Shadowing Practice: How to Deepen Your Friendships - Learn English Speaking with Video
Ders oluşturuluyor...
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We are inclined to think
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that the secret of great friendship is all about finding someone with whom we mysteriously and wonderfully just click,
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without having to do very much about it.
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But this is arguably an unhelpful stance, because it implies that there is nothing that any of us can do to become better friends.
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Friendship is made to look like a mere happy accident.
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At the School of Life, we think differently.
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We believe that good friendships follow certain principles which can be identified, discussed and taught.
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We firmly believe that we can learn to become better friends and are not any of us born knowing how to be.
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Here then are some of the principles of being a good friend.
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Firstly, asking the right questions.
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We need to learn the art of teasing out of people the bits of themselves that are sincere, vulnerable and true.
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Society tends to encourage us to stay on the surface.
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True friends know how to go deep.
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In order to do so, they ask questions like, How did it feel when X or Y loss occurred?
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They show empathy.
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They say, You must have felt quite sad when...
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They use self -disclosure to encourage others to throw off their masks.
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They might say, I found myself very scared when… Secondly, sincerity.
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Allow space for sadness, regret and melancholy.
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Don't come in with aggressively cheerful, leading questions like, is everything okay then?
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Keep enquiries open.
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Allow room for intimate disclosures.
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Thirdly, silence.
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Don't always speak or interrupt corrupt, allow the other person to unfurl their concerns.
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Fourthly, going deep in you allows them to go deep in themselves.
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People can only go as far with others as they have gone inside themselves.
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A key part of the art of friendship is therefore to know yourself as well as possible, and then to use the data about who you are are,
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as a guide to who others are liable to be.
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We all know that around some people we feel we're boring and have nothing to say.
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This is solely a reflection of how many rooms such people have opened up in their own minds.
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The more they've explored, the more interesting their interlocutors will feel in themselves.
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5. Don't Jabber It can be tempting to talk too much on pet themes.
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Ask yourself with courage, what could another person possibly do with what I propose to tell them? Be ruthless.
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Do they really need to know this?
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Can there be a space in someone else's minds for this, or not so much?
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Sixthly, allow room for weirdness.
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We are all stranger than we're meant to be.
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Know this of yourself and of others, and therefore clear conversational space,
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which will allow space for the odour yet still utterly normal parts of them to assume shape.
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Remember the essential dictum, no one is normal.
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Seventhly, know that everyone is anxious and scared.
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However confident others seem, they are always likely to be inside, close to despair, panic or regret.
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Don't wait for them to tell you this, assume it's true and then just respond accordingly,
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with pre -emptive signs of sympathy and tenderness.
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8. Love in a cold universe We are probably the only things in the universe.
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Out there, it's mostly just gas, rock and silence.
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So, concentrate inside our bonds on conviviality and good humour.
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It's a very strange and tricky business being human, think of how odd it is to have nostrils or elbows.
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So use the alienation and fear of out there to inspire warmth and compassion for ourselves in here.
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Bu dersin kelimeleri ve konuşma notları
Bu B2 seviyesindeki konuşma dersi “How to Deepen Your Friendships” videosuna dayanıyor. En çok tekrarlanan kelimeler: allow, friendship, themselves, space, deep. Bu videoda gölgeleme çalışması için 49 cümle ve 600 kelime var. Konuşma bölümü 4:18 sürüyor. Konuşmacı dakikada yaklaşık 139 kelimelik dengeli bir hızla konuşuyor; gölgeleme için rahat bir tempo. Kelimelerin %83’i İngilizcede en sık kullanılan 3.000 kelime arasında; geri kalanına başlamadan önce bakmakta fayda var.
