve áudio em inglês nativo e repete imediatamente em voz alta — como uma sombra seguindo o falante com 1-2 segundos de atraso. Pesquisas mostram melhora significativa na precisão da pronúncia, entonação, ritmo, sons conectados, compreensão auditiva e fluência na fala.