跟读练习: Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood - 通过视频学习英语口语

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Let's imagine you had a bad childhood.

我们来假设你有一段不幸的童年。

You may hardly remember it.

你可能几乎不记得了。

It almost doesn't matter.

这几乎无关紧要。

The easiest way to assess what once went on is to reflect on how you feel about yourself now.

The clearest sign of having had a miserable start is a deep self-hatred.

You think you're ugly.

You can't bear to look in mirrors.

You never want to upset anyone and suspect everyone hates you.

You feel unacceptable and weird and just in multiple non-specific ways.

Diseased and not right.

Behind such feelings there will have been the normal villains.

A critical and unloving mother or father.

Some violence and unpredictability.

Huge preference for a sibling.

There are only so many ways these sorts of wounds form.

But the real legacy comes in love.

Here, after the normal awful adolescence, eating disorders, cutting, alienation, drink, etc. you have two options.

Firstly, to fall in love with cruel, distant, possibly violent, intermittent, unavailable people.

You can fall in love with people who are married to someone else or who don't call you, who make you feel inadequate and unseen and constantly alarmed and unsure.

You can love people who think you're unlovable.

Or else, you can love people who really like you, who think you're attractive and sweet and clever and you can feel powerfully ill around them.

You can become an expert in identifying what's wrong with them.

They're not clever enough, they're weird, they've got no options.

You criticise their taste in shoes, the shape of their mouth, a comment they made at a party.

You become as critical of them as your parents were once critical of you.

How could someone who liked you be anything other than a loser?

You end up pushing them away, maybe not directly, but by going slightly cold or flirting with strangers.

You know well enough how to detonate trust conclusively.

This rigmarole can go on for most of your life.

Unavailable, cruel people and sickeningly available ones.

And in the in-between times, devastating loneliness.

It's been going on forever.

You can be sure this sort of thing went on in Renaissance Florence and Ming Dynasty Beijing.

Is there any way out?

There is, perhaps, just a third option.

To understand what's going on and to share it with someone who is kind

and perceptive and who might have problems of their own and a good therapist.

To meet someone who threatens to make us feel sick with their sweetness, then to explain to them what we understand of our problem.

Rather than pretending that we are healthy and can bear their kindness without difficulty, we may be able to tell them, I want so much to be normal,

I want so much to tolerate kindness, but I have an illness.

My past means I can't accept love, I can't digest it, I turn against it and the person giving it to me.

But I don't want to be like this anymore.

I'm tired of sabotaging relationships and turning away good people.

Please help me to bear the anxiety of being cared for.

Please help me to absorb the love I crave.

Please forgive me for being unwell.

If the person doesn't immediately run away, if they can see the decency behind the shame and the tenderness behind the neurosis,

if they can partly understand our problem from the inside, we will be making momentous progress.

We won't be healed yet, but at least we'll know how ill we are

and will have found a way to hint at the scale of our terrors of kindness.

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本课的词汇与口语要点

这节 C1 级别的口语课以视频“Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood”为素材。视频中反复出现的词有：kindness, bear, option, critical, normal。这段视频共有 50 个句子、602 个单词可供跟读。讲话部分时长为 3:25。说话人语速自然，每分钟约 176 个词，接近日常对话。 83% 的单词属于英语最常用的 3,000 词，其余的词建议在练习前先学一下。

视频中的重点词汇

视频中最难的 15 个单词，附发音和释义：

单词	发音	释义
kindness 名词	/ˈkaɪnd.nəs/	恩惠, 仁慈
unavailable 形容词	/ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/	不可用
adolescence 名词	/ˌædəˈlɛsəns/	青少年
alienation 名词	/ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/	疏離 /疏离
detonate 动词	/ˈdɛtəneɪt/	爆炸
devastate 动词	/ˈdɛv.ə.steɪt/	摧毀 /摧毁, 破壞 /破坏
intermittent 形容词	/ˌɪntɚˈmɪtn̩t/	斷斷續續 /断断续续
sweetness 名词	/ˈswitnəs/	甜味
unpredictability 名词		變化莫測 /变化莫测, 出乎意料
unwell 形容词	/ʌnˈwɛl/	不舒服
decency 名词	/ˈdiːsənsi/	體統 /体统, 規矩 /规矩
sibling 名词	/ˈsɪb.lɪŋ/	兄弟姐妹, 兄弟
sabotage 名词	/ˈsæb.əˌtɑʒ/	蓄意破壞 /蓄意破坏, 破壞 /破坏
criticize 动词	/ˈkɹɪtɪsaɪz/	批評 /批评
loneliness 名词	/ˈloʊnlinəs/	寂寞, 孤獨 /孤独

视频中出现的短语动词

单词	释义
end up 动词	到达
run away 动词	逃跑

值得反复跟读的句子

视频中简短而完整的句子，可以直接用在日常对话里：

Let's imagine you had a bad childhood.
You can't bear to look in mirrors.
You can love people who think you're unlovable.
How could someone who liked you be anything other than a loser?

视频中的语法

说话人最常用的结构，并附上视频中的原话：

结构	视频中的用法
定语从句 who / which + 从句 — 补充说明人或事物	people who are · people who think · people who really
被动语态 be + 过去分词 — 强调发生了什么，而不是谁做的	being cared · won't be healed

需要注意的发音

说话人用了 16 次缩略和弱读形式，例如 can't, you're, doesn't。请按听到的简短形式来说。

“th” 音: threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, therapist /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/
“sh” 和 “zh” 音: alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, sabotage /ˈsæb.əˌtɑʒ/
长单词——注意重音位置: unavailable /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/, alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, unacceptable /ˌʌn.ækˈsɛp.tə.bl̩/

中文母语者容易读错的音：

/v/ — 不要读成 /w/，上齿轻触下唇: unavailable /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/, devastate /ˈdɛv.ə.steɪt/, perceptive /pɚˈsɛptɪv/, villain /ˈvɪl.ən/
词尾辅音 — 要读清楚，后面不要加元音: kindness /ˈkaɪnd.nəs/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/, detonate /ˈdɛtəneɪt/, devastate /ˈdɛv.ə.steɪt/, intermittent /ˌɪntɚˈmɪtn̩t/
/r/ 和 /l/ 的区别: rigmarole /ˈɹɪɡməɹoʊl/, firstly /ˈfɜɹstli/, tolerate /ˈtɑ.lə.ɹeɪt/, miserable /ˈmɪz(ə)ɹəbəl/

如何用这段视频练习

先完整听一遍视频，不要开口，记下不认识的单词。
先用 0.75 倍速逐句跟读，熟练之后再回到正常速度。
录下自己的声音并与原声对比，特别注意 kindness, unavailable, adolescence 这类单词。

什么是跟读法？

跟读法 (Shadowing) 是一种有科学依据的语言学习技巧，最初开发用于专业口译员的培训，并由多语言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。这个方法简单而强大：您在听英语母语原声的同时立即大声重复——就像是一个延迟1-2秒紧跟说话者的影子。与被动听力或语法练习不同，跟读法强迫您的大脑和口腔肌肉同时处理并模仿真实的讲话模式。研究表明它能显着提高发音准确性，语调，节奏，连读，听力理解和口语流利度——使其成为雅思口语备考和真实英语交流最有效的方法之一。

影子跟读法: 阅读完整分步指南 →

跟读练习: Your Two Options in Love After a Bad Childhood - 通过视频学习英语口语

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