Shadowing Practice: Why We Should Refuse to Get Into Arguments - Learn English Speaking with Video
בחר מצב תרגול
כל מצב פותח חדר תרגול במסך מלא.
39 משפטים
אם המשפטים קצרים או ארוכים מדי, לחץ על ערוך כדי להתאים אותם.
1
However deep our theoretical commitment to serenity, in the course of an average day,
2
we're likely to encounter a number of extremely well-crafted invitations to lose our tempers badly.
3
Our partner will press a well-flagged nuclear button related, let's imagine, to their views on our mother or our career choice.
4
At work, a colleague may deliberately not answer a very simple question to which we so urgently need an answer.
5
A shop attendant may give us a bored, insolent shrug.
6
Someone in the supermarket may falsely accuse us of standing in the wrong line.
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What we're apt to miss at such moments of blatant provocation, as we get swallowed up in fears of humiliation,
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illogicality and injustice, is just how much many people enjoy having arguments – indeed,
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crave them – in order to re-find their equilibrium and appease their psychic discomforts.
10
We're tricked into imagining that there may be genuine issues that require a wholehearted engagement,
11
but we thereby lose sight of the true psychological motivations at play.
12
A person is trying to get us into a fight not because they have a sincere complaint against us,
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but because they're feeling overwhelmed by the intensity of their own aggression,
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which they hope to placate by spoiling a portion of our lives.
15
By goading us into a battle, they're looking for a way to evacuate their fury into us, to use us as a receptacle for their emotional waste,
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to employ a skirmish with us to distract themselves from their own intractable conflicts and muted sorrows,
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to seduce us into joining them in their sadness and entanglements so that they might feel less alone and less bereft.
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We should resist such enthusiastic
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and subtly crafted invitations by recognizing them for what they are
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– attempts by the other party to rescue themselves from unbearable feelings.
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We might, if we are exceptionally generous, pity them for their despair.
22
we don't in any way need to join them in their gladiatorial quests.
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What may at times provoke us to a particular pitch of
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excitement is a puzzlement as to why others are behaving as they are.
25
Why on earth we wander in a strangled way?
26
Have they once again mentioned something we implored them to leave alone?
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Why are they being almost deliberately slow or rude or surly?
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Why is someone who should be kind and thoughtful suddenly so offhand and cruel.
29
There aren't any good reasons for this discord.
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It's just that our interlocutor is in a very bad way and has concluded,
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not incorrectly alas, that they may well feel significantly better once we've started to raise our voice,
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redden and call them horrible names we'll later regret with intensity.
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We should work out the clever game and refuse to play any further rounds of it, whether the invitee is our spouse,
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stranger, our child or colleague.
35
We're not being kind by leaving them to it.
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We're not being pacific or eerily grown up.
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It's just there is so much else that needs our attention.
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We have to hold on to our thoughts, repair our wounds, appease our turmoils and discover our own roots to happiness.
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We must sidestep the many dragnets because we have so many other, truly more important things to do.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This video has 39 sentences and 544 words to shadow. The speech runs for 3:35. The speaker talks at a natural 152 words per minute, close to everyday conversation. Only 75% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is demanding.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| craft noun | /ˈkɹæft/ | Ability, skillfulness, especially skill in making plans and carrying them into execution; dexterity in managing affairs, adroitness, practical cunning… |
| intensity noun | /ɪnˈtɛnsɪti/ | The quality of being intense. |
| invitation noun | /ɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/ | The act of inviting; solicitation; the requesting of a person's company. |
| deliberately adverb | /dɪˈlɪb.(ə.)ɹət.li/ | Intentionally, or after deliberation; not accidentally. |
| colleague noun | /ˈkɒliːɡ/ | A fellow member of a profession, staff, academic faculty or other organization; an associate, a workmate. |
| rescue verb | /ˈɹɛs.kjuː/ | To save from any violence, danger or evil. |
| trick noun | /ˈtɹɪk/ | Something designed to fool, dupe, outsmart, mislead or swindle. |
| badly adverb | /ˈbæd.li/ | In a bad manner. |
| happiness noun | /ˈhæpinɪs/ | The emotion of being happy; joy; elation. |
| horrible adjective | /ˈhɔɹ.ɪ.bəl/ | Causing horror; terrible; shocking. |
| commitment noun | /kəˈmɪtmənt/ | The act of sending a legislative bill to committee for review. |
| pitch noun | /pɪt͡ʃ/ | A throw; a toss; a cast, as of something from the hand. |
| repair verb | /ˈɹiːpɛɚ/ | To restore to good working order, fix, or improve damaged condition; to mend; to remedy. |
| discover verb | /dɪˈskʌvə/ | To find or learn something for the first time. |
| refuse verb | /ɹɪˈfjuːz/ | To decline (a request or demand). |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| grow up verb | To mature and become an adult. | |
| work out verb | /ˌwɝk ˈaʊt/ | To calculate. |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 11 contractions and reduced forms, such as we're, they're, aren't. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: thereby /ðɛɹˈbaɪ/, theoretical /ˌθi.əˈɹɛt.ɪ.kəl/, enthusiastic /ɪnˌθjuːzɪˈæstɪk/, thoughtful /ˈθɔːtfəl/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: invitation /ɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/, motivation /ˈmoʊ.tə.veɪ.ʃən/, aggression /əˈɡɹɛʃən/, exceptionally /ɪkˈsɛp(t)ʃənəli/, humiliation /hjuːˌmɪliˈeɪʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: intensity /ɪnˈtɛnsɪti/, invitation /ɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/, deliberately /dɪˈlɪb.(ə.)ɹət.li/, psychological /ˌsaɪ.kəˈlɑː.d͡ʒɪ.kl̩/, motivation /ˈmoʊ.tə.veɪ.ʃən/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like craft, intensity, invitation.
מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?
שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.