Pratica di Shadowing: Why Parents Bully Their Children - Impara a parlare inglese con i video
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What is the most strange and saddest phenomena of psychological life?
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One of the strangest and saddest phenomena of psychological life is that there are parents, too many parents, who end up,
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while sometimes only half realizing it, bullying their own children.
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Why do parents bully their children?
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In short, in order to try to feel better about themselves themselves.
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Because they suffer intensely in the very same area that they are choosing to bully their child in.
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Someone made them feel awful and they surmise,
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by twisted logic, that they will feel better through the process of making their own child feel very bad indeed.
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They aren't doing it personally.
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The child is just collateral damage to a misguided project of healing and an attenuation of symptoms.
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It doesn't make any sense, of course, but But it may actually work for the parent for a time.
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Let's imagine a parent who harbours a terrible fear of being stupid.
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Somewhere in their own past, they were belittled and made to feel hugely inadequate.
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Now a child comes along, their own child, full of the normal hesitations and weaknesses of early infancy.
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Without really realising what they're up to, the parent grows inflamed and incensed by this child's apparent stupidity
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and starts to mock and attack in another person what they fear and hate in themselves.
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It makes them feel a bit better.
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The child becomes a repository of all that they fail to tolerate in themselves.
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They, the child, are the dumb one, so they, the parent, don't have to be.
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They, the child, are the stupid and ugly one, so they, the parent, don't have to be.
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And therefore, the parent is liberated to live more easily within itself self.
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The bad is contained and localised.
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It can't be in them if it's all in little him or her.
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It can take bullied children a very long time to realise that they have even been bullied.
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They don't after all grow up thinking
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that someone else has actually made them feel stupid or made them feel ugly or made them feel soiled,
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let alone their own parent whom they depend on and admire and long to be loved by.
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They simply think that they are stupid, ugly and soiled.
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There is no call for an explanation or a cause.
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Yet, if we are those now grown -up bullied children, we don't need to wonder too much more about what might have happened to us.
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We simply need to take stock of how we feel about ourselves
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and guess that the terrible judgements and sensations that we have about ourselves did not arise spontaneously.
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The feelings we harbour of ourselves are legacies of real occurrences in the world.
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Someone who isn't necessarily owning up to it made us feel a certain way
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and that is why now we are in such pain.
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Typically, those who've been bullied don't look backwards.
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Their illnesses point them relentlessly to the present and the future.
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The bullied anticipate terrible things happening to them that echo events
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that once happened to them but that they don't remember in any way.
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They are causeless paranoiacs, self -haters and warriors.
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Catastrophe is never far away.
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A person feels they're ugly because two decades ago a mother made them feel as such.
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A person feels they've done something very wrong because even further back someone did something very wrong to them.
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The fear contains the imprint of unconscious history.
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We overcome our bullying when we learn to discriminate between what actually belongs to us and what was placed in us.
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Between who we are and what we've been told we are.
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Between how our caregivers like to present themselves and what they've actually done.
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Our triggers and apprehensions lie along the fault lines of our early traumas.
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So they can guide us back to what we suffered through when we are ready to explore.
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We're on our way to overcoming bullying when we can say at last, I'm not ugly, I was made to feel unacceptable.
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I haven't done anything wrong.
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Something wrong was done to me.
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And in general, I am not awful.
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Something awful happened to me.
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Vocabolario e note di pronuncia per questa lezione
Questa lezione di conversazione si basa sul video “Why Parents Bully Their Children”. Le parole che ritornano più spesso: parent, bullied, ugly, themselves, stupid. Questo video contiene 54 frasi e 701 parole da ripetere con lo shadowing. Il parlato dura 4:07. Chi parla ha un ritmo naturale di circa 170 parole al minuto, vicino a una conversazione quotidiana. Il 84% delle parole rientra nelle 3.000 più comuni dell’inglese; conviene studiare le altre prima di iniziare.
Vocaboli chiave di questo video
15 parole del video che vale la pena imparare, con pronuncia e significato:
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| bully sostantivo | /ˈbʊli/ | bullo, spaccone |
| ugly aggettivo | /ˈʌɡli/ | brutto, laido |
| awful aggettivo | /ˈɔːfʊl/ | pessimo, terribile |
| bullying sostantivo | /ˈbʊ.li.ɪŋ/ | bullismo |
| suffer verbo | /ˈsʌfɚ/ | soffrire, penare |
| soil sostantivo | /sɔɪl/ | suolo, terra |
| overcome verbo | /ˌəʊ.vəˈkʌm/ | superare, sconfiggere |
| psychological aggettivo | /ˌsaɪ.kəˈlɑː.d͡ʒɪ.kl̩/ | psicologico |
| phenomenon sostantivo | /fəˈnɒm.ɪ.nən/ | fenomeno |
| necessarily avverbio | /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/ | necessariamente, a tutti i costi |
| explanation sostantivo | /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/ | spiegazione, esplicazione |
| illness sostantivo | /ˈɪl.nəs/ | malattia |
| legacy sostantivo | /ˈlɛɡəsi/ | eredità, lascito |
| apparent aggettivo | /əˈpæɹənt/ | apparente, visibile |
| explore verbo | /ɪkˈsploɹ/ | esplorare, investigare |
I phrasal verb che sentirai
| Parola | Significato |
|---|---|
| grow up verbo | crescere |
| end up verbo | andare a finire, finire |
La grammatica di questo video
Le strutture che chi parla usa di più, con le parole esatte del video:
| Struttura | Nel video |
|---|---|
| Forma passiva be + participio passato — conta ciò che accade, non chi lo fa | were belittled · is liberated · is contained |
| Present perfect have/has + participio passato — un’azione passata che conta ancora adesso | have even been bullied · has actually made · who've been bullied |
Pronuncia a cui fare attenzione
Chi parla usa 19 contrazioni e forme ridotte, come don't, they're, they've. Pronunciale nella forma breve, così come le senti.
- I suoni “sh” e “zh”: explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, unconscious /ˌʌnˈkɑnʃəs/, sensation /sɛnˈseɪʃən/, hesitation /ˌhɛzɪˈteɪʃən/, apprehension /æp.ɹiˈhɛn.ʃən/
- Parole lunghe — attenzione all’accento: psychological /ˌsaɪ.kəˈlɑː.d͡ʒɪ.kl̩/, phenomenon /fəˈnɒm.ɪ.nən/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, explanation /ˌɛkspləˈneɪʃən/, unacceptable /ˌʌn.ækˈsɛp.tə.bl̩/
I suoni difficili per chi parla italiano:
- /h/ — va soffiata, non è muta: heal /ˈhiːl/, hugely /ˈhjuːd͡ʒli/, hesitation /ˌhɛzɪˈteɪʃən/, apprehension /æp.ɹiˈhɛn.ʃən/
- Consonante finale — senza aggiungere una vocale dopo: illness /ˈɪl.nəs/, apparent /əˈpæɹənt/, twist /twɪst/, depend /dɪˈpɛnd/, weakness /ˈwik.nɪs/
- /æ/ — più aperta della “e”: apparent /əˈpæɹənt/, unacceptable /ˌʌn.ækˈsɛp.tə.bl̩/, inadequate /ɪnˈædəkwɪt/, anticipate /ænˈtɪs.ɪ.peɪt/, backward /ˈbækwɚd/
Come esercitarsi con questo video
- Ascolta tutto il video una volta senza parlare e annota le parole che non conosci.
- Inizia a velocità 0,75×, fai shadowing frase per frase e torna alla velocità normale quando diventa facile.
- Registrati e confronta con l’originale, facendo attenzione a parole come bully, ugly, awful.
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.