Bu videodaki önemli kelimeler
Videodaki en ileri düzey 15 kelime, telaffuzu ve anlamıyla:
| Kelime | Telaffuz | Anlam |
|---|---|---|
| scare fiil | /skɛɚ/ | korkutmak |
| alienation isim | /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/ | yabancılaşma |
| interlocutor isim | /ˌɪn.təɹˈlɑk.jə.təɹ/ | muhatap |
| melancholy isim | /ˈmɛl.ənˌkɑ.li/ | melankoli, hüzün |
| nostril isim | /ˈnɒs.tɹɪl/ | burun deliği |
| sincerity isim | /sɪnˈsɛɹəti/ | samimiyet |
| weirdness isim | /ˈwɪɚdnəs/ | gariplik, tuhaflık |
| interrupt fiil | /ˌɪntəˈɹʌpt/ | kesilmek, kesmek |
| aggressively zarf | agresif bir şekilde, agresif | |
| ruthless sıfat | /ˈɹuːθləs/ | acımasız |
| empathy isim | /ˈɛmpəθi/ | empati |
| firstly zarf | /ˈfɜɹstli/ | ilk, önce |
| warmth isim | /wɔɹmθ/ | sıcaklık, sıcaklıklar |
| despair isim | /dɪˈspɛə(ɹ)/ | umutsuzluk |
| imply fiil | /ɪmˈplaɪ/ | gerektirmek, işaret etmek |
Bu videodaki dil bilgisi
Konuşmacının en çok kullandığı yapılar, videodaki sözcüklerin aynısıyla:
| Yapı | Videoda |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + fiilin üçüncü hâli — geçmişte olan ama şimdi de önemli olan bir eylem | have gone · have opened · they've explored |
| Edilgen yapı be + fiilin üçüncü hâli — kimin yaptığı değil, ne olduğu önemli | is made · can be identified |
Dikkat edilecek telaffuzlar
Konuşmacı don't, we're, they've gibi kısaltılmış biçimleri 7 kez kullanıyor. Bunları duyduğunuz gibi kısa söyleyin.
- “th” sesleri: fourthly /ˈfɔːɹθ.li/, thirdly /ˈθɚdli/, ruthless /ˈɹuːθləs/, empathy /ˈɛmpəθi/, warmth /wɔɹmθ/
- “sh” ve “zh” sesleri: disclosure /dɪsˈkləʊʒə(ɹ)/, alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, conversational /ˌkɒnvə(ɹ)ˈseɪʃənəl/, compassion /kəmˈpæʃ.ən/, anxious /ˈæŋkʃəs/
- Uzun kelimeler — vurguyu doğru yere koyun: alienation /ˌeɪli.əˈneɪʃən/, conversational /ˌkɒnvə(ɹ)ˈseɪʃənəl/, conviviality /kənvɪviˈælɪti/, interlocutor /ˌɪn.təɹˈlɑk.jə.təɹ/, melancholy /ˈmɛl.ənˌkɑ.li/
Türkçe konuşanların zorlandığı sesler:
- /w/ — dudaklar yuvarlak, /v/ değil: weirdness /ˈwɪɚdnəs/, wonderfully /wʌn.də(ɹ).fli/, warmth /wɔɹmθ/
- Kelime başındaki ünsüz kümesi — araya ünlü eklemeyin: scare /skɛɚ/, humour /ˈhjuːmɚ/, tricky /ˈtɹɪk.i/, propose /pɹəˈpəʊz/, stance /stæns/
- /æ/ — “e”den daha açık: conviviality /kənvɪviˈælɪti/, sadness /ˈsædnəs/, compassion /kəmˈpæʃ.ən/, stance /stæns/, anxious /ˈæŋkʃəs/
Bu videoyla nasıl çalışılır
- Videonun tamamını konuşmadan bir kez dinleyin ve bilmediğiniz kelimeleri not edin.
- Normal hızda cümle cümle tekrar edin; ritminiz konuşmacıyla aynı olana kadar her cümleyi yineleyin.
- Kendinizi kaydedin ve orijinaliyle karşılaştırın; scare, alienation, interlocutor gibi kelimelere özellikle dikkat edin.
Gölgeleme Tekniği Nedir?
Gölgeleme, başlangıçta profesyonel tercüman eğitimi için geliştirilen ve çok dilli Dr. Alexander Arguelles tarafından popüler hale getirilen, bilim destekli bir dil öğrenme tekniğidir. Yöntem basit ama güçlüdür: ana dili İngilizce olan bir sesi dinler ve hemen yüksek sesle tekrar edersiniz — konuşmacıyı 1-2 saniye gecikmeyle takip eden bir gölge gibi. Pasif dinleme veya dilbilgisi alıştırmalarının aksine, gölgeleme beyninizi ve ağız kaslarınızı gerçek konuşma kalıplarını eşzamanlı olarak işlemeye ve yeniden üretmeye zorlar. Araştırmalar, telaffuz doğruluğu, tonlama, ritim, bağlı konuşma, dinleme anlama ve konuşma akıcılığını önemli ölçüde geliştirdiğini göstermektedir — bu da onu IELTS Konuşma hazırlığı ve gerçek dünya İngilizce iletişimi için en etkili yöntemlerden biri yapar